Higher Ground Exposed
by UnknownAlias2001
Summary: Chap. 41 Brothers and Sisters, part 6 -8: Group Discussions and Revelations
1. Author's Note

Author's note:  
- First off all Disclaimers Apply. I make no money off of this, it's just for fun.  
-Higher Ground Exposed is a series of about several (There are over nine that I have already finished) stories that I started over a year ago and have been working on ever since. I have posted the first three stories on fanfiction.net before, but I pulled them off when I was unable to continue my stories, so if they sound familiar I did not steal them, they were my own to begin with. So any author notes that seem out of place, ignore, because these are from when I posted before.   
  
-The stories deal with the original characters and also a few characters that I have created, but trust me the new characters will not over shadow any of the original ones, they simply help to show a new part of the original character's life. And I will eventually have a website with all of these stories posted and some other goodies as well, if people are interested.  
  
-All of the stories relate to each other, so they should be read in succession. The stories also deal with many story arcs. Situations that are brought up in one story might not be solved until many stories later. I have tried to make these as much like the show as possible, but I also used a lot of what if factors. You will see the cliffhangers and counselors dealing with things that might have been too controversial or unpopular for Fox Family to deal with.   
  
- If anyone wants to use any characters that I have created please ask first.  
  
- And lastly let me know what you think, because if nobody likes the stories, then I will propably not finish the series. 


	2. A Season for Change part 1

A Season for Change , Part one   
  
Disclaimer: Most of these characters belong to Fox Family. I only own a few and   
will probably add more as I go along.   
  
Anything written in ( ) is action or set up to the scene.   
  
My story begins as if it were a new season of Higher Ground. If you've already   
watched the first season then you'll know what's going on, if you haven't, read this   
anyway and then watch the show to catch up. Anyway, it's been three months since   
the morp, summer has pasted and things have happened, but it will all be revealed if   
you read.  
  
Quote "Change is a measure of time and, in the autumn, time seems speeded up.   
What was is not and never again will be; what is is change.   
Edwin Way Teale   
  
(Peter is sitting in his office reading over some files. There is a knock at the   
door. The door is pushed open and there stands Sophie.)  
  
" So Mountain man ready for the new admits?" Sophie asks him walking   
into the office.  
"Actually, I've decided to let Roger and Jeff handle it." Peter says, almost   
smugly, taking his feet from down off the desk, which he'd been using as a footstool.  
"I know you decided to share the work, but Jeff?" She asks questioningly.   
"Are you sure he's ready for that?"   
"Well he has to start sometime and now that Kat's gone, were short a   
counselor. Besides Roger is helping him out." At the mention of Kat's name Peter   
begins to look a little sad.  
"You really miss her don't you?" Sophie asks.  
"It's just that she was doing such a good job as a counselor and I know what   
her leaving does to the other cliffhangers."   
"Well, it's not like she's gone forever. She did say she'd probably come visit   
over break. After all Hank lives up here and the two of them were just beginning to   
get really close when she left."   
"I know you're right, I just wish that she hadn't left so soon after..."  
" I know what you mean, but it wasn't like she left because it happened. We   
knew when the summer started that she'd only be here for two months, before she   
headed off to Yale. It's just that it happened then." Peter nodded, still not sure. "I'm   
sure she's fine Peter." Sophie says leaning over to look him in the eye.   
"I know somebody else whose fine." Peter says flirtatiously, changing the   
subject.   
Sophie sits down on his lap, "And who would that be, mountain man?" She   
says with a smile.  
"Well, my beautiful fiancee of course." He says and kisses her. The kiss goes   
on, until suddenly they here a car horn. "That must be the new admits." He says   
pulling away.  
"Roger and Jeff can handle them." Sophie says kissing him.   
Peter pulls away. "I think the parents might want to meet me."  
"Having second thoughts about Jeff." Sophie says knowingly, standing up.  
"Let's just say it concerns me." He says getting up and heading out the door.  
  
(This would be where the opening credits would come on, of course this year they   
would include David as a regular. But anyway the next scene would be after the all-  
famous Early edition commercial or even better a paranoia commercial. )  
  
(The set up for this scene, is the cliffhangers in the kitchen, minus Kat, but including   
David. Shelby and Scott are washing dishes side by side. Julliette and Auggie are   
drying, David and Daisy are across, but facing each other wiping off the counters   
and Ezra is sweeping the floors.)  
"Hey, Scott can you hand me that plate?" Shelby asks. Scott grabs the plate   
and passes it to Shelby. " Thanks." Shelby says and gives him a kiss. The other   
cliffhangers groan and Scott and Shelby pull apart. "What?" She asks.  
"We all know you two are in love." Daisy says rolling her eyes, "But do we   
have to watch it."   
"I don't mind what they do, as long as they don't mind if I do this." Julliette   
says then leans over and kisses Auggie.  
"What do you say Dais? Want to join them?' David says with a smile. Daisy   
gives him a flirtatious smile and leans towards him.   
Then just as he was about to kiss her, she says, " I hope I am never like   
them." She then turns away to begin wiping off a different counter. The other   
cliffhangers laugh, as Ezra breathes a sigh of relief.  
The cliffhangers settle back down to work, but a few minutes later Julliette   
says, " Can you guys believe Kat is really gone?"  
"Who would have guessed she'd actually decide to leave?" Shelby says   
sarcastically.   
"Well she did have some problems counseling this summer, but I thought   
she'd stay." Ezra says.   
"I wonder how she is." Auggie says.  
"Kat can take care of herself." Scott says. "Even after what happened."  
"Who would have thought Kat would end up with such a basket case in her   
group." Daisy added.  
"Sophie said that Peter offered to take him out of the group, but Kat said she   
could handle it." Shelby added.  
"I just hope she's OK." Julliette says looking sort of sad.  
  
(It now flashes to Kat sitting at a desk in her dorm room. We see her leaned   
over writing and we hear Kat's voice as she writes.)  
Dear Peter, Sophie and the rest of the cliffhangers,  
School's going find, but I have trouble finding time to write to all of you   
because of my class schedule. My new job also makes it hard. I work with a group of   
seven to ten years olds at a community center near campus. My advisor thought it   
would be a good job for me since I want to be a counselor. I him after three years at   
Horizon and the experience this past summer, I didn't really think it was a good idea,   
but I needed a job, so I took it. Besides you guys always taught me that I couldn't run   
from my problems.   
It's hard adjusting to life away from Horizon. I've been away from there for   
only a month, but it seems like a lifetime. It's hard remembering that not everyone is as   
good as the people at Horizon. I still think about what happened, Peter. I know it   
wasn't my fault, but I wish I could have done more. But don't worry, because I'm   
managing.  
I've made some new friends (and not the kind that will get me in trouble Peter).   
And I'm thinking of pledging a sorority: The Alpha Delta's. They're known for their   
work in community service, so I thought it would be good for me, but there is another   
group on campus that I would like to join also. It's called the Explorers and they do all   
sorts of outward bound activities. Think Horizon without the emotional strings.  
Well I have class in fifteen minutes. Will write again soon. I miss you all.  
Love,   
Kat  
Kat stands up after putting the letter in an envelope and addressing it. She grabs   
her backpack and heads out the door.   



	3. A Season for Change part 2

Part two of A Season for Change  
  
(This scene takes place the next morning. Peter is at his home sitting at the kitchen table reading the letter from Kat. Sophie walks in from the outside carrying a load of laundry.)  
  
" Is Kat doing well?" Sophie asked. Peter looks up.  
"How you'd know it was from Kat?"  
"By the worried look on your face." She sets the laundry down, as he hands her the letter. She quickly scans it. " Wow, seems like Kat's doing OK, but she says she's fine, so why are you so worried?"  
"Because I know her Soph. It's like she's lying to me on paper. I know she's not all right."  
"She says she's managing, Peter. Maybe she is OK and your just reading to much into it."  
"Soph, don't tell me that. I know Kat I had her for three years. I know when she's all right and not all right." He says slightly angry.  
"Look, I'm not trying to upset you," She says coming up behind him and putting her arms around him. "It's just I love you and I hate to see you like this." Peter turned around to face her.   
"I know, Soph, but it's hard. I know Kat was ready to graduate when she did, but then when Jack... I just don't know how she manages. You yourself said it was a hard thing to handle and you weren't even his counselor. She was. I wish we could have talked about it more before she left." Sophie gives him a concerned look.  
"If you're really that worried about her, why don't you call her. I bet she'd love to hear from you and your dying to know how she is." Peter checks his watch.  
"Isn't it too early?"   
"Peter this is Kat were talking about. She hates to be late, especially for class. I bet she's been awake for at least half an hour.' Peter nods.  
"I love you Sophie." He says giving her a hug and a kiss.  
"I know." She says with a smile. Then she picks up the laundry basket. " I'll just leave you to make that call." She heads out of the room. Peter picks up the phone and dials. The phone rings several times before the answering machine picks up.   
Hey this is Kat, and this is Tammy, were not in right now, but if you leave a message after the beep we'll get back to ya soon." BEEP.  
Peter looks at the phone contemplating hanging up, but then Sophie walks back into the room holding a basket of folded laundry, and he leaves one.  
"Kat, this is Peter, I was just calling you to let you know I got your letter. I was also wondering how you were. I know your busy, so just call when you get a chance."  
"Not home?" Sophie asks as Peter hangs back up the phone.   
"No, she's not home. But I left a message."  
'Yea I heard." She looks at him, knowing he's worried. " I bet that she calls you as soon as she gets the message."  
"I hope." He says. Sophie realizing how worried he is, but knowing that for now there is nothing that the two of them can do, changes the subject.   
"Why don't we head off, before were late?" She asks. Peter looks at her. In his worry about Kat, he'd almost forgotten he still had to go to Horizon.   
"All right." He says picking up his keys. "Why don't you ride with me?"  
"Peter, I don't think that's a good idea." She says.   
"Come on Sophie."  
'I just mean I have to finish folding the laundry."  
'Sophie it's folded." He says pointing at the basket. " Why don't you want to ride with me?"  
"Peter, I just don't think it's a good idea for the students to see us so close."  
"Sophie they know were engaged. I don't think by us riding my dirt bike to school is going to give them any ideas."  
"I know it's just that..."  
'Sophie, us riding on the same bike together will not inform them of the fact that were living together." Sophie smiles, knowing how silly she's being about it and knowing he is right.  
'I know, but I just don't want them to find out, at least not yet. Shelby and the others would definitely give us a hard time.'  
"They won't find out. I'm not telling are you?"  
'No."  
"Then come on." He says grabbing her a helmet from by the door. " Lets go."   
Sophie takes the helmet. "All right, but if they find out, I'm telling them it was all your idea."   
(Sophie and Peter then head out the door)  
  
(Later at Horizon, the same day. The cliffhangers are sitting in class. Jeff stands before them. They are discussing "All Quiet on the Western Front."  
A novel, that they just finished reading for History class."  
"It is thought to be the greatest war novel, and the greatest anti war  
novel of all time." Jeff said.  
"How can it be both?" Julliette asked.  
"People thought it was the greatest war novel because they were all friends and stood by each other.   
It showed comardieness."  
'that's right." Jeff said." Anyone know why it's referred to as the greatest anti war novel?"  
"Gee, could it be the overwhelming and horrifyingly accurate  
depiction of war?" Daisy said sarcastically.  
"That's right Daisy." he said and began to walk around the class room.  
"Many times we feel strongly about something. Sometimes we can hate something  
so much, and love it at the same time. For instance, I love to go on quests."   
The class laughs. " What?" He asks.  
"How can you love them, your always getting hurt?' Shelby asks.  
"Well that's what I hate about quests." He sits down on the edge of a desk.  
"I was not made to go on quests. I still go, but I am a klutz. I try, but it  
seems like the more I try the more I get hurt." The class again laughs. So does Jeff.  
"I'm sure you all have things that are like that. That you love and hate at the same time.  
that you have to opposing opinions of. Well I want to hear it." He says and stands and walks around the   
room again. 'I want a 1000 word essay over something that you feel you love and hate. It's due on Friday. So   
You have four days to complete the assignment. Class dismissed." The class groaned and begin to stand and leave.  
"Well this ought to be fun, don't ya think?" Daisy asked Shelby sarcastically.  
"I think I'll write about how I love and hate this assignment." David says, overhearing Daisy.  
"Oh wait, I don't love it. Never mind." He then walks out of the room.  
"So what are you going to write about?" Scott asks, walking up to them.  
"Wow, seems like everyone wants to know what I love and hate." Shelby says sarcastically and leaves the room.  
'What's her problem?" Scott asks.  
"Propably can't narrow down what she wants to write about. You know Shelby, she loves and hates everything.'  
"You know that's kind of cold." Scott says and huffs off.  
"What did I say?" Daisy asks as Ezra walks up.  
"Think about it Dais. You said so yourself, Scott and Shelby are in love. If she loves and hates everything, that includes him." With that he  
too walks away.  
" I didn't mean it like that." She calls after him. "Males, you can't live with them and you can't avoid them either." She then grabs her books and heads out of the room.  



	4. A Season for Change part 3

A season for change - Part three  
(Later that evening. Kat comes in followed by a tall, thin blonde girl: her roommate Tammy. Tammy is like Kat in the fact that she enjoys outdoor sports. Tammy is a sophomore at Yale and is a member of the Explorers, a group Kat is thinking of joining. Kat finds Tammy easy to talk to, and since Kats been here, her and Tammy have become fast friends. They have just returned from the gym where they were competing to see who could climb the wall fastest. The other Explorer members had been impressed by Kat's ability. Kat and Tammy enter the room talking and laughing.)  
"And did you see the look on Matt's face when you flew by him? His jaw hit the floor. And I thought Andrea was going to fall when you offered to help her if she needed it." Tammy said laughing. "Nobody has ever spoke to her like that. You just earned yourself a reputation among them."  
"So I did OK?" Kat said with a smile.  
"OK, you were great. Oh, I so hope you join the Explorers, we could really use someone with your athletic ability when we go to competitions." She set her gym bag down by her bed and then noticed the blinking red light on the answering machine. "Hey Kat, we've got messages. Think maybe there from Hank." She said raising her eyebrows when she said Hanks name.  
"Shut up." Kat said smiling and throwing a pillow at her roommate. " You never know it could be from Jake." She said naming Tammy's boyfriend.  
"You've got a point there lets find out." With that she hit the play button.  
"Hey guys, party tonight at Jefferson hall, hope you can make it. It starts at ten. Hope to see you there. Bye."  
Tammy rolled her eyes. "Isn't Megan so great at invitations. She doesn't even leave a name. Guess it's good she's my best friend or else she'd be in real trouble." Tammy said with a laugh.  
"Kat, this is Peter, I was just calling you to let you know I got your letter. I was also wondering how you were. I know your busy, so just call when you get a chance." Tammy hit the stop button.  
"Is that the all famous Peter that I keep hearing so much about?" She asked flopping down onto her bed.  
"The one and only." Kat said and sat down on her bed across from Tammy. " He's worried about me, I can tell."   
"Why is he so worried? I mean I know you attended this Horizon school for like three years, but you'd think now that your out he'd leave you alone." She said reaching over to her nightstand and pulling a bag of candy out of the draw.  
"It's not like that. Peter's like family to me."  
"Well Megan's like a sister, but she doesn't worry about me for no reason."  
"You don't understand."  
"Well then explain it to me. I mean you've told me about the fact that your sister died and that's how you ended up there and about the fact that you felt out of place since you were adopted by white parents, but there must be something you've left out. Maybe something more recent?" She asked. Kat rolled her eyes. Kat had found that Tammy was very much like herself, but there was one thing about her that made them different. Tammy was very nosy. Not in a bad way though. She didn't gossip; she just has to know everything.   
Kat sighed. " Well, if you must know..." She said.  
"And you know me, I must." Tammy said, turning around until she could see Kat better.   
"Well, it all started when this new kid Jack showed up at Horizon. Peter assigned him to my group. I thought I could handle it, but then as the weeks went by..." Kat shook her head. " Things got worse. I discovered that Jack had been..." Ring, ring. Kat jumped at the sound of the phone. She reached over and picked up the receiver. "Kat speaking." She said into the phone. " Hank!" She cried out happily. Tammy rolled her eyes and then got up, leaving the room so Kat could have privacy. Kat motioned for her to stay, but Tammy mouthed that she wanted a shower after their climbing at the gym. Kat nodded.  
"So what have you been up to?" Hank asked.  
"Well, I was getting ready to tell Tammy about Jack." She said. But the second the words were out of her mouth she regretted it.  
"Kat, I don't think you should tell her. Not after what happened."  
"Hank, it's not like she knows him or anything. Besides I've pretty much gotten past it."  
"Pretty much. Does that mean the nightmares have stopped?"  
Kat sighed. She knew if she told him no, that Peter would know within hours. " Look Hank, I can handle what happened. I've been doing just fine and talking about it helps me."  
"I never said you shouldn't talk about it. Remember I'm the one you told you to talk about it? But I'm not sure you should discuss it with Tammy. I mean not everyone is as understanding as Peter and Sophie."  
"Hank, I know, but if I want to talk about it with Tammy that's my choice. Just like it's my choice if I want to talk about it with you." She said angrily.  
"Fine. If you don't want to talk with me, I'll just let you go. Bye." With that Hank hung up. Kat stared at the phone as tears weld up in her eyes. She knew Hank was mad. Mad at Jack for what happened. Mad at her for what happened. But she'd had no control over it. If only she hadn't agreed to take Jack on as a member of her group. Or maybe if she'd let Peter remove him from the group before... Before things became so bad that they were out of control.  
(Sophie and Peter are in Peter's house having a romantic candlelit dinner. Sophie is wearing a dress and Peter looks really handsome in a pair of dress pants and a sweater.)  
"So, have you heard from Kat?" Sophie asked.  
"No, but I'm sure she got my message and will call me as soon as she gets a chance." Peter said trying to keep his voice even. He was really worried. He sighed, putting his fork down. " I just don't know why she hasn't called. I called her at seven this morning. It's now seven p.m. and she hasn't called back yet. You don't think she's having problems do you?"  
"Peter, I think your worrying a bit much. Her letter said she was managing and that she'd been making friends. I don't think we have to worry so much."  
Peter sighed. "I know your right. But my gut is telling me something different. I just think if I could talk to her."  
"Peter she's been gone a month, why is this such a big deal now?"  
"Well, over the last month she's been writing and calling and it seemed like she was fine, but then... I don't know. The other night I just began to get this feeling that something was wrong and then I receive that letter from her and now I'm sure of it." Sophie looked at him concerned.   
"OK, if you're that worried, why don't you invite her up for the weekend? She can stay with us for a few days. The cliffhangers would be happy to see her. Not to mention Hank would be happy also. Not to mention you've been talking about starting that new program for Horizon graduates. You know to reacquaint them with the world. Well Kat would probably be able to give you some insight on it."   
"You know Soph, that's a good idea." He said and got a flirtatious look on his face. " I knew there was a reason I asked you to move in." He leaned over and kissed her.  
"So you like me for my good ideas?" She said smiling back as he started to stand up.   
"That and the way you kiss." He said kissing her again, then he headed out of the room.  
"Where are you going?"   
"To call Kat and see if she wants to come visit."  



	5. A Season for Change part 4

A season for change: Part four  
  
(Next day. It's raining so the cliffhangers are in the lodge. They are spread out across the room. Auggie and Julliette are on the couch working on their essays, Scott and Shelby are sitting at a table in the corner and Ezra, Daisy and David are sitting at another table across from them. Even though they're spread out in smaller groups, they are all sitting close enough to discuss things)  
"What's the essay about?" Scott asks putting his pencil down and closing his notebook. He'd been thinking about the comment that Daisy had made earlier.  
"Kind of getting personal. Aren't we?" She asked.  
Scott leaned forward-looking Shelby in the eye. " Is it to personal to tell your boyfriend?" He said keeping his voice low.  
"Scott..." Shelby closes her eyes and then takes a deep breathe. "It's about my mom." She says quietly.   
Scott is shocked. Not by who it's about, but because she told him. He leaned over and kissed her. "Thank you." He says.  
"For what?" She asks, knowing why, but wanting him to say it.  
"For telling me. I know it took a lot. But I also thought it could have been about me."  
"About you? Why would I write about you? I could never hate someone who loves me like you do." She leans over and kisses him. " So what's your about?" She asks after the kiss ended.  
"My dad." He says in an even tone.  
"You're still not talking?"  
"No. He still thinks it's my fault. And he's mad." He says fighting to control the tone in his voice.  
"He'll come around Scott. You'll work things out."  
"Work things out?" Scott says, his voice rising. He lowers it when people look. "Could we just not talk about it please?"  
"Sure, but I know, so if you want to talk..." Her voice trails off as he shakes his head.   
"How's the essays going guys?" Sophie asks walking into the lodge.  
"Well, if it isn't our fearless leader." Daisy says sarcastically.  
"You've been MIA for a few days now. Peter more then you can handle?" Shelby asks.   
Sophie ignored them. " I've been busy that's all."   
"I bet." Shelby said. Sophie gave her a look.  
"Hey guys, I've got some good news." Peter said coming up behind Sophie. "Kat is coming for a visit this weekend.'  
"She's coming back to campus?" Julliette asked a little surprised. "She hasn't been back since..." Her voice trailed off. The cliffhangers sat there remembering what had happened earlier that summer.   
"Kat's dealing with what happened. She might be a little off this first visit, but I think she'll get through it." Peter said. The cliffhangers still didn't seem convinced.   
"Peter's right. Kat has been adjusting well to college life. And what happened here with Jack will only be a small problem, if a problem at all.' Sophie said. The cliffhangers nodded, accepting that as an answer for the time being.   
"Well we better let you guys get back to work on your essays." Peter said a little awkwardly. He then walked out of the room, followed by Sophie.  
"I don't know how I'll ever get this essay done." Ezra said to no one imparticuarly.   
"Well what do you love and hate?" Julliette asked.  
"He loves Daisy." David says raising his eyebrows. Then with a wicked grin says, " And he hates, that I'm with her." Ezra gave David a dirty look and then got up and left the table.  
"Why did you do that?" Daisy asked, "Never mind." She said and stood up grabbing her stuff. 'Just so you know, I'm not with anybody." She said and walked away.  
  
. (A few minutes later in Peter's office)  
"You really think Kat will be OK?" Sophie asked Peter once they were out of the room. Hoping that maybe he'd quit worrying.   
"No, but we'll find out when she gets here." Sophie starts to say something to him, but there's a knock at the door. "Come in." He called.  
The door opens and Hank walks in. "Hey, Hank." Sophie said. " Long time no see."  
"We didn't expect to see you until tomorrow, when Kat gets here." Peter said.  
"I know, but I need to talk to you. About Kat."  
'I'll just leave you two alone.' Sophie says and leaves the office.   
"Have a seat." Peter says, motioning for Hank to sit down. Hank sits. "So what is it you need to talk to me about."  
'Well, I'm worried about Kat. The other night I called to see how she was, but we ended up getting into a fight. I'm not even sure how it happened, but it did."  
"Was the fight about Jack?" Peter asked.  
Hank sighed. "Yes. It seems all Kat and me do now is argue. And usually it's about Jack and what happened. I just can't seem to forget. She's my girlfriend and to think she did nothing." He says starting to lose his temper. " I just don't know how to get past it."  
"Hank it wasn't her fault. Or yours for that matter. Jack had deeper emotional and psychological problems then any of us knew. Had I known he never would have been in Kat's group. He probably wouldn't have even been in Horizon." Peter said looking Hank in the eye.  
"No offense peter, but that doesn't help me get over it." He sighs." I just can't seem to let it go."  
"Have you tried listening to Kat?"  
"What do you mean?"  
"Well I know you told her to talk about it with me and Sophie, but did you ever listen to why she did what she did?"  
"Peter, we've talked about it many times."  
"Yes, but do you listen to what she says?' He gets up and walks around the desk. He sits down on the edge. "If you really want to get over it. Have her tell you again, only this time listen to what she says, don't just hear the words. Kat had very good reasons for doing what she did. You'll probably agree with her once you listen to them."  
Hank nods and stands up. "I guess it's worth a try. If she's even willing to talk to me after I hung up on her."  
"I'm sure she will." Peter says putting a hand on Hanks shoulder.  
'I'll see you tomorrow then." Hank says and leaves Peters office.  
Peter sighs and then sits back down at his desk to do some work.  



	6. A Season for Change part 5

A season for change: Part 5  
  
(Kat arrives in Agnes late on Friday and goes straight to Peters.)  
  
Knock, knock, knock. Sophie walks to the door and opens it. "Kat." She cries happily, pulling Kat into a hug. Kat welcomes the hug. She's missed Sophie and Peter.  
"Where's Peter?" Kat asks after the hug ended. She set her bag down by the door.   
"He wanted to be here, but he had to run into town real quick. Curtis needed him to help with something." Sophie answered. Kat looks disappointed, so Sophie changes the subject. " Well, you look good, how's college?" She asks and her and Kat head to the couch.  
"It's pretty good. I'm sure you've read my letters though. It's different from Horizon. But I'm taking it one day at a time and things seem to be getting better and better." Kat says with a smile.  
"How are things with you and Hank? Long distance relationships can be hard." At the mention of Hanks name, Kat's face clouds a little. "Oh sorry, I didn't know it was a sore spot."  
Kat sighs. " It's OK. It's just that we had a fight. After the prom, I mean morp, " Kat smiles at the memory. " We really started to get close again."  
"I know I remember." Sophie says with a smile. Kat and Hank had spent a lot of time together over the summer. Kat had even stayed at Hanks for a while when things started to get bad with Jack.   
"Well, things were great. And then this whole thing with Jack happened and he just doesn't get it. I mean, I know he still loves me and I love him, but he can't get past the fact that I did nothing about Jack."   
"Is Jack the only problem?"  
"Yes. As long as we don't talk about him everything is OK, but the second Jack's name is mentioned, Hank sees red." Kat sighs. " You'd think he's want to talk to me about it. After all he was the one who told me to talk to you and Peter about it."  
Sophie smiled, " I don't think Peter would have not let you talk to him about it." She thinks for a moment and then gets more serious. "Peter's been really worried about you, so have I. How are you doing since...?"  
"Well, I still think about it." She stops for a moment, debating on whether or not to tell Sophie about the nightmares. "I still have nightmares. They're not as bad as they were and they're less often, but they still happen. My roommate wants me to tell her about what happened. I was about to when Hank called the other night, but then we got into a fight, so Tammy doesn't know. I'm not sure I should tell her." Kat looks up at Sophie.  
" If you're still having nightmares, Kat, then maybe you should tell her. If the two of you are as close as you say you are, then she'll understand. Maybe you should also think about talking to someone about it."   
"You mean like a counselor?" Kat asked.  
"Well, maybe. I know that you just went through three years of counseling, but that was about your sister, not Jack. Talking about it always helps."  
" I know, but it seems all I do is talk about it. I told you and Peter. Now Hank and I are trying to work through it." Kat thinks a moment. " I think maybe if I work things out with Hank it will help. The nightmares are getting less and less, and although I think about it, it's not like it's consuming me. I just worry about what Hank thinks. I know this is hard for him. I'm his girlfriend. I know he wanted to go after Jack."  
"Boy did he ever." Sophie said. " It took Peter and Curtis to hold him back when they brought Jack out." Sophie stood, heading for the kitchen. "Hank may be small, but he's strong."  
"I kind of would have liked to see that." Kat said with a laugh, but then remembered. " I just wish Hank wasn't so angry about what happened. What Jack did was wrong, but he needed help. That's why I couldn't press charges."  
"I know Kat." Sophie said walking back into the room, with two cups of tea. "I don't know what I would have done in your situation, but I think you made the right choice. Jack didn't know what he was doing."  
" I know. I just wish Hank did."  
(It's early the next morning. Kat, Sophie and Peter are getting ready to go to Horizon. Kat and Peter talked the night before about how Kat was.)  
Knock, knock. "I'll get it." Kat called. She opened the door. On the steps sat a vase of roses. She leaned down and grabbed the card. " Please forgive me." She said to herself softly as she read. Suddenly a shadow appeared over her.  
"I'm sorry." Hank said. Kat looked up smiling. She was still upset that he'd hung up on her, but she hadn't seen him in a month and her joy won out. She stood and gave him a hug.  
"It's so good to see you." He said hugging her back. But then he pulled away. "Am I forgiven?" He asked.  
"What do you think?" She asked. Then she kissed him.  
There was a sudden noise and Kat and Hank broke the kiss off. Turning around they discovered Peter and Sophie in the door way.  
"Look who came to see me." Kat said blushing at having been caught.  
"I came to see if Kat wanted to go to breakfast with me." Hank said quickly.  
"Is that OK Peter? I know I said I'd help you with that program and the cliffhangers propably want to see me." Kat said.  
"It's fine. You two have fun. We'll see you tonight and tommorow morning before you leave." Peter said. Kat and Hank headed for his car.  
"Have fun you two." Sophie called after them. Then turning to Peter," They're really cute together aren't they?"  
"Not as cute as us." Peter said, pulling Sophie into a passionate kiss.   
  
(Later that morning Kat and Hank are sitting by the river. Kat is leaning against Hank and Hank has his arms around kat.)  
"We used to come here last year." Kat said," remember?"  
"It wasn't that long ago, Kat." Hank says softly.  
"It feels like a long time."  
"When a lot of things happen it feels like a long time." Hank paused for a moment thinking about the last few months. " Things change, Kat."   
"They say change is the only thing that is consistent."   
"I know." He looks down at her. " I still love you though. I want you to know that."  
"I still love you too, but ..." She hesitates for a moment not wanting to ruin there weekend together. She sighs. Then pushes herself up off his lap and turns to face him. "We can't put this off, Hank. We need to talk about what happened with Jack. You're still not getting it and until you do, I can't get past it either."   
"I know." He shakes his head. " I've been talking to Peter and I think I'm ready to really listen to you about what happened. But I want to also talk to you." He takes a deep breathe. " I want to know what happened exactly and why you did what you did, but I also want you to know why I haven't listened to you all this time."  
"I know why you didn't listen to me."  
He gives her a questioning look. And then with smile asks, " OK. Why?"  
"Because you saw me during the time I worked with Jack. I was scared, because he was so angry. Because you saw him threaten me that night. Because I pushed Peter and Sophie away and didn't want to talk about it. And because I left without going back to campus and dealing with it. I went on to college and ignored what happened. But Hank," She says looking at him. " I really think I'm OK now. At least I do when I'm not here or talking to you." She looks away from him. "I don't know how I'll react when I go back to campus, but I'd like to think that after three years of counseling I've managed to get something out of it."  
Hank smiled. "All right now that I told you my reasons." He says chuckling, " Why don't you tell me what happened? Peter and I talked and I think I'm really ready to hear you now."  
Kat pleased that he'd been talking with Peter. Then it hits her and she laughs.  
"What?" Hank asks her.  
"You talking to Peter. I would have loved to see that." She says continuing to laugh. Hank gives her a look.  
"Hey ever since you became a counselor, he isn't all bad."  
"I know." Kat says and settles back down into Hank's arms. " Peter and Sophie treat me like an equal instead of a student. It's nice, but different." She takes a deep breath. " So are you ready to hear about Jack now, or would you rather enjoy the moment."  
"I think that if it will help you. I'm ready to listen." Kat nodded, then stood.  
"Where are you going?" Kat reached down taking Hanks hand.   
"Come on, were going to campus."  
"I thought you were going to tell me about Jack?" He gives her a questioning look.  
"I am, but I'm going to have to go back to campus sometime. I might as well tell you about it in the place that it happened."  
"Are you sure you're ready to do that?" Hank asked with a concerned look.  
"I'm sure. It's been a month and I'm ready." She says with conviction.  
"All right then. Let's go." Hank stands and the two walk back to his car.  



	7. A Season for Change part 6

A season for change: part 6.   
While riding back to Campus, Kat begins to think about how she met Jack. The first few days had been eventful. Peter telling her that she should talk to him, since she might understand his depression. Jack yelling at her, after she followed him out when he ran out of group. Something she did many times with Jack. Megan telling her that he would come around. So many things happened in those first few weeks.  
FLASHBACK:  
(This is the beginning of June. The normal Academic year has ended. His parents brought Jack to campus a couple days earlier. Kat has been on a quest. It was her first quest as a counselor. Graduation had been just over a week earlier and she'd spent several days at home with her family before returning on Friday and taking over the Trackers as her group. Megan and her, who were working as co - counselors, had taken the Trackers out on a quest. Kat and Megan had returned from the quest earlier that morning and after getting cleaned up and settled in, Kat goes to Peter's office. Because Peter wants to talk to her.)  
"Peter?" Kat asks opening the door after knocking.  
"Come on in Kat." Peter says motioning for her to sit in the chair across from him. "How was your first quest as a counselor?"  
"It was nice, but different. It's hard being the one doing the counseling, instead of being counseled." She said sitting down. "You get used to doing all the talking and now you're the one being talked too."  
"I'm sure you're doing a good job." Peter smiled. " Megan seems to think so. She said you handled everything just fine and that the group is starting to open up to you a little, now that they know your there for them."  
"Yea." She thought for a moment. " I think it helps that they know that I've been where they are."  
"That's true it does. They seem to think former students understand better. Which is why I'm putting a new admit in your group." He said walking around the desk and sitting down on the edge of it. He picked up a folder and handed it to Kat. "His names Jack. Jack Houston. His parents brought him in two days ago, so he's heard the talk. He hasn't really spoken to anyone yet, but his parents say he has trouble adjusting to new situations."  
Kat smiles, happy that Peter trusts her with a new student, but then she thinks for a moment. "Why are you telling me and not Megan?"  
"Well, Megan may be the main counselor for the Trackers, but I think you can reach Jack. You know where he's been." Kat gives him a questioning look.  
"Jack's battling depression." Kat nodded understandingly opening the file and scanning it as Peter continued. "His parents can't think of any reason for it. He was a straight a student, president of the class, really popular, but then he just quit. His parents say he resigned as president, dumped his friends and his girlfriend and just gave up. His grades fell and when his parents discovered he'd been cutting, they took him to a psychologist. Who managed to help him quit cutting, but can't figure out his depression. His parents say he tends to shy away from group activities opting to be alone. But they say if you catch him on a good day he seems normal."  
Kat sighed; she knew what that was like. When your fine one moment and then not the next. It had happened to her, when her sister had died three years earlier.  
"But there's no reason for it?" Kat asked looking at the file.   
"No. He tested clean for drugs, but his parents said they found drugs in the house. They don't know why, that's why he's here."  
"When can I meet him?" Kat asked.  
"Well Megan's off campus.. She's off campus for lunch. She had a meeting with Max's mom. She wants to know how Max has been since his father visited." Kat sighed.  
"Max did well on the quest. After three months here, Megan says he's really beginning to feel at home here. But it's easy to tell that he still really angry at his father." Kat said. She looks at Peter. "How any father can do that to their child is beyond me."  
"Don't start holding a grudge, Kat. It won't help Max." Peter said knowingly. "It's not for us counselors to pass judgment. You have to remember that. These kids will come to look up to you and if you think they shouldn't do something they will trust your opinion 9 out of 10 times." Kat nodded. "You can meet Jack when Megan gets back." Peter said changing the subject. "That will give me time to finish this paper work." He said gesturing to his desk.  
Kat agreed. Then after looking at the file one last time before closing it handed it back to Peter.  
"I'll do my best with Jack, but that's not much to work off of." She said standing up.   
"I know. Just remember that's all any of us can do." Peter said, giving Kat a pat on the shoulder. He then walked back around his desk and sat down to begin his work.  
  
(Later that night. Megan and Kat are with the Trackers having group therapy. There are six kids, including Jack, in the group. Megan and Kat have already met Jack earlier that day. Kat had introduced herself, but Jack had ignored her. Megan and Peter had both said she should try to talk to him again.)  
"All right guys." Megan said, getting the groups attention." Tonight we have a new Tracker among us, so were going to do something that lets him get to know us a little better." She picks up a pole that is next to her. "It's time for pass the staff. Tonight start by introducing yourself, then complete this sentence 'I once...'" Megan tossed the staff to a young blond girl who was across from her.   
"Lindsay McCain. I once..." The young girl thinks for a moment then says," I once cried." She passes the staff to a brown haired boy that is across from her. He catches it easily.  
"Max Tenney. I once thought this was stupid." He said with a smile. He passed the staff to a tall thin African- American boy that was at his right.  
"Louis Wallbure." He says with an attitude. " I once..." He stops to think. Looking around the room as if to get ideas. His eyes connect with Megan's and he smirks. "I once ran." He then passes the staff to a chubby brown haired girl, who is sort of shying away from the group.   
She catches the staff awkwardly. "Mandy Osmond." She says in a small voice. "I once had parents who loved me."  
She then tosses the staff to a dark skinned girl, who is muscular. "Candace Kennedy." The girl proclaimed strongly. " I once... thought I was wrong." She says smugly and then passed the staff to Jack. Jack caught it, but didn't bother to look at the group. For a moment Kat thought he wouldn't answer.  
"Jack Houston." He said looking at the ground. " I once was foolish enough to believe I could be happy." He passed the staff back to Megan and headed for the door.  
Kat gave Megan a look that said she'd be right back. Then she jogged after Jack.  
"Jack! Jack! Hey wait up." She called jogging after him as he ran across campus.  
"What?" He said angrily turning around. For a second he seemed to tower over Kat. His eyes were cold, dark and menacing. "What? Do you want to help me? Try to make me think you understand what I'm going through. You don't get it. Your one of them." Kat was shocked and surprised. Shocked at the anger in his voice and surprised that he'd said so much.   
"Jack, I do want to help you." She said calmly.  
"Look, my parents have tried everything to help me. Herbalists, acupuncture, shrinks, everything. When they couldn't find a solution they sent me here. To a place where people get their jollies out of helping us poor teenagers who can't manage to cope with life. Well I'll tell you now; I'm not like them Kat. I don't need you to save me. I can save myself, if you guys would just back off." With that he turned and stormed off to the guys cabin.   
Kat stood there in shock. She was surprised at the amount of anger that Jack had expressed. 'It's propably just because he's new." Kat thought. Knowing everything she did about Jack, she figured that must be it. She took a deep breath, wondering how she was going to reach him and then headed back to the lodge where they were having group. The others had been dismissed when she came back and Megan was moving the chairs that they'd moved during group back to where they belonged.   
"How did things go with Jack?" Megan asked.  
"Well," Kat said sliding down onto the couch. " He's angry and doesn't want our help. But he did say more then one sentence to me, which is apparently more then he's said to anybody since he's been here according to Peter."  
Megan laughed. "He'll come around. They always do." She said and sat down next to Kat. "It gets easier you know."  
"It does?" Kat says turning to look at Megan.  
"Not really." She smiled. " No, the new ones are always the same. They don't want our help, but normally if you keep working at them, they'll give in. And there is nothing quite like it when you know you've helped them." She pauses for a moment. "Take Max for example. He came here three months ago. Wouldn't talk to anyone, could care less about school or friends. Then we started to get him to talk. It took about a month before he started to tell us anything personal and another month after that for him to begin to admit what happened. His dad coming was the final straw. It was what made him break down and tell us. And in the last month he's began to really put things together. So just give it time." She says giving Kat a hopeful smile. " Jack will open up."   
"I hope so."  
END OF FLASHBACK  
If only she'd known then. If only she'd been able to interpret what Jack had said. She heard the words again.  
"Look, my parents have tried everything to help me. Herbalists, acupuncture, shrinks, everything. When they couldn't find a solution they sent me here. To a place where people get their jollies out of helping us poor teenagers who can't manage to cope with life. Well I'll tell you now; I'm not like them Kat. I don't need you to save me. I can save myself, if you guys would just back off."  
He was right. She thought. He was different. But had she'd known what his solution would lead too... Kat shuddered at the memory.  
  
Flashback  
(This flashback picks up a week after the last flashback ended.. Kat has tried several times to talk with Jack, but she hasn't learned anything. Most of the time he spends by himself, but Kat and Megan have begun to notice little things about his behavior and they are discussing it with Peter.)  
"he just seems so angry." Kat said. " He seems like he's about to explode."  
"the other night in group he threw a chair across the room. I though it was going to hit Kat." Megan added. Peter looked at her concerned.  
"It's not unusual for new students to be angry." Peter said. "was he trying to hit you?" He asked Kat.  
"He was trying to hit something, but I don't think it was me." Kat answered trying to give Jack the benefit of the doubt.  
Peter is now confused. "What do you mean?"  
"Well, he talks about them a lot." Megan said.  
"Whose them?" Peter asked.  
"were not sure. We think it is propably his parents. He talks about how they made him quit everything and how they've been responsible for his actions." Megan said.  
"Are you learining anything else about him?" Peter asked the two girls.  
"No, but kat keeps trying. He sometimes gets angry and yells at her when she tries to talk to him." Megan said. Peter looks at Kat concerned, but she's putting up a brave front.  
"Well, if he is trying to attack whoever it is he's talking about, you guys need to be careful. Especially on the quest this week." Peter thinks for a moment. " Maybe I should send Roger instead of Jeff to help out. I don't want him accidentally hurting one of you."  
"Peter," Megan said, "I don't think Jack will be a problem, besides we can handle it. Right kat?" megan asked. Kat nodded, but she wasn't sure. Jack was becoming more and more angry not less. It made Kat nervous thinking about it.  
"all right. But if either of you need me or Jack gets any worse let me know." They both agreed.  
  
(Two days later. Kat, Megan and Jeff are on the quest with the Trackers. Kat has tried to talk to jack many times, but with out much success. She's given up for the time being on talking to Jack. They've made camp for the night and are sitting around the campfire talking.)  
"I leave for Yale, in another month and a half. I can't wait." Kat said to Megan.  
"You're going to Yale?" A voice said from behind Kat. Kat and Megan turned to see Jack.  
"Yes." Kat said a little shocked. Megan realizing this would be a good chance for Kat to talk to Jack, got up and left them alone.  
Jack got a far a way look in his eyes. "That's where I was going to go. I was going to major in law, so I could join my dad's practice." He sat down next to Kat.  
"What are you going to major in?" He asked.  
"I'm thinking of majoring in psychology."   
"Wow, that's a great field. You can help a lot of people with a degree like that."  
'I know. That's what I want."  
"Maybe one day you'll figure out how to help me." He said, looking over at her.  
"I can help you, if you tell me what's wrong." He turned away from her then. "They wouldn't want me to tell you."  
"Jack, I only worry about what you want and need. If you want to tell me, tell me. Don't worry about them." Jack turned back to her. This time he was angry.  
"You don't care about them?" He shouted, drawing the attention of the other campers. Kat jumped at the anger in his voice. "They made me who I am and you don't care about them.?" He picked up a full water bottle and threw it.   
"Ow." Kat heard someone cry. Turing she saw Megan doubled over. The water bottle had hit her in the stomach. Jeff rushed to her side to see if she was all right. Kat turned back to Jack, worried that he might throw something else. But when she saw his face he looked as if he might cry. "I didn't mean to." He said quietly, his voice shaking. "It's just, they made me..."   
  
(The day after the quest. Peter has heard what has happened and wants to speak to Kat. Megan had taken a few days off because of the bruising the water bottle had caused. Roger has been asked to help Kat out until Megan comes back.)  
"Peter, I don't think he meant to. He just, he needs help." Kat argued. She'd been arguing with Peter for half an hour about the incident.  
"Kat he injured a counselor. You guys had had reservations about him before. I think we should remove him from your group. Put him with somebody who can deal with his outbursts."  
"Peter, I'm just beginning to get through to him."  
"Well, somebody else can get through to him. I don't want you to get hurt."  
"Look Roger is helping me now. If I have a problem he can help me."  
"Kat... I don't know."  
"Look Peter just give me a few days to talk to him alright. If in a week I haven't gotten anywhere with him. You can take him out of my group."  
"Are you sure about this?" Peter asks, looking Kat directly in the eye.  
"Look Peter, I'm not going to tel you that his outburts don't worry me, but I really think I can reach him." She says not backing down.  
"All right, but if you need anything or anything happens, youtell me right away. Got it?" Kat nodded.  
(Later that night. Kat goes to talk to Jack. She finds him sitting outside the cafeteria by himself.)  
"Jack?" She calls walking across the campus. " Jack it's me Kat." He's staring at the sky and talking to himself.  
"Jack."  
"I want you to leave me alone." He says.   
"Jack I can't do that."  
"They want to help me." He says, continuing to look into the night sky. Kat suddenly realizes he is not talking to her.  
"Jack?" She says stepping closer. "Jack?" She says this time touching his arm when she says it. He jumps.   
"Kat, I didn't hear you." He says.  
"Jack, who were you talking to?" She says stepping up next to him.  
"I shouldn't tell you." He says quietly. "They wouldn't like that."  
"Who your parents?"   
"No. Them." He said. Staring at the sky. "They run my life Kat. They made me give up everything." He says quietly. Then suddenly he became angry. " I hate them! I have to make them stop."  
"How are you going to make them stop?" Kat asked calmly. Jack didn't answer her. He just turned and headed back towards his cabin.  
Kat was worried. She left Jack and went looking for Peter. She had to tell him what she'd discovered about Jack.  
(End of flashbacks)  



	8. A Season for Change part 7

A season for change: part seven  
(A while later. Kat and Hank managed to make it on to campus unseen by any of the others. They are not avoiding them, but Kat wants to tell Hank alone. She also wants time to see how she'll react to seeing the place after what had happened.)  
Kat and Hank walk through the cafeteria. Most of the groups are in therapy and it's about two hours before lunch, so they didn't have to worry about running into anyone. Kat and Hank walk towards the kitchen. When they reach the doorway, Kat stops suddenly. She is transported back a month.   
Kat had gone to the administration building looking for Peter. She knew it was late, but many times he stayed late to work on paperwork. She also knew it was unlikely, but she'd promised to tell him. She had to tell him what she'd discovered about Jack. She checked his office, but he wasn't there. Kat sighed she'd have to wait until the next morning to tell him. She was headed out when Jeff came into the building.   
"Kat, just the person I was looking for." Jeff said.  
"What is it, Jeff?" She had asked.  
"Jack's missing, he's not in his cabin." Kat sighed. This couldn't be good.   
"Jeff, go get Roger, he can help us search." Kat said.  
Kat headed for the cafeteria. That's where she'd seen him last. Kat flipped the light switch on to the cafeteria and walked to the kitchen. She stopped in the doorway when she spotted Jack.  
Suddenly Kat turned around. " I can't do this Hank. I'm not ready."  
Hank looked at her. " Kat, you're ready. Just tell me what happened."  
"I don't want to, besides you were there." She says turning on him. " You were there. You saw him, just like I did."  
"Kat, your right. I did see him, but I only know what I saw. I was only there for a few minutes before they took him away. Tell me what happened."  
Kat shook her head. Not wanting to remember. Hank now loses his temper. "You're the one who said Jack was sick. That he shouldn't be punished for what happened that he needed help. So tell me why that is."  
Kat turns back to the kitchen, again going back to that night.  
Jack was laying on the floor crying. There was a knife on the floor and he had a small gash on his arm. Kat had shuddered. She knew Jack had been a cutter, but his parents had said he hadn't cut in months when they'd brought him in.  
"Jack?" Kat had said, leaning down to see the boy. " Are you OK?"  
The boy didn't even seem to see her. " I don't deserve this. What did I do to you?" He cried.   
"Jack, its Kat." She'd said again a little louder trying to snap him out of it. " I'm here. Talk to me."  
"Your all the same, your all the same." He yelled, still not acknowledging Kat. "You all think I deserve this. You all think I need help." He cried standing up.  
Kat noticed he was shaking. " Jack, Jack. Who are you arguing with?" Kat asked, but she still got no response from Jack. She reached over taking his arm. Jack turned around swinging. Kat managed to duck his first few punches, but one caught her squarely on the jaw. The next thing she knew, Kat was flailing backwards. She hit the counter with a loud crash and sunk to the floor the wind knocked out of her.   
"I hate you!" Jack cried and headed for the door. But Roger who had heard the noise was in the doorway. Roger reached for Jack, but Jack sidestepped him, running around the counter and grabbing Kat by the arm. He twisted her arm up behind her.   
"Let her go, Jack." Roger had said. Trying to calm the boy down.  
"I have to make them stop. You have to stop." He said jerking on Kat's arm and making her wince.   
"Jack, we can't make them stop, unless you tell us who they are." Roger said. "Now just let Kat go and we'll talk about it."  
"Do what he says Jack." Kat had huffed.  
"We won't hurt you, we just want to help you." Roger added.  
"You all want to hurt me. You all think you know what's best. My parents, my friends." Jack who had already been crying began to cry harder. " You don't know. I want them to go away. I want them to leave me alone. I want her to leave me alone." With that he again shoved Kat. This time though, Roger caught her before she hit anything.   
"You OK?" He asked.  
"I think so." She said breathing hard. Roger got up and headed for Jack who had grabbed the knife and was sitting in the corner of the room.  
"I just want them to go away. I told you I would make them go away." Jack said holding the knife over his wrist. "I don't want to listen to them. STOP TALKING TO ME." He cried his voice cracking from having screamed so much. Roger and Kat looked at each other. Kat was certain now that Jack was dillusional. It explained much of his behavior over the last month. The extreme mood swings, talking to himself, the sudden outbursts.   
"Jack, this isn't the way out." Roger said taking a step forward.   
"Get away from me. I told you I had a way to make them stop." He said looking at Kat and moving the knife closer to his wrist. "They'll stop now. They'll listen to me." He looked up. "You'll listen to me now, won't you? You'll have to, because I control you now, not the other way around." He moved the knife even closer to his wrist.  
"Don't!" Kat cried. "Jack! Jack it's me Kat." She said desperately trying to get through to him. "I'm not one of them. I really can help. Just talk to me."  
Jack looked at her, but then suddenly he shook his head and began to cry harder. " Go away!" He yelled again. "I want them to go away." He kicked the trashcan across the room. Roger intercepted it and pushed it behind him and Kat.  
"Kat try to get him to talk to you about something. He seemed to respond to you." Roger said. Kat gave him a questioning look. As if to say talk about what? "Talk about that quest you guys went on." Roger said to Kat. Kat nodded and turned towards Jack.  
"Jack? Jack, do you remember that quest we went on." Jack looked up at her. " Yea, you'd said it was going to be your first camp out." Kat said evenly taking a step forward. "Remember. You were so happy. You said you wanted to write home about it." Jack put his hand to his head. "Jack, do you remember? We went on the quest and that's when you found out I went to Yale. We talked about our majors." She paused taking another step forward. "And how I was leaving soon." She took another step.   
"Careful Kat." Roger said from behind her. As the boy kicked something else across the room. Kat nodded.  
"And how you wanted to go to Yale too?" Jack started sniffling.  
"Do you remember?" She asked and kneeled beside him. He looked up at her.  
"I remember." He said quietly.  
"Do you remember me telling you about my time here at Horizon? It wasn't during the quest, but..." Her voice trailed off as he nodded.  
"You said Peter really helped you." He said sniffling and wiped his eyes with his shirt.  
"That's right." She took a deep breath, praying that this worked. " Jack. I want to help you."  
He looked up at her. And staring right into her eyes asked, "You want to help me?"  
Kat nodded. " I do. But I need you to put the knife down."  
Jack looked down at his hand, as if just realizing he had one. He stared at the knife. "I want it to stop." He said crying again.  
"It will Jack. You got to believe me it will. But first you have to put down the knife." Kat looked at him expectantly. She waited. Watching him debate.   
Jack closed his eyes. He wanted the voices to stop. If only he could believe they would. " Put down the knife, Jack. I'm begging you. Please, put down the knife." Kat said choking on tears.   
He made up his mind. He opened his hand and the knife fell to the floor with a clatter. Roger quickly stepped forward removing the knife from its fallen place. A guy from the police station, who had been in the doorway, came over and helped Jack out of the room. Roger followed them.   
Kat's legs suddenly gave way and she slumped back against the wall sobbing. Peter came into the kitchen and knelt beside her. He wrapped his arms around her and held her as she cried.   
"Hank, Jack needed help. I know that during the weeks I worked with him, I was scared and upset, but I couldn't press charges against him. He needed help and now he'll get it." She said "He didn't know what he was doing. He was dillusional and scared. He just wanted help. I could have sent him to juvie, made him pay for harming me and scaring me, but he needed help." She turns to face Hank. "I know that all you wanted to do was protect me and help me be safe. I know that since we waited so long to talk, that you didn't have all the facts of what happened. But Jack was dillusional and he's now getting help." She pauses for a moment. " Because of me. I helped him Jack. I decided to counsel at Horizon to give back. And that's what I did."  
Hank hugs her. Then kisses her forehead. "I'm sorry I didn't listen to you until now. I could have saved us both some time. But when I saw him grab you like that and had seen him with the knife earlier... I was scared." He looks her in the eyes and says, "Kat, your one of the best things that has ever happened to me and I love you. And I think you made the right choice in choosing to help Jack, instead of giving up on him." Kat smiled and then leaned up and kissed him.  
"You know, those two are almost as bad as Scott and Shelby." The couple broke apart at the sound of Daisy's voice. Hank turned around, keeping one arm around Kat. Before him and Kat stood the cliffhangers, who were grinning widely at seeing Kat, and having caught her and Hank together.  
"So how much did you guys hear?" Kat asked.  
"I love you, you made the right choice, hug hug, kiss kiss." Shelby said sarcastically.  
"Yea, just enough to know that our beloved Kat is OK." Daisy added and walked over and gave Kat a hug. The other cliffhangers followed.   
"You guys on kitchen duty?" Kat asked after having hugged and greeted them. They nodded and as the other cliffhangers began their work in the kitchen Kat proceeded to tell them about college and life after Horizon.  
(On the other side of the cafeteria, Peter and Sophie are standing side by side, watching the cliffhangers talk.)  
"Looks like Kat's going to be OK." Sophie says.  
"Looks like they'll all be OK." Peter replies.  
"Things have changed a lot over the last few months." Sophie says putting her arms around Peter. Indicating that one of the things that has changed is their relationship.  
"I guess they have." He says and kisses her. He pulls back, "Maybe it's just that time of year."  
"Autumn always seems to bring about change."  
"Well, Sophie Becker, maybe it's just the season."  
"Yea, a season for change." She says and rolls her eyes, but then she kisses him.  
(Closing credits)  
Next time on Higher Ground Fan Fic - "Father of Mine" - Daisy's father comes for a visit. Sara Hannington shows up and everyone wonders how somebody so normal, could end up in a place like Horizon. Peter names a scholarship in his father's name.  



	9. Father Of Mine Part 1

Disclaimer I own only a few characters. So on and so forth.  
Reviews are greatly appreciated even if negative, I love to hear what you have to say, just try not to be brutal.  
  
Father of Mine part 1  
I will permit no man to narrow and degrade my soul by making me hate him."  
--Booker T. Washington--   
  
(Daisy is sitting in Peter's office. Peter is at his desk; Daisy is sitting across from him. Peter has just informed her, that her father would be coming up that weekend.)  
"Why?" She asks, in her usual sarcastic I don't care tone. Peter is not surprised by her reaction.  
"Daisy, he wants to see you." Peter pauses for a moment. "He says he thinks it's time the two of you repair your relationship."  
Daisy scoffs. "Well, that's a laugh. Since he's always tried so hard to be a good father to me, I guess this will just be one more thing he can add to his resume for father of the year." She says sarcastically.  
"Daisy, he's willing to try."  
Daisy looks away. "Try, Peter." She looks back to him with a steely gaze. "Maybe I'm just not ready to try yet."  
"Daisy, I can understand your reservations, but I think this could actually be a good thing. You've changed in your time since you came; maybe he's changed too. It's been months since you two saw each other."  
"It's been months all right. Months since my mother's death, months since we've spoken, months since...months since everything." She pauses, trying to control her anger. "I don't want to see him."   
"Daisy, do you regret going to your mother's funeral?" Daisy's head jerks up, a little shocked at the question, but angry also. He gives her an expectant look.  
She takes a deep breath. "No." She says answers begrudgingly.  
"Remember, you didn't want to do that. But you went and you don't regret it, so maybe this isn't such a bad idea either." He says walking around the desk and sitting on the edge of it. "Give it a try."  
"Fine. If he wants to come up here, then let him, but don't think I'm going to just forgive and forget." She says and stands up and heads for the door. "And when this doesn't work out, remember that I didn't want to do this in the first place." With that Daisy walks out the door, brushing by Sophie who was headed in.  
"What was that all about?" Sophie asks, walking over to him.  
"Her Dad's coming for a visit."  
"When?"  
"He'll be here Friday."  
"Peter, that's tomorrow. That doesn't exactly give her much time to prepare."  
"That might be for the best. If Daisy was prepared, her father may never make it out of the car."   
Sophie gives him a look, then says, "Can you really blame her? After some of the stories she's told in-group..." Sophie shakes her head. "She's really angry at him."  
Peter nods, "Well," He says and changes the topic, "Not only do we have to deal with Daisy's dad visiting, but we have a new admit today and she's in your group."  
"When she come in?"  
"Actually she's been in. Megan gave her the talk, she's had her medical exam and she's probably now getting the grand tour."  
"What's her story?"  
Peter hands her the file. "Her names Sara Hannington, she's almost sixteen. Her grades are good, her behavior is impeccable and her good attitude is impressive. Her dad is a successful banker; her mom is a housewife. Sara has received everything she needs. The problem though is that she has trouble adjusting. At least that's what her mom says. Her mom says they moved to Colorado from Pennsylvania last year. Sara never really adjusted to life there and Sara's brother just moved away. Her mom thinks her recent, unusual behavior might be because of that. That's what's her mom says."  
"That's it? We know nothing about her other then she has adjustment problems."  
"Well, you know parents and teens, Sophie. They often ignore the truth. I presume there's more to it then that. Remember, Shelby was just a habitual runaway and you know her story." Sophie nods, seeing his point.  
"Well, when do I get to meet her?"  
"The cliffhangers have group in half an hour. That will give you time to talk to her before. She's probably in the girls dorm by now." Sophie nods.   
"Have you met her yet?" Sophie asks Peter. He bods. "What is she like?" Sophie asks.  
"Well, as I said before Megan gave her the talk. I met her briefly, but she seemed to be OK. She said goodbye to her mom even. But that's all she said to her mom. She introduced herself to me and then her and Megan went to get her settled."  
"So she's nice, but cold."  
"That was my first judgment, but from what Megan told me, she seemed friendly and upbeat. Maybe her mom just made her tense."  
"Well, I'll just go meet her for myself." She sighs. "Don't have much to go on, but I've had less to work with." With that she heads out the door.  
  
(The girl's dorm a few minutes later. The other cliffhangers are still in class.)  
Sophie knocks a few times and waits for a response. "Hello." She calls.  
"Oh, hey." A girl's voice responded. "Come on in."  
Sophie walked around the corner. On a bed in the middle of the room sat a tall browned haired girl. Sophie quickly noted the girl had managed to put most of her stuff away already. She'd also put pictures, Sophie presumed they were her family, out on her nightstand. The girl had a book open in front of her. It was a leather bound notebook and it looked as though the girl had been writing in it. When Sara noticed Sophie looking at the book, she quickly shut it and put it on her shelf.  
"Hi. I'm Sara Hannington." The girl said standing up and putting her hand out for Sophie to shake. Sophie was a bit taken aback. Most newbie's weren't so open.   
"Hi, I'm Sophie Becker." Sophie answered trying to mask her shock and shaking the girl's hand. "I'm the cliffhangers counselor. That's the group you've been assigned to."  
"Yea, that Megan girl told me that." Sara said flopping back down onto the bed.  
Sophie sat down on the bed across from her. "Um, your mom didn't really tell us much about why you're here. You want to fill me in?"  
Sara looked at Sophie and then back down at the bed. "Well, my family moved last year and I just never really managed to fit in where I live now. And since my brother moved away..." Her voiced trailed off. It was a good answer. It even sounded real to Sara and she knew it was a lie. She'd actually practiced how she'd say it. She wanted to have just the right amount of sadness, but not enough to make her have to breakdown to be convincing. Sara had learned to make herself cry on que, but she didn't like to.   
"How did your brother's move, make you feel?" Sophie asked.  
Sara was thrown by the question. She knew they'd ask, but she hadn't presumed it be her first day. " Well, " She said, "My brother, Brett, and I were always close, even though he's three years older then me. I was really sad." At least the last line was true, Sara thought to herself. She had been sad when Brett left. At least when he was around her parents would yell at him too. She clenched her teeth in anger, remembering all the arguments her and her parents had had. Some of them would last for hours. "Can we just not talk about this?" Sara asked suddenly angry. She hadn't expected that the lie would make her think of what had really happened. Sara looked at Sophie, who seemed to be making a mental note of the fact that she'd lost her temper talking about her brother.   
"We can quit talking about it, for now." Sophie said and then stood. "The cliffhangers, including you, have group in fifteen minutes. It's in the lodge on the other side of campus." She said and then headed for the door. She turned back around when she reached the doorway. "Sara, if you need to talk, or if you just want to talk, I'm always here for you."   
Sara nodded and then watched Sophie walk out the door. She waited a few minutes to make she was gone and then let out a scream. How could she have gotten angry on her first day? This was going to be harder then she thought. But she only had to keep it up for a few months. Until her mom convinced her dad that Sara would be OK. Then Sara could leave this place and do what she'd wanted to do in the first place. She wanted to go to Matt's. He'd agreed to let her move in and besides in a few years she'd be eighteen and then it would be OK for the two of them to be together.   
Sara sighed. She could think about what she wanted to do after she got out of this hell whole later. Right now she had to worry about how to get through group. She stood up and walked into the bathroom. Looking in the mirror she smiled her biggest and brightest smile.   
"Hello, I'm Sara Hannington." She said. No, that wouldn't work. Too uniform.   
"Hi, I'm Sara, pleased to meet you." She thought for a moment then groaned. It's completely fake, she thought.   
"Hi, I'm Sara." She said. This time she tries it with a bit less of a smile, and a bit of attitude. No, she thought, if I go with attitude they'll just think I've got problems. And since I don't want to deal with them they can't know.   
"Hi, I'm Sara." She said with a small smile. Yes, that's it. The perfect look to meet the other cliffhangers. So she now knew how to greet them, but how did she get through group? She took a deep breath.   
"Well," She said to herself, "If I'm going to make it through group, I'll just have to not talk." Talking had been what had made her angry in the first place. "But if I don't talk, they'll think I have a problem. Damn!" She said. "Well, I guess I'll just have to really watch myself. I've been acting like I don't have a problem for years, why should this be any different?" She asked herself. But if it wasn't any different then why did you get mad? A little voice inside her head asked.   
"I can't do this." She said to herself. "I've done it too long and now I've lost my touch." She said panicked. They couldn't find out. "No, no, calm done." She said to herself. " I'll be fine. I'll be fine once I greet them. Then I'll know that I can deal with it. Besides anything I say today can be passed off as me being new. I can do this." She said trying to convince herself. "I have to remain in control." She looked up into the mirror. "I CAN DO THIS." She said to herself, pronouncing each word slowly and deliberately. "I don't have a problem." She said with a straight face. See it sounded convincing; it looked convincing. Now all she had to do was convince them.   
Sara looked into the mirror. "Hi, I'm Sara. I don't have a problem." She smiled to herself. "Who would have thought all those acting classes Father made me go to, would actually pay off." With that she turned and headed off to the lodge for group.  



	10. Father Of Mine Part 2

All disclaimers apply.  
Just a little side note, I know I've been doing short entries and this story is starting out slow, but it does get better soon. I've been working really long shifts so I've been breaking it up into smaller sections. Sorry for the inconvenience and I hope you all continue to read, because it does it get better.  
  
Father of Mine Part two  
(Sara walks into the lodge. In the middle of the room there are several chairs set up into a circle. Sophie is standing in the middle of the circle. Several kids, who Sara presumes are the other cliffhangers, are in the chairs. There is one chair left open. It is next to a skinny brown haired boy, and a brown haired girl. Sophie is getting ready to call the group to order. She notices Sara standing in the doorway surveying the group.)  
"Sara." Sophie calls and the other cliffhangers turn to check out the new girl. "Why don't you join us? You can sit over there." She says pointing to the empty chair. "Between Daisy and Ezra." Sara nods and walks confidently over to the chair and sits down.  
"Why don't we all introduce ourselves?" Peter says. He is sitting in a chair opposite of Sara's. He's come to see how his new admit is doing and to see if he can learn more about her and why she's her. Sophie has already filled him in on her and Sara's earlier conversation.  
"I'm Ezra." The brown haired guy next to her said.  
"I'm Auggie." A Latino boy from the other side of the circle said.  
"I'm Julliette." Said a brown haired girl, who was sitting next to Auggie.  
"I'm Scott." A blonde boy said.  
"I'm Shelby." A blonde haired girl, who was sitting next to him said.  
"I'm Trouble." A brown haired boy said. He got a look from Peter and said,   
"Names David. And this," He said pointing at the brown haired girl next to her, " Is my beloved Daisy."  
"I'm not your beloved anything." Daisy said angrily. David started to make another comment, but Daisy shut him up with a steely look. This shocked the group. They were used to Daisy and David arguing, but Daisy was being angrier then usual. "Why don't we go ahead and start group?" Sophie said trying to ease some of the tension. She walked over and sat down next to Peter. "Anybody have any issues they'd like to address?" She asked. Everyone looked at each other, not sure what to discuss.  
"What's up with Daisy?" David finally asked. Peter was surprised. Even though David had been here for almost four months, he still wasn't very open with the group.  
"Daisy would you care to answer?" Sophie asked.  
Daisy looked at David, with cold hard eyes. "Well," She began sarcastically, "If you must know. My father," she said the word with much disdain, "Is coming for a visit."  
"Are you OK with that?" Shelby asked, suddenly concerned for her friend. Daisy started to make a sarcastic comment, but caught Shelby's eyes. She and Shelby stared at each other for a moment. Shelby had been there for her when her mother died, she knew her and her father had had words. Daisy looked away, but instead of Shelby's concerned face, she looked right into Ezra's. She quickly looked down at her hands, knowing it was the only way she could keep her emotions stable.  
"I don't want to see him." She said evenly.  
"Why not?" Julliette asked, she paused for a moment thinking. "I haven't seen my dad in a long time and I'd love to see him." She said quietly.  
"Yes, but your father isn't an abusive alcoholic, now is he?" Daisy shot back sarcastically.   
"No, but mine's a real pain the..." David said, but was cut off by a look from Peter. "I just meant he's really hard to deal with." David said sarcastically.  
"And at least your dad's trying." Scott said.  
"Trying what? To repair his relationship with his little girl? I'm not his little girl any more. He's already made that quite clear." Daisy said angrily, but Shelby and the others could tell she was fighting back tears. Daisy then stood and headed out of the lodge. Shelby stood and went after her while the others watched in silence.   
Shelby jogged down the steps of the lodge. She could see Daisy ahead of her. "Hey Daisy, wait up." Shelby called after her.  
Daisy stopped and turned around, facing Shelby. "Look, I'm just not thrilled about seeing daddy. Can't you just leave me alone?" Daisy says, turning her anger on Shelby.   
"Like you ever left me alone?" Shelby answered sarcastically. Then she softened her tome. "Daisy remember, we all have problems with our parents. I know how angry you are because of what he did to you. I know, I've been there." Shelby says.  
Daisy looks at the ground, she knows Shelby is right. "Why does he have to come? Wasn't seeing him at my mother's funeral enough?" Daisy asks fighting back tears.   
"You have to face him sometime." Shelby says, knowing how much her friend is hurting.  
"I know." Daisy says, "But I hate him so much." She says angry again.  
"So tell him."  
"No. I won't tell him and I don't want to see him. If he wants to try to repair this relationship, then fine let him, but I'm not going to help him." Daisy shouts. With that she heads for the girls cabin. Shelby doesn't try to follow.  
(The next morning in the girl's cabin. Shelby, Jules and Sara are all lying on their beds, watching Daisy. Daisy knows they're watching and has been ignoring them for awhile now, but finally she gives up.)  
"What?" She asks in an angry tone.  
"Well, your dad will be here soon." Julliette says.  
"Well, then daddy, will be here soon." Daisy says sarcastically and continues to brush her hair.  
Just then Sophie came into the cabin. "Daisy, your dad's here."   
"And?" She says evenly.  
Sophie gives her a look. Then comes over and sits down on the edge of Daisy's bed. "I know you don't want to see him."  
"What gave you that idea?" Daisy says, setting the hairbrush down on the table next to her.  
"Daisy, he's willing to try. Give him a chance." Sophie says encouragingly. Daisy seethes, then begrudgingly stands.  
"Might as well get it over with." She says and heads out the door. Sophie sighs and then stands and follows her.  



	11. Father Of Mine Part 3

Sorry to all of you people who got cut off in part two, what happened is I thought of a scene in the middle of the other one. Wrote it out and cut and pasted it at the bottom of part two and forgot to take it out before I saved it so I have reposted part two and now here is part three. I apologize for any misleading and confusion I have caused.  
  
Father of Mine part 3  
(Peter's office. Daisy is sitting in a chair. Her father is sitting across from her on the couch and Peter is at his desk. The two have been in a face of for about ten minutes. Peter has been trying to get them to talk, but neither is doing very well.)  
"OK," Peter says, determined to at least have the two say something to each other, "Mr. Liponosky, you said you wanted to try to work out your relationship with your daughter why don't you tell her why."  
Mr. L, thinks for a moment and then looks at his daughter. "I've been out of rehab for two months. Part of what I learned there, was that you need to make amends. I decided it was time for the two of us to make amends."  
"Amends, daddy," Daisy says looking up at her father, "Did you make amends with mother?" Mr. L, looks like he's been slapped. "Maybe you'd like to make amends with the bottle, daddy." She says the word as though it's poison.  
"I haven't had a drink in several months."  
"Do you think that makes up for everything?" Daisy asked.  
"I know it doesn't take away all the things that happened Daisy, but I'm sorry."  
"Your sorry?" She says, fighting back tears. "Sorry for what, Daddy? Sorry that you weren't ever a real dad to me? Sorry that mom..." Daisy shook her head. She couldn't cry now, not in front of him. "Sorry you had me? Sorry I was there to interrupt your addiction." Her voice has raised until she is shouting. "Your sorry all right." With that Daisy storms past Peter and out of the administration building.  
"I'm trying to do the right thing here." Her father says, more to himself then to Peter, after watching his daughter walk away.  
"Mr. Liponowsky, I know your trying, but Daisy is very angry. She's trying to deal with a lot of emotions right now. You coming here reminds her of a lot of pain that she doesn't like to share."  
"Daisy's mother was very much the same way." He said quietly. "That's why she became an alcoholic."  
(Daisy storms into the girls cabin, glad the rest are in class, she doesn't want to deal with them.)  
"He's trying." She says to herself. "Trying to make me forgive him." She continues angrily. "I won't." As she talks to herself, she begins pacing, trying to burn off her anger. "Why doesn't he leave, why did he have to come here?" She continues pacing. " I should have offed him when I had the chance." She picks up a glass cat that's sitting on Julliette's nightstand and throws it across the room. It hits the wall shattering into tiny pieces.   
Flashback  
(a bottle breaks against the wall, it's clear Daisy is the one who threw it. She stands in the kitchen at home. In front of her is her father and Daisy is dressed in normal clothing, not as a goth. Her mother is also there.)  
"Your drunk, daddy." Daisy says sadly, but not shockingly.  
"I'm not drunk. I was just relaxing after work." He says.  
"You were supposed to come to my choir concert." She says accusingly.  
"Daisy, I work very hard to support you and your mother, sometimes I need to relax."  
"Oh, I'm sorry, daddy, I didn't realize I was in your way." Daisy says and runs out of the kitchen and up to her room.   
She slams her bedroom door behind her. For as long as she could remember her father had been drinking, but he was now turning into a alcoholic. More and more he was missing her choir concerts, her school functions and other things all because he was drunk. Her mother had even been picking her up from school drunk lately. She was scared to get into a car with her.   
"Well, if they don't care about me," Daisy said to herself, "Then I won't care about them." She says and pauses by her bed. It had hurt so much when he hadn't shown to the concert. Used to her mother would at least come, after all she had taught her to sing, but everything had gotten so much worse. "I will never drink." Daisy vowed to herself. "And I will never, let them see how much this hurts me." With that she layed down on her bed and cried.  
End of Flashback.  
"I always was in your way, daddy." Daisy says staring at the broken cat. "But this time, I refuse to be hurt by you."  
(Next scene. It's of the cliffhangers in class, Sara included. Jeff is impressed with Sara's knowledge, but surprised she's spoken up so much on her first day.)  
'ok, you guys, your previous essays were good, but it's time for another one." Jeff said, and the class groaned.   
"Jeff, man," Auggie says, "All we been doin is lately is essays."  
"Yea, can't we do something else?" Julliette asks, knowing how much Auggie hates to write essays. He throws her an appreciative smile.  
Jeff thinks for a moment, knowing they had been doing a lot of essays lately. "All right, if you guys don't want to do the essay, then you don't have to." The class looks at him in disbeleif.  
"Jeff, are you serious?" Scott asks.  
"I'm serious," He says and the class is thrilled by the fact they don't have to do the essay, "But, " He says, the class groaning now.  
"Should have known there would be a catch." Shelby said.  
"But, you will have to do a replacement assignment." Jeff says.  
"Like what?" Sara asks eagerly.  
"Well, you guys decide." Jeff answered. "Each of you will come up with your own assignment."  
"All right!" Ezra says. The class shoots him dirty looks, but then he says, "No assignment for me." The rest of the class nod in agreement, they'd assign themselves no homework.  
"No, you have to actually do an assignment." Jeff said, earning more groans from the class. "But you can do a presentation, a story, a mural, or the original idea of an essay. It's up to you. But it must not break any of Horizon's rules. And you have to work with in this theme," He turns to the black board and writes for a few moments. He turns around and reads it, "'In spite of everything, I still believe that all people are good at heart.' You project must fit under this theme. The assignment is due Monday. Class dismissed." There are many groans and complaints to the assignment as the class leaves.  
"This should be interesting." Sara thinks to herself. "There assignments are so dorky, maybe I'll just write the essay." She continues thinking for a moment. "Better yet, I'll just make a list of all the people who prove Ann Franks quote is wrong. Starting with my parents." With these thoughts she walks out of the classroom and heads to the dorms.  
( Shortly after the scene between Daisy and her father, Peter is sitting in his office. Daisy's dad has left to go back to his hotel. He said he would be back that night to talk to his daughter. Sophie enters the office.)  
"I take it things didn't go well between Daisy and her father?" Sophie asks after seeing the look on his face.  
"Well, she spoke to him. But then she ran out. I don't know whether it's progress or not." Peter says concerned.  
"Think they'll ever really talk?" She asks sitting down across from Peter. "A lot of damage has been done."  
"I'm not sure. He's willing to try, but Daisy..." He pauses, "She just isn't ready to forgive him yet."  
"Well, at least there talking. Maybe it's a start." Sophie says hopefully.  
"It's more of arguing." He sighs, "And we go round two after dinner."  
"He's coming back?" Sophie asks surprised. "He's got nerve."  
"Yea, well we'll see what happens."  
(Right before dinner, the girls are walking to the cafeteria. Daisy had cleaned up the cat she broke. She never gave the others an explanation.)  
"So," Shelby asks, falling into step with Daisy, "How did things go with you and your dad?"  
"It was grand reunion." Daisy answered. " We laughed, we cried, we argued. Everything you'd expect when an alcoholic father and his deranged daughter reunite." With that Daisy quickens her step and pushes ahead of the group so she won't be bothered.  
(Dinner is over. Daisy is in Peter's office, so is her father.)  
"Well, Daddy. Didn't exactly think you'd come back here tonight." Daisy said.  
"Daisy," He says and sighs. "I really do want to try and work things out." Daisy just ignores him.  
"Peter, I have group." Daisy says.  
Peter sighs, helplessly. "Daisy, your dad's trying here. Can't you at least stay and talk to him?"  
"I talked to him earlier, why should I talk to him again?" She answered.  
"You know, Mr. Scarbrow," Her dad said "If Daisy has group, maybe I could sit in on it?" Her father said. This shocked both Daisy and Peter.  
"I don't think..." Peter began.  
"That's a great idea, Daddy." Daisy says, thinking that once her father sits in on group he'll not come back.  
"Um..." Peter fumbles for an excuse, "If you both want to, then I guess it's a good idea."  



	12. Father Of Mine Part 4

Father of mine part four  
(The cliffhangers are in-group. Daisy and her dad are present.)  
"Ok, Cliffhangers," Sophie says, trying hard to figure out why Daisy had agreed to let her father come to group. Maybe there was a chance she'd forgive him. "Let's start by saying how were feeling and why." She turns to Auggie who is next to her. " Auggie?"  
"Well, I'm feeling happy, because I don't have to write an essay."  
"I feel good, "Julliette says, "Because I am who I am."  
"I feel worried, for my friend." Shelby says, drawling a look from Daisy, who had been watching her father since the two sat down.  
"I feel energetic, because it's fall and I remember playing football on days like this." Scott says.  
"I feel lousy because I'm in group." David says.  
"I feel sad, because I miss my brother." Sara says.   
"I'm feeling torn, because I know soon I will know which parent I will end up living with." Ezra says.  
The group looked to Daisy who was watching her father. "I feel darkened," She said never taking her eyes off of him, "Because there are evil spirits among us." She smirks watching her fathers reaction.  
Sophie clears her throat, "Is there any issues any of you would like to address, before we continue?"  
Everyone just sort of looks at each other. Most want to know what's going on with Daisy and her dad, but are sort of afraid to ask. Tension is very high.  
"All right," Sophie says, trying to think of something to do. Everyone is thrown off by the presence of Daisy's dad and the tension between them.   
"Why don't we discuss forgiveness?" Peter says, knowing that Sophie is faltering due to the tension. "Who wants to start?" Peter asks, surveying the group. Sophie throws him a grateful look.  
"Well, it can be hard to forgive someone." Julliette says. "Especially if they've caused you harm."  
"It can be hard to forgive someone." Sara says, "Especially if they do something that is completely unforgivable." She says almost angrily, but she manages to rein in her anger.  
"I guess it depends on what you consider unforgivable." Ezra says.  
"It doesn't have to do with what you consider forgivable, if someone hurts you enough, you shouldn't have to forgive them." Shelby says.  
"But, by not forgiving them, you allow them to hurt you more." Sara says.   
"No by forgiving them, you allow them to hurt you more." Daisy says. The group looks to her.  
"You want to explain that, Daisy?" Peter asks.  
"If you don't forgive someone, then they can't hurt you." She says. "Once you allow them to come back into your life they will only hurt you. They've already proven they will by hurting you in the first place. If they had done nothing, you wouldn't have to forgive them."  
"Daisy, by not forgiving someone, you end up holding in anger and resentment. And you can turn that on others, or yourself who don't deserve it." Sophie says.  
"Well, as Sara said, 'If they do something unforgivable, then you shouldn't have to forgive them.'"  
"But by not forgiving someone you give them more power to hurt you." Sara said. "Yea," Shelby agreed. "hating someone can use up a lot of energy."  
"Yea, so can ducking punches." Daisy said quietly giving her father a cold steely glare. The group is sort of shocked by this statement and are quiet for a moment.  
"I think maybe I should leave." Her father said quietly to Peter, but the entire group heard.   
"Why, daddy can't handle the truth?" Daisy said, going back to her angry sarcastic manner.  
Her father stands wearily, "I know I made mistakes. If I could go back..."  
"You can't go back, daddy. You can't take away what happened."  
"Look, we both made mistakes that night." He says and pauses, thinking of his wife. "We all made mistakes."  
"Was I a mistake?" She asks.  
He looks hurt, " No. Daisy you were never a mistake, you were... you were my little girl."  
"Were being the keyword there daddy." She says standing up.  
"I didn't mean it like that."  
"Oh you didn't? Did you mean it when you told me that at my mother's funeral?" He looks at her confused. " Figures, you were propably too busy missing the bottle to pay much attention to your dead wife or your daughter." She is trying to control her anger. She turns and starts to walk away, knowing if she starts to tell him, she won't stop.   
"Daisy," Her father starts to say, but he is unsure of the words. She turns back and looks at him. For a moment sadness is on her face.   
She scoffs, sadly. "You never did know what to say to me did you? Even at mom's funeral. My own father could think of nothing to comfort me." She pauses. "That alone is unforgivable, but to also tell me that I was your little girl once." She looks at him in disgust and disbeleif. "I needed you. I wouldn't admit it, but I needed my father. My mother was dead and all I could get from you was that I was your little girl once." She is fighting back tears.  
"Those first few days," He says his voice thick with emotion, "I was so ... so" He searches for the right word. "I was distraught. I blamed myself and I wasn't thinking clearly. My wife had just died." He stops, sadness showing on his face. "I needed you too. But you showed up in that goth attire, I figured nothing had changed."   
Daisy looks at him. "You blame me daddy? What kind of father are you? You can't accept blame for anything can you? You always make excuses. Why couldn't you have comforted me? Why couldn't you just say I was your little girl, your daughter, instead of you were my little girl once?" She pauses. "I think mom died knowing she was a bad mother. I think she regretted not being able to care for me, but you daddy." She shakes her head. "You have no idea how bad a father you are. If you knew you never would have come here, let alone have asked me to try and repair our relationship."   
He looks hurt. "I know I've hurt you. And I know it will be hard for us to be able to repair our relationship, but I'd like to try." He pauses. "I do love you Daisy. In my own way."  
"Yea, you love me just like mother did. She loved the bottle more then she loved me, I guess you did too." She says angrily.  
"I know I hurt you and I'm sorry, but how do I make this up to you, because I want to."  
"You can't. I can't forgive you. I hate you both for what you did to me, I hate mother for what she did to me and I hate you for what you did to me." She shouts. "And I hate you for what you are doing to me."  
"I'm only trying to get to know you Daisy."  
"No your trying to force yourself upon me." She says and steps forward towards him. "All my life, all I wanted was parents. Parents who were loving and caring and came to my school assemblys and all that, but instead I got parents who were alcoholics, who wouldn't know love if it crawled in front of them. I wanted a father." She looks to him, "Instead I got you."  
"What about you?" He asks, finally getting angry. "Your not perfect, you made mistakes. You know I wanted a daughter who was respectable not one that was carted off to a school for delinquents."  
"We are not delinquents. The only reason most of us are here is because our parents are screwed up. You know, I only did what I did because you drove me to that! Had you not threatened to hit me, I wouldn't have defended myself." She shouts at him.   
"You know, I think I'm beginning to see why your mother and I always drank so much when you were home." He shouts back angrily.  
Daisy flinches have if having been slapped, but then rage overtakes her and she jumps at her father pushing him as hard as she can. Her father almost falls, but catches himself and heads towards her, hand raised as if he's going to hit her.  
"Go ahead hit me!" Daisy screams as Peter restrains her. " Show them all what kind of a father you really are!" Her father realizes that the cliffhangers have witnessed the entire scene. He pales at having lost his temper.   
"Let me go." She says and pulls away from Peter.   



	13. Father Of Mine Part 5

Father of Mine part 5  
(Peter's office after incident. Daisy is inside the office pacing. Peter and Sophie are talking with her father, trying to get him to leave. They have been trying for about fifteen minutes, but he doesn't want to leave until he talks to Daisy.)  
"Mr. Liponowsky, I think it would be best for everyone if you left for the night. It would give everyone a chance to calm down and think things through." Peter says.  
"I want to apologize to my daughter." Mr Liponowsky says.  
"Mr. Liponowsky, it really would be better if you left. I'm not sure Daisy can handle any more today." Sophie says.  
"No. I have to apologize." He says.  
Daisy who has been pacing inside the office and has heard every word, finally walks over and opens the door. Much to the surprise of all three adults. "Apologize for what?" Daisy says, she's angry, but no longer violent. "For what happened? It's gone on for years, Daddy, no need to apologize now. I'm used to it." With that she closes the door and walks away from her father. She walks to the couch and sits down. Peter and Sophie walk in a few moments later. Her father has reluctantly left. She watches him leave from the window.  
Sophie and Peter enter the office a few moments later. Daisy is still staring out the window after her father. "I see he finally left." She said in a tine that gave nothing away.  
"Daisy," Peter began, walking over to a chair across from the coach and sitting down in it, "I'm not condoning what your father did, but attacking him won't change anything. It won't make what happened go away."  
"Yea. Well him saying he's sorry won't make me forgive him." Daisy says still looking out the window.  
"Daisy, by staying angry at him, you only hurt yourself. You give him more control over you." Sophie says and sits down on the couch next to her. "What your father did was wrong, but he wants to try and make things better between you two. If you decide to give him a chance, things aren't going to change over night, but they will change." Daisy rolls her eyes to this.  
"Daisy, your anger towards your father, only hurts you. It interfers with your relationshio the two of you could have. Daisy you need your father, you said so yourself." Peter said.  
"No, I needed my father." Daisy says turning to Peter. "I needed him and he wasn't there for me. And it wasn't just once or twice, but every time. Every time, Peter. How can I expect that he's different now. He's been a drunk for most of my life, he's been sober for less then six months."   
"It is hard to trust someone who has hurt you Daisy. Especially if they've let you down a lot, but everyone makes mistakes. He's at least wanting to put forth effort to correct it." Sophie said.  
"Whose side are you guys on? He doesn't deserve to have me forgive him or to even give him a chance." Daisy says angrily.  
"We are on your side, Daisy." Peter said, reassuringly. "But we also think that you two working out some of your problems would be a benefit."  
"Peter, you saw him tonight. He says he's changed so much over the past few months, but the first time we get into an argument, there he is blaming me and wanting to abuse me. How can you think that's good?"  
Peter sighs, realizing he is getting nowhere. "Daisy, we're just saying to give it a shot, it's not like your moving home with him, your just going to talk, calmly and rationally. To give him a chance. That's it. Maybe not work so much on forgiveness this time, but maybe just hear what he has to say. Maybe that will be enough for now." He says. Daisy thinks for a moment, but is still unsure.  
"All right then," Peter says, " Why don't you think about it over night and we'll talk about it in the morning." Daisy nods and gets up to leave, she's almost out the door when Peter says, "Oh and Daisy, you're on kitchen duty for the rest of the week." Daisy sighs and walks out the door.  
"Wow, I didn't realize she was that angry." Sophie says after Daisy left. He looks at her. "Well, I did, but I never saw her act on it." Sophie says correcting herself.  
"Her father brings up painful memories of her life, her mother, her family, or lack of family. But if she could just give him a chance, they might have a chance of working things out. As it is now, her anger is preventing her. But maybe in time, they can come to an agreement." Peter says. Sophie nods. It is quiet for a few moments as they both think.  
"You know Sophie," Peter says changing the subject, "My father died several months ago, and I have yet to do anything that really honors him. I mean we never really got along, but we we're starting when he passed away." Peter says sadly. He is remembering times with his father. "I was thinking about calling Mark and seeing if he would help me set up a scholarship for Horizon students in my dad's name. I'm not sure of all the details yet, but you never know."  
"You could also consider naming the program you and Kat discussed after your father. That program will help a lot of kids. Especially one's like Kat, who leave a sheltered enviroment and then are practically thrown to the wolves." Sophie says. "I mean Kat's doing fine now, but I think her first month off campus would have been easier had she attended the program you want to create."  
Peter thinks about it and then nods. "Well, I have several ideas, but the goal is to do something in my father's name."  
(Daisy leaves Peters office and heads out of the administration office. But on the porch Shelby and Ezra are waiting.)  
Daisy looks at them. "We wanted to make sure you were OK." Ezra said.  
"Yea, group was sort of bad. And when your father left he didn't seem to happy." Shelby added. Daisy just stood there for a moment. "So are you OK?" Shelby asked.  
"Well," Daisy said and headed over to sit next to them. "Daddy apologized for what happened. Like that will make up for everything." Shelby gives her a sympathetic look.  
"Things could be worse." Ezra says trying to be helpful. Both Shelby and Daisy glare at him. He sort of backs away. "I think that's my cue to leave." He says standing up. "I'll see you guys tommorow." He heads off, then turns around. "Daisy I hope things work out between you and your dad." With that he leaves. Daisy scoffs.  
"I hope things work out too." She says sarcastically. "You know he just seems to think apologizing chamges everything. And everyone else seems to think so too. I mean Peter, Sophie, Julliette, Scott, all of them are telling me to give him another chance. I've given him many chances and every time, he's managed to screw it up, why should this time be any different?" Daisy says.  
"I don't know." Shelby says. "But I thought things would never be different with my step father." Shelby looks down at her hands. " I never thought I could tell anyone about what happened. I thought I could never turn him in, or get out of the life I was in, or fall in love. I didn't think I could do any of that. But I did. Scott and Sophie and Peter and you helped me do that." Shelby says looking at her. "You helped me do that, Daisy. And you managed to get through your mothers funeral. I mean you're a strong person. And I think you can do it. I know you can do it." Daisy looks up at Shelby with tears in her eyes.  
"I'm not strong enough to get through this. I can't forgive him Shelby. He's hurt me too much, too often."  
"Then don't forgive him." Shelby says softly. "Just listen to him. Just allow yourself to have peace."  
Daisy nods. "That's almost exactly the same thing Peter and Sophie told me." She pauses. "But I'm still not sure I'm ready. I'm still not sure. Every time I see him all I can think of is everything that's happened, of all those times he let me down and hurt me. It's like when I see him, it's not him, but everything he's done."  
Shelby nodded. "It's hard isn't it?" Shelby said. "But trust me, once you do it, you'll feel better about it. It will give you peace."   
"Maybe." Daisy says, staring off into the sky.  
Shelby stares at her friend, "Why don't we get back to the dorm. I have to work on that assignment of Jeff's."  
Daisy stands and so does Shelby. " You know what you're going to do yet?"  
"Well, we can do anything, as long as it fits his two requirements. I thought I might just make a collage or something. But I'll probably end up just writing the essay, it seems easier then coming up with an idea." Shelby answered as the two walked back to the girls dorm. They continues talking about the assignment until they arrived at the dorm. Shelby opens the door and Daisy starts to step inside, but then stops.  
"What is it?" Shelby asks.  
Daisy looks at her. "Just... thanks." Daisy answered and then walked into the dorm. Shelby smiles and follows her. 


	14. Father Of Mine Part 6

Father of mine part six  
(The following morning at breakfast. The cliffhangers, minus Daisy, since she is on kitchens, are sitting at a table in the cafeteria.)  
"Can you believe Daisy's father?" Julliette asks. " I can't believe he almost hit her." She says in disbelief.  
"Yea, well, some parents choose to do that, and worse to their children." Scott says.  
"Yea." Shelby said as, Peter and Sophie walked up to their table.  
"Yea, aren't parents great?" David asked sarcastically. "I mean they just do so much to us." He says. He then realizes that Peter and Sophie are there, "I meant for us." He says quickly. "How much parents do for us." The others laugh at what David said and Peter gives him a look. "What I say?" He asks putting an innocent look on his face.   
"What's up, Peter?" Auggie asks.  
"Well," Peter says. "Sophie and I have been talking and we realized you guys haven't really been on Quest in awhile..." The cliffhangers groaned, except for Sara since she didn't know what it was. "So, we thought we would schedule one for next weekend." Another groan from the cliffhangers.   
"Oh, come on you guys, it won't be that bad." Sophie said.   
"What's quest?" Sara asks.  
"It's when they take us out into the woods for a few days. We camp and climb and hike and have group. All sorts of wonderful outdoorsy things." Shelby says.  
"Oh." Sara says. "I guess that won't be to bad." She said putting on a smile and watching as Peter and Sophie walk away. But she was thinking something else. What am I going to do for several days out in the woods with these freaks? First we have these stupid assignments and now we have to go hiking? What the hell kind of place is this? I'm going to have to find Matt. She thought. He can get me out of here, if anyone can, Matt can.   
(A few moments later, we see Daisy in the kitchen washing dishes. Suddenly we hear someone humming the theme to mission impossible. Then the door swings open and David quickly jumps from the doorway to behind the door with his back against the wall. He puts his finger to his lips, motioning for Daisy to keep quiet. She has quit washing dishes and is watching David.   
David quickly moves his head around the doorway, checking to see if the coast is clear. Then he slams himself back up against the wall again hiding behind the door. Then he quickly moves from by the door, he crouches down and runs across the kitchen ducking behind a counter. He is still humming mission impossible. Then he runs back the other way. Half way across the room, he looks over his shoulder and then drops and rolls, like someone is after him. He disappears behind a shelf. Daisy watches for him and suddenly sees him scooting across the floor on his stomach toward her. He moves to behind the sink and then slowly lifts himself to a standing position. He quits humming.  
"Didn't want to be caught." He says to the questioning look on her face.   
"All that for me?" She asks sarcastically and goes back to washing dishes. "You shouldn't have."  
"Yea, well, I'd risk chopping wood for a day, to talk to you." He says back sarcastically, but then he grows serious. "I was just wondering how you were, after last night. It was brutal."  
Daisy sighs. "Well things are OK, for now." She says pausing, not sure she should tell him anything. David could be so unreadable at times. "He's coming back later today I think."  
"Oh." David said. He looks down. "You know, I understand what it's like to have an overbearing father who never thinks your good enough. There a real pain in the..." His voice trails off as Daisy looks at him. " I just thought you'd like to know that I knew..." The kitchen door opens and Shelby walks in. "How cool it was, when you took your father down last night." David said, jumping back into his usual mode. " It was better then WWF. Next time let me know though, I'll sell tickets." He says and heads out the door before Daisy can say anything to him. Shelby glares at him as he goes out the exit.  
"What was that all about?" Shelby asks.  
"Who knows?" Daisy says, not looking at Shelby, and wondering what David would have said, had Shelby not come in.   
"So how are you this morning? You left the cabin before anyone else woke up." Shelby said.  
"Yea, well, I just really didn't feel like talking to anyone. And I wanted some time to think." Daisy said, while continuing to wash the dishes.  
"Well, I'll see you later then." Shelby said. She could tell Daisy really didn't feel like talking. So she headed back out into the cafeteria.   
(Sara sat in the lodge. The others had all agreed to come here to work on there homework. Everyone was essentially sitting as couples. Jules and Auggie, then Scott and Shelby, and then it seemed as if David and Ezra had put off there differences over Daisy aside for the time being, since they were sitting together. Then again neither had said a word, but they were sitting together.   
Sara watched amused. In the few days that she'd been there she had found out a lot about the other cliffhangers personalities. She could tell that David was the troublemaker. But he also seemed to have a bit of a soft side when it came to Daisy. It also seemed as if Ezra had a huge crush on Daisy, but that Daisy only saw the two of them as friends. This was what she gathered from their actions though. She was certain she was correct, but she had no real proof. But Sara had always been good at reading people. Like the fact that Julliette was such a fake. Sara had run across many like Julliette. Julliette was a phony. Sara was almost positive of that, from the fake smiles and the flaky attitude, Sara could tell. Well Julliette, Sara thought, are you in for a surprise, because you have probably never met anyone who was a better actress then you, but I'm am. And because of that you're going to be knocked off that pedestal of yours. The only thing Sara couldn't get, was why Julliette was with Auggie. It seemed as though they had a real relationship, but Sara knew better. The prom queen never went after the barrio, by choice. She must be gaining something out of it. Sara thought. Could it be, Sara wondered? Nah, she thought, Julliette's too much of a good girl to sleep with a barrio boy.   
Sara's eyes then moved to Scott and Shelby. These two have a connection, she thought. She could tell by the way they looked at each other, how much they'd been through and how much they loved each other. I wonder if that's what Matt and I look like? She wondered. She remembered when she had met Matt. It had been the best day of her life. She pulled herself away from the thought and turned her attention back to Scott and Shelby. She knew there was a story behind these two. Out of all the cliffhangers and freaks here, Sara thought, it seemed as though Scott and Shelby were the ones who were the most real. Sara thoughts then turned to the missing cliffhanger: Daisy. Daisy she thought. There's another fake. She thought. That girl knows exactly how to hide and mask what's bothering her, but she's just hiding, like Julliette. But Sara had seen Daisy and her father the night before, and knew that there were times where Daisy showed her real side. Showed how venerable she was. Well, Sara thought, we certainly have a dysfunctional group here. I wonder what they would think if they knew the truth, she thought. Not that I would ever tell them. I can never tell anyone.  
On the other side of the room, Shelby and Scott sit working on their assignments.  
Scott is having trouble with his, so he puts his pencil down. "So what do you think of the new girl?" He asks.  
"What?" Shelby asks distractingly. She has been writing for several minutes.   
"I asked," Scott said, leaning over and taking Shelby's hand, "What you thought of Sara."  
Shelby looked at Scott. It was amazing how much his touch could still make her tingle. "I haven't really gotten a chance to speak to her. I've been too worried about Daisy. She's really having a hard time now that her father is here." Shelby says concerned.  
"She'll be fine. Daisy can handle anything. She's tough." Scott said. "Hey, why don't we take a break and go for a walk in the woods?" He says with a gleam in his eye.  
"I really should work on this, it's due Monday." She says in a serious tone, but she knows he can tell that she's not going to pass up on the chance to be with him alone.  
"Well I guess we should do some work." He says looking her in the eye. They both stand, leaving their books on the table they head out of the lodge.  
"Where are they going?" Auggie asks.  
"Probably to make out. Those two are hardly ever apart." Julliette says. "Someone should hose them off." She says with a laugh.  
"So how's your assignment going?" Auggie asks, changing the subject.   
"Pretty good, how about yours? Can I see what you've got done so far?" She asks. Auggie nods and holds up a small white sheet of paper. On it he's sketched a picture of a young girl sitting on the porch of a cabin. She is hunched over writing in a book.   
"Is that supposed to be Ann Frank?" Julliette asks.  
"Yea." Auggie answers.  
"That's really good Augusto. I wish I could draw like that. I wish I could do anything that well."  
"Don't be so down on yourself, Jules."  
"Sorry. It's hard not to be. I've just done it for so long. I know I'm good at things." With that she goes back to working on her assignment.  
"So where did you disappear to this morning after breakfast?" Ezra asked David.  
"Well, I decided it was time for some pharmaceutical comfort." David said with a straight face, not looking up from his homework.  
Ezra gives him a look. "Look, I just want to know if you've talked to Daisy. She wouldn't talk to me last night. I just want to make sure she's OK." Ezra says.  
David looks at him, considering giving an arrogant comment. "She seems OK, and that's all I'm saying." With that David goes back to his work.  
The door to the lodge opens and in walks a boy with brown hair. He has sort of an athletic build and is of average height. Sara's eyes immediately fall on him. Wow, he's good looking, she thinks sitting up a little. Behind him several other people walked in. They must be another group she thinks. The group walks in and sits down at some tables across the room, close to the table David and Ezra are sitting at. Sara gets up and walks across the room to where David and Ezra are sitting.  
"Your names Ezra, isn't it?" She asks.  
"That's me." Ezra says looking up, surprised to see Sara there.  
"I was just wondering," She said sitting down next to him, "What you were doing for your assignment. I'm just kind of stuck on an idea, I thought you might be able to help me." She said, giving him a sweet smile.  
"Um, I'm not really sure how I can help you, it's sort of an individual assignment." He answered.  
"Yea, well, OK then. I guess I'll come up with something." She said quickly getting up and heading back to where she'd been sitting. The boy and the others had left the lodge.   
"That was interesting." Ezra said after Sara walked away.  
"You know, if I didn't know better I'd say the newbie likes you." David says.  
Ezra gets an excited look on his face (he still cares about Daisy, but hey he's human). " Really?" He asks.  
"Not really, she was staring at that guy Max across the room." David says.  
Ezra gives him a dirty look, then gets up and leaves the table.  



	15. Father Of Mine Part 7

Father of mine part seven  
(Not much later that same morning. Daisy has finished her kitchen duty and has gone back to the dorm. She's been thinking about her father and what everyone has said to her about it.)  
Daisy enters the girl's dorm. She calls hello, but no one answers. She walks around and makes sure no one is there though. She then walks over to her closet. She pushes her cloths to the side and pulls out a black leather bound book. She walks to her bed and sits down. She opens the book. It is a photo album. There are pictures of her and her mom and her and her dad and the three of them.   
Daisy looks at the little girl in the picture face. "Was I ever really that happy?" She asks herself. She turns the pages, looking at each of the pictures and remembering. She then comes to the last picture in the album. It was taken at her thirteenth birthday party.  
Daisy smiled at the memory. Her family and friends had all come for the party. Her dad had even hired a professional photographer. For once her parents hadn't gotten drunk. Or at least not during the party. The photographer had asked to get a picture of the birthday girl and her family. They'd all lined up for the shot. And just when he was about to snap it, her father had cut him off. He told the photographer to wait. Then he'd reached into his suit jacket pocket and produced a velvet box. He'd handed it to her. She opened it and on the inside had been a silver locket on a silver chain. She remembered her reaction perfectly. She'd hugged her father hard and then her mother. Then he'd put the necklace on her and they had the picture taken. Later that year, Daisy had had the picture sized and put it in the locket, but then when things at home had gotten bad, she'd shoved the locket away somewhere, wanting nothing to do with him or anything from him.   
Daisy wiped the tears from her eyes. "We used to be happy." She said softly. She looked at the picture again and then began to cry harder thinking about everything that had happened. She pulled the album up to her chest and curled into a ball on her bed and cried.   
(Awhile later in the lodge. The cliffhangers are still there. Scott and Shelby have returned.)  
"You guys seen Daisy?" Peter asked walking into the lodge. The cliffhangers looked up.  
"I haven't seen her since this morning since she was on kitchens." Shelby says, then becomes worried. "Why?"  
"I just wanted to talk to her." Peter said. Shelby accepted this as an answer. The others told Peter that they hadn't seen her either.  
"Have you tried the dorm, yet?" Julliette asked. "She could be there."  
'No, but I'm headed there now." With that Peter turned and headed out of the lodge.  
(Girls dorm, moments later.)  
Peter steps in and knocks. "Daisy, Daisy are you in here?" He calls. There was no answer. He steps around the corner and sees Daisy asleep on her bed, holding a black leather book. "Daisy." He says softly, leaning over and putting a hand on her shoulder to wake her up. Daisy jumps and Peter steps back. The album falls to the floor. "Didn't mean to scare you." He says.  
"Um, not a problem." Daisy says. She follows Peter's eyes. He is looking at the floor, to where some of the pictures have fallen out of the album. Daisy quickly leans over and picks up the pictures and the album.   
"Let me help." Peter says, bending down to help.  
"No, I've got it." Daisy says, grabbing the pictures and shoving them back into the album. She then walks over to her closet and puts it back in its place. "So why are you here?" She asks, turning back to Peter.  
"I came to talk." He says and sits down on the edge of her bed. "Your father is coming back tonight. If you want him to, that is."  
Daisy looks down at her hands. "Peter, I'm not sure..." She stops talking.  
"Your not sure about what?" Peter asks.  
Daisy goes over and sits on the bed next to hers. "I know I'm not ready to forgive him yet. I'm not sure we can ever really have a relationship." She pauses. " So much has happened. My mom is dead. That won't change. My mother and father were both alcoholics, who verbally abused me for most of my life. But every now and then," She said remembering the pictures in the album, "Every now and then, we were almost a family. We were actually happy and we might have even loved each other at points. But most of the time we were unhappy. My father was a mean drunk. And because of him, I'm an angry person. I hid behind Goth make up for years because of my mother and I was angry because of my father and I don't know what I have because of me." She takes a deep breath. "I'm not sure if seeing him will change anything. I'm not sure he remembers what it was like to be a family. I still have to remind myself of what it was like." She looks up at Peter, who has been listening intently to what she has said.  
"Daisy, it's possible that giving your father a chance will turn out badly, but maybe it won't and maybe it will answer some of your questions. Maybe he does remember, maybe that's why he's here." Peter said. Daisy thought for a moment.  
"I guess it wouldn't hurt to just talk to him." Daisy said. Peter smiled.  
"Your doing the right thing."  



	16. Father Of Mine Part 8

Father of Mine Part 8  
(That night after dinner. The cliffhangers are clearing tables and Daisy is helping before she goes back to working in the kitchen.)  
Peter and Sophie walk in. "Daisy, your father's here to see you." Peter says.  
Daisy takes a deep breath. The other cliffhangers watch her for her reaction. She walks over to Peter and Sophie. "You ready for this?" Peter asks.  
"Yea, no problem." Daisy says, but Peter and Sophie can tell she's nervous. They all walk out the door together. The campus is empty, except for at one picnic table sits her father.   
"He'd like to speak to you alone." Peter says. Daisy just nods and heads over to the table taking off her apron.  
"You think that's a good idea to let them talk alone?" Sophie asked.  
"Her dad requested it. And we're staying with in distance to help out if necessary." He answers.  
Daisy walks up to the table. "I almost didn't come." She says.  
He looks up at her. "I'm glad you did." He says. They stay there awkwardly for a moment.   
"Daddy," She says, and for the first time she says it as though it's not a bad word. "What made you come here?"  
"I'd like to show you something." He said, looking back down.  
"Dad, did you not hear me, I asked why you're here." She says a little unnerved.  
Her father looks up at her from where he sits and extends his arm. He opens his hand and inside sits a silver locket. Daisy is shocked. She takes the locket and then sits down, not ever taking her eyes off of it. She is overwhelmed by the fact that he remembers, but then it hits her. "This doesn't change anything daddy. It doesn't make up for what you did to me." She says looking at him.  
"I know." He says sadly. "Nothing can take away all the pain I've caused you, but I wanted you to know that I remembered. When your mother died, I went through several of the family albums, including the one I gave to you. I kept thinking about all the good times we had. I wondered what went wrong. I made mistakes. I drank to cover up my pain. Your mother did the same thing. I'm sorry to say that it took me losing my wife to realize how bad my life had gotten." He pauses. "There I was. Sitting in the middle of the living room. I was drunk, covered in pictures of your mother, of you, of happier times. And I began to think about my life." He pauses, looking to her. "I had lost my little girl, I had lost my wife, and after years of hard work and going to this social event and that social event, the only "friend" I had was a bottle of scotch. I knew I had to change. And I knew I couldn't do it on my own. So I found a rehab center and checked myself in."  
"Daisy, it wasn't easy for me to go to rehab. Being Sober made me have to face everything I had drunk away." He pauses. "The day I got out of rehab, I went to your mother's grave and I prayed. And then I asked her to forgive me. For not being there for her, for not stopping her that night, and for not realizing how much I loved her until she was gone. And that's why I came here to ask you to forgive me. For not being there for you, for abusing you and for not realizing how much I loved you until you were gone." It's silent for a few moments. They are both thinking. "I know you can't forgive me right away, it was wrong for me to expect you to. I know seeing me makes you remember a lot of pain, that you'd rather forget. So now that you've listened, I'll go." He stands. Then looks down at her, "For what it's worth, I'm sorry for everything that I did to you. For all the pain I caused you. And as much as you might not believe it, I do love you." With that he walks away. Daisy watches him go, tears streaming down her face. She opens the locket and on the inside is the picture from the birthday party.   



	17. Unhappy Birthday part 1

This fanfic takes place after the last two I did and they may refer back to them so if your confused you may want to read them.*  
UNHAPPY BIRTHDAY teaser.  
"It was on my fifth birthday that Papa put his hand on my shoulder and said, 'Remember, my son, if you ever need a helping hand, you'll find one at the end of your arm.'   
Sam Levenson   
Shelby opened her eyes. It was early morning, no one else was awake. She got up quietly and got dressed. She then walked out of the cabin and began across campus. She wanted to be alone to think. Normally she hated to be alone. Normally she had to many bad things to think about. But sometimes she wanted to be alone to think about Scott. Today wasn't one of those days. She wasn't thinking about bad stuff or about Scott. Today she had other stuff on her mind. Today she turned seventeen.   
Peter rolled out of bed. His phone was ringing. His first thought immediatly was that something had happened to one of the kids at Horizon, that was always his first thought. He quickly got up and reached for the phone. "Hello." He said.   
"Uh, Mr. Scarbrow?" Came a womens voice.  
"Yes, this is Mr. Scarbrow." Peter said. He recognized the voice but couldn't place it.  
"This is Mrs. Merrick. Shelby's mom." The voice said.  
"Yes." Peter said finally placing the voice. " What can I do for you, Mrs. Merrick?"  
"Well, I don't know if my daughter has told you or if you know, but Shelby's seventeenth birthday is today and I would like to do something special."  
Peter hid his suprise. He knew Shelby's birthday was coming up, but he had been really busy lately working on his father's scholarship fund. "What did you have in mind?" He asked.  
'Well, Jess has been wanting to see her sister and to come up and visit Horizon, so we made our way to town and I was hoping I could come for a visit."  
Peter was kind of shocked. Shelby's mother always seemed like a nice person, but not nessacarily one that would go out of her way to do something nice for her daughter. But maybe that had all changed since Shelby's step father was out of the picture. "Well, I think that can be arranged. But I'm not sure we should make it a suprise. Shelby..." Peter's voice trailed off. He didn't want to say that Shelby didn't want to see her mother, but then again.  
"I understand." Shelby's mom said quickly. "I mean, uh, we've only talked a few times since Walt left. Things are difficult for everybody."   
Peter nodded his head, even though she couldn't see him. " I'll let Shelby know your coming then. You can come over after lunch."  
"All right. I'll see you then." Shelby's mom Alice said. "Oh, and Mr. Scarbrow, Thanks again."  
"Not a problem. We'll see you then." He said.  
"Who was that?" Sophie asked walking up behind Peter and putting her arms around her mountain man.  
"Shelby's mom." Peter said turning around to face Sophie. Sophie's face had a concerned look on it. "Today's Shelby's seventeenth birthday and she want's to visit."  
"Do you think that's a good idea?" Sophie asked.  
'I don't know. But I think Shelby's made a lot of progress since she came back and her and her mom haven't really talked about what happened so maybe they should."  
Sophie nodded and then said, "I'm just not sure how Shelby will feel about it. She has been doing well the last few months, but she can still be hard to read." Peter nodded.  
'Well, I guess we'll find out then won't we." He said.  
  
Next scene  
Shelby is sitting at a picnic table in the middle of campus. She's missed breakfast and knows that Scott's propably worried about her, but she still isn't ready to talk to anyone. She's enjoying the downtime. Earlier she'd gone for a walk in the woods. She'd returned just in time to see the cliffhangers headed to breakfast. She could tell they were trying to figure out where she was. She'd waited for them to go into the cafeteria and then had walked to the picnic table and sat down. She hoped they wouldn't say anything to Peter until after breakfast, which is why she'd stayed away until now.   
The autumn air was cool, but Shelby didn't mind. She wondered what Jess was doing. What her mother was doing. Shelby's stomach turned. She still had trouble accepting that her mom hadn't known about what had happened. Shelby had trouble beleiveing that after so many years she was finally safe and that maybe life would be ok. She felt so old. She was only seventeen and already she'd seen and faced more things then most did in a life time.   
"I can't beleive I leave this place this year." Shelby said quietly to herself. Since she'd come here this had really become home to her. The cliffhangers ahd become like family to her. She wondered if they felt the same kind of bond that she did.   
"Hey, Shel," came a voice from behind her. She turned to see Peter and Sophie walking across campus. She groaned. She hoped they didn't know that she'd snuck off that morning.   
"Hey." She said as they walked up.  
"Why aren't you in breakfast?" Sophie asked.  
"I, um, I. " She fumbled for an excuse. If she told them she went for a walk by herself there was a good chance she could get in trouble. If she told them she wasn't hungry alarm bells would immediatly go off inside there heads and she wouldn't be left alone for the rest of the day, which is exactly what she wanted to be. "I didn't feel like it." She said shrugging her shoulders. It was the best answer she could come up with.   
Peter and Sophie exchanged glances and Sophie sort of nodded and then headed to the cafeteria. "Something wrong?" Peter asked, sitting down next to her.  
"No." Shelby said. "Just wanting to be left alone." Shelby said, not trying to be too cold, but wanting Peter to take a hint.  
Peter nodded. "Maybe, because it's your birthday?" Peter asked.  
Shelby looked up. "How did you ...?"  
"Uh, your mother called." At the mention of her mom's name Shelby's face sort of clouded over.   
"At least she remembered." Shelby said.  
"Yea, she..." Peter took a deep breath. "She's coming by after lunch. She brought Jess up to visit."  
Shelby is shocked. "What?" She asks. She's excited that Jess is coming, but not as thrilled about the fact that her mom's coming. "Peter, I don't think it's a good idea. I'm not ready to talk to her."  
"Shelby, I know things between you and your mom are difficult right now, but I think it might be a good idea."  
Shelby shakes her head. " I have until after lunch then?" She asks.  
"Shel, I can call and tell her not to come."  
"No, if she's made the trip I'll see her." Shelby stood. "Besides I wouldn't want to do that to Jess." With that Shelby walked off.  



	18. Unhappy Birthday part 2

Unhappy Birthday part two  
(This scene takes place in the cafeteria. The cliffhangers are all sitting at a table together trying to figure out where Shelby is. Including the new girl Sara Hannington. To read more about her, read my fan fics on fanfiction.net A season for change and Father of Mine. This is the third fanfic of mine and the three go in order so it might refer to the other two.)  
"So do you think Shelby's OK?" Julliette asked. The cliffhangers had been talking about her since they had woke up and Shelby hadn't been in the cabin.   
"Why wouldn't Shelby be OK?" Sophie asked walking up behind the group. The cliffhangers looked at each other. Scott and Daisy threw Julliette a look that said see what you did and Julliette sent back a look that said I didn't know.  
"So why wouldn't Shelby be OK?" Sophie asked again. She knew Shelby was outside by herself, but Shelby hadn't seemed too bad.  
"Oh, just because she's not at breakfast." Sara said. Scott threw her a dirty look. "OW." Sara said. Daisy, who had been sitting next to her, had kicked her. Sophie looked at Sara. "Sorry, leg cramp." Sara said, giving Daisy a look. Daisy just smiled at her.  
"Well," Sophie said ignoring the strange behavior among the cliffhangers. "I know Shelby's not here, because she's outside talking to Peter." This surprises Scott and Daisy; they are pretty sure Peter and Sophie just arrived so there not sure if she's in trouble or if something else is up. They partially wondered this because Shelby had actually been acting a little differently all week, and hadn't told them why. She'd gone back to her I'm just fine routine. They just weren't sure what to think.  
"Morning." Shelby said walking up behind Sophie. Sophie gives Shelby a sympathetic look knowing that her mom is coming. Scott and Daisy are dying to ask where she's been, but not wanting to get her in trouble. They'd have to wait for Sophie to leave.  
"Maybe you guys should get going." Sophie said. "Class starts soon." The cliffhangers stand and begin to clear the table that they are at. "Shelby can I talk to you for a moment?" Sophie asks. Shelby nods.  
Daisy and Scott throw each other a look, they weren't expecting Sophie to want to talk to Shelby.   
"What do you think is going on?" Scott asks Daisy in a hushed tone as they walk towards the kitchen.   
"I'm not sure, but I don't think it's good." Daisy answered.  
"Let's hurry, maybe we can catch her before class starts."   
"Yea, and if not, we'll track her down after class." Scott nodded and the two headed into the kitchen.  
Shelby and Sophie walk over to a corner of the cafeteria where nobody is. "I know your mom is coming." Sophie said. " And I was just going to remind you that if you need to, well, I'm here to listen and talk. Or just listen." Sophie said, trying to figure out what Shelby was thinking.  
Shelby nodded. " What can I say?" Shelby asked and then walked away, heading out of the building.  
What could I say? She wondered. Jess and her mom were coming. Jess knew enough about Shelby's life to be able to figure out what she'd done when she lived on the streets. Her and her little sister had talked, but her mom... Her mom had no idea. Not really. Her mom knew about Walt. Her mom knew she'd run away and her mom had found her and brought her there, but Shelby also knew how much her mom could deny everything. She had barely been able to admit that she knew what Walt had been doing.   
Do I tell her? Wondered Shelby as she walked across campus. They'll look at me differently, Shelby thought. They'll not understand. Scott understood. It had taken him a while but he understood. It had taken her mom a while to admit it, but she had. Maybe it's time, Shelby thought. Maybe if I tell them it will help. No. Shelby thought. As much as people tried to grasp the concept of what she had done, they would never be able to. Scott did understand, but only as well as he could. He'd never actually sold himself on the streets. He didn't know what that was like.   
Shelby had thought she was OK with it. Well as OK as a person could be with something like that, but she still couldn't shake the feeling of being dirty. The memories of the men's cars. The smell of the alcohol that was normally on there breath when they picked her up on the edge of the street. Shelby had hated them all, but she really hated the ones who were rough. Who hit and clawed. She was sure she still had scars. Shelby shook her head trying to get rid of the thoughts. But it was impossible to escape that feeling. Even when she was with Scott it was always there. Always there reminding her of what she had done.  
The feeling wasn't as bad as it had used to be though. It had gotten better. It had gotten better when she turned Walt into the police. But all of her dirtyness , all of her feelings of hate towards herself and her body for what she'd done, they weren't just because of him. They were because of the other men to. The ones she couldn't have arrested or get rid of.  
Shelby ran her hand threw her hair and kept walking. She focused her thoughts and tried to figure out where to go. She was supposed to go to class, but she didn't want to. Her birthday was making her think of her life and what she had done and who she was. She wanted to be left alone wanted to think. And the fact that her mother was coming in a few short hours, well, it was all too soon for her.   
Shelby continued to walk, not sure where she was headed, but she ended up at the administration building standing in front of Peter's door. She knew she could talk to him, that she could trust him, that he would listen to her. Him and Sophie were the first two people who had ever really listened to her, who had ever really cared enough to listen to her. But she wasn't sure she wanted to talk. She did and then she didn't. She lifted her hand to knock, but quickly dropped it. She was nervous. Shelby almost laughed. She'd told Peter pretty much everything, yet she was nervous about talking to him. It was always hard to say the first word. After she did, it all came out and it was easier to talk, but the first word was always difficult to say. She quickly lifted her hand and knocked before she could change her mind. Peter had always been there for her and he would be there for her now.  
A moment later the door to Peter's office opened and there he stood. "Shelby." He said. "Uh, come on in." He said opening the door farther so that she could come in. Shelby walked in and sat down on the couch. She pulled her legs up underneath her and then pulled a pillow up onto her lap. Peter closed the door and sat down next to her.  
"You OK?" He asked concerned. She shook her head no, not looking at him. "You want to talk about it?" He asked and again she shook her head no. " Figured." He said, trying to get her to smile, but it didn't work. He took a deep breath and tried again. " Does this have to do with the visit?" Shelby looked away as tears formed in her eyes. Peter put his hand on top of hers to let her know he was there, but she pulled away. Peter tried hard not to sigh. It was hard to see someone so hurt.  
"Today's my birthday." Shelby said quietly. "I'm seventeen." She said a little sarcastically. "I ... I keep thinking about my life. About my time on the streets. There were so many times, so many times I didn't think I'd make it through the day, let alone the night." She shook her, head, wishing she could erase the memories. "My mom found me. But she didn't know what I did. She didn't know that I did what I did." Shelby looks at her hands. " I don't know if I should tell her." She pauses. "Almost my entire life, I was abused. My father, my stepfather, my time on the streets, the drugs, if it wasn't others, it was myself. All of it though, made me who I am. Made me what I am. I keep thinking that if were ever to be a real family, the lies and secrets have to stop. I keep thinking I have to tell them to make it stop." She looked at Peter for the first time since she walked in the office. She wanted him to tell her, that telling them was the right thing, but she also knew he wouldn't.  
Peter took a deep breath. He knew that Shelby was wanting him to make the decision for her. " Shelby, I know it's a tough choice, a really tough choice, but it's your choice."   
Shelby nodded. " I had a feeling you might say that." She said.  
"Shelby," He said, wanting to tell her, wanting to help her and make her hurt go away, but knowing the decision had to be hers. "You need to really think about this decision. About what might happen if you tell or if you don't. How your family will react. Think about it and then decide." Peter sighed. " I know you don't have a lot of time to think though, your mom will be here in a few short hours, but you can always decide to tell her at another time."  
"Peter, I just feel that telling her is the only way for us to get past everything." Shelby said looking at her hands. " For us to really heal we need to know everything that's not healing us." Shelby looks at him. " Isn't that what you say when we don't tell you everything. That unless you know what's wrong you can't help." Peter nods.  
"So you do listen to me." Peter said making a joke. Shelby smiled.  
"Don't let it go to your head." She said, but then her smile faded. Her mother was coming and she did need to decide. "Peter, would it be OK if I missed morning classes. I just want time to think about this. Without my mom present." Shelby said.  
Peter thought for a moment. "All right, but only this once and you have to make your homework up when your mom leaves and you also," He said standing and walking to his desk, " Have to write in this." He said and produced a blue notebook out of his desk drawer. Shelby groaned. "But I'm going to give you a choice."  
"Like wether or not I actually do it." She asked hopefully.  
"No, like whether or not I read it. I want you to write in here at least once before your mom gets here and once after. And you can decide whether I read it. Or whether or not I just read parts of it. Deal?" He asked holding out his hand. Shelby shook it and he handed her the notebook. She headed for the door.  
"And Shelby," She turned around. " I'm here if you need me all right?" Shelby nodded. And then walked out of t 


	19. Unhappy Bithday part 3

UNHAPPY BIRTHDAY part three  
The cliffhangers are in class.   
Notes between Scott and Daisy  
Scott writes - Where do you think Shelby is?  
Daisy writes - She's probably with Peter.  
Scott writes - She finished with Peter remember?  
Daisy writes - Maybe she's with Sophie. Remember Sophie wanted to talk to her.  
Scott writes - I think something is wrong. She disappeared this morning. And did you see how she looked.  
Daisy writes - Maybe she was with Peter all morning.  
Scott writes - No. Peter had just shown up. I'm sure of it. Something's wrong. I know her. I can tell.  
Daisy writes - I know her too, I was just hoping I was wrong.  
Scott writes - I'm still hoping I'm wrong.  
Daisy gives Scott a sympathetic smile before turning back and trying to focus on what Jeff is saying. She hadn't heard a word all morning, she was too worried about Shelby. Shelby had looked scared at breakfast. Daisy had only seen her for a moment and hadn't even talked to her, but she knew. Shelby never looked scared, not even when she'd gone home. Shelby had put up the brave front then infront of everyone, except for her. Daisy had known she was scared, but Daisy hadn't seen it, but now she saw it. It scared Daisy.  
I wonder if Scott saw it? She wondered. Scott and Shelby were in love. They were. But Shelby could be so complicated sometimes. Daisy understood why though. In the letters that Shelby had written her why she was away, Daisy had been able to learn the truth. Had been able to live the nightmare right along side of Shelby. When Shelby returned Daisy had been thrilled. But things were different now. Had changed when Shelby came back.  
Shelby had faced her problems why she was away and she was now happy and ready to move on. But Daisy wasn't ready to move on. She wasn't ready to face her problems or to deal with them. But now that Shelby had, Daisy couldn't help, but feel like she should face hers. Like Shelby wanted her to face hers, so that Daisy would also be happy. Daisy knew this feeling was unwarranted, but she couldn't help how she felt.  
Just like she couldn't help how she felt about David and Ezra. The two were always fighting over her. She enjoyed it in a way and other times it really bugged her. Daisy shook her head trying to rid herself of the thoughts. And again trying to focus on what Jeff was saying. But her thoughts again went away. Went to when her father had visited. He's said he was sorry and that he loved her and that now it was up to her. She wasn't ready yet. But she felt maybe she was closer then she'd ever been to forgiving her father. That scared her. She had always hated him. Actually just what he'd done and who he was when he drank, when he was sober things had been ok. Not great, but ok.   
She looked up at Jeff and forced herself to focus on what he was saying.   
"So you need to read chapter twelve and answer the questions on the handout I gave you. It's due tomorrow. Class dismissed." Jeff said. Daisy looked to Scott. They were both thinking the same thing: Want to go find Shelby? Daisy nodded and the two started to head for the door. "Daisy, Scott?" Came Jeff's voice. The two looked at each other and then headed to talk to Jeff.  
"Yes Jeff?" daisy asked trying to get right to the point.  
"I noticed you two had a nice commentary running throughout the class." The two looked at each other again and then back at Jeff. "You want to explain why the two of you were off in your own little world?" Daisy looke dot Scott, there was one thing that could actually save them and that was the truth. No other excuse would work.  
"Well," Daisy said. "We wondered why Shelby wasn't here. She missed breakfast and were just concerned." Daisy said trying to act nonchalant.   
"Oh." Jeff said. " I can see why you'd be worried. But Peter gave her the morning off from classes." Daisy and Scott were shocked. Peter hardly ever allowed someone to miss classes. "But, the two of you did not have permission to miss class." He said talking about their utter unattentiveness. "Just make sure it doesn't happen again and that you actually do the homework tonight or else you will be really behind tomorrow." Jeff said giving them a break.   
"No offence, Jeff." Scott said, "But are we done here, we want to find Shelby."   
"Go on. But try to pay attention in my class from now on." He said.  
'Yea, sure. No problem." They said and headed out the door quickly,  
"So where do you think she is?" Daisy asked Scott.   
"I'm not sure, why don't we try the administration building first. See if she's with Peter and if not, we'll check the girls dorms." Daisy nodded and the two took off for the administration building.   
Julliette and Auggie walked arm in arm across campus. "Where do you think Shelby was?" Auggie asked.  
"I don't know, but Scott and Daisy are really worried." She looks at Auggie, "Not that I'm not, but I'm sure she's fine." Julliette said, with more confidence then she felt.  
"Why don't we ask her?" Auggie said. " She's right there." He said pointing to a tree near the edge of campus. Shelby was leaning against it, hunched over working on something. Julliette nodded and the two walked over to where Shelby was sitting. It became clear once they got closer that Shelby was working on a journal, which Julliette assumed had been given to her by Peter.   
"Working on one of Peter's wonderful assignments?" Julliette asked trying to break the ice. Her and Shelby had been getting along pretty well lately, but Julliette was still never quite sure if Shelby was having a good day or a bad day.  
Shelby looked up. "Hey, Princess. Enjoy class?" She asked.  
"I always enjoy Jeff's lectures." Julliette said sarcastically and then sat down next to Shelby. Auggie waved at Julliette and headed across campus, he could tell the others wanted to be alone. "You have to write in the journal for running off this morning?" Julliette asked.   
Shelby looked down at the journal and then quickly shut it. Julliette was never really one Shelby could open up to, but over the last few months they'd been getting along. Shelby didn't know if it was because she had changed, or because Julliette had changed. Maybe it was both. Julliette was developing a thicker skin and standing up for herself. Shelby had started not being so thick skinned and had started trusting people and allowing her self to be happy. It was different for both of them, but they were getting along better.  
"Well, actually Peter doesn't know I ran off." Shelby said.  
"Then what's with the journal, and why weren't you in class?" Julliette asked concerned.  
"Um, my mother's in town and wants to visit. She'll be here after lunch." Shelby said.  
"Is that good or bad?" Julliette asked.  
"I'm not sure. Can we not talk about it though? I kind of just want to be left alone."  
"If that's what you want." Julliette said a little hurt. Her and Shelby weren't exactly best friends but they were no longer enemies.  
"Yea, it's what I want." Shelby said and Julliette stood and walked away to find Auggie.  
Shelby looked down at the notebook. She'd been writing in it since she had left Peter's office. She needed to get her thoughts out there and this was one way she could do it without having to talk to anyone. Scott and Daisy are probably worried, she thought. They haven't seen me all morning. Maybe I should go find them, she thought looking at the journal and then across campus and then back to the journal. But both of them would want her to talk and she wasn't ready to do that. She stood up. I should tell them, she decided. It's not like they won't find out. With that Shelby headed off across campus.  
  
"Have you seen Shelby?" Scott asked. Peter was sitting at his desk working on some papers, but Daisy and Scott had dropped by.  
"I talked to her earlier. We talked and then she left." Peter said answering the question.  
"You don't know where she is then?" Daisy asked, trying to mask her concern, but not doing a good job.  
Peter looked at the two of them. "I'm afraid I don't know exactly where Shelby is, but I know she asked for some time to herself and I agreed. She'll find you when she's ready." Peter said. He knew he shouldn't have told them that much, but this was Shelby's best friend and her boyfriend.  
"Peter, is something wrong with Shelby? Did something happen?" Scott asked worried.  
"Scott, I can't tell you that. But she'll find you when she's ready I promise." Peter said. Scott sighed and threw Daisy a look that said let's go check somewhere else. The two turned and headed out of the administration building.   
On the way to the girl's dorm they ran into Auggie and Julliette who were walking across campus holding hands. When Julliette had left Shelby, she ran to catch up with Auggie. "Hey Aug. Julliette." Scott said. "Have you seen Shelby?"  
"Yea, she's by the woods near the edge of campus behind the gazebo." Auggie answered.   
"But I don't really think she's up to talking. She seemed kind of down." Julliette looked to the ground. "Maybe it's because her mom's coming."  
"Her mom's coming?" Daisy asked. Shocked that Julliette knew and she and Scott didn't.  
Julliette's face held surprise. "You didn't know?" She asked quietly. She hadn't realized. Well just chalk this up to another thing Shelby can hate me for. Julliette thought. I'm always screwing things up, just like my mom said I do. "Um. I've got to go." Julliette said turning away. "Homework and stuff." Auggie gave her a strange look, but followed her as she headed to the lodge.  
"Her mom's coming?" Scott said shocked. "Did you know about this?" Scott said turning to Daisy.   
"No. I'm just as surprised as you are. Who would have thought Shelby would tell her, before us." Daisy said. Scott nodded in agreement.  
"But if she's telling Julliette, then something's wrong. We should find her." Daisy nodded and the two took off to where Julliette had last seen Shelby.  



	20. Unhappy Birthday part 4

Unhappy birthday part four  
  
Auggie and Julliette sit on the couch in the lodge. Auggie has his arm around her. "I can't believe I said that." Julliette said. "I thought they knew." She looks to Auggie. "Why do I always mess everything up?"  
"Jules, this isn't your fault. You didn't know." Auggie said trying to comfort her. "Quit blaming yourself."  
"Quit blaming herself for what?" Sara said as she walked up behind them.   
"Nothing." Auggie said. Sara had arrived about a month ago, and she seemed nice, but Auggie didn't like her. Something about her seemed off. He could tell she wasn't who she said she was.  
Julliette gave Auggie a look. "It's nothing Sara, I just said something I shouldn't have that's all."  
"What did you say?" Ezra asked walking up with David. The tension between them was obvious to everyone. Julliette and Auggie could tell they'd been arguing about Daisy again.   
"Yea, and did Peter hear you say it?" Daivd asked coyle. "Because it's only wrong if they hear you, not if you say it."  
"Yea, logic according to David. That's real sound advice for you." Ezra said.  
"Yea, well I am a master at giving advice. I advised Daisy on what to do the other night. If you know what I mean." David said smirking at Ezra. Ezra wanted to say something to David, but Auggie stopped him.  
"Why don't you two just cut it out?" Auggie said.  
"Yea, there's more to worry about then who wins Daisy." Sara said rolling her eyes. She hating watching them fight over Daisy. It was just annoying to her. All these freaks thinking that there problems were just so important.   
"Yea, like that Shelby's mom is coming.' The second the words were out of her mouth Julliette dropped her head in her hands. "I can't believe I just said that."  
The others looked at her shocked. "Shelby's mother?" Ezra asked. "No wonder Shelby's been acting different lately. She must be freaked."  
"No you're the one that's freaked. Freidkin." David said.   
"Hey, why don't you just step off." Auggie said to David. "Before I make you."  
"Oh. Big man on campus now are we?" David said. He loved to create tension among the group; it was entertaining to him.   
"Doesn't it bother you, going through life wondering whose going to beat you up next?" Sara said. David rolled his eyes.  
"Come on guys." Julliette said. She was feeling worse. It was bad enough that she had let it slip to Scott and Daisy, but the rest of the group. Shelby would be mad at her for sure. I have such a big mouth, she thought. "Let's just go to the cafeteria. We're on kitchens and lunch is soon." She said. She figured that maybe doing chores would keep her mind off of what she'd done.   
"I wonder where she is." Scott said looking at Daisy. The two had been looking everywhere for her since class had ended. Julliette and Auggie had told them behind the gazebo, but Shelby wasn't there. They had then tried the girl's dorm, but hadn't seen her.   
I can't believe her mom's coming, Scott thought. She must be so... so ... He couldn't even think of a word to describe it. He remembered how he felt when his dad had come. This was actually one of Shelby's mom's first visits. She'd come and picked up Jess, but she had only been there for a few moments and then she'd left. Shelby hadn't really said much to her. Things had been awkward between her and her mom. Scott knew that feeling. Things between him and his dad were less then stellar. I wonder why she didn't tell me? Scott asked himself. He hated it when Shelby didn't talk to him. It made him feel as though he wasn't good enough to be trusted. But he knew it was Shelby. He knew Shelby had made a lot of progress in opening up to him, but they still weren't willing to tell each other absolutely everything. And that bugged him.   
He'd told Shelby about his whole life and she'd tried to shut him out, because he pressured her to talk about her life. And then once she did. He'd shut her out. He hadn't been able to accept it right away. But then he had. And he'd apologized for not accepting it, but that hadn't been enough. She'd wanted him to understand and now that he did, she still shut him out. Not as much, but she still did. I guess old habits die hard, he thought.  
"Let's try the guys dorm." Daisy said suddenly.  
"What?" Scott asked, pulling himself away from his thought.  
"Maybe she's looking for you. If she is she would be looking for you in the guys dorms." Scott nodded and the two took off.  
Shelby opened the door to the guy's dorm. After she'd decided to tell Scott she'd gone looking for him in the lodge. Then she'd gone to the docks. It was there spot and if he was looking for her there was a chance he would check there. But he hadn't been there. So she'd checked the cafeteria, knowing they were supposed to be on kitchens, but he wasn't there yet. Now she had decided to check the guy's dorm She was sure he would be here, but as she rounded the corner and saw his bed he wasn't.  
Shelby knew Scott was always going to always try to be there for her, but he hadn't been there for her when she'd needed him, when she'd told him about her life, he'd pulled away. That was the one thing she'd feared would happen most and when it had, it had hurt beyond words. But she still loved Scott. She'd never stopped even when he'd pulled away. She doubted he's ever stopped loving her. She doubted they would ever stop loving each other. Shelby loved who he was, loved that he made her feel so good. Loved him for understanding and loved him for trying so hard. For trying to make it work. For never giving up, even when she'd pulled away.  
Shelby walked over to his bed and sat down on the edge of it. She picked up a picture off of his nightstand. It was of Scott and his dad. "What would I have done without you?" She asked quietly tracing Scott's face with her finger. She knew without him she never would have made it through. Daisy was there too. Her brain reminded her. That was true. Scott might have been the first to understand, but Daisy was the first to accept her for who she was.   
Shelby took a deep breath setting the picture back down. Her eyes lingered on it for a moment. Scott was a good guy. She loved him. She'd been through so much though. They both had. How had they ever gotten lucky enough to meet each other?   
"Shelby!" Shelby looked up to see a breathless Scott standing in the doorway. Daisy came in behind him. "We've been looking everywhere for you." He said coming walking across the room. He put his arms around her and hugged her. Shelby accepted the hug. Daisy hung back a moment and then came over after the hug had ended and sat on the bed across from them.  
"We know your mom's coming." Daisy said, getting straight to the point. Shelby's face registered shock.  
"How?" She asked looking away.  
"Julliette let it slip." Scott said.   
"Should have known not to trust the princess." Shelby said, but she wasn't really mad.  
"That's not important right now." Scott said. "I want to know how you are. You've been gone all morning."  
"I know." Shelby said quietly. She took a deep breath. They deserved to know and she'd planned on telling them, but now that she was going to tell them... "Um, today's my birthday." Shelby said. Scott and Daisy were shocked by this. Her birthday. Why hadn't she told them? "Yea, my birthday." Shelby said responding to the look on their faces. "My mom brought Jess up to visit because of it. And I'm just not sure I'm ready for it." Shelby said, playing it off. Trying to make it not sound like such a big deal.  
"When are they coming?" Scott asked.  
"After lunch. Doesn't exactly leave much time does it?" Shelby said.  
"I'm sure it won't be all bad. You do get to see your sister after all." Daisy said.   
"I know, but..." Shelby's voice trailed off. They all ready knew about her life, why was it hard for her to talk about it. "I think it's time I told my mom." Shelby said, forcing the words out. She knew if she hadn't she never would have said anything.  
"Tell her what?" Daisy asked. "She already knows about Walt." Daisy was a bit confused.  
"About your life on the streets?" Scott said quietly. "You want to tell her about that?" He wasn't sure this was a good idea.  
"Yea." Shelby said, not looking at either of them. "Jess knows enough to be able to figure it out, but my mom, she's deluded." Shelby pauses. "I talked to Peter earlier and I think the only way for my family to really heal is if I tell them exactly what I've been through."  
Scott thought for a moment. He understood that. Things between him and his dad were really bad. But the only way to work through the things that had caused the problem was to tell his dad what the problem had been. "OK." Scott said. "I support you."  
Shelby was a little shocked by this. She had thought Scott would protest. "Thank you." She said and gave him a kiss on the cheek.  
"Well," Daisy said. Scott and Shelby looked up, they had almost forgot she was there. "If you want to tell your mom and Jess then I'm here for you, but how do you think they'll handle it."  
"I don't know." Shelby said. "Jess will probably won't be shocked. But my mom... I just don't know what to expect from her. I don't know what she'll think when she finds out what her daughter did." Shelby looked down remembering her time on the streets. She shook away the thoughts. "I don't really feel like talking about it anymore." Shelby said. "Maybe we should just go, were on kitchens after all." Daisy and Scott nodded. They knew that Shelby was done talking. The three stood and Daisy headed out of the dorm. Scott and Shelby held back. Scott took Shelby's hand.   
"If you need me to be there when you tell them..." Scott said. Shelby nodded.  
"Thanks, but I'm not sure I'm going to tell them yet. I think it's time, but once I'm actually sitting in front of her, I'm not sure I'll be able to do it."  
Scott nodded, he understood that feeling. "I love you Shelby. No matter what." He said and kissed her softly on the forehead.   
"I love you too." She said and the two walked hand and hand out of the cabin and headed for the cafeteria.  
  



	21. Unhappy Birthday part 5

Unhappy Birthday part 5  
"So where do you think they are?" Sophie asked Peter. All the cliffhangers except for Shelby, Scott and Daisy were in the cafeteria on kitchens. But the other three weren't found yet and lunch had started fifteen minutes earlier.  
"I'm not sure, but I'm certain they're all together." Peter said. Just then the back door to the kitchen open and Daisy walked in followed by Shelby and Scott.  
"You're late." Sophie said sternly, as the three came in and saw them.  
"Sorry, they were with me." Shelby said. "I wanted to talk to them about my mom's visit."   
Peter and Sophie looked at each other. "Shelby, I know your wanting to talk about your mom coming with Scott and Daisy, but you three can't just skip your chores. Or disappear for an extended amount of time. So the three of you are on kitchens for the rest of the week." Daisy, Scott and Shelby groaned.   
"And Shelby you better hurry and eat, your mom will be here soon." Sophie said. Shelby nodded. And walked around to get a tray and eat. "Why don't you and Scott eat with her?" Sophie said looking at Daisy. Peter nodded. It was going to be a rough day on Shelby; they might as well enjoy lunch.   
"Thanks Peter." Scott said and Daisy and Scott hurried to get a tray and join Shelby in line.  
"Well Shelby looks like she's holding up ok." Sophie said to Peter as they watched the three get into line.  
"Yea, but she's scared. I can tell. She's not sure what to do." Peter said.   
"I'm sure things will work out." Sophie said. "Shelby's faced a lot in her lifetime. She's stronger now."  
"I know that and you know that, but I think Shelby forgets sometimes."  
"Guess he wanted to give us a last meal." Daisy said as the three walked over and sat down at a table in the corner of the cafeteria.   
"Well, he didn't have to. I don't even think I can eat." Shelby said.  
"Hey things will be fine. You just have to tell your mom and Peter will be there when you do and so will I." Scott said. "If you want me to be."  
"I don't know. I haven't decided whether or not to tell yet. We'll see when she gets here, but thanks. For the offer." Shelby says.   
"You'll make the right decision." Daisy said.   
'You think so?" Shelby asked. Over the last few months Daisy opinion had come to mean a lot to Shelby.  
"I do." Daisy said. The three continued to talk. None of them really ate anything they were all too nervous waiting. Finally they got up and took their trays to the kitchen and began working on their chores along with the other cliffhangers.  
"So your mom's coming?" David asked as the group worked.  
Shelby looked a little shocked that he knew. "Yea. Why?" She asked.  
"Just wanting to know. Maybe your mom's as pretty as you are." David said.  
Shelby gave him a look of disgust and then smiled. "Yes. But like her daughter she doesn't date your kind." With that Shelby went back to work.  
"Guess you told him." Scott said playfully.  
"Guess so." She said. "he can be such a jerk sometimes."  
"I wonder what Daisy sees in him." Scott said.  
"I think she wonders the same thing." Shelby said as she watched Daisy say something to David and then walk away.  
They group worked for a while longer no one really talked. Everyone could feel the tension. Shelby, Scott and Daisy were all worried about Shelby's mom coming. Julliette was worried that Shelby would be mad at her if she found out she'd let it slip. Auggie was worried about Julliette. And David and Ezra were worried because Daisy was worried.   
Just then Peter walked into the room. Shelby froze so did the others. "Shelby you moms here." He said.  
Shelby carefully and slowly set down the dishes she was working on and then took her apron off. I need more time, she thought. Scott looked at her, "you want me to come with you?" He asked. Shelby was dying to tell him yes.  
"Um. I need to do this myself.' She said quietly.   
"I'll wait for you. I'll be there when you're done." He said. Shelby nodded and looked at Daisy. Daisy gave her an encouraging look. Shelby turned and walked over to Peter. The two headed out of the cafeteria.  
"Your mom and sister are waiting in my office." Peter said as they walked. "Are you ready for this?" He asked. He could tell Shelby was scared.   
"Why wouldn't I be?" She said a little sarcastically, but then took a deep breath. "I think I can manage." She said.   
'Well I'll be there for you." He said.  
"I know." She nodded and the two walked into the administration building and to Peter's office. Peter stepped in front and opened the door for her. Shelby stepped through the door.   
"Mom?"   



	22. Unhappy Birthday part 6

Unhappy birthday part 6  
  
'Shelby." Jess cried excited, she ran over and the two sisters embraced in a hug. "I've missed you so much." Jess said, letting her sister go.   
"I've missed you to." Shelby said with a smile. Then she looked at her mom. Alice, Shelby's mom, had risen from her seat.  
"Shelby." Alice said. "Um. Happy birthday." She said.  
"Yea. Thanks." Shelby said. She hadn't expected that from her mom.   
"Why don't we all have a seat?" Peter said. Shelby and Jess walked over to the couch and sat down. Peter took a seat in his desk chair and Alice sat back down in the chair that was across from Peter.  
It was on this couch, Jess thought. It was on this couch I asked him to save my life. She looked at Peter. If only he knew how things had changed in her life. How different things were now.   
"Well, I know you guys haven't seen each other in a while," Peter said, breaking into Jess's thoughts. "Why don't we start by you telling Shelby why you decided to visit?"   
"Well, today's your birthday.' Alice said looking at Shelby. " And I know things have been rough between us lately, but I wanted to see you. I missed you."  
"I missed you to mom." Shelby said.   
"Last time you were together," Peter said. "Was when you picked up Jess. How have things been at home since then?"   
"Well," Alice said, "Things haven't been perfect. Money's tight, but we manage."  
"Jess, how have things been at home?" Peter asked.  
Jess looked at Shelby and then at her mom. "Things have been ok. We manage." She said.  
"Shelby how do you feel about that?" Peter asked.  
"Well," She said. "I wish you were doing better then just managing." She said to her mom. "But if you're managing I guess that's good." She said, not really sure what to make of it. The tension was thick between the three. "Mom," Shelby said suddenly. "There's something I need to tell you and Jess."  
Peter looked at Shelby. So she had decided to tell them. "What is it?" Jess asked concerned. She could tell her sister was bothered by something.   
"I ... I need to tell you about my past." Shelby said. She couldn't believe she was about to tell her mom this. How would she react? I have to tell her though, she thought. It was the only was things would get better was if all the secrets were gone.   
'Shelby, I don't think we need to discuss the past," Alice began.  
"We do." Shelby said. "We may have never been a very close family, but I want us to try. And to do that we can't have any secrets. I think it's time you guys know about what happened to me. About what I did when I ran away." Shelby looked at her hands. They were shaking. She was managing to keep a steady voice though.  
"Shelby it's in the past." Alice said.   
"Mrs. Merrick, I think it would be a good idea to hear her out." Peter said. Alice nodded.  
Shelby sat there for a moment. She took a deep breath. If she was going to back out now would be the time. She knew this was the right thing though. She just couldn't find the right words.  
"I'm sorry mom." Were the first words out of her mouth. "I never meant to... to end up the way I did." Shelby tried to stop the tears but couldn't. "After what happened with Walt, I couldn't stand to be in that house, near that man. I hated acting like nothing was wrong, like I was fine. So I began to run away." She paused. "When I wasn't in that house, I could breath. But I ran out of money. I had no food, or shelter, I had nothing. And I couldn't go back to where he was, I couldn't. For awhile I slept under the Santa Monica peer. I would go out every day and beg for money, but it was never more then a dollar or two. Not enough to buy a meal or get a room. Then one day I met a girl. Her name was Patty. She was a runaway too. She was from Kansas. She ran away because she hated her family and she never wanted to be found. She offered me a place to stay and something to eat. She said that if I could come up with half the rent I could stay with her. I told her I didn't have a job and she said she knew of one." Shelby was crying harder now. She was unable to look at Peter, her mom or her sister. "I sold myself." She said and began to sob.   
Alice was shocked. "You mean you had sex with men for money?" She asked.  
"I didn't know what else to do." Shelby said.  
"Why didn't you come home?" Alice asked.  
"Home." Shelby said bitterly. "That house was, is full of horrible memories. Do you know what it's like to lye in your room at night. Praying that tonight will be the night that he agrees to stop. Or that you'll die so that you don't have to think about it anymore." Shelby paused. "I did so many drugs to get away from the pain and I ran to get away from him and I couldn't get rid of it. I wanted it to be gone, but it wouldn't leave. I slept with those men, I slept with those men for money because I, I couldn't make money any other way. There was no way I could survive without doing that." Shelby looked down at her hands. "I'm not proud of what I did, but I'm not ashamed of it either. Had I not done it I would have died. I regret everyday, getting into that first car, allowing that first man to... to do that to me."  
Jess looked at her sister. She knew what it was like. She'd almost ended up just like her. Jess suddenly leaned over and wrapped Shelby in a huge hug. Jess now understood how Shelby got so much of what had happened to Jess. Of how much she had gone through. Shelby and Jess cried for the a long time, but Shelby finally pulled away from the embrace. She looked at her mom. There were tears in her eyes. Shelby couldn't believe there was actually tears in her mom's eyes.  
"Mom?" Shelby asked. Alice stood and walked over and sat down next to Shelby.  
"I'm the one who's sorry." She said as the tears she held in began to flow. "I ignored what that man did to you and Jess. I looked the other way because I didn't want to believe that that could happen in my home. I'm so sorry for what happened to you." Her mom began to cry and Shelby leaned over and hugged her mom. Jess leaned over and joined the hug too. Shelby was shocked her mom believed her. Shelby felt relief. For the first time in a long time Shelby felt relieved.   
Shelby walked out of the lodge her mom and sister were behind her. She stepped onto the porch and there sat Scott and Daisy. Shelby looked at them and smiled. "Mom, I'd like to introduce you to some friends of mine." Shelby said walking over to Scott and Daisy. "Mom, this is Scott Barringer and Daisy Liponowsky. You guys this is my mom."  
"You can call me Alice." She said extending her hand and greeting Scott and Daisy.  
"You guys remember my little sister." Shelby said and the other two nodded.   
"How would you guys like to help me celebrate Shelby's birthday?" Alice said. "Peter," Alice said turning around, "Would you mind if we used your school to throw a birthday party. We'll keep it simple. Just a cake and a couple of presents, nothing to extravagent."   
"I think that would be a great idea." Peter said. "I recommend the lodge though, it's better for a party." The group smiled.   
"Well, I'm going to head back to the motel and make some arrangements." Alice said. "We'll be back at about five thirty, to decorate. And you guys will help me that right?"   
"We're at your beck and call." Daisy said. With that Alice and Jess headed for the car, but not without a quick hug with Shelby. The group watched them drive off.  
"I figure you'll want to fill them in, ' Peter said, "but after you do, I'd like you to come back to my office all right." Shelby nodded.   
"hey Peter,' She said as he headed into the building.  
"yes?" He said turning around in the doorway,  
"Thank you."  
"Hey, it's my job." He said with a smile and then walked into the building.   
"Looks, like there's a happy ending." Daisy said as Shelby sat down next to them.  
"Yea." Shelby said with a smile. "I told my mom and Jess about my time on the streets and they understood. My mom even apologized. She said it was her fault that I went through so much because she never acknowledged what Walt was doing."  
"Wow." Daisy said.   
"yea." Shelby said looking at her friend. " I almost feel silly now for not wanting to tell them."  
"Hey it could have gone either way." Daisy said.  
"I know, I got lucky. I wonder if it's really hit my mom yet. You know. Like if she really realizes what I did." Shelby said.  
"I'm sure it will be fine." Scott said. "The hard parts over. You've told them."   
"I know." Shelby said looking at Scott. She leaned over and hugged him. 'Thank you for being here for me." She then kissed him. "I better get to Peter's office." She said after the kiss ended. She stood up and then leaned over again. This time to hug Daisy. "Thanks to you too. I'm glad that I have a friend like you." With that Shelby turned and headed to Peter's office.  
"Things seemed to have worked out." Peter said talking to Shelby.   
"Yea. I'm so glad she understands." Shelby said. She couldn't believe how happy she felt. She felt better then she had in years.   
'I'm really proud of you Shelby. I know how difficult it was for you to face your mom and tell her about what you did."  
"It was hard." Shelby said. "But Peter, I'm a little surprised at how well my mom took the news. I wonder if it's really sunk in yet."  
"Shelby, I wish I could tell you that after what happened today everything was going to be ok. But there are going to be setbacks. And one might be that your mom reneges on what she says. But from what I saw today, I think she'll eventually come around. It's obvious that you all care about each other. I think you'll be ok."  
"You know what Peter. For once I feel that I'll be Ok too." Shelby said.   



	23. Unhappy Birthday Part 7

Unhappy Birthday part seven  
Later that day, the cliffhangers are decorating the lodge for the party. Each has been assigned a job. Scott's is to keep Shelby away from the lodge until they are ready for them.  
Shelby pulled out of the kiss and looked at Scott. Who would have thought things would work out, she wondered. Here she was on her seventeenth birthday sitting on the docks with someone that she loved more then anything making out.  
"Think they have the lodge set up yet?" Shelby asked.  
"I don't know. And I don't think I care." Scott answered, starting to kiss her again.  
"You know when Peter asked you to keep me occupied until the lodge was ready, I don't think he had this in mind."  
"Hey all he said was that I had to find a way to keep you out of the lodge until it was decorated, he said nothing about how we could and couldn't spend our time.' With that Scott kissed her again. This time Shelby didn't stop the kiss. She let it linger on and on.   
"So this is what you guys have been up to?" The couple pulled apart and looked up to see Daisy, looking down on them with a smile on her face.  
"I was just doing my job.' Scott said.  
"And a mighty fine job you were doing too." Shelby said flirtatiously.  
"You guys should get a room." Daisy said rolling her eyes. Then said, "We're ready for you in the lodge."  
"If we must go." Shelby said. Scott stood and then helped her to her feet. The three began to walk back to the lodge.  
"You know what?" Shelby asked and Daisy and Scott looked at her. 'Did Peter send you to find us?" She asked turning to Daisy. Daisy nodded.  
"Yea, why?"  
"I have a feeling that was his birthday present to me." Shelby said taking Scott's hand as they walked. 'Think about it. Peter gave us the perfect opportunity to be together without interruption. He probably sent Daisy because if he would have come and caught us making out, he would have had to put us on restriction."   
"I wonder what he'll get me for my birthday?" Scott said looking at Shelby and then raising his eyebrows mischievously. Shelby laughed and playfully punched him on the arm. The three arrived at the lodge a moment later.   
"Let me go in first." Daisy said. Then hurried up the steps in front of them and hurried into the lodge.   
Scott turned to Shelby and pulled her into a deep passionate kiss. A minute later it ended.   
"What was that for?" Shelby asked breathlessly.   
"I didn't have time to shop. So happy seventeenth birthday." Shelby smiled.  
'That might be the very best gift I've ever received." She said and then the two headed into the lodge.  
Shelby's face lit up when she entered the lodge. It was decorated with crept paper and balloons. Above the fireplace hung a sign that said Happy Birthday Shelby. Shelby smiled at the other cliffhangers in the room. She couldn't remember a birthday where she felt happier.  
"Happy birthday Shelby." Jess said walking over and giving her sister a hug. Shelby hugged her sister back.   
"Why don't you have a seat over here and you can open the gift we got you.' Alice said. Shelby nodded and sat at the seat her mom had indicated. Jess handed Shelby a small wrapped box.   
Shelby carefully unwrapped it as the other cliffhangers watched. "Just rip the paper off." David called.   
"No I want to keep it." Shelby said. She really wanted to rip the paper off, but she got pleasure out of watching David squirm as she slowly unwrapped it. Once unwrapped, Shelby discovered a nice shiny black box.  
'Hey look, a box. Just what she always wanted." Daisy said sarcastically. Shelby smiled at her and then opened the box. Shelby gasped when she opened it. I don't believe this, she thought. Inside the box was a silver plated chain and on it was a charm with the letter S. Shelby took it out and Jess helped her put it on.   
"Thanks mom." Shelby said getting up and hugging her mom. "Thanks Jess.' She said hugging her. Shelby sat back down. "I love the necklace."  
"I picked it out.' Jess said. "I know you've always talked of having one."  
"You remembered." Shelby said smiling at her sister.   
"We have a gift for you, Shelby." Ezra said, 'But it isn't quite ready yet, so we'll get it to you as soon as we can." Shelby nodded.   
'Why don't we do the cake?" Sophie said to Alice, who nodded, and the two walked away. The cliffhangers sort of broke apart then and started talking.  
"I never thought today would be so great." Shelby said looking at Jess.  
"Yea." Jess said. She looked to Shelby. Her sister looked happier then Jess had ever seen her. I should tell her, Jess thought, but if I do, the entire night will be ruined.   
"You ok?" Shelby asked looking at Jess concerned.   
'Yea.' Jess said plastering on a smile.  
"You don't seem ok." Shelby said giving Jess a look. "Is this about what I told you earlier?" Shelby asked.  
Jess looked at Shelby. "Shel, let's talk about it later. Mom's getting ready to bring out the cake."  
"Jess, if you're upset about it, I can understand why, but please just tell me." Shelby said.   
"Um." Jess said.  
Just then the lights were dimmed and Alice came out carrying a cake with candles lit on it. Sophie followed her. The cliffhangers began to sing.  
"Happy birthday to you."  
"Jess just tell me." Shelby said looking between her sister and her mom.  
"Happy birthday to you.'  
"Um. We can talk about it later." Jess said looking away.  
"Happy birthday dear Shelby."  
"Jess just tell me."  
"Happy birthday to you." Alice was now standing in front of Shelby with the cake. The room was silent waiting for Shelby to blow out the candles.  
"Mom's going to let Walt move back in." Jess cried.  



	24. Unhappy Birthday Part 8

Unhappy Birthday part eight  
The group stood there shocked.  
"What!" Shelby asked in disbelief, jumping to her feet. She looked from Jess to her mom and back to Jess again.   
"Shelby you should blow out the candles." Her mom said trying to ignore what had just happened. Shelby turned to her mom wanting to ask if it was true, wanting to believe it wasn't. But when Shelby saw her mom's face she knew it was true. Shelby's went numb and she wasn't sure if it was from anger or shock.   
"Your, your going to let that man move back into my house?' Shelby shouted.   
Alice very calmly set the cake down on a card table that had been set up, being sure that none of the candles went out. "That house is mine." Alice said after having put the cake down. "And I will decide who lives there."  
Shelby looked at her mom as if she were an alien. "But you said earlier... You believed me. That Walt had... That it was Walt's fault." Shelby said accusingly. 'Are you telling me you lied?"   
"Shelby, I think you should calm down. You're creating a scene." Alice said.  
'Calm down!" Shelby shouted. "I don't believe you. You said you believed me. You signed a statement for the police. You ... you know what he did."  
"No, I told the police what I did to keep my girls with me. You know after what you told me earlier I just realized that Walt is the one that's the victim here. You probably seduced him."   
Shelby cut her off. "Seduced him! Seduced him?" Shelby shouted.   
"Well, I wouldn't put it past you. After all you did sleep with men for money. Isn't that what you said?"   
Shelby's jaw hit the floor. "I explained that to you. I thought you understood." Shelby said quietly.   
"Understood. The only thing I understood is that my daughters a hor." Shelby recoiled as if she'd been slapped. Her hands began to shake and tears filled her eyes. Shelby began to back away. Someone grabbed for her arm, but Shelby pulled away. She continued backing away and tripped over something that was on the floor. She managed to maintain her balance. She heard someone say her name, but her eyes were locked on her mothers. And she couldn't seem to tear away from them. For a moment Shelby stood there, unable to comprehend what had just happened. Then she turned suddenly and took off running. She pushed through the doors and jumped down the steps. She ran as fast as she could into the cool night air. Past the bear, and the girls dorms and the gazebo. She kept running and running and running. Tears streamed down her face, but Shelby couldn't even feel them. She couldn't feel anything. She just kept running.  
The cliffhangers stood there helplessly after Shelby ran out. They were too much in shock to even move. Only Daisy and Scott had known the true story of Shelby's past, the rest only knew parts. And they had all been too shocked when they heard it to move. Daisy and Scott, Peter and Sophie, they were all too shocked to move. Jess had been the only one. She'd tried to stop Shelby, but had been unable to. It was easy to see the devastation that had shown on Shelby's face when she took off.   
Peter found his voice first. "Mrs. Merrick I think you should go." He said shortly.  
Alice nodded and began to gather her things. 'Come on Jess." She said. But Jess just gave her mother a cold glare through the tears that were rolling down her face. "Jess. I don't have time for this." Alice said.  
"Jess, you can stay here." Peter said stepping between Alice and Jess.   
'You can't do that." Alice said.  
"I just did." Peter said. Alice started to argue, but then just turned around and walked huffily out the door. Peter surveyed the group. He could tell most were shocked by what had happened. "All right, everyone." He said trying to take control again. "You guys can stay in here tonight. Daisy and Scott I want you two to go get the sleeping bags. Make sure to bring one for Jess." Daisy and Scott nodded. 'The rest of you go get anything you need and meet back here in exactly fifteen minutes. Anyone not back will be on shuns for a month. Go it?" The group nodded and then they all took off their separate ways. Except for Jess who fell back into Shelby's chair and began to cry. Sophie went to her and tried to comfort her. Peter blew out the candles and then headed out the door. He had to find Roger and anyone else who could help him search for Shelby. Peter knew by the look on her face that she would be capable of anything and he had to find her before she acted on it.   
Peter, Roger, Megan and Jeff searched for Shelby for several hours, but she was nowhere to be found. Peter called Curtis once they came in from searching and said he needed his help the following morning.   
In the lodge the cliffhangers were still awake. Scott was pacing the floor, fuming over what Shelby's mom had done. Daisy was trying to keep him calm, but she herself really wanted to go after Shelby's mom. Jess was in a corner sitting with Sophie. Sophie was trying to get the entire story from her, but Jess was crying so hard that she couldn't speak. The other cliffhangers talked quietly trying to digest everything that they had learned about Shelby.  
Peter walked into the lodge. The cliffhangers looked up at him. 'We haven't found her yet. We'll start the search again in the morning. Search and Rescue will be helping us." Scott uttered a swear word under his breath. Peter let it slid, even though everyone knew what he said. "You guys should try to sleep. I know it's not easy after everything, but trust me. We will find her." He said this while looking straight at Scott. Scott looked away and began to pace again.   
Peter motioned for Sophie to join him on the porch. Sophie walked across the room and followed Peter out the door. The first thing Peter did when Sophie stepped out after him was wrap his arms around her. She welcomed his embrace. She'd been trying to hold it together for the kids, but it was hard. "You really think you'll find her? She looked determined to get away." Sophie said concerned.  
"I know. But I think she may just need time. She's hurting so much right now. Everything's been ripped out right from under her. But she'll come back."  
"How can you be so sure?"  
"I can't." Peter said and pulled Sophie tighter to him.  
Peter and Sophie reentered the lodge a few moments later. The cliffhangers were still all wondering around and talking unable to figure out anything else to do. Sleep didn't seem to be an option they wee all too worried. "All right Cliffhangers." Peter said getting there attention. "If were not going to sleep, we might as well talk. Everyone in a circle in the middle of the room." He said. "Jess, why don't you join us?" He said. Jess was sitting in the corner still crying. Jess nodded and walked over. She wiped the tears from her eyes, but more were coming. She sat down and Sophie sat down next to her putting her arm around her.  
"So, who wants to discuss how there feeling first?" Peter asked.  
"You know this isn't helping Shelby. We should be looking for her." Scott said in an even voice.  
Peter took a deep breath. "I know this doesn't help Shelby, but it's after midnight and too dark to search. So for now the only thing we can do is try and help each other."  
"You mean help everyone, but Shelby?" Scott asked. "Because out of everyone that's who I want to be helping right now."   
"Scott we're doing all we can." Sophie said trying to help Peter out.  
"Well it's not good enough." Scott said and stood. He started to walk away, but Daisy stood and grabbed his arm.  
"Look, we all care about Shelby. The best thing you can do is stay with us." Daisy said. No one had ever really seen Daisy being so openly emotional. "Stay with us." Daisy said quieter this time and looking Scott directly in the eye. Scott gave her a look, but then sat down and Daisy sat down too.  
Suddenly Julliette started to cry. Everyone looked at her as she leaned on Auggie and cried. "I didn't know." Was all she said.  
'You didn't know what?" Peter asked, trying to get her to talk.   
"I never knew what Shelby went through and I said all those horrible things about her." Julliette said choking on the words. "I never knew." She said again.  
"I guess that makes it all about you, right?" Daisy asked a little angry that Julliette had turned it into a poor me thing.   
Julliette looked at Daisy. "No. It isn't about me. It's about Shelby and how I treated her. I feel horrible for it, all right? I just feel bad for her." Julliette said angrily, but still crying. Daisy could tell Julliette was sincere.  
"Sorry. I'm just..." Daisy said. Peter looked at her.  
"Your just what, Daisy?" Sophie asked. Daisy looked at them. She should have known that if she said something they would try to get her to open up.  
"Nothing." She said, looking away.  
"It's not nothing.' Ezra said the slightest bit angry. He liked Daisy and he had known her for a while now he could tell when she was and wasn't hurting. And he knew Daisy never wanted to talk, but he couldn't help but feel she needed to talk about this. Daisy looked up at him. "You know, you always push everyone else to open up. You tell everyone how they feel and what they should do, yet you almost never tell anyone about how you are. So tell us Daisy."  
'What do you want me to say EZ?" Daisy asked.  
"I want you to tell me how you feel." Ezra said.  
"Fine you want to know how I feel? I feel as though I can't do anything. I feel that my best friend is out there in the woods somewhere and I can't do anything for her. I feel like putting my fist through something right now, because I'm just that angry!" Daisy said yelling and getting in Ezra's face. Ezra looked at her and then just put his arms around her. Daisy fell into Ezra arms crying, shocking the rest of the group who had never seen Daisy like this, not even when Shelby had left.  
"I don't know how I feel." A voice from the corner piped up. "I mean I've only been here for a short time. It's not like I knew Shelby that well. I feel awful for what happened to her, but I just don't know her." Sara said. The others nodded.  
"That's ok, Sara. You can't be expected to treat her as if she's an old friend if you barely know her." Sophie said.  
"Yea." Auggie said. "But you can still have feelings about it." Sara looked at him.  
'What do you mean Auggie?" Peter asked.  
"Well, when Isaac Wilton, committed suicide, we didn't know him very well. He'd been here like a day, but we all still felt something about what had happened."  
"Yea." Ezra said.   
"Well, you know in an odd way, I feel pretty good." David said. The group all turned to him giving him evil looks. "Hey, I'm not trying to be mean here." He said defensively, "But it makes me happy to actually have the family I have." He shrugs, "Didn't think I'd ever say that. But you know, I'm just glad it wasn't me." Some of the others nodded in agreement.   
"I know what you mean." Julliette said. She looked at Peter. "Is it wrong to feel that way?"  
"No." Peter said. "You guys, it's perfectly natural to be feeling what all of you are feeling. Helpless, angry, sad, like you don't really know, and glad it wasn't you. All of those are perfectly natural reactions to a situation like this."  
"Yea, well I feel most of those.' Jess said suddenly. The group looked at her. She was still crying, but not as hard as she had been earlier.  
"Why do you feel those ways Jess?" Peter asked.  
Jess looked at Peter. She knew she could trust him. She'd learned that when she'd come up here before. When she'd asked him to save her life. "I once asked if you could save my life." Jess began. " And for a while you did. I went home and Walt was gone. But we were still in that house. All those memories were still in that house. Everywhere I turned I could sense him, feel him. I couldn't stand it, but I just kept hoping it would get better. Shelby and I would write letters and talk about what happened, because she understood. She was the only one who understood. Who knew what it was like, to be in that house, to feel how I felt. She told me how much better she felt knowing Walt was gone. Knowing I was safe. So I couldn't tell her. I couldn't tell her that mom was going to go back on what she said." Jess was crying harder now. "I knew, I knew what happened to Shelby on the streets. She never told me until today, but I knew. My mom knew too, deep down she knew, but she denied it. Just like she denied what Walt did. I thought my mom was doing better. She was doing better until about a month ago. The money wasn't really there and she was so lonely. She cried every night. At first I thought it was because of what she had done. For her not believing Shelby, but then I realized she was crying, crying for that man. And I wanted to confront her about it, but I couldn't. Like if I ignored it wasn't going on. I guess like mother like daughter, right?" She said. "When we came here today, I wanted to tell Shelby, to tell you." She said looking at Peter, "About how much things had changed about how much better they had gotten and then how much worse they had gotten, but then my mom said she believed Shelby and I thought things would be ok. But when we left she told me that Shelby's life on the streets just proved what she had felt about Shelby." Sophie pulled Jess into a hug. "I thought things would be ok. I thought that things would be ok." She said sobbing into Sophie's shoulder.  
Peter surveyed the group. Julliette was crying and Auggie was holding her. Sara had tears streaming down her face, Ezra was still holding Daisy who was now crying harder after hearing Jess. Scott was crying into his hands and looked as if he might be praying. David was starring off into space and Peter could tell he was trying to hold in his emotions. The group had pretty much broken down. An d Peter couldn't help but wonder if the group was like this now, what would happen if Shelby never came back. If she really had ran.  



	25. Unhappy birthday part 9

Unhappy birthday part 9  
Shelby hasn't stopped moving since she left Horizon. When she couldn't run anymore, she just walked. She was afraid to stop, afraid if she stopped moving that she would feel something. So she just kept going. She had made it to the road about an hour before. The sun was starting to come up and she knew she had to find a ride before it was daylight or else they would find her. She figured she had about half an hour to an hour left.  
I'm so cold, Shelby thought. She couldn't believe how cold she felt. How numb she felt. She had stopped crying a while before. "Tears will never get you anywhere." That's what Patty had always said. "You just do what you do to get yourself through."   
Shelby continued walking, she didn't want to go back. She didn't know how to deal with what had happened. She couldn't figure out if she was angry, sad, relieved, depressed. She wasn't sure it even mattered. All she knew is that for one day, she had actually had what she had always dreamed of. The happy family, a boyfriend and a best friend. And other friends hanging around, coming to a party for her. One of the few times she was having an actual birthday party instead of just cake when her mom got off work. She had hoped and prayed for a life like this and she had finally had it for one bittersweet moment. Shelby wondered if she had enjoyed it more because after everything that she'd been through she had come to believe that real happiness was a joke. Even though her time with Scott made her happy, he wasn't someone that had always been with her. He hadn't seen her grow up and change. Scott made her happy, but what Shelby wanted was family. A real family. And now she never would have one.   
"I should have known," Shelby said to her self. "I should have known it wasn't for real. You let your guard down and all that happens is you get hurt." Shelby was truly convinced of this now. After everything in her life she was certain of it.   
Shelby turned at the sound of the car that had broken her out of her thoughts. She stuck out her thumb, indicating that she needed a ride. She'd done this to every car that had passed. This car was different though. This one stopped.  
"Where you headed?" A young guy behind the wheel asked.   
He looks ok, Shelby thought. Better then some of the other people she used to take rides from. The young man behind the wheel had dusty blonde hair and sort of an athletic build. He was dressed nicely in a business suit. Shelby found that odd since he was driving a pick up truck.   
"Any place your going." Shelby said with a smile. She was amazed that she was able to smile after everything that had happened. She had gotten used to giving the fake friendly smile to guys. But every time she did it, she was amazed that she could actually smile. Shelby shook the thoughts away and opened the door and climbed into the truck.   
They drove in silence for a while. "My names Mark." The guy said looking at Shelby. "What's yours?"   
"Clarissa." Shelby said. Shelby had learned on the streets that you never use your real name. Too easy for people to find you.   
"Well Clarissa," Mark said, "What's a girl your age doing out at this hour?" Shelby didn't answer him. "Not in the mood for chit chat?" He said. "That's fine."   
Shelby watched out the window as they drove down the road. Shelby remembered the ride up this rode. The first time she'd come to Horizon, her mom had brought her. She had found Shelby on the streets a few days earlier. Shelby had been high when her mom found her. At least I hadn't been dressed in my "work" cloths, Shelby thought. Her mom had freaked out that her daughter was using. But her mom had really sent her to Horizon because she had ran away so much.   
Flashback   
Shelby is sitting in the car, her mom is driving. Shelby was pale and thin. Someone had spotted her on the streets and called her mom. And now she was on her way home. Back to that house with that man. The high had worn off and now Shelby actually had to face a little bit of reality. She didn't speak to her mother though. She just stared out the window. I'll just run away again, she thought. She'd done it so many times before.   
"One of these times, you're going to run away and your not going to make it home." Her mother said angrily. Alice was used to this, but it didn't bother her any less. Shelby had been running away for years now. Every time they had found her, but every time she was gone longer and longer. And every time Alice and Jess waited at home by the phone, praying that the next call wouldn't be someone telling them that they needed to identify the body.   
"Yea, well that might be better then going home." Shelby said.  
"Is home really that bad? You have a sister that adores you, a mother that cares about you and a step father that loves you very much and that goes to work every day just to support you."  
Shelby thought she would be sick. Any mention of that man made her skin crawl. He was a monster. But Shelby would never tell that.   
"You might not care whether or not you live, but your family does and I'll do what ever it takes to keep you alive."  
End of Flashback.  
Shelby's almost laughed at the words she heard in the flashback. If only her mom had known what she had gone through back then. Maybe her mom wouldn't have looked for her, maybe she would have been better off on the streets, doing drugs and prostituting to make money. Shelby thought maybe that would have been easier, at least then she wouldn't hurt like she did now. Before she had hurt, but the drugs had made it tolerable. It hadn't gotten rid of the pain, but it had made it tolerable. But Shelby knew that had her mom not found her when she did, if her mom hadn't made her go, she'd be dead right now. Horizon really had saved her life.  
Horizon, Shelby thought as she watched out the window.  
(FLASHBACKS)  
"The key to Horizon is that it's a safe place."  
"The essence of Horizon is responsibility and you were irresponsible."  
(end of Flashbacks)  
Shelby shook the thoughts away. Horizon might have been able to save her once, but they couldn't save her this time. Her mother and her sister had let her down. I left her there, Shelby thought. I left Jess with her. No, Shelby assured herself, Peter could help Jess, now that Shelby was no longer at Horizon Jess could go there for help. Peter could save her, there was still time for her little sister to get help.   
"Could you save my life, too?" That's what Jess had asked Peter. Peter knew she wanted help now, Peter knew he could give it to her and now that Shelby was out of the way, everyone would be better off. Even Scott she thought. The thought of him almost made her cry, but she managed to hold it in. He'll be better off without me. Once his dad realizes, then he can go home without worrying about leaving me. He'll be able to have a good life. And not worry about his girlfriend. His girlfriend the hor.  
(Flash BACK)  
"He really likes you."  
"Why'd you come back."  
"But he likes me for all the wrong reasons."  
'Because ... Because I love you."  
"So make him like you for all the right ones."  
(End of Flashback)  
Shelby shook the thoughts away. He doesn't really love me, Shelby thought, no one can ever love me. He had understood, he had understood once, and he had promise dot be here for her through all of this, but Shelby wouldn't let him. She felt betrayed. Betrayed by Jess, because she hadn't told her, betrayed by her mom, for her going back on her word, and betrayed by all the people at Horizon. They had all tried to convince her she was better then she was. That she actually had something to give that she was lovable. Shelby knew now that wasn't true. If her own mother and sister could betray her, if they could believe it was her fault, well then the others could decide at any moment that it was her fault too.  
Peter rolled over and looked at the ceiling. It took him a moment to realize where he was, but then the night befores events came rushing back to him. Peter sat up and looked at his watch. He groaned. He had had maybe four hours sleep. After the little talk the group had had, Peter wasn't sure they would ever get any of them to sleep, but by three o clock they had all fallen asleep. Some of them hadn't slept to well. Sophie had had to take Jess to Peter's office. The girl had been plagued by horrible nightmares, once she had finally fallen asleep.  
Peter looked around the room. Had it been any other morning, under any other circumstances, he would have made them all get up and separate. They had somehow become entangled in each other during the night. Ezra was asleep with his head propped up against the couch, Daisy and him were holding hands, Daisy head was resting on Scott's lap, Auggie was using Scott's legs as a pillow, and Julliette was asleep in Auggie's arms, Sara's head was on Ezra's lap and David was using Sara as a pillow. When they had gone to bed the night before they had been close, but not that close. Peter wondered how he had missed that.   
He stood slowly. They had needed each other last night. They needed each other until they found Shelby and then they would need each other to help pull Shelby through it. He didn't want to do anything to provoke them to break apart. He walked across the room, being careful not to step on anybody. He rounded the corner and ran right into Sophie.  
"Morning.' He said. Sophie looks amazing, he thought, even if she is half asleep.  
'Yea." Sophie said. She had a cup of hot tea in her hands.   
"Where's Jess?" he asked.  
"She's completely out. I didn't want to wake her."  
"I take it she didn't sleep well last night."  
"She fell asleep at about five. She hasn't woken up since. How are the others doing?"  
"Take a look for yourself." Peter said and motioned to the cliffhangers. Sophie looked at them and smiled.  
"They shouldn't be like that, but it is cute."  
"That's what I thought." Peter and Sophie watched them for a moment. "I just wish Shelby was here."  
"So do I."  
"I'm going to go call Curtis. When I called him last night he said he'd start the search as soon as it was light enough to. He also said he'd phone around to try and find out anything, in case she's made it out of Agnes."  
Sophie nodded. "What am I supposed to do with them?" She asked indicating the cliffhangers.  
"Let them sleep. Stay here until they wake up. Once there up, if we still have to search the woods they can help. "  
"What about Jess?"  
"I'll send Megan over to watch her." Sophie noddedd.  
"What if they can't participate in the search?"  
"If they can't, then they can stay here."  
'Stay here and do what?" Sophie asked.  
"I'm sure you'll think of something." He said and gave Sophie a quick kiss before jetting off to make the call to Curtis.  
"Thanks." Sophie said rolling her eyes.   
Tears ran down Shelby's cheeks as she walked. Mark had dropped her off a few hours out of Agnes. She wasn't sure exactly where she was but that didn't matter. Shelby was much more interested in getting away. She couldn't help, but think of yesterday's events. Yesterday afternoon everything had been perfect. Her mom had understood, Jess had understood. She had been truly happy for the first time in a very long time. She had sat on the docks making out with Scott and waiting to go to her birthday party. She had felt normal, like a real person. Like a whole person. And then, in a matter of minutes her world had crashed down around her.   
"I'll never be able to look any of them in the eye again." She said quietly to herself. It didn't matter that Scott and Daisy had understood and accepted her. People could do a 180 to quickly. "You really can only rely on yourself.' She thought.  
Shelby's brain wondered to other topics. Like how she was able to still be moving after so many hours. She hadn't slept at all and she had barely eaten, but somehow she was still moving. Must be adrenaline, she thought. Because there was no other reason for her to still be moving.   
Shelby kept walking as her thoughts returned to before she came to Horizon.   
(Flashback)  
"You're sending me away?" Shelby had said angrily. Her mom was standing in her bedroom doorway. Shelby's bags were packed and next to the door.  
'Shelby, I told you I would do whatever it took to keep you alive and I meant it. Horizon is supposed to be a wonderful school. They can handle you, I can't."  
"What ever." Shelby had said, walking over and grabbing her bags. "If you're going to send me away, then let's just go."  
"Shelby." Her mom said as Shelby had pushed past her.   
(End of flashback.)  
Shelby remembered what it had been like when she found out she was leaving. She had acted angry at her mom, but she had actually been relieved. Glad that she wouldn't have to worry about Walt and if he would come into her room. If only she had known he would use Jess. Shelby would have stayed at home. She would have much rather lived through that hell five times over then watch her sister have to live through it.   
My sister, she thought. She's with mom back in Agnes. Back where Daisy and Scott are. Shelby shook the thoughts away. She couldn't think about it. She'd decided on the car ride with Mark, that she wanted to make a clean break. If she was going to do that, she had to stop worrying about where she used to be. Who she used to be with and who she had almost became. She couldn't allow her self to think about that or anything like it. If she was going to survive she had to be strong.  
Shelby heard a car horn and turned to see where it was coming from. It was behind her. It was a car alarm that someone had set off. Shelby looked around. She realized she was in a parking lot. A building loomed before her. Shelby didn't know what it was. Across the street from where she was she noticed a gas station. She began walking towards it. She knew that a gas station could tell her what time it was and wouldn't ask questions. Shelby walked across the street. For a moment she wondered what had happened to Mark, but she didn't wonder long though. He'd just been her free ride.  
Shelby walked into the gas station. A blonde haired boy was standing at the counter with his back to Shelby. She stopped in her tracks. Then she shook her head. For a moment she had thought it was Scott, but she knew that was impossible. The boy turned around and walked passed her.  
"Sir," Shelby said addressing the man behind the counter, "I was wondering, can you tell me what time it is?"  
"It's a little after twelve." The older man said. Shelby nodded and then walked out of the gas station. She started down the street again, looking more at her surroundings this time. Shelby started recognizing things. Not much but some things. Then Shelby realized where she was at. She'd been here before. She was about five hours away from Agnes. Her mom and her had stopped here when she's come back to Horizon. They had even went into the same gas station. Shelby had talked to the guy behind the counter, why her mom had filled up the gas tank. I wonder if he recognized me, Shelby wondered. If she'd recognized him, it was possible he'd recognized her. I have to get out of this town or at least off the main street, Shelby thought.   
Shelby looked around. Where am I going to go from here? She wondered. She began walking, in what she hoped was the a direction that would take her to some place else.   
As she continued walking, she noticed that it was actually a pretty nice day. No rain and it wasn't too cold. She looked up the sky hadn't a cloud and the sun was shining so it was warm. Thank God for small favors, Shelby thought, as she walked. She had been so cold earlier, but she was beginning to warm up a little. She still felt pretty numb though.   
Back at Horizon the cliffhangers had woken up and Sophie was trying to get them to eat lunch. She'd agreed to allow them to eat in the lodge. None of them felt like dealing with anyone, but each other. Peter came into the room, everyone looked up to him.  
"Any news yet?" Sophie asked anxiously. It was almost twelve thirty in the morning and Search and Rescue had been looking for a while now. The other cliffhangers hadn't woken up until about ten o clock. Peter had joined the search earlier, but had let the cliffhangers sleep after their rough night.  
Peter looked at the group, who were waiting quite impatiently. "We're still looking. They going to begin to search some of the towns around here. Roger is looking, but can't get a lead." He said. He looked to the cliffhangers. 'Anyone who wants to help search the woods for her can. They all stood. "But you have to go in groups of two or three and stay with in shouting distance of each other, All right?"  
They all nodded. "Go get your stuff then."  
Shelby had been walking for what seemed like forever. She almost laughed. Of course it felt like forever, she'd almost been walking nonstop since she left Horizon the night before. But now she was beginning to feel it. Her body was beginning to ache from all the walking and running, not to mention the crying.   
Shelby could only remember one other time when she'd ever felt this bad. And that was the first time. The first time she'd... Shelby shook the thoughts away. She couldn't think about that, not now. It hurt way too much to think about it. Shelby continued walking. Trying desperately to keep her mind off of the night before. Off of all the thoughts from before. But her mind kept turning back to it.  
(Flashbacks)  
"My daughter the hor."   
Shelby... It's not what you did.  
"I told that guy at CPS not to believe a word you said."   
It's...It's his scar tissue.  
When are you going to grow up.  
"It's poison you know  
Stop blaming everyone else for your mistakes  
All of it.  
I hope he dies.  
It eats you up inside."  
I prayed for it my whole life.   
I called cps the day that you told me about your stepfather.  
There's something you're not telling me.   
Three days later, they were here, and then suddenly you denied it, like it never happened.  
You have to tell me what happened.   
I don't understand it.  
I had sex with men for money.  
He did it to you.   
Why are you protecting him?  
He'll try.  
The same thing that happened to me...   
I'm not protecting him.  
He...He abused you.   
He...he promised.   
He molested you.  
You know what that makes me?  
If...if I wouldn't tell, if i never told, he... he wouldn't touch you.   
A survivor.   
It's not your fault.  
He'll never understand  
Look at me, all right?  
Well, then, he's not the one  
You have to tell me what happened.   
My friend, patty, the one who O.D.'d?   
Just stay out of my life.   
You're a lot like her.  
How I feel is I'm done.  
I take that as a compliment.  
I'm done with feeling bad and hating myself,  
It is.  
being a victim,  
Every day in the shower,  
being abused,  
I stand there-- every day-- and I think "what a waste.  
She always said that you saved her life  
"What a waste, 'cause I'm never gonna get clean.  
And on what you do and everything that you've done for her,...  
And I'm done with wanting things I know I can't have.  
You can have me.  
And, um, well, there was something i was wondering.  
I want you.  
What's that, honey?  
You don't want all of me.  
Could you save my life, too? 


	26. Unhappy Birthday part 10

Unhappy birthday part ten  
Scott walked through the woods. He couldn't believe this was happening. Shelby had been gone for almost a full day now. And it was almost dark. He'd been calling her name for so long that he had almost no voice left. He knew Peter would make them go back soon. I have to find her, he thought. She needs to know I'm here for her. She needs to know that I will always be here for her. He turned and watched Daisy. Daisy had been with him since they had started searching. Her face was tear streaked. Only moments before she'd been angry. Yelling at Scott that searching was pointless that Shelby was gone. Scott had gotten angry back.   
"She's not gone!" He'd shouted. "We'll find her. We have to find her." He'd told her.   
"Face reality Scott, she's probably in the next state by now. Shelby knows how to get around."   
"You can't give up, Daisy." He'd told her.  
"What does it matter to you?" Daisy had shouted at him angrily. "You were never there for her before. "  
This comment had really hurt him and he'd started to get in Daisy's face, but then he had stopped himself. "Look, I know your hurting, so I'm going to just let that go. But I care about her too. I may have screwed up once, but trust me it was a mistake I learned from."  
Daisy had looked at him. "Sorry." She had said and the tears had began to flow, then she had sat down on a log. "I just can't handle this. She's somewhere out there. What if..." Daisy hadn't been able to say it. Scott wasn't sure he would have been able to handle it if she had said it. Scott had then sat down next to her.  
"Daisy, don't do this. Shelby's tough. She'll be fine." He'd said. But even as he had said the words, he had trouble convincing himself. He knew the longer she was gone, the harder it would be to find her. "You have to believe we'll find her." He had said almost for his own benefit.   
He watched as Daisy wiped her face with her sleeve. She was still crying, he could tell. She is never this upset, he thought. He remembered when Shelby had gotten lost in the woods. Daisy had blamed him. Had come after him saying it was his fault. But she'd been angry then, not like she was now. What if she doesn't come back? He thought. He shook the thought away he couldn't think like that. Shelby had to come back that was all there was to it.  
"Hey, you two.' Sophie said coming up behind them. Daisy and Scott turned to face her. Sophie could see that Daisy had been crying. It's been so hard on these two, Sophie thought. If Shelby doesn't come back... Sophie couldn't bare to think of it. She wasn't sure the cliffhangers could handle losing one of their own. Sophie wasn't sure she could bear losing one of her own. These were her kids. These were her family.   
"What is it, Sophie?" Scott asked. Sophie realized she'd completely zoned on them.   
'It's getting dark. It's time to head back to the lodge." Sophie said sadly. She had hoped there search would have been successful, but after hours of searching they hadn't a lead to go on. It was almost as if Shelby had vanished. It's just what she wanted to have happened, Sophie thought. She knew Shelby and if Shelby didn't want to talk, there was no getting around it.   
'We can't head back yet." Scott said. "We haven't found her yet."  
Sophie gave them both a sad glance. "I know how you feel. I want to keep searching for her too. But it's really best if we head back and see if there is any news." Daisy and Scott looked at her. They knew there was no news. Had there been any they would have heard. Sophie could tell what they were thinking. "You're no good to anyone if your sick and exhausted. So why don't we head back, get a bite to eat and see if there's been any progress." Scott and Daisy knew she was right. They walked over to Sophie who put her arms around both of them and the three headed back for campus.  
It was getting dark. Shelby knew she had to find someplace to sleep for the night. She was exhausted. She had talked to a few people and found that there was a park not far from a gas station that she had stopped at. The gas station had allowed her to use the restroom and clean up a bit. She had no food, but Shelby's stomach was so tied in knots from everything that she wasn't sure eating would help. She walked into the park.   
Parks were good places to sleep. Normally street kids gathered there. There was sometimes benches more often then not. Or maybe trees. Trees were good to sleep against, not as comfortable as pillows, but you got used to them. Shelby looked around. There was almost no one in the park right now. She noticed that there was some trees on the other side and several benched. That left many options. Shelby walked across the park grass. She shivered a little. It had gotten colder as the sun had set. She made her way to the bench and sat down, curling her knees up under her.   
She looked around, it was almost completely dark. The air was a bit cold. Shelby remembered this feeling. The one that always had come to her at night. Would tonight be the night I don't make it? She had always wondered that when she lived on the streets.   
Shelby sat there for several minutes. She had thought she would fall asleep, but she couldn't. Now that she had stopped moving she realized just how badly she hurt. Not just physically, but emotionally as well. She put her head on her arms as the tears began to flow. She could never remember hurting this much.   
"How did I ever make it through this before?" She asked herself. How had her life ended up like this? How was it that at one time in her life, she'd been young, innocent, unaware of pain in the world? And now, here she was, back on the streets, with no money, food or anything. And again there were people back home, waiting up for her, wondering if she was alive. Just like her sister and her mom had done before. But Shelby couldn't allow herself to think about them. She had to realize that she wasn't meant to be happy, that she wasn't meant for anything. Her life was here, in the streets, with no one around to take care of her, or to love her. This was where she belonged. This was the reason that she cried. I belong here, Shelby thought. They all know, I belong here, they'll give up looking for me after awhile. They'll understand that I was made for this. With that Shelby wiped her tears away and laid down on the bench. Sleep came to her a while later.  
"There's no word yet on where Shelby is." Peter told the cliffhangers who again had gathered in the lodge. Shelby's mom had come by earlier, to see how her daughters were. When she found out Shelby was missing, she'd been upset. Peter had made her leave though, assuring her that he would call as soon as they knew anything. She was reluctant to leave, especially since Jess had refused to be anywhere near her, but she finally had left.   
The cliffhangers sat there. They were all scared and shocked. They figured they would find Shelby by now. They figured she'd come back.  
"I think it would be best if you all try to get some sleep, it's been a long day. Tomorrow, you'll go back to classes and we'll continue the search for her. We'll let you know when we know anything." He said. The cliffhangers went begrudgingly. They knew Peter wasn't going to let them just hang out until Shelby was found. Who knew how long it would be? They all hoped it wouldn't be long, but they had all felt it wouldn't be this long either.   
"I thought we would have found her by now.' Sophie said to Peter after the cliffhangers and Jess had left.   
"So did I." Peter said. He had taken a seat by the fireplace. "I think she's feeling scared and ashamed." He said. "Her past was revealed to all of them, I'm not sure Shelby was ready for that."   
Sophie leaned against the back of his chair and began to rub his shoulders. "She probably also feels betrayed. Her sister was up here almost all day and didn't tell her. Not to mention her mom acted like she completely accepted Shelby, like everything was ok with her, when really she wasn't."   
Peter nodded. "Shelby's hurting, but I was hoping she wouldn't run completely. She's never tried to run from here. It's her safe place."  
"It was her safe place, until her mom showed up and told everyone. And then accused her of lying and it being her fault."  
"Shelby was hurt badly by this, even... I mean when she comes back were going to have a hard time getting through to her again."  
'I know.' Sophie said.   
"I think I'll go wait by the radio, maybe Curtis will find something out. They were going to search a while longer. And Roger's still trying to come up with leads."  
Sophie nodded. "Mind if I join you?" Peter nodded and then reached out and took her hand, giving it a slight squeeze. He knew this was hard on her. She cared a lot about them. He did too.  
Sophie gave him a weak smile. She could tell that he was trying to be supportive of her, but she also knew he was hurting. He had tried so hard to get through to Shelby and finally had. And now her mothers visit could ruin it all.  
Peter and Sophie looked at each other for a moment. Both knowing how the other was feeling. The cliffhangers had become their kids, had become their family. Shelby was missing, it made both Peter and Sophie feel as though a part of them was missing too.  
Daisy laid in her bed, staring at the ceiling. Shelby had been gone for over twenty four hours now. Shelby and Daisy had become extremely close since Daisy had arrived at Horizon, particularly when Shelby was having problems with Scott. Daisy had been there for her. The friendship went two ways though, when her mother had died Shelby had been there for her.   
Daisy couldn't believe how she was acting though. She had cried more in the last twenty four hours, then she probably had in her life. But Daisy knew Shelby, had learned all the personal facts of her life had shared in the pain when Shelby had had to go home. Had felt scared for her friend when she'd written letters about home to her. During all of that Daisy had held it together, but this time it was different. This time Daisy could tell her friend didn't want to come back. Daisy had seen the devastation in her friend's eyes when her mother had accused her. Daisy had been able to feel her friend's pain, maybe that's how she knew it was different. All Daisy knew was it had been over a day and Shelby was still gone. Daisy wondered how much longer it would be until Shelby returned. If Shelby returned.  



	27. Unhappy Birthday part 11

Unhappy birthday part 11  
The cliffhangers are sitting in a classroom. They had decided to sort of hold their own group. Peter had been encouraging them to talk to each other, to let there feelings about what was going on out. They'd been sitting in the classroom by themselves for almost an hour, when Julliette finally broke the silence.  
"I can't believe she's gone." Julliette said. She was curled up in a chair. Her knees tucked under her chin. Auggie was sitting next to her with his arm around her. "It's been four days. I thought she'd be found by now."  
The other cliffhangers all looked at her. "Shelby always used to run away." Jess said quietly. "She used to stay gone for weeks at a time, without being found. But we always found her. We always found her." She said her voice breaking. Scott looked at Jess. The young girl was staring off into space and it seemed as if she was almost talking to herself. She'd been wondering around campus for the past several days in a state of confusion, one moment she would be crying, sobbing her heart out and the next she would be numb, unwilling to talk to anyone. Scott knew that feeling he was doing the same thing. Daisy was too, only he and Daisy were also throwing anger into he mix. With in the last few days, they'd had more outbursts of anger then either had had all summer.   
Scott looked around the room. All the cliffhangers looked as though they had been to war. None of them had slept more then a few hours a night over the last few days. They all weren't eating like they should be. The last few days had been rough on all of them emotionally and physically. I wonder what it's been like on Shelby? He thought to himself.   
Shelby sat up, rubbing her eyes. The afternoon sun was beaming down on her. She put her hand to her head, it hurt so much. She looked around trying to remember where she was. She spent most of the past few days walking. At night she would crash in a park or an ally way, or where ever her exhausted body made her stop.   
She was physically and emotionally exhausted. She had reached a point where she was numb though. Sometimes when she walked she would put her hands to her face and realize she was crying, but she couldn't feel the tears. She almost couldn't remember why she was crying. She had managed to block from her mind any happy times she'd ever had and all that was left now was hurt and pain and numbness.   
The day before it had rained, Shelby cloths still weren't completely dry. She didn't mind though. They had been muddy from her walking through the woods and digging in trash. The rain had actually been welcome, she managed to get most of the mud out of her cloths and hair.   
Shelby stood up slowly, groaning. She stretched up, trying to get her muscles working. She'd decided that today she was going to have to find money. She hadn't decided yet where she was going, but she figured money would help her get to where ever it was she wanted to go.   
Shelby stood and looked at where she had slept the night before. She'd been walking the night before through the woods when she decided she just couldn't go any farther. She'd stopped walking and sat down against a tree. She'd spent the night there.  
Shelby's stomach growled, but she ignored it. She hardly eaten in the last few days.   
She'd managed to find some food in the trash, but that was about it. I'll get used to it again, though, she thought. She had managed to do it before, she could do it again.   
Shelby had made it several hours out of Agnes. Most of the time by walking through woods, sometimes on the streets, but mostly in the woods. That made it harder for her to find food. Trashcans didn't exist in the woods.  
Shelby began walking through the woods. She was close to the road, she knew that because she could hear cars going by. Maybe I should try to catch another ride, she thought. No, she told herself. The more people I see the more chance there is that they can find me. I'll just have to keep walking, until I think of a way to get money to buy a bus ticket.  
Roger drove down the street. He'd been searching for Shelby for almost four days now and hadn't been able to come up with any leads so far. It wasn't like when he was following Auggie and Julliette, those two weren't used to trying to hide on the streets. Even with Auggie's background, his brother having been in a gang, he didn't know as much as Shelby did about living on the streets. According to Jess and her mom, Shelby had been running away for years. And if she didn't want to be found she wouldn't be.   
Where should I check next? He asked himself. He'd been checking bars, restaurants, the woods; he just wasn't sure where to look for her. She could be anywhere. If she had caught a ride she might not even be in the same state. Roger had been checking every town off of the main rode, along with Curtis and the others. They'd all been searching. They'd been stopping and asking people on the streets, but had found out nothing so far.   
Roger knew he wasn't that far out of Agnes. Probably about five hours or so, and still her hadn't seen her. She could have made it this far out. He thought to himself. If she caught a ride. She couldn't have if she was walking, it was too far away. Roger heard a ding and looked down. His Tracker was almost out of gas. He saw a sign up ahead.   
He pulled in to where the pump was and stopped the car. He then took the keys out and got out of the car. He filled his tank and then walked into the gas station.   
"Hello." Roger looked up. Standing behind the counter was an older gentleman.  
"Good afternoon." Roger said smiling at the guy.   
"Looks like you've had a rough night." The guy said looking at him.  
"More like a rough few days." Roger pulled out his wallet. "Hey can I get a cup of coffee?" He asked. The coffee machine was behind the counter. This surprised Roger most were where customers could fill the cups themselves.  
"It's more sanitary this way." The guy said as if reading Rogers mind, he turned and began to fill a cup. He continued to talk to Roger as he did it. "We're able to make sure someone doesn't put something in it." Roger nodded.  
The guy turned around and handed the Styrofoam cup and a plastic lid to him. "Pump two right?" The guy asked. Roger nodded. 'That will be twelve dollars." The guy said.  
"How much was the coffee?" Roger asked, knowing he'd put twelve dollars worth of gas in his car.   
"It's on the house. You looked like you could use it."   
"Thanks." Roger said. The man handed him his change. As Roger was putting the money back into his wallet some change fell to the floor. Roger leaned over to pick it up and when he did, the picture of Shelby he'd been showing around fell out of his pocket. Roger grabbed the photo and set it on the counter why he picked up the change.   
The man behind the counter looked at the picture for a moment. He picked it up to take a closer look at it. Roger stood and looked at the counter for the picture, then he noticed the guy was holding it. "Have you seen her?" Roger asked.  
"Yea, she's been in here before." The guy said.  
"How long ago was it?" Roger asked.  
"The first time was a long time ago. Her and an older women came through here. I talked to her for like fifteen minutes, she seemed like a nice girl, she'd reminded me of my granddaughter." The man smiled for a moment thinking of his grandchildren.   
'You said the first time?" Roger asked. 'Has she been in here since then?"   
"Yea, a few days ago. She came in and asked me what time it was, then she left."  
"What way did she head?" Roger asked. He was starting to get excited, this was the first person he'd ran into that had seen her.  
"She walked that way." The man said pointing at the direction Shelby had headed a few days earlier.  
"Thanks man." Roger said grabbing his coffee and the photograph. He couldn't wait to tell Peter.  
  
Peter walked into the lodge breathless. The cliffhangers looked up. "What is it?" Sophie asked. She wasn't sure if it was good or bad. The cliffhangers had become very quiet and Peter could tell they were afraid of what they might hear.   
"They have a lead." Peter said and a giant sigh of relief was given. "A gas station attendant saw her the morning after she left about five hours from here in a little town. He said she was walking, but she must have caught a ride to have gotten that far."   
"Did her say how she looked? Was she Ok?" Scott asked concerned. At that exact moment he was so happy. He knew seeing her was a long way from her coming back but it was a start.   
"All I know is what Roger told me. He said that the guy recognized the picture he had. Curtis has gotten a hold of the police from that county and a few of the surrounding counties there going to concentrate there search on the counties surrounding it, and see if they can't find her. I'm getting ready to head out to join the search again. You guys will know as soon as I hear anything else." The cliffhangers nodded. They were excited about the news. They had gone days without knowing anything. They had all feared the worst.   
Peter pulled Sophie out into the hall. The two quickly hugged. They were both relieved that they had heard something. They too had feared the worst, but they had tried to remain strong for the kids.  
" Hey, I need someone to stay by the phone, since I'm going to join Roger again. Can you do that?" Peter asked Sophie.  
"Do you think I should leave them alone?" Sophie asked. Even though they had received good news, it wasn't over yet. There was still a lot more to go.   
"I think they would actually be happy to have us off their backs. We've barely left them by themselves since this whole thing happened. It might be good for them to be able to talk among themselves."  
"Even after the news they've received?" She asked.  
"Well, I can always have Jeff or Megan listen for the phones if you want."  
"No, I'll listen for the phones." Sophie said quickly. She definitely wanted to be able to hear what was going on. "I'm sure they'll be fine." She said.  
Peter nodded, gave her a quick kiss and then took off out of the building to go meet up with Roger.  
Sophie watched Peter a moment. She wished she was going to search for Shelby, but somebody had to be here, in case word came. She turned and headed back into the lodge. She stopped for a moment looking at the cliffhangers. Somebody needs to be here for them too, she thought.   
Sophie walks back into the lodge where the rest of the cliffhangers are. She can tell they're happy with the news, but it also doesn't end there fears. "Hey you guys, I'm going to go listen for the phones while Peter's gone. I want you guys to stay here and work on your homework. Jeff will be in and announce lights out when it's time." She said trying to be nonchalant.   
"Oh, come on Sophie." Ezra said. "They're actually getting closer to finding Shelby, We're all to anxious to work." The rest of the cliffhangers agreed.  
"Yea. It's the first thing we've heard that was good in three days." Sara said. Sophie thought for a moment. She knows how they feel, they want to help too.  
"I have an idea." She said. The cliffhangers look at her. "What if you guys come to the administration building with me. You can work on your homework and wait on word with me."  
The cliffhangers were quick to agree, they picked up their stuff and followed Sophie out of the lodge.  
Hours later, Peter met up with Roger in a little resturant outside the town from which Roger had earlier called.   
"Any news?" Peter asked coming up behind Roger and then sliding into the booth across from him.   
"Shelby's good. I've been able to track down few people that have seen her. One of them is a guy who gave her a ride out of Agnes."  
"So nobody's seen her for a few days?" Peter asked. He wasn't sure how to accept this news. Things had looked up when Roger had called, but now it seemed as if there lead wasn't really anything.  
"Most saw her the day after she took off. They said she was walking the streets. I ran into a girl who said she'd seen her sleeping in a park. That was the night after she left."  
"So, Shelby walked through the woods the first night. Caught a ride early the next morning to that last town, then walked all day, made it into this town and fell asleep in a park, where that girl saw her. And we don't know where she went from here?" Peter asked.  
Roger nodded. "She doesn't want to be found. We've all been looking for her, we just can't find out where she is, and if she's catching rides then she could be out of the state."   
"I'm not giving up on this." Peter said looking up at Roger.  
"Neither am I. Now that we have an area to search we may have more luck, but she's good, she'd done this before. It's going to be difficult."  
"Well, I've always done things the difficult way." Peter said looking at Roger. Roger nodded.  
"I thought you might say that." Roger said and took a drink of his coffee.  
  
Shelby walked down the street. It was dark, Shelby figured it was about eleven or twelve at night. She'd spent most of the day begging and she'd ended up with no more then a few dollars. It wasn't enough and she knew it. Begging never had been enough. There was only one way to make money on the streets. "I'll just have to do what I used to do." Shelby said to herself.  
But even as she said it, her hands beginning to shake and her heart started pounding. She wasn't sure she could do it, but it seemed to be her only was out. She had no money, no one and nothing. If she wanted to make it out of Washington she had to have money and money required a job and the only job she could do was the same one she'd had before.   
"Get a hold of your self Shelby." She said to herself. "It's not as though it matters that you do this. You've done it before. Besides the streets are where you belong and this is the only way to make money on the streets."   
It's not this bad though, another voice in her head shouted at her. It's not like before. You have a place to go now. You can go back.  
Shelby shook the thought away though. She couldn't go back, not now that they knew. 'Who am I kidding?' Shelby asked herself. "This is what I'm supposed to do. This is why I'm here." Shelby nodded as if agreeing with herself.  
She then looked down at herself. She was wearing jeans and a sweatshirt over a t - shirt. This will never get me a job, she thought. She removed the sweatshirt and tied it around her waist. The night air was cool, but she ignored it. She then tied her shirt up so that her midriff was showing. Better, she thought. Then she ran her hands threw her hair, trying to make it look decent. She smoothed it out and pulled it into a ponytail. She then began to sashay down the street. This time she smiled as cars drove by.   
It seemed so surreal to Shelby. Walking down the street like she used to. The same feelings came over her as before. That feeling of numbness and disconnection. Shelby had perfected the numbness that she'd managed to once again pull over herself. The numbness that allowed her to step out of her body until she had done what she had to do.  
Shelby watched as a car pulled up on the side of the street. Shelby closed her eyes for a moment, her heart pounding. Her thoughts went back to over two years ago, when she'd stood on a street for the first time. Patty telling her that everyone did what they had to do to make it through. She remembered how scared she'd been. How it had been ok, because after what Walt had done to her, it didn't matter what she did.   
"I'm damaged goods." She said quietly to herself. "It doesn't matter what I do." With that Shelby walked over to the car.   



	28. Unhappy Birthday Part 12

Unhappy birthday part twelve  
Shelby sat in the car and watched out the window as they drove down the street. Her breathing had become shallow and her heart was pounding. Thoughts whirled in her brain, but Shelby pushed them away. She tried desperately to get a grip on what was going on. She was sitting next to a man who was in about his forties, he had dark brown hair and sort of a muscular build and he was taking her somewhere so they could... She pushed the thought away, forcing herself to forget what was going on. It was better to forget.   
"Maybe it's better to forget. Because all it does is hurt." Shelby remembered writing that to Daisy. Shelby was jolted from her thoughts, by the car engine being turned off. She turned looking to the man next to her then quickly focused her eyes out the window. They were in a dark parking lot. Suddenly Shelby felt a hand on her hand. She looked at the man hand as if it were a foreign object. The guy turned her hand over and Shelby felt the cash as he slid it into her hand. Her hand gripped around the money hard. The guy leaned over, putting one hand on her shoulder and then he leaned in and began to kiss her neck. His breath smelled of alcohol. Shelby tensed as his lips touched her neck. It made the hair on her neck rise. She closed her eyes as tears welled up in her eyes and she clenched her hands into fists. She felt so dirty. She could taste the vomit that was rising in her throat. He moved his hand and placed it on her shoulder. He slid it down and slowly undid the top button of her shirt. He then moved his hand down and began to work on the button below that one.   
"You always were my sweet one."  
"There are other ways to make money on the street besides selling yourself."  
"You were always so good at keeping secrets."  
"You could have begged."  
"I've got a few other complimentary thoughts about your body."  
"At least she's not a skank."  
"Kitten."  
"I don't go for used cars."  
The words rang threw Shelby's head. This was who she was, she had fooled herself thinking she was anything but. The man had finished with the buttons and was now trying to push her back onto the seat. Shelby didn't move easily, but she didn't resist. As he was moving her back, Shelby felt something slide on her arm. She looked at her arm and saw it. Three beads were on a small piece of twine.   
"Listen, all that stuff that I said about you and the other guys."  
"You've faced some demons."  
"Uh, "used car."   
"A survivor."  
"Yeah."   
"I'm not proud of what I did, but I don't have to apologize to you or anyone else for it."  
"I'm sorry."  
"I am a human being so speak to me like one."  
The words echoed in her head. Scott had managed to forgive her. To see her for who she really was. Daisy had too. Peter and Sophie and Jess they all had. My mom didn't, she still thinks I'm a hor. She thinks it was my fault. Shelby looked up. The man was still on top of her. She's right. If I stay here and do this she's right.  
"I can't do this." Shelby said. The guy didn't pay her any attention. "I can't do this." She said again, only louder. She tried to sit back up, but the man was pushing her down. "Get off of me." She cried and pushed him, as hard as she could. He fell back a little allowing Shelby to sit up some, but it wasn't enough. He grabbed her arm. Shelby tried to jerk it free, but he had a tight grip. "Let go of me.' Shelby cried, trying again to get free. "I don't deserve this. I'm better then this. I am not a hor." Shelby said, not even realizing that she was saying it allowed. She pushed the man again, this time she had better leverage and her anger had helped her and she managed to get him off her.   
She sat up quickly and reached for the door handle. He grabbed her though and pulled her towards him. "Look I paid my money and I'm going to get what I want." The man said, trying to push her back down onto the seat.  
"Get off me. Somebody help me.' Shelby screamed as loud as she could. The man quickly covered her mouth with his hand.   
"OW!" The man cried, because Shelby had bit him. "You little...." He cried and hit her. Shelby tried to protect herself, but couldn't. 'Does the little hor, think she's too good now?' He asked menacingly, he reached down and pulled on her shirt ripping it, even though it was already mostly unbuttoned.   
Shelby wasn't sure exactly where it came from, but suddenly anger overwhelmed her. She wasn't sure if it was because of what happened with Walt, or her mom, or this guy, or what, but suddenly she was overwhelmed by it. She pushed him as hard as she could, grunting from the effort of it. He fell back against the drivers side door. Shelby moved quickly and managed to open the passenger door before he grabbed her again. Shelby turned though and hit him, again shoving him back against his door. Everything that she had felt the last few days became pent up anger and she just went off on the man, hitting him over and over again, until he finally managed to push her off of him. Shelby fell back towards the passenger side door and would have been stopped by it, had it not been open, but instead she rolled out of the car and fell hard onto the pavement. The guy reached over grabbed the door handle, slammed the door shut and drove off tires squealing.   



	29. Unhappy Birthday part 13

Unhappy birthday part thirteen  
It had been a week since Shelby had returned to Horizon. She had told the cliffhangers and Peter and Sophie about what had happened to her on the streets. She had decided that they needed to know. Actually that she had needed to tell them. Shelby had been suprized by their reactions. Scott and Daisy had already understood, and that didn't change. Once Shelby had told them the first thing Scott had done was pull her into his arms. Shelby had been really suprized though about how understanding Julliette was trying to be. She had accepted it and told Shelby she was sorry if she'd ever said anything that had brought back old memories. Shelby had said that was ok. And she'd meant it. Shelby was through with that part of her life. And now when she said she wasn't proud, but she wasn't ashamed she actually meant it.   
I wish things between me and mom had been that easy, Shelby thought. Alice had showed up while Shelby was telling the cliffhangers and had heard everything Shelby had said.  
Flashback  
"I... I know, that thanks to my mom you guys all know what it is that happened to me. I know you know what it is that I did." Shelby said her voice a little shaky. "I. I uh ran because it hurt and because I thought you would all look at me differently." Shelby said looking at her hands. "I was on the streets for three days, when I realized I had no money and it actually hit me that I was on the streets again. I knew I had to do something." She paused for a moment, tears forming in her eyes. "This car pulled up next to me. I got in and I was given money. And the man, he. he started to, to ... I didn't resist.' Shelby said tears beginning to fall down her face. "But something inside finally hit me. I uh remembered everything that I went through, everything I had been taught all the things you guys said and I fought him off. He uh, he managed to get in a few good hits." Shelby said and pushed back her hair revealing a dark purple bruise. " I was afraid to come back. I didn't know what you guys would think. But I knew I had to tell you. If you guys never speak to me again I'll understand." Shelby said crying. She stood and headed for the door. Scott stood and stepped in front of her.  
Shelby looked up at him. He had tears falling down his face, for a moment Shelby thought he would walk away from her, but instead Scott pulled her into his arms and let her cry on his shoulder. The other cliffhangers gathered around her too. They were all crying.  
"Shelby." Shelby had pulled from the embrace of the others to see her mom standing in the doorway. Scott had stood on one said of her, his arm around her and Daisy and Jess had been on the other.   
'You look like hell, mom." Was all Shelby said. Alice hadn't slept in days and was pale.  
"I was worried about you." She said.  
"Worried about me?" Shelby asked. "You're the reason I left."  
"Shelby I am sorry." Her mother looked away. "But I can't do things alone." Shelby sighed. Nothing had changed her mom still wanted Walt back. Shelby started to say something, but Jess cut her off.  
"If you let that man back into our house, I will not come home." Jess said.  
"Jess, your my daughter.' Alice looks at Shelby. "See what you're making you sister do?" This had astonished Shelby.  
"What she's making me do?" What she's making me do?" Jess had shouted. 'You chose him. You chose him over your own daughters. You once asked Shelby when she was going to grow up and stop blaming everyone else for her mistakes, well when are you going to? You ignored it mom. You knew and you ignored it, but we can forgive you for that. But only if you admit what a monster he is and get him out of our lives."   
End of flashback  
Shelby smiled at the memory. Jess had really stuck up for her. Things were not perfect by far, but Shelby was through with it. The scars that she had from prostituting and being abused were still there, but they weren't as deep. And Shelby knew her mom was still having trouble accepting it all, but she hoped that maybe this was a start. Jess had decided to go home with their mom and Alice had allowed Peter to give her a list of counselors and support groups that she could turn to for help.   
Shelby, who had been straightening her area of the dorm, discovered a brown box. It was under her desk. How did I miss this? She asked herself pulling it out from under her desk. Maybe because I haven't really been at my desk this week, she thought. Most of her time had been spent with the other cliffhangers or with Peter and Sophie.  
Shelby sat down on the bed and then put the box on the floor in front of her. On the top part of the box was an envelope, and her name was written across it. Shelby took the enveloped and opened it up. Inside was a letter.  
Dear Shelby,   
We wanted to get you something that you could really enjoy for your birthday, but we know Peter doesn't allow things like that here at Horizon.   
Shelby rolls her eyes, with a slight laugh as to what it says.  
Anyway, since we couldn't get approval to go off campus and shop (trust us we tried, we begged, but they said no), we decided instead that the best gift to give you would be us. So inside this box is something of each of ours. We hope you like it.  
The cliffhangers.  
Shelby carefully put the letter back into the envelope and then opened the box. There was old newspaper crammed into the box, like tissue paper. Shelby reached in and pulled out something that was wrapped in the newspaper. She unwrapped it and inside she discovered a projection film. Attached to it was a note.  
This is the film Daisy and I made, I thought you might like it.  
Ezra  
Shelby set that aside and pulled out the next item. She unwrapped it and laughed when she saw what it was. 'Only you princess." Shelby said and set the plastic tiara that Jules had given her on her desk.  
The next item was a small leather bound journal. Shelby opened it. On the inside page was a note from Sara. I brought this from home, but haven't used it, thought you might want it.  
The next item was from Auggie. It was a sketch of his tag.  
The next item was from David. Shelby stared at the package for a moment. This could be scary she thought. She unwrapped it slowly. Inside though was a scented candle and a note.   
I know that you know how to get stuff, but I thought that I'd go ahead and hook you up with something for your birthday. There should be more on the next supply truck. David.  
Shelby shook her head in disbelief. Maybe I was wrong about him, she thought.  
Shelby reached back into the box and came up with a small box. She opened it and inside was a picture of her and Scott at the morp. "Who is this...?" Shelby said, but then she saw the post it note.   
The cliffhangers called me and I went through the photo album Julliette made me for graduation. I found this and thought you might want to have it. Tell everyone I said Hi and I'll see you over thanksgiving break.  
Kat  
Shelby smiled and put the picture on her nightstand. Shelby reached back into the box and came up with a pile of letters that were hooked together.   
Shelby,  
I know this may seem strange, but I'm a Goth, so I decided to give you back all the letters you sent me while you were away. I thought maybe someday you would read them and be able to see how far you've come. And if not, at least you'll have the satisfaction of being the one to burn them.  
Daisy  
Shelby reached inside and pulled out a script. Shelby looked at it; it was from the play Ezra had "written". Why would he give me this?  
She wondered. She began to set it down, but then she noticed writing on it.   
Dear Shelby,  
I know we never got to do this play since you left, but I thought I would let you know that you will always be my Gillian and I will always be your Bobby Joe.  
Love,  
Scott  
Shelby rolled her eyes. She was actually touched by the each gift, but some of them had been pretty interesting. She started to put the box aside when she realized there was still stuff in it. That's odd, all the cliffhangers have given me a gift.  
Shelby reached down and pulled out two small packages. Inside one was a small snowglob. Inside the other was a small carved bear.  
Attached to them was a letter.  
Shelby,  
Once we heard the cliffhangers idea and how good it was, we decided to participate as well. I gave you the snowglob, and Peter gave you the bear. We hope you enjoy them and have a great birthday.  
Peter and Sophie.  
Shelby smiled. It had been a week since her birthday and so much had changed. But one thing hadn't. Scott and the other cliffhangers would always be there for her. I guess it wasn't such an unhappy birthday after all, she thought. And with that she ran off to find the others and thank them for their gifts.  



	30. Shadow Man

*Author's Note*  
- This story also picks up about two weeks after Unhappy birthday ended.   
- Shadow Man is the start of a four story arc that will mainly deal with Shelby and Daisy. All four stories will include everyone to some degree, but they are still the main focus.   
- The four stories will also deal with some controversial issues, but in a sensitive way.   
- All disclaimers apply.  
- Special disclaimers - the title of Shadow man is actually the title of a song I heard that is by K's Choice and that song inspired this story and will be used in the story.   
  
Shadow Man part 1  
  
As I was walking up the stair   
I met a man who wasn't there.   
He wasn't there again today.   
I wish, I wish he'd stay away.   
Hughes Mearns  
  
Shelby sat at the kitchen table of her house with Jess. The two were playing a game of cards, waiting on their mom to come home from work. Mrs. Merrick would be there any moment.  
"I win." Jess said, laying her last card on the table.  
Shelby shrugged, she wasn't that into the game anyhow.   
"Do you want to play again?" Jess asked, picking up the cards from the table.  
"Sure if you want." Shelby said. But her mind was elsewhere.  
Jess took the cards and dealt them out and the two began to play. "What's on your mind Shel?" Jess asked.  
Shelby looked at Jess for a moment, knowing she couldn't tell her. Shelby bit her lip. "It's nothing Jess."  
Jess played a card, but continued to wonder what was bothering Shelby. "Your not thinking of running away again, are you?" She asked.  
Shelby looked at her for a long moment. "He's gone Jess." She said. "We don't have to worry about him. I won't leave, if he's not here."  
"But he is here." Jess said suddenly.  
"No he's not." Shelby said back, confused by her sister's proclaimation. "I had him arrested. I turned him in."  
"No, you didn't."  
"I did." Shelby said. "Don't you remember? I turned him in, he's out of our lives now."  
"He'll never be out of our lives." Jess said and then stood walking out of the room.  
Shelby stood and followed her sister, wanting to know why she was acting like this. She was about to catch up to Jess, when there was a knock at the front door. Shelby sighed. She had wanted to talk to Jess. "Just a minute." She called and walked towards the door.  
She turned the door handle and opened the door slowly. "Can I help you?" She asked not really looking at who was standing there, since she was still thinking about Jess.  
Suddenly a hand grabbed her wrist. She looked up to see who was at the door and gasped.  
  
Shelby sat up in bed breathing hard. Her body shook with fear. She looked around a moment. "You're at Horizon." She whispered to herself. "You're safe here." She closed her eyes taking a deep breath trying to calm herself down. She leaned back in bed pulling the covers up around her protectively. She starred at the ceiling wondering when the nightmares would go away.   
  
Daisy watched as Shelby lay back down, wondering if she should say something. It was the third time this week Daisy had seen her waking up from what Daisy was certain was a nightmare. Shelby had told her about the nightmares she'd had when she was on the streets and when she'd been at home. Shelby had also told her the nightmares had stopped. But that had been before Shelby's birthday. Before her mom had visited and before Shelby had ran away for several days almost going back to her life on the street. She had returned though, shaken and bruised. She'd told her story to the group and everyone seemed to have accepted it, including Shelby. But Daisy had watched her these last few weeks since she'd come back and she'd noticed changes. Little changes, like Shelby jumping when people walked up behind her, or the nightmares, or even the amount of time that she spent by herself writing in a journal. Daisy wondered if Peter and Sophie caught these things. After all that was there job, but Daisy knew they didn't catch everything.   
They try, which is more then most people do, Daisy thought to herself thinking of her dad. But her father was trying and that bothered her. More then when he didn't try at all. He'd come for a visit and since then he'd written regular letters, telling her of his AA meetings and the friends he was making in AA.   
Daisy rolled over moving her hand to under her pillow. The last letter he had sent her was under there. The letter asking if she'd like to come home for Thanksgiving weekend. Daisy closed her eyes, trying to sleep, but she knew she couldn't. Her father's letter had left her scared. And not because he was trying to make things right, but because she was thinking of giving him a second chance.  
  
  
Shadow Man part 2  
The next morning, Shelby sat by herself in the corner of the cafeteria eating her breakfast. Her journal lay before her, but the thoughts running through her head she didn't want to write down.  
"Getting anywhere?" Scott asked walking up.  
Shelby glanced up at him and shook her head. "No." She said sullenly. "I don't know why Peter gave me this stupid journal in the first place. I don't want to write down the stuff that happened to me on the street."   
Scott sat down across from her setting his tray on the table. "You know his philosophy is that if you can't talk about it, write it down." He said with a half smile. He looked at Shelby, "Peter's just trying to help."   
"Maybe I don't need help." Shelby said suddenly angrily.  
"Why are you going off on me?" Scott asked, wondering what was really bothering Shelby. "I didn't do anything."   
Shelby looked at him for a long moment and then turned away. "Maybe I just want to be left alone right now."   
Scott looked at her hurt. "Since you came back, the only thing any of us have tried to do is help. But I can't help but feel that your putting walls up between us."  
Shelby rolled her eyes. "How very insightfull of you." She said sarcastically. "Heaven forbid I not want to be with you after almost being attacked on the streets."  
Scott sighed. "I'm sorry that happened. I know it's not easy for you."  
"How would you know if it's easy or not. You've never been through it."  
"Elaine attacked me." Scott said wondering why Shelby always treated him like he didn't know what it felt like. "Is this another one of those times when I didn't do anything wrong, but I need to apologize for it anyhow?" He asked.  
"You can be such a jerk sometimes, do you know that?" She said mad.  
"Why are you picking a fight with me?" He asked. "I'm just trying to help."  
"Maybe I don't need or want your help." Shelby said getting in his face.  
"We all need help." Scott said calmly.   
"I don't." Shelby said grabbing her notebook and standing to leave.  
"Where are you going?" He asked.  
Shelby's mind jumped back to months before. "I've got to open the door for the police." She mumbled. "I'm so tired of hating you. So this is it. No more hate, no more anger, just some justice."   
"What?" Scott asked knowing she was saying something, but unable to figure out what.  
Shelby turned seeing Scott. "Nothing. I've gotta go." She said and walked out of the cafeteria, leaving Scott to stare after her.  
  
Ezra and Daisy watched as Shelby walked out of the cafeteria.   
"Her mom's visit really did a number on her." Ezra said.  
Daisy nodded, not really locking at Ezra. 'I don't think it was her mom's visit that did it."  
Ezra looked at Daisy. "What?" He asked.  
Daisy looked at Ezra. "It was her time on the streets." She said knowingly. "It brought back bad memories for her and now she can't deal with it."  
"Why are you telling me this?" Ezra asked.  
Daisy looked at him confused. "What do you mean?" She asked.  
"Well, I mean, I thought you and Shelby were friends. It almost seems like your mad at her or something."  
Daisy gave him a look. "I'm not mad." She said.   
"Then why are you telling me this. Any other time you would have told me to go ask her myself. Not that I mind you talking to me." He said rushed. "As a matter of fact I kind of enjoy it." He said almost blushing.  
Daisy rolled her eyes. "EZ," She said. "I'm telling you because your my friend." She said emphasizing the last word. "But," She paused. "I don't know I guess that I feel cheated."  
"Why's that?' Ezra asked.  
"Well, I have always been there for Shelby. Her and Scott have problems, I'm there. She admits what she did, I'm there. She decides to tell her mom, I'm there." She said. "I'm always there for her, have supported her. And it's not that she doesn't support me, she does." A pause. "But I have never given her a reason to not trust me, yet she can't tell me what's wrong with her now. She shuts me out and I didn't do anything." She said.  
"She does it to all of us." Ezra said trying to comfort her.  
"Yea, well you guys aren't her best friend." Daisy snapped back at him.  
Ezra leaned back giving Daisy an amused look. "How sweet," He said. "Daisy, actually caring for someone."  
Daisy reached across the table and hit him on the arm. "Shut up." She said giving him a hard look.  
"Ow." Ezra said making a face.  
Daisy couldn't help it, she had to laugh at him. "EZ, sometimes...." She looked at him trying to think of the right words. " Sometimes..." She shook her head. "your a good guy, EZ." She said.   
"thanks." Ezra said with a smile. "Does that mean you'll go out with me?" He asked hopefully only half joking.  
"No. But it was a good try." She said giving him a smile. There was a pause as both of them went back to their breakfast.   
"Ezra," She said after a moment. "My dad..." He looked up at her and she bit her lip. "Well, he sort of wants me to visit." She said.  
Ezra looked at her surprised, but kept the thoughts that were running through his head to himself. "Oh." was all he said.  
"Yea. He thought it might be a good chance for us to work on some things. He thought about doing it over thanksgiving weekend. it's a long weekend for him, so..." Her voice trailed off.  
"Are you going to do it?" Ezra asked.  
Daisy looked at him. "I don't know." She said. "last time he was here it was... well it was what it was.' She paused. "But I'm thinking of giving him another chance." Before Ezra could say anything she rushed on. "I know that he's hurt me, but I guess... I don't know, maybe it's crazy to ever think we have a shot of being a family, but I want that Ezra, I do, and the only way I can ever have that is with him."  
Ezra looked at Daisy. "You don't have to explain that to me. Remember I'm the boy whose parents should go on Springer." He paused growing more serious. "Daisy, if that's what you want then I say go for it. But it won't be easy." he said.  
Daisy looked at him. "Just once I wish the choice was easy." She said and then she went back to eating her breakfast.   
  
"I thought with Shelby's sudden change in attitude it might be a good idea for her to have a visit. Something that may help her put things in perspective." Peter said to Sophie. They were both in his office. They had been talking about Shelby's recent change in behavior and attitude. It had been a small change at first, but lately it was getting more significant.   
"Like having Jess visit?" Sophie asked from were she sat in the chair across from Peter.   
"Not Jess," Peter said. "But family."  
"Her mother's last visit sent her out to the street and your telling me she's visiting." Sophie asked incredulously.   
"I said her family, not Jess or her mother." Peter said. He took a deep breath. "Her biological father."  
"The one who turned her away when he didn't know how to help her?" Sophie asked almost with a laugh. "I can really see her agreeing to that one."  
"Well," Peter said ignoring Sophie's doubt. "He called. He says he wants to see how his daughter is doing. And I think it might not be a bad idea."  
"You agreed?" Sophie asked.   
"Well, I haven't yet. I thought I'd talk the idea over with you."  
"Shelby's been dealing with so much since her return. Couldn't this push her over the edge?" Sophie asked.  
"Actually I'm sort of hoping it will." Peter said.  
"What?" Sophie asked.  
"Well, Soph, she's scared, but mostly she's angry. The streets brought back bad memories for her, her father will as well. And when she does, I hope it makes her angry. Angry enough to yell at him and admit that she's having problems. If not to him maybe to Scott and Daisy. If we can just get her to react to something, she'll let her emotions go and hopefully reveal what's been bothering her."  
"So we're going to try to scare her into admission?" Sophie asked skeptically. "I don't think that's a good idea. As a matter of fact, it sounds like a big risk. What if it backfires?"  
"There's always the chance it could." Peter said trying to be sure of himself. "But nothing else has worked. I don't really think we have another choice. If she keeps up the way she has, she'll be worse off then if he visits." Peter said.  
Sophie nodded. "Ok." She said reluctantly. "But let's pray it works."   
Peter nodded, understanding her concerns. "I'll make the call."  
  
Shadow Man part 3  
  
"Time for group, Shelby." Sophie called walking into the girls dorm. It was a little while after lunch and the cliffhangers had been having group everyday after lunch since Shelby's return. Peter and Sophie had hoped it would help her and at first it had seemed too, but then she'd begun to go back to her old attitude.  
Shelby looked up from where she lay with her journal. "Is there a reason for this personal call to group?" She asked sarcastically.  
Sophie looked at her for a moment wondering what she was thinking. She then sat down next to her on the bed. "Is there anything you want to talk about?" She asked concerned, hoping that Shelby would open up to her.  
Shelby looked up her a smirk forming on her lips. "Good job there, you almost sounded like a real friend." She said sarcastically and then turned back to her journal.  
Sophie was taken aback for a moment but quickly regained her composure. "Shelby I know your hurting and..."  
Shelby cut her off. "You don't know anything about how I feel, so don't presume to." With that Shelby stood, taking the journal and walking to the bathroom. She walked into the bathroom and closed the door behind her.   
Sophie, not sure of how to handle this attitude that Shelby was giving her, walked out of the girls dorm and to the lodge where Peter and the other cliffhangers were.  
Sophie walked over to Peter. "She's not coming."   
"What?' Peter asked suprised.  
"Well, she got an attitude with me and then walked into the bathroom and shut herself in." Sophie said.   
Peter shook his head. "Looks like she's getting worse." He said.   
"She seemed fine those first few weeks though." Sophie said. "Do you think it's just taken this long to really hit her? For her to really realize what happened?"  
"Only explanation I can think of." Peter said. "But with her father visiting, hopefully it will put an end to all of this." He said. He looked around at the cliffhangers who were milling around waiting for group to start. "Why don't you start group and I'll go try to talk to her?" Sophie nodded and watched as Peter headed off.   
"Ok, cliffhangers, let's start group." Sophie called.  
  
Peter knocked on the wall. "Shelby." He called. No answer. "Shelby." He called again this time a little louder. He walked around the corner and saw her laying on her bed. "Your supposed to be at group." Peter said.   
"Yea, well there are a lot of things I'm supposed to do that I don't." Shelby said not looking up at him.  
Peter stepped into the room. "Do you want to tell me what this new attitude is all about?"  
"No." Shelby said.   
Peter walked over and moved a chair from a desk over to the edge of Shelby's bed and sat down. "Shelby, the trip to the streets couldn't have brought on good memories for you." Peter said, he could see Shelby tense when he brought up the subject.  
"Could we not talk about this right now?" She asked. "After all I do have this journal entry to write." She said lifting the journal in emphasis.   
"Shelby, it's important that you not let those memories control you." Peter continued.   
Shelby rolled her eyes. "Look I don't care, all right. Those memories are no different then the memories I had from the first few times I was on the street." Her mind jumped to all the other times that she'd been on the streets and the other times that she'd left the streets and went home. Walt had always "welcomed" her back. A shiver ran down her spine as she thought about it. "I just... it's not a big deal." She said looking down at the bed trying to regain her composure.   
Peter could tell she'd been thrown for a moment. "The longer you put off dealing with this the harder it will be." He said to her. "Talking about it helps." He pointed to the journal. "Writing about it helps. Just get it out."   
"Yea well, if I don't want to, that's my choice." She said looking up at him with cold eyes.   
Peter nodded. "It is your choice." He said and stood up. "But your on laundry duty for the rest of the week for not coming to group." He looked down at her. "All choices have consequences Shelby." He said and with that he left the dorm feeling frustrated and defeated that once again he couldn't get through to her.   
Shelby rolled over onto her back and closed her eyes. She couldn't tell them how she felt about the recent events. They had never been through it and that meant they wouldn't understand.   
  
Juliette sat by the fire place working on her homework after group ended. Shelby hadn't shown up which had been surprising to everyone. Sophie and Peter had let them out early because of that. Juliet starred at her homework realizing that she hadn't turned a page in her book for about ten minutes.  
"Hey, twig." Auggie said walking over. He'd noticed that she seemed a little out of it.  
Juliette looked up and saw Auggie. "Hey." She said with a slight smile.   
"Something wrong?" Auggie said sitting down next to her.   
"Not really, just thinking." She said.  
"About what?" he asked.  
Juliette sighed. "Well, Daisy's dad visited and now Shelby's dad might visit." Juliette bit her lip. "Don't tell anyone, I overheard Peter and Sophie talking about it and Shelby doesn't know." Juliette said realizing her slip.   
Auggie looked at Juliette. "My lips are sealed." He said with a smile. And then he asked, "But what do their fathers visiting have to do with you?"   
Juliette glanced down at her hands. "I don't really get to see my father, my biological father that much." She looks at Auggie. "He brought me here." She says. "But I haven't heard from him since." A pause. 'I miss him." She says quietly.  
Auggie looked at Juliette. "Why don't you call him?" He asked.  
Juliette looked at Auggie. "My mother won't give me the number. Besides he's never home anyhow." She said trying unsuccessfully to play it off.  
"Have you tried talking to your mom?" Auggie asked.  
Juliette looked at him. "It's just so hard sometimes to try to talk to her." She said. Auggie gave her a disappointed look. "It's not easy." She said defensively. "She just, she still gets in my head sometimes." Juliette said.  
"Quit letting her control you Jules." Auggie said. "You've been so much happier since you've stopped listening to her so much."  
"I know." Juliette said. "I've gotten better about it, but I guess sometimes it's easier to give in to her then to argue with her." She said.  
"Don't argue with her Jules. Talk to her." Auggie said. He stood up. "I have to get to class." He said.   
Juliette nodded. "See you later." She said and smiled at him.  
"Remember what I said Jules." Auggie said. "Don't let her control you." With that Auggie left for class.  
  
Peter walked towards the girls dorm. It was almost lunch and Shelby's dad would be arriving soon. He'd been nearby on business and had wanted to come as soon as possible. Now Peter had to tell Shelby that he was visiting. He'd hoped that Sophie would go with him, but she was waiting for Shelby's father to show up. He nervously rubbed his hands together before walking into the girl dorm. He'd knocked, but there hadn't been an answer. He spotted Shelby sitting on her bed. Her knees pulled to her chest, her eyes closed, her body rocking back and forth ever so slightly.   
"Shelby?" Peter asked, not sure of what to think of what he saw.  
Shelby didn't respond right away, but continued to rock ever so slightly, her eyes closed tightly. "Shelby." Peter said a little louder. He reached out and touched her arm lightly.   
Shelby cringed under his touch, but didn't move. "Go away." She said quietly.  
"Shelby, are you ok?" Peter asked louder, now more concerned.  
Shelby opened her eyes and looked at Peter. "Can't you just leave me alone?" She asked with mixed sarcasm and anger  
"We need to talk." Peter said firmly, knowing she had to be told. And also wondering if he could get her to tell him about what had been going on when he'd come in.  
Shelby swung her feet over the bed, turning away from Peter. She took a deep breath trying to regain her composure. Every time she was alone the thoughts that ran through her mind were so real that she could feel the presence of the people in them. "If this is another lecture about my attending group, you can spare it. I've already heard several." She said.  
"It's not." Peter said. He took a deep breath. "Actually you have a visitor." He said.  
Shelby turned around looking at him in surprise. "Who?" She asked hoping that Jess had come.  
Peter looked Shelby right in the eye. "It's your father."  
  
  
  
  
Shadow Man part 4  
  
Shelby starred at Peter. "You can't be serious." She said.  
"I am. He's in the administration building." Peter said.  
"Why didn't you tell me he was coming?" She asked angrily.  
"It was a surprise." Peter said.   
Shelby turned away. "I don't want to see him, send him away."   
"He's come a long way." Peter said trying to convince her.  
"Well, he shouldn't have." Shelby said coldly.  
Peter looked at Shelby for a moment thinking. "Shelby, he just wants to try to talk things out with you. I think you owe him the right to hear what he has to say."   
Shelby sat there for a moment, not looking at Peter. She hadn't seen her father since she came to Horizon and it wasn't really his fault he couldn't take care of her. Besides after what her mother had done, he couldn't do any worse. Shelby stood. "All right." She said.  
Peter was pleasantly surprised. 'Really?" He asked.  
"Yes." She said and headed for the door. 'Let's get this over with before I change my mind."   
  
Shelby walked into Peter's office. Her father sat in a chair facing away from her.   
"Dad." Shelby said from just inside the doorway.   
Her father stood turning around. "Shelby." He said and smiled. He quickly walked over to her, but then paused. "Can I hug you?" He asked.  
Shelby looked at him surprised by the question. "Yea." She said after a moment. Her father wrapped his arms around her hugging her tightly. Shelby couldn't remember the last time she' been in his arms. She closed her eyes, her father wasn't such a horrible person. She wrapped her arms around him too.   
"I've missed you." He said to her.   
Peter gestured to Sophie and the two walked out into the entryway giving Shelby and her father time.  
"Your idea may work after all." Sophie said looking at Peter.   
Peter smiled at Sophie. "Don't they always?"   
Sophie rolled her eyes. "I seem to remember a cake, and a race, and a..." She looked at him. "Should I go on?" She asked.  
Peter looked at her. "No." He said. "Because I remember those too."   
"Peter?" Peter turned when he heard his name and saw Daisy standing there.  
"What do you need Dais?" He asked.  
Daisy looked at the two for a moment. "Actually, I wanted to talk to you about something." She said half-nervous, half shy.   
Peter looked at Sophie. "Can you get me if I'm needed?" He asked indicating to the office, where Shelby and her father were. Sophie nodded.  
"Why don't we step outside then?" Peter said turning to Daisy.  
Daisy nodded and the two walked outside to the porch. No one was around. Most were in classes. They walked over to the edge of the porch, both leaning against the railing.  
"So what did you want to talk about?" Peter asked. He had a feeling he knew though. He had been the one sorting the mail the last few weeks and he knew Daisy had gotten a lot of letters from her father.  
Daisy took a deep breath. "My father wants me to visit over Thanksgiving weekend." She said staring straight out over the campus. There was a pause and then Daisy said, "I'm not sure about going."  
Peter nodded slightly. "It's hard to go home." He said. "But you haven't really visited home since you came here." He paused before continuing. "Not since your mother's funeral."  
Daisy nodded. "His last visit here, was... well it wasn't great." She said. "We still have some major problems."   
"It's good to know that those problems exist though. It's the only way to work on them." Peter said.  
"What if the problem is him?" Daisy asked. "He almost hit me when he was up here, what if he still can't control his anger. Then I'm alone in a house with him."   
Peter took a deep breath. "There's always the slight chance that could happen. But your father has been doing the anger management sessions and going to AA. And you have been here for a year, I'm sure you know what to do if your father tries something."   
"Hit him with a baseball bat instead of a seven iron?" Daisy asked. Peter gave her a look. "That was a joke." She said. There was a pause and then she said, "I'm sure I could handle it if he tried anything."   
"Then why don't you want to go?" Peter asked.  
"Well...." Daisy paused and took a deep breath. "I'm just not sure I can give him another chance. I want him to be my father, but if he screws up this time, I'm not going to give him another chance." She looks at Peter. "SO maybe it's better to not give him the chance then to know that he can't be a father."   
Peter looked Daisy right in the eyes. "Are you that sure that he'll fail you?" Peter asked.  
Daisy looked at him for a long moment. "I don't think he'll fail me this time." Daisy said. "But he will.... One day. And if I trust him again then I'm just setting myself up." Peter took a deep breath. "Daisy, your father is trying to rebuild your relationship. It's not an easy thing. It will take time and undoubtedly the two of you will hurt each other. But if you try to focus on what's going on today with the two of you instead of thinking of the future, or the past," He said emphasizing the last word. "I'm sure the two of you will be happier for it." He looked down at her. "The choice to visit your father is yours and if you want to go I'll give you a pass. But think about it. Because going home will mean facing many things, not just your father."  
Daisy looked at Peter. "You mean my mother." She said sadly.  
Peter nodded. "I know you've been dealing with it, but going home will bring back many memories." He said.  
Daisy nodded. "I'll think about it." She said standing up from where she'd been leaning. "Thanks.' She said and then headed off to the lodge wondering what she was going to do.  
  
Shelby stepped back from her father and looked up at him. She may be being nice to her father, but she still has reservations. "So why are you here?" She asks putting her guard back up.  
Her father takes a step back. "It's been a while since I've seen you." He pauses looking down. "I heard about what happened with Walt and your running away." He said.  
Shelby nods finally understanding. "So you came here because of that." She said. "Did you talk to mom?" She asks.  
"Yea, she and Jess called me." Her father said.  
"So you know everything then." She said looking her father right in the eye. "Like that I was molested and that then I sold my body on the streets and that I used drugs and now I'm here."   
Her father looks at her. "Yea. I know." He said calmly.   
Shelby looks at him for another moment. "Don't you have anything to say about it?" She asked trying to keep the edge out of her voice.  
He starred at her. "What am I supposed to say Shelby?" He begins to pace as he talks. "Do you want me to apologize; do you want me to say I understand?" He looks at her. "Because I'm not sure I do." A pause as he looks at the hurt look on her face. "I know that you had no one to go to and that I wasn't any help when you did come to me. I don't know what you want me to do though."   
"I don't want you to do anything." Shelby says quietly. She walks over to Peter's desk and leans against the edge. "You couldn't help me, but you helped me find someone who could. You did everything possible."   
"Then why do I feel like your mad at me?" He asked.  
"Because I'm mad at everyone." She says. She runs her hand through her hair. "I just wish it had never happened."  
"But it did."  
"I know that." She says. A pause. 'So are you staying up here for a few days or are you headed home?" She asked changing the subject.  
"I'd like to stay for a little bit. I do have some business to attend to, but it could wait a little while." He says.   
Shelby nods. "I'll see you later then?" She asks.  
"Yea." He says and watches as Shelby leaves the office. He leans against Peter's desk breathing a sigh of relief: she didn't remember.  
  
"So how are things?" Sophie asked when Shelby walked out of the office.   
Shelby almost smiled. "Well, he's sticking around for a while." She said.   
"Is that a good or a bad thing?" Sophie asked.  
Shelby thought for a moment. She turned and looked at the door that she had just come out of. There was something she just couldn't put her finger on. "I don't know." She said honestly.   
"So how are things?" Peter asked hopefully, joining them.  
Shelby looked up at him and then rolled her eyes. "I'm going for a walk." She said and turned and walked away.  
Peter and Sophie watched her go. "Was she like that when she came out?" Peter asked.  
"No, she seemed calmer." Sophie said. "She just isn't ready to deal with all of it, but at least her father may be able to get through to her."  
Peter nodded. "Yea." he said.  
Mr. Merrick walked out of the office. "Mr. Scarbrow?" He said and Peter turned around to see him.   
"Yes?" Peter said, not bothering to correct him over his formalness.  
"If it were ok, I'd like to possible take Shelby out to eat. Not now, but sometime. The two of us don't really get to see each other that often."  
"As long as it's ok with Shelby, it's ok with me." Peter paused for a moment. "I'd like to supervise the next visit the two of you have though. Shelby has been acting a little different lately and I'd like to see how she's reacting to being around you." Peter said.  
Mr. Merrick nodded. "It's fine by me." He said. "Can I come by tomorrow morning?"  
"That would be great." Peter said and watched as Mr. Merrick left.   
  
Shelby sat on the dock, cigarette in hand. She hadn't smoked in quite sometime, but lately the urge just struck her. Especially after talking to her father. He had been nice, even considerate, but something about their meeting just bugged her. He had certainly taken the news better then her mother had. Gotta give him points for that, Shelby thought. But then again maybe it hadn't hit him yet. Her mom had reacted well in the beginning as well, but then she'd freaked out.   
Shelby looked down at her cigarette. So far she'd resisted, but now with the cigarette in one hand and the lighter in the other, she wasn't sure she could turn it down.   
Shelby heard a branch snap and turned her head looking over her shoulder. She didn't see anything or anyone. She turned back around ignoring it. Another tree branch snapped and again Shelby turned still seeing nothing. This was just like my dream, she thought.  
Shelby didn't call out though. She just starred at the trees for a long moment. She pulled her knees to her chest and watched as Walt walk from behind the tree branched. He walked straight over to her, she tried to scream but couldn't. This couldn't be happening, he was in jail. This must be a dream she thought closing her eyes, hoping that when she reopened them she'd be awake, but when she did, he was standing right before her glaring down at her.   
Shelby watched as he knelt down and reached out brushing his hand over her cheek, her body trembled at the touch. She turned her head away squirming as he put the other hand on her leg. "Shh." He said. "We want to keep our secret." He said.   
Shelby could feel tears coming on. "You're not real." She whispered.   
"I am real." Walt said looking deep into her eyes. "You'll never escape me." He said. "I own you."   
Shelby starred at him her eyes wide with fear. She started to say something to him, but the image suddenly disappeared. Shelby sat there for a moment breathing hard. She closed her eyes trying to calm herself down, but her thoughts immediately jumped.   
  
"Hey babe." Tom said as he walked over to Shelby, who was standing on the edge of the street. He had on a leather jacket and his hair was slicked back. "You look scared." He said when he stopped in front of her. He stepped forward moving in closer to her. His body was almost touching hers. "Don't worry," He said, "I won't hurt you." He smiled wickedly. "At least, not much." He said and with that he leaned over and kissed her deeply. Shelby tried to push him off, but he grabbed her by the wrists. He leaned over whispering in her ear. "I pay, you play."   
Shelby nodded slightly, as he pulled her by the wrist towards his motorcycle.   
  
Shelby felt a hand on her shoulder and jumped. She looked up and saw a man standing above her. She could only see his shadow though; she couldn't make out his face. She started to move so she could see who he was, but the image immediately disappeared. Shelby looked around the dock breathing hard. She saw no one, even though the images had seemed so real. She stood quickly and headed back towards the dorm. At least there she wouldn't be alone.  
  
  
Shadow Man part 5  
  
Shelby walked into the girls dorm, but Daisy and Juliette weren't there. Shelby knew they weren't in class. She looked around contemplating on whether she should go look for them. After a moment she decided not to. She was still shaken from her flashback and she didn't really want to go find either of them. They would both try to get her to talk and right now that was the last thing she wanted.   
She sat down on her bed and picked up her journal. She still hadn't written an entry. She picked up a pen wondering if she should write in it or not. She put the pen to the paper, but so many thoughts ran through her head, she wasn't sure where to start.  
I guess I start at the beginning, she thought to herself.   
  
(Shelby's journal entry) -  
So I ran. So I left. Not like I've never left before. I can understand why Jess was mad, after all I left her there with him. That was my fault, but Scott and Daisy and the rest, well, they were here at Horizon. They all seem to act like they know how I feel, but they don't. Scott comes the closest and he doesn't even know. Not really. It wasn't his choice.   
  
Shelby shakes her head, she doesn't really want to be writing this.  
  
(Shelby's entry continued.)  
Well, dad showed up. Mr. "I don't know how to help you" himself. But he was nice. I don't know why I told him I was mad at everyone, but I guess I still feel like he's my father. After what mom did, if I can forgive her, then I can forgive him. He never lied to me and he never didn't believe me. Or at least not yet. I'm sure he has questions and that the two of us will argue, but at least he's here. At least he's trying.  
  
Shelby looked over what she had written. It wasn't too revealing, but she still tore out the page she had written on and crumbled the paper up. She threw it into the trashcan next to her. The clock on her nightstand caught her eye. It was almost time for lunch. She stood, not even really wanting to go, but not having anything else to do.   
  
Shelby walked out of the lunch line and looked around for a place to sit. Most of the cliffhangers were sitting at a table near the back. She could see them talking, but she didn't go over and join them, instead she headed to a table that was near the window.   
"She could join us." Juliette said a little hurt to no one in particular. "It's not like we did anything but try to help."  
"Yea. well you know Shelby." Auggie said. "her and her attitude have been nothing but trouble the last few weeks. I'm surprised Peter and Sophie have let it go on this long."  
"it's just because of what happened." Scott said in her defense. "it hasn't been easy on her."   
"It hasn't been easy on any of us either." David said. "She's going to end up getting us all in trouble if she doesn't start attending group."  
"yea, if one's down were all down, remember?" Ezra said.  
"I remember." Scott said shaking his head.   
"Maybe we should call group." Daisy said. "Get her to try to talk before she gets us all in trouble."   
The others looked at her. "I doubt she's going to talk to any of us." Scott said. "When Shelby sets her mind to something, she just doesn't care."  
"I don't even know why she's acting like this." Juliette said. "I mean I do, but I don't. She seemed like she was doing better when she came back from the streets and then all of a sudden she's developed this attitude."  
"It wasn't sudden." Daisy said. "It's been happening since she came back. As what she did began to hit her, she began to pull away more and more. I watched it happen. I know."  
"So why didn't you do anything about it?" Scott asked.  
Daisy looked at him wondering if he was accusing her of Shelby's state of mind or if he was just asking. She finally decided that he was just asking. "It's like Peter always says, You can't do anything for someone until they are ready to be helped and Shelby's not ready for that. She's not even willing to admit she has a problem."  
Scott nodded. "I say we call group then." He looked around at the table and one by one the others all agreed. "I'll go tell Sophie." He said and stood up heading for the administration building.  
  
Peter and Sophie stood in the lodge. The cliffhangers were milling around waiting on Peter or Sophie to call them to sit down. Neither of the two adults knew why the cliffhangers had wanted to call this group. Scott had only said that they wanted to.  
"All right everyone." Peter said after a moment. Let's get started." The cliffhangers, including Shelby, came over and sat down in the chairs that they'd gathered together for group. "There was something you guys wanted to talk about?" Peter asked looking around at the group.  
"Yea, the usual." Ezra said.  
"And the usual is?" Peter asked.  
"The only thing we ever talk about lately." David said. He glanced around the circle until his eyes fell on her. "Shelby."  
Shelby rolled her eyes. "Going to be one of those nights again." She muttered just loud enough for the rest of the group to hear.  
"One of what night?" Sophie asked.  
"Nothing." Shelby said.  
"Can't you ever just answer a question?" David asked.  
"Can we ever discuss someone other then me?" Shelby countered.  
"Why? Feeling attacked?" Daisy asked.  
"Yea and with good reason." Shelby said.  
"Maybe we just want to help you." Juliette said.  
"Maybe I don't need your help." Shelby said.  
"Yea, because what your doing now works so well." Scott said sarcastically.  
"Oh, get over it already." Shelby said.  
"Get over what?" Sophie asked interjecting into the conversation.  
"You guys can't seem to just let something go can you? So I ended up on the street again for a few days, it was no big deal." She said.  
"Obviously it was." Daisy said. 'because since your return you've been on a downfall."  
"Look, my little visit to the street did nothing to me. I've been on the street before for much longer amounts of time and done a lot worse. So it's not a big deal."  
"If it's not a big deal then why can't you talk about it?" Juliette asked.  
Shelby sat up and looked directly at Juliet challenging her. "What do you want to know?" Juliette turned her head, she'd never been good at confrontations. "Now, who's the one who can't talk about it?" She asked sitting back.   
"Maybe we want to know how you felt." Scott said looking at her.  
"Maybe?" Shelby asked. She shook her head. "And they all wonder why I don't talk to you." Her voice was full of sarcasm.   
"Shelby there's no reason to be mean." Sophie said.  
"Oh, yea." Shelby said sarcastically. 'No reason at all." She stood up. "As soon as all of you can start looking me in the eye again, I'll start talking."  
"We never stopped looking you in the eye." David said.  
"Oh no. That's why when I just confronted Juliette she turned away. Why when I come to lunch none of you try to talk to me. Why when I told all of you, you acted like it was ok, but then started acting different around me."   
"We didn't act different around you, you acted different around us." Ezra said. "Actually you acted the same as you had when you first came here, which is the same, but different then how you had been acting."   
The others all looked at him. "Well thanks for clearing that up EZ." David said sarcastically.  
Ezra rolled his eyes at David. "I'm just saying that maybe it's Shelby that can't accept it."   
"Quit talking about me, like I'm not here." Shelby snapped.  
"Then quit acting like your not." Juliette said. "Look, you've been skipping group and giving everyone attitude lately and we don't want to end up being punished because you can't deal with what happened to you."  
"Oh, so that's it." Shelby said as she finally realized what this was all about. "The only reason you guys called this group was so you could save yourselves." She tightened her jaw, hurt by this. "Nice to know you all care."  
"I didn't mean...." Juliette objected.  
"Yea well, that's what you said." Shelby snapped. "But since we've now determined that I'm the problem, the problem will leave." She said standing to go.  
Daisy stood up quickly and stepped into Shelby's path. "I've always been able to look you in the eye." She said evenly.  
"Yea, well your the only one."   
"That's not true." Daisy said. "They try, but you push them all away. You push me away." A pause. "The only reason we don't know how to act around you is because we never know when your going to go off."  
Shelby scoffed turning her head so she didn't have to look at Daisy.   
Peter could tell the group was getting frustrated and that Shelby was just building more walls. "Shelby," Peter said, hoping that she would talk to them if things calmed down. "They want to understand, but to do that, you have to tell them about it."   
Shelby rolled her eyes sick of having to listen to them and trying to explain that they would never understand. She was fed up with all of the lets talk about it routine.  
"Ok. Fine." She said and turned back around so she could face the entire group. "Anyone here other then Scott and myself ever been sexually abused?" She looked around the group waiting on a response. "Didn't think so." She said her voice full of edge and venom.  
"Anyone here ever have someone put there hand on you when you didn't want them to? Ever had someone touch you where you didn't want then to? Have them breath down your neck? Invade your personal space? Make you dirty?" The cliffhangers had turned their heads unable to stand the tirade that Shelby was laying on them. They all felt convicted under her gaze. Shelby shook her head as she watched them squirm in their seats. "Now," She said upset, "Imagine that you agreed to it and were being paid for it." She paused as she looked around the room at all of the cliffhangers not looking at her, and then said, "Think about how uncomfortable you feel right now and then realize that that doesn't even come close to how it actually feels." With that, Shelby turned and walked out of the room.  
  
Shelby's heart raced as she walked back to her dorm. She didn't know what had made her yell at them like that. Actually she did. She was sick of people thinking they knew what it felt like. Sick of people acting like what she did was wrong. Sick of feeling like what she had done was wrong, sick of the nightmares, the memories, the flashbacks. Shelby opened her mouth and screamed as loud as she could. She was so frustrated she couldn't stand it. When she finished her long scream she felt better. Instead of continuing on to the dorm though, she walks towards the woods. She wanted a cigarette.   
  
Peter walked out of the lodge. Sophie was inside with the cliffhangers, they had continued group, even with Shelby's outburst. Now he wanted to find her and talk to her. During group she hadn't really admitted anything, but Peter knew that Shelby blamed herself and felt guilty. And because of that, she felt like everyone else blamed her too. Peter surveyed the campus, not sure where she'd go. He'd given her a few minutes to calm down, but that had also given her time to get away. He headed for the girl's dorm to see if she was there, but on his way there he noticed someone just inside the woods. They weren't visible, but he could see the smoke.   
Peter took a deep breath and headed for the woods. He hoped that it wasn't Shelby smoking, but knew that there was a good chance it was.   
He walked around the tree and stood in front of Shelby, who leaned against the tree, cigarette in hand. Instead of dropping it and putting it out though, she put it to her lips and took a long drag off of it. She exhaled the smoke after a moment and then dropped the cigarette to the ground and stepped on it.   
"Guess you caught me." She said, her voice revealing nothing.  
"How long you been smoking again?" He asked.  
"Long enough." She said and reached into her pocket and handed him the last of her pack.  
Peter looked at her and took the cigarettes from her outstretched hands. He said nothing, but gave her an imploring look.  
She looked at him for a moment not sure if she should say anything, but knowing she needed to give him something. "So, your here to talk about what I said in group." She said nodding. "Well, as I've said before, it doesn't matter. They don't get it, you don't get it. Scott... Scott doesn't even get it." A pause. "There's no point in reliving it over and over and over again just because no one gets it."  
Peter nodded. He knew he had to tread very lightly or else even the little bit of information that she was offering him, would go away. "I guess," he said stepping towards her, "We're just not sure how your handling it. It's a lot for one person to try to deal with."   
"I'm no normal person. I've been through worse."  
'Just because you've been through worse doesn't mean it hurts less." He said looking right at her.  
  
  
No I would not sleep in this bed of lies -She looks at him with cold hard eyes. "So you know my secret." She says rolling her eyes. "It hurts." She says and then quickly looks away from him.  
  
So toss me out and turn in - "The memories aren't good ones, but you can't change them anymore then I can." she says.  
  
And there'll be no rest for these tired eyes -She pushed herself away from the tree.   
  
I'm marking it down to learning -"I don't want to talk about this anymore."   
  
I am -With that she headed off quickly before he could say anything else.   
  
Don't think that I can take another empty moment - Shelby walks back towards campus quickly so that Peter won't follow her.  
  
Don't think that I can fake another hollow smile - Scott spots her and walks over determined to actually talk to her.  
  
It's not enough just to be lonely. - Scott steps into Shelby's path so that she has to stop walking.  
  
Don't think that I could take another talk about it - Shelby tries to sidestep him not wanting to talk about it, but he won't let her pass.  
  
Just like me, you got needs - Shelby looks at him, she knows he needs and deserves to be able to talk to her.  
  
And they're only a whisper away - She motions to the gazebo, so that they can talk privately.  
  
And we softly surrender - Scott nods and the two walk over.  
  
To these lives that we've tendered away - The two sit down inside the gazebo on a bench.  
  
No I would not sleep in this bed of lies -  
"Shelby, I want you to talk to me." Scott says.  
  
So toss me out and turn in -  
"I told you I'm not ready to talk about it yet." She says not looking at him.  
  
And they'll be no rest for these tired eyes -  
He takes a deep breath. "So what do I do?" he asks.  
  
I'm marking it down to learning -  
She looks at him. "I'm not sure what you mean." She says.  
  
I'm marking it down to learning -  
"Shelby you do know what I mean. The last few weeks you've been taking everything out on me and the other cliffhangers. We didn't do it, Shelby. We're just trying to help."  
  
Cause I can-  
Shelby throws him a look. "I never said you did do it."  
  
Don't wanna be the one who turns the whole thing over-  
"Then why do you keep acting like it's everyone's fault?"  
  
Don't wanna be somewhere where I just don't belong-  
"I don't blame you guys." She says. "You guys didn't do it, I did."  
  
Where it's not enough just be sorry-  
"So that's what this is all about, that you blame yourself." Scott said. "It's not your fault."  
  
Don't you know I feel the darkness closing in-  
"You don't get it." She said. "You don't understand."  
  
Tried to be more than me-  
"I'm accepting who I am, who I'm meant to be." Shelby finishes.  
  
And I gave 'til it all went away-  
"Your not supposed to be like this Shel." he says. "Your supposed to be happy."  
  
And we've only surrendered-  
Shelby looks at him. "I was... I am." She says unconvincingly.  
  
To the worst part of these winters we've made-  
"Your not." He leans in close to her, "And you never will be if you continue like this."  
  
But I would not sleep-  
"I'm just being me." She says.  
  
In this bed of lies-  
"This isn't you." Scott says.  
  
So toss me out, and turn in-  
"You were happy."  
  
And there be no rest for these tired eyes-  
"You were with me."  
  
I'm marking it down to learning-  
"You talked to the other cliffhangers. You had friends." He can see he's not getting through to her.  
  
I'm marking it down to learning-  
"I just don't want you to be like this." He says, wishing he could somehow make this all better.  
  
I am all that I'll ever be-  
"Like what?" She asked. "Like myself?"  
  
When you - lay your hands-  
He reached out and takes her hands. "You're not you. You're not being like you." He says again trying to convince her.  
  
  
Over me-  
Shelby suddenly leans over and kisses him.  
  
And don't go weak on me Please-  
Scott pulls away surprised by her sudden move on him.  
  
I know that it's weak-  
But instead of saying anything, he leans over and kisses her back. Remembering all the times they kissed like this before she'd begun to act like this.  
  
But God help me I need this-  
Shelby wraps her arms around Scott kissing him passionately.  
  
I will not sleep in this bed of lies-  
She begins to think of all their times together, all the times she was happy, all the times she was with him. I can't give in, she tells herself.   
  
So toss me out and turn in-  
Shelby suddenly pushes Scott away from her and then stands. "That's not who I am." She says.  
  
And they'll be no rest for these tired eyes-  
And then she turns and walks away quickly.  
  
I'm marking it down to learning-  
Scott stands watching Shelby walk away, confused by what had just happened.  
  
I'm marking it down to learning-  
Shelby walks towards the docks quickly, trying to hold her emotions in.  
  
Cause I can-  
She looks over her shoulder and sees Scott standing in the gazebo, she knows that she might have pushed him too hard this time.  
  
Shadow Man part 6  
  
Peter walked into the girl's dorm. Shelby was again laying on her bed with her journal. Her face held a blank stare as she stared at the journal.  
"Shelby?" Peter said. Wondering if she was in the same state she'd been earlier.  
She doesn't turn towards him, but instead rolls over, so that she doesn't have to look at him. "Shelby, your father called and I've agreed to you going off campus for dinner, if you want."  
Shelby rolled over so that she was looking at Peter. "Why are you doing this?" She asked.  
Peter was surprised by the question, not sure why she was asking it. "What do you mean?" He asked.  
She sat up and looked up at him. "I mean why would you let me go off campus. I've been skipping group and classes. You caught me smoking." She says. "Under normal circumstances you wouldn't allow it."  
He looks down at her. "These aren't normal circumstances." He says.   
Shelby looked down at the journal she know had placed beside her. She had written several pages in the last few hours about how she felt and everything she was going through. But she'd torn them out. She was still certain no one would understand. And she wanted that more then anything. Someone to understand. Someone to convince her that it wasn't her fault, but she would never tell them that. Never.  
"When will he be here?" She asked.  
'He's on his way now and should be here any minute." He said.  
She looked at him and almost smiled. "You were that sure I'd agree to it?" She asked.  
"I was just hoping." He said with a smile.  
Shelby nodded and then stood. She placed the journal on her desk and then followed Peter out the door and towards the Administration building.   
  
Shelby sat on the front steps of the Administration building waiting on her father by herself. Peter had had a phone call and had went to get it. She yawned and stretched tired from the last few nights of nightmares. She leaned against the railing and closed her eyes.  
Shelby ran across campus trying hard to escape. She was breathing hard and her muscles hurt. She felt like she'd been running forever. Ever since she'd seen him in the lodge, she hadn't been able to stop. He had touched her like Walt had. Had made her dirty.   
She suddenly fell to the ground. As she staggered to get up, she realized he was on top of her. She started to scream, "Get off of me, get away." But he turned her over and grabbed her by the wrists. He pinned her arms to the ground above her head. "Please don't do this." She begged. "I won't tell, I won't ever tell." She said pleadingly, but he still started to rip her shirt open. "Please stop, Please." She said again, but he didn't, he just worked slower. Forcing her to endure more torment.   
After he was done, Shelby laid on the ground next to him, her shirt unfastened and tears streaming down her face. She suddenly feels his hand on her shoulder. "I've already given you what you want, now leave me alone." She said more as a plead, then a command.  
"I haven't gotten my fill." A gruff voice said.  
Shelby began to shake as he rolled her towards him and began to touch her. "Please stop." She begged, her words almost inaudible because of her crying.   
  
Shelby opened her eyes quickly at the sound of the car door. Her face was wet with tears, even though she'd been sleeping. She quickly wiped her face, trying to regain her composure as her father walked towards her.  
He immediately noticed something was wrong. "You ok?" He asked.  
Shelby nodded and then looked up at him. "I'm fine." She said and her voice cracked. She swallowed hard and then repeated. "I'm fine."  
Her father was about to ask her about it, but Peter walked out. "Mr. Merrick, your here." He said walking down the steps and shaking his hand.  
"Yea, sorry I'm late. I got tied up doing business."  
"That's ok, dad." Shelby said, suddenly standing and joining the conversation. Peter's entrance had given her time to regain her composure. "Are you ready to go?" She asked her father.  
Her father looked at her and then at Peter. "Did you need to talk to us first or anything?" He asked not sure the policy of it all.  
"No." Peter said quickly. "You guys just go and enjoy dinner and I'll talk to you when you get back."  
Mr. Merrick nodded and then he and Shelby walked to his car.  
  
Shelby and her father walked over and sat down at a table in Rusty's.   
"It's been a long time since we've had dinner together." Her father said trying to start a conversation. Shelby hadn't said a word to him since they'd left Horizon. She'd just stared out the window the whole drive there.   
"Uh huh." Shelby said absent mindedly. She reached across the table to get her menu and her father reached out and touched her arm.   
A hand grabs Shelby's arm and pulls her into a room.  
Shelby looks at the hand and then at her father, he immediately removes his hand and she moves her arm and crosses it with her other one, almost as though she's cold.  
"I just was trying to get your attention." He said. "You haven't spoken to me hardly at all this evening." He said.  
'I just have things on my mind." She said.  
"Like why your smoking again." He said. Shelby looked at her father wondering how he knew. "Peter told me." He said answering her thought. "He's told me you've made a lot of progress since you came to Horizon, but that lately, you've been slipping into some of your old habits."  
Shelby rolled her eyes and put on her defenses. "It's not a big deal, I'm just dealing with things in my way."  
"No offense Shelby, but you don't always handle thing in the best way." He said.  
'And what does that mean?" Shelby demanded.  
"I just meant you've made some bad choices." He said backtracking on his statement.  
"You mean like prostitution." She said.  
"That wasn't your fault." He said, "You had no choice. Walt was molesting you."  
She shook her head, refusing to listen to him. "I did have a choice and I chose to sell my body for money."  
"You choice was justified." He said calmly.  
She looks at him in disbelief and anger. "Since when is prostitution justified?" She asked angrily. She shakes her head. "I don't even know why you care. You weren't even able to help me."  
"Shelby, I helped you the only way I knew how."   
"I know." She said after a moment. "I'm just trying to deal with all of this."  
Her father nodded understandingly. "I understand." A pause. "You've been through so much. After what Walt did and your time on the streets, no one expects you to just be able to move on."   
"Move on kid. I don't have anymore use for ya." A voice said.  
Shelby shook the thought away. "Let's just order our food." She said and her father nodded knowing she didn't want to talk about it.  
Shelby read over the menu trying to decide what she wanted, but she really wasn't hungry. She looked up towards her father, who was reading his menu as well. Shelby looked around the restaurant, which surprisingly wasn't very busy. She noticed two girls and their mother at one table and a group of boys at another one. The Curtis was at the bar talking to Annie. Shelby heard the bell that hung on the door ring and turned to see who it was.   
She watched as Tom walked into the restuarant accompanied by Walt. The two men looked right at her and gave her wicked grins. Shelby felt her hands begin to shake. her face turned pale and her stomach turned. The two men began to walk around the room, never taken their eyes off of her.  
Shelby reached for her butter knife, knowing she could use it in defense, but her hand shook so bad that she knocked the silverware onto the floor. She kept her eyes on the two men as she bent down to pick the silverware up. As she reached for it, her shoulder bumped into the table shaking her water glass and causing it to fall to it's side and pour across the table.   
Her father immediately up righted the glass and then wiped the mess up before it could spill on either of them. Shelby didn't even notice the glass though. Her eyes stayed focused on the two men that seemed to be circling her.   
"Shelby?" her father asked as he watched his daughter. Her face was pale and he noticed that she was shaking. He followed her eyes, trying to figure out what she was looking at, but he saw nothing. "Shelby?" he asked again and again she didn't answer. He reached out and touched her shoulder.   
Suddenly a third man appeared in line with Walt and Tom. Again Shelby was unable to tell who the third man was. She started to stand for a better view, but realized her father's hand was on her shoulder. She looked at the hand and then realized that he was also saying her name. She followed his arm up to his face and then beyond it as she saw the three figures standing there, mocking her. Shelby followed the path back down until her eyes again landed on her father's face. She looked at her him for a long moment and then shrugged his hand off of her shoulder. She stood quickly before he could catch her and said. "I'm going to the ladies room." Then she quickly walked away.  
Her father watched confused as she went.  
  
Shelby splashed cool water over her face, trying to calm herself down.  
"They weren't there." She told herself, as she starred at her reflection. "They weren't there."  
Suddenly she spotted the two of them standing behind her. She turned around quickly with a gasp. "Your not here." She said, her voice shaky.  
"We are here." Walt whispered. "And we're very real." he said, taking a step towards her. His hands reached out to her and then so did Tom's. Suddenly another set of hands appeared around her waist from behind her, but Shelby didn't know who it was. She struggled against the three of them, trying to break free as they mocked her and touched her. The bathroom door open and suddenly the images disappeared, leaving Shelby standing in the middle of the room shaken and scared.   
'Are you ok?" The women asked when she saw Shelby's face.  
Shelby nodded and then finding her strength took off out of the bathroom quickly. She walked over to the table. "You ready to order?" Her father asked.  
"Actually, I'd like to leave." Shelby said boldly.  
Her father looked at her stunned. "But we haven't even had dinner." He said.  
"I don't feel well and I want to go back to Horizon." She said determined.  
Her father was stunned by this and wondered if he'd done something wrong. "Alright." He said with a nod and then stood and grabbed his jacket off the back of his chair. He followed Shelby, who was almost running,, out of the restaurant.  
  
Shelby and her father arrived back at Horizon quickly and Shelby practically jumped out of the car almost before it stopped and then immediately began to run towards the dock, which had become her sanctuary lately.  
"Shelby!" Her father called after her, not able to figure out what had happened.  
Peter and Sophie who had been talking near the administration building, heard Mr. Merrick and they both turned to see what it was about. They walked over to Mr. Merrick quickly.  
"What happened?" Peter asked.  
"I don't know." Mr. Merrick said confused. "We went to dinner and started to talk about her recent behavior when we got there. She didn't want to talk about it so I dropped it, but then she just seemed to space out. After a few minutes she began to shake and she turned pale. She excused herself to the bathroom and then she came back and demanded that we leave. We didn't even eat." He said.  
Peter nodded. "Mr. Merrick, why don't you go back to your hotel and Sophie and I will call you after we talk to your daughter." Mr. Merrick nodded and then went to his car.  
"What do you think is going on with Shelby?" Sophie asked. "I know she blames herself, but could it really result in this kind of behavior and those kinds of reactions."  
"The behavior seems to fit perfect with her blaming herself, but I'm no longer sure that's the problem. She told me that what happened hurts. So she's acknowledged that pain. She won't deal with it though because she blames herself." A pause. "But I've also found Shelby to be more distant lately." Peter said. "She gets these looks like she's somewhere else."  
Sophie nodded. "I've seen them too in the last few weeks." she said. "You think she's having flashbacks."  
"It would explain a lot." Peter said.   
"Then let's go talk to her." Sophie said and the two headed off to find Shelby.   
  
Peter and Sophie found Shelby sitting on the edge of the dock her feet dangling over the edge. "Shelby?" Peter called.   
Shelby didn't look up, but continued to swing her legs ever so slightly. Her hands gripped the side of the dock tightly. It was the only way she'd been able to keep them from shaking. Peter and Sophie walked closer.   
"Shelby, your father went back to his hotel." Sophie said gently. Shelby just continued to ignore them.  
"Your father said you got ill during dinner, do you need to see the doctor?" Peter asked. Shelby responded with a slight shake of the head. Peter glanced at Sophie. "You want to tell us what has you so upset? Maybe what happened at dinner?" Peter asked. Shelby again shook her head ever so slightly. Peter had never seen her like this before. She seemed to have shut down. "Maybe you should go back to your dorm and rest."   
Shelby gave another slight nod and then she stood and turned and walked away.   
"Wow." Sophie said as she watched her leave, "I don't think flashbacks cause that."  
Peter nodded in agreement. "Neither do I, but she's shutting down and if we don't figure out what's wrong soon, we're going to lose her."  
  
Shadow Man part 6  
Shelby laid on the bed in her dorm. It had been hours since she'd came back from dinner and she hadn't spoken to anyone. She'd barely moved. She rolled over slowly, almost as if it were painful and then sat up. She grabbed her jacket and headed out of the dorm. She started to walk to the docks, but then knew that they would show up there. Instead, she walked across campus. Peter and Sophie had surely left for the evening. She followed the path to the administration building. Most would think at night it would be a bad place to be, but all the counselors that stayed on for night shift, hung out in the lodge. It was closer to the main part of campus.   
  
Any time tomorrow, I will lie and say I'm fine. - Shelby sits on the steps of the admit building. The moon is the only light she has.  
  
I'll say yes when I mean no. - She stares up at it, and lights up a cigarette.  
  
And anytime tomorrow, the sun will cease to shine. - A shadow of a man falls over Shelby, blocking the moonlight.  
  
There's a shadowman who told me so. - She looks up and sees Walt.  
  
Any time tomorrow, the rain will play a part - Shelby just stares at him. Walt leans over and touches her face, running his hand from her cheek, to her shoulder, to her arm.  
  
Of the play I used to know. - Shelby sits tensely doing nothing.  
  
Like no other, used to know it all by heart, - The man changes and now it is Tom.  
  
But the shadowman inside has let it go. - He leans over, taking her hand and kisses her deeply.  
  
Oh no, let go of my hand. - Shelby tries to pull her hand away, but can't free it.  
  
Oh no, not now I'm down, my friend. - She tries to pull away again panicking, but still can't be free.  
  
You came to me anew, or was it me who came to you? - She looks at him, unable to pull away and then kisses him back.  
  
Shadowman… - The man changes to Walt.  
  
Shadowman… - the man changes to the unrecognized face.  
  
Any time tomorrow, a part of me will die - Shelby sits on the steps, the images have disappeared.  
  
And a new one will be born. - She is still smoking the cigarette.  
  
Any time tomorrow, I'll get sick of asking why, - She shakes her head as tears begin to fall  
  
Sick of all the darkness I have worn. - She pulls her knees to her chest rocking back and forth  
  
Any time tomorrow. I will try to do what's right, - The sun rising, Shelby still sits rocking back and forth on the steps.  
  
Making sense of all I can. - Her eyes look haunted and distant.   
  
And any time tomorrow, I'll pretend to see the light. - She lowers her head , shivering as she rocks back and forth  
  
I just might, shadowman… -The shadowy figure is behind her, his hand on her back.  
  
Oh. here's the sun again. -  
She lowers her face as the sun's rays hit her.  
  
Isn't it appealing to recline - She leans back into the shadowy figure.  
  
Get blinded and to go, - He starts to kiss her and at first she accepts, but then she pushes him away.  
  
Into the light again - She again shields her eyes from the sun.  
  
Doesn't it make you sad to see so much love denied? - She stood beginning to jog away from the steps, just as Peter and Sophie pull into the driveway.  
  
See nothing but a shadowman inside. - Shelby turns back not seeing them getting out of the car, but seeing Walt and Tom sitting on the steps. And the shadowy figure stands before her.  
  
Oh no, let go of my hand. - Shelby turns and runs towards the main part of campus. The shadowy figure follows her.  
  
Oh no, not now I'm down my friend. - She runs faster trying to get away, but he stays right with her.  
  
You came to me anew, or was it me who came to you? - She trips when she enter the woods, he falls on top of her.  
  
Shadowman… - She pushes Walt off of her  
  
Shadowman… - She tries to push the now shadowy figure off of her  
  
Ooh, if you're coming down to rescue me, - Peter and Sophie call Shelby's name  
  
Now'd be perfect. - Shelby tries to scream for them, but the shadowy figure covers her mouth.  
  
Please, if you're coming down to rescue me, - Peter and Sophie again call her name  
  
Now'd be perfect. - And again she tries to call, but is muffled  
  
Please, if you're coming down to rescue me, - Peter and Sophie step into the clearing, the image disappears and  
  
Now'd be perfect… Shelby sits up leaning against a tree breathing hard.  
  
"Shelby?" Peter asked concerned. "Are you ok?"   
Shelby sat against the tree trying to catch her breath. She gave a slight nod to Peter and tried to stand up with the help of the tree. But her legs were shaky and she fumbled, barely managing to catch herself. Peter reached out and grabbed her arm, trying to help her steady herself, but the second his hand touched her arm, Shelby pulled back.   
"Don't touch me." She said, her voice low and shaky. She took a deep breath and shakily walked around Peter and Sophie and back to campus.  
Sophie looked at Peter. "She's getting worse." She said upset.  
Peter nodded. "I know." He said. "I just don't know how to get through to her."  
  
The cliffhangers, minus Shelby, we're all sitting around and talking on the main part of campus. Once again there topic was Shelby.  
"I just don't get it." Ezra said. "Things were bad for Shelby and she's been through a lot, but I've never seen her act like this."  
Daisy nodded. "She wasn't even this bad when she went home."   
"She wasn't even this bad when she came back from running." Auggie said.  
"But something must have happened to make her behave like this." Juliette said.  
"Maybe more happened on the street then she's told us." David said.  
Scott shook his head. "I don't think that's it." He said. "I think she told us everything, but that guy attacking her on the street is enough to push anyone with her background over the edge."  
"And I'd certainly say she's gone over the edge." David said. "Especially with how she looks now." The cliffhangers all followed his gaze to where Shelby was heading across campus. They all sat shocked, as Shelby, stumbled across campus. Her face was pale and she had black circles under her eyes. She wore the same cloths that she'd worn the day before and they were wrinkles and dirty from where she'd fallen in the woods a few minutes before.   
"We have to figure out what happened." Scott said determined.  
"Yea, but how?" Juliette asked.   
"I don't know, but we just have to find a way." Scott said.  
  
Shelby stumbled into the girls dorm and grabbed some clothes from her closet and headed to take a shower. She quickly undressed and turned the hot water on. She stepped into the shower and allowed the hot water to wash over her body. It was so hot it was almost burning, but Shelby didn't mind, it helped her mind to stay distracted.  
She suddenly leaned against the wall and slid down. Curling into her usual position, she began to cry.   
After a long time, Shelby stood up and turned the water off. She reached out the shower door and grabbed a towel, which she wrapped around herself. She quickly dried off and got dressed. She then walked out of the bathroom. No one was in the girls dorm, which was a relief. She walked to the doorway and looked around double checking to make sure no one was there. When she was certain she walked back to her bed and grabbed her pillow. She pulled it out of the pillow case and held it on her lap. She ran her hand along the material until she came to a loose string. She pulled ever so slihtly on the string tearinmaking an opening in the pillow. She reached through the opening and felt around. She had been hiding her cigerettes here until Peter had caught her. Now she hid something more valuable here. Her hand reached the cool hard object. She gripped it tightly and then pulled it out of the pillow and laid it down next to her on the bed. She then laid the pillow on the other side of her. She picked up the item and carried it into the bathroom. She closed the door behind her and sat down, leaning against it.  
She opened the journal up and picked up her pen.   
  
I don't know what's wrong with me. I keep thinking I see them everywhere I go. I hear their words and am reminded of them every second.   
No one knows what I've gone through, what it's like to feel guilty for allowing men to take advantage of me.   
When I returned from the streets, I told the others about what had happened about how I'd almost gone back to my old ways. I also told them all about what had happened to me and what I had done on the streets before. I felt good after I told them, like things were going to finally go my way, but then I began to wonder what they thought about what I did. If they wondered what it had felt like. If they thought it was my fault. And as I thought that, I become mad at them all and began to push them away. Then the nightmares started. At first they hadn't been too bad. It would just be the two of them showing up in a random dream. And then the dreams had began to get worse. They'd began to touch me in my dreams and that was when I really began to push everyone away. Because even though I knew it was only a dream, I could still feel their hands on me. And then the nightmares had turned into flashbacks. Words would trigger my memory, and I'd see them. A touch would trigger my memory and I'd remember what had happened. Which is why I hadn't been able to be with Scott. Every time I kissed him, I didn't see him, but one of the men from the street and it made me feel dirty. The way I used to feel. I didn't want to feel that way anymore which is why I can't be with him.   
But then the flashbacks began to become more and more real.. I would be sitting alone somewhere and they would walk into the room. They would talk to me and touch me and mock me. And that's when I gave up. I told myself they weren't real for so long, but they keep coming back. Every time producing the same fear. It feels like it's happening again. Only this time it's even harder, because it's in the one place that I've ever felt safe - Horizon.  
  
Shelby closed the journal and then walked back out into the dorm and put it back into the pillow. She closed the pillow up and placed it back in the case. She then laid down on the bed. She was tired, but wasn't sure she could sleep. She didn't want the nightmares to come back.   
  
I'm sure you're only dreaming - Shelby lays on the bed staring at the ceiling  
  
You're only juggling with my mind - She tries to fight sleep, but her eye lids grow heavy.  
  
While I feel more and more like screaming - Her eyes close and she begins to drift asleep.  
  
For the scar you left behind - She begins to dream, that she is walking down a street.  
  
I'm sure you're only dreaming - She's in California. She's fifteen at the time.  
  
I'm sure we're just a part - She is dressed in her usual work attire and she is reading address numbers as she walks down the crowded sidewalk.  
  
Of what the lucky man believes in - She spots the number and goes into the building.  
  
I'm sure you know this song by heart - She goes to the elevator and rides it to the floor that he is supposed to be on.  
  
You're only dreaming, I think I can hear you talk - She steps off and walks down the hall towards the room.  
  
You're only dreaming, I think I can hear you say, 'shut up' - She can hear people talking in the different apartments.  
  
You're only dreaming, I hope your dream is in me - She stops at number 506 and knocks.   
  
You're only dreaming you're free - Shelby begins to toss and turn as she sleeps almost as if she knows what's about to happen.  
  
You will show up while I'm dreaming - The door opens and the man standing at the door is Walt.  
  
Out of nowhere cross my way - She starts to say something,  
  
You will ask me not to scream and - But Walt puts one finger to his lips, telling her to be quiet.  
  
You will smile and you will say, 'dear friend, - he smiles and opens the door wider so she can step in.  
  
You're only dreaming, I think I can hear you talk - She steps into the room and notices Tom sitting on the couch.  
  
You're only dreaming, I think I can hear you say, 'shut up' - She starts to scream, but suddenly Tom is twisting her arm and telling her to shut up.  
  
You're only dreaming, I hope your dream is in me - She tries to hit him with her free arm, but Walt grabs it.   
  
You're only dreaming you're free - The two men begin to drag her down the hallway of the apartment.  
  
You're only dreaming - They stop in front of a door and Shelby feels a wave of fear pass through her.  
  
You're only dreaming - She struggles to break out of their grasp, but they both tighten their grips.  
  
You're only dreaming, dreaming... - The bedroom door suddenly opens revealing a queen size bed in the middle of the room.  
  
  
You're only dreaming - Tom and Walt shove Shelby into the room and the door shuts tightly behind her.  
  
You're only dreaming - She turns around and grabs the doorknob to open the door, but it seems to be locked. She feels a tap on her shoulder,   
  
You're only dreaming, dreaming - She turns backing against the door, fear paralyzing her from being able to do anything else. The man steps forward reaching for her and Shelby for the first time sees who he is.  
  
Shelby gasps, her eyes flying open as she wakes from the nightmare. She is shaken. It couldn't' have been him. It couldn't have been him, she tells herself over and over again, but it had been. Shelby closes her eyes, almost wanting to see the image again, wanting to somehow be wrong, but when she closed her eyes, she saw the room, herself as a young girl and him. She saw him reach for her, as the little girl pushed herself against the door. She heard him whisper about keeping their secret. Shelby opened her eyes again. She was suddenly cold. She pulled her knees to her chest and began to rock back and forth.  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  



	31. Imagine

Author's note:   
As I mentioned before this series is based on many story arcs, Shadow Man was the beginning of the Shelby/Daisy arc, but trust me all of the characters have a story arc (cliffhangers and counselors).   
Also I plan on working more on the website that I have been talking about, I hope to have it up this weekend. So if you have any ideas let me know. I have quite a few things in the works already.  
To give you a preview of what's ahead: Don't expect anybody to come out of what's happening the same. Shelby may be the one that is going through difficult times, but the other cliffhangers, and the counselors will also be affected by what has happened.   
  
  
  
  
Imagine Part One  
"No one feels another's grief, no one understands another's joy. People imagine that they can reach one another. In reality they only pass each other by."  
Franz Schubert  
  
"Looks like she's not sitting with us again." Auggie said. The cliffhangers, minus Shelby were all sitting at a table in the middle of the cafeteria eating lunch.  
"At least she's eating." Juliette said. "These last few weeks she's gotten almost as bad as I am."  
"She still looks like hell." Ezra said.   
"I can't believe Peter and Sophie can't do anything for her." Scott said shaking his head. "She's been like this for weeks."  
"And her attitudes gotten worse in the last week." David said. "She isn't even speaking to us."  
Daisy glanced over at where Shelby sat in the corner of the cafeteria, wondering if she should mention what she'd seen the night before. "She's been worse since her father visited." Daisy said offhandedly, turning back to the other cliffhangers deciding not to mention the night before.  
"Maybe we should try to talk to her again now that he's gone." Scott suggested.  
"She doesn't even attend group, how are you going to get her to talk to us?" Juliette asked.  
"I don't know." Scott said frustrated. "But there has to be something that we can do for her."  
Daisy turned and looked back at Shelby who was sitting at a back table picking at her food and staring blankly out the window. Daisy turned and looked at Scott, his eyes were also on Shelby, his eyes held the hurt that he felt knowing he couldn't reach her. She suddenly stood. "I have to go somewhere." She said quickly grabbing her tray and leaving before they could ask any questions.  
"I wonder what that was about." David said to the others as they watched Daisy hurry from the cafeteria.   
Juliette stood. "I think I'll go find out." She said and got up hurrying after Daisy. This puzzled the cliffhanger boys more, because Juliette and Daisy weren't close.   
Juliette hurried out the door after Daisy. "Hey Daisy!' She called. "Daisy wait up." She called hurrying after her.   
"What do you want Juliette?" Daisy asked briskly hating that Juliette was following her.  
"I...um... wanted to talk to you about...." Juliette glanced around anxiously, seeing that everything was clear, she finished her sentence, "Shelby." She said softly.  
"If this is about her being mean to you, I really don't want to hear it." Daisy said turning and starting to leave.  
"Daisy wait." Juliette said grabbing Daisy's arm.  
Daisy turned shocked that Juliette had grabbed her arm, but also mad that someone was touching her. "Sorry." Juliette said turning back into her meek self. "It's just... I think I know why Shelby is so freaky lately."  
"Yea because of her trip to the streets." Daisy said, even though Daisy knew it was more then that.  
"No." Juliette said. "Well yes and no." She said looking at the ground. She bit her lip. "Shelby's been having nightmares." She said after a moment.  
"That's nothing new." Daisy said, wondering why Juliette was wasting her time.  
"No." Juliette said. "Like really bad nightmares." She paused. "I've had some things on my mind so I've been up at night and Shelby... well she talks to herself when she's asleep." Juliette said quietly. "And. she... she acts out." She stammered. "Sometimes she cries and sometimes she calls out Scott's name. I've been surprised that she hasn't woken anyone up."  
"Why are you telling me this Jules?" Daisy asked curiously. "I mean why didn't you go to Sophie or Peter?"  
Juliette took a deep breath. "Daisy, I remember this summer when Kat had that kid in her group named Jack that kept seeing things that weren't there. And I remember her talking about the things he did and...." She paused not wanting to say it and then barely above a whisper said, "It's just... Shelby's acting the same way."   
  
Imagine Part 2  
Daisy grabbed Juliette's arm and pulled her behind the side of the lodge so that no one could see them. "Juliette have you told anyone else about this?" She asked urgently.  
"No." Juliette said. "I wasn't sure what to do."  
"Good." Daisy said looking around to make sure no one could hear them. "Juliette I need you to not tell anyone about this."  
Juliette bit her lip. "But shouldn't we tell Peter and Sophie. I mean, Jack was suicidal. What if..." Juliette couldn't bring herself to mention it.  
"This is Shelby we're talking about." Daisy said. "Look if we tell Peter and Sophie, they're going to have to send her to another facility same as with what they did to Jack. I don't want that to happen, do you?"  
"Well..." Juliette said. "No." She finally answered. "But what about Shelby? She could really get hurt or something."  
Daisy looked at Juliette for a moment. "Juliette, if we can find out why Shelby is acting like this we can help her and she won't be sent away. We just need some time. And therefore, I need you to not tell Peter or Sophie or anyone else for that matter. The less people that know the better."  
Juliette bit her lip wondering if this was the right thing. "Are you sure this is right?"  
Daisy looked at Juliette. "Honestly I don't know, but Shelby needs to stay here. And if they know she can't stay."  
Juliette nodded. "Then I won't say anything." She said.  
"Thank you." Daisy said sincerely.  
  
"So what are we going to do about Shelby?" Sophie asked walking around Peter's desk and beginning to rub his shoulders.   
Peter set down his file on his desk and leaned his head back so he was looking up at Sophie. "Well, she seems to be settling back into a normal routine of going to class and meals and such, but she still isn't speaking to anyone and she still stares blankly into space."  
"That doesn't really tell me what to do." Sophie said moving around the chair and sitting on the edge of Peter's desk.  
'Well she doesn't seem to be a harm to herself or others so we give her time. Just like we did before she told us anything." Peter said. "And we watch her carefully to make sure she doesn't become a threat to herself or someone else."  
Sophie nodded and then sighed. "I just can't imagine what this is like for her." She took a deep breath. "I wish I could get through to her."  
"We will Soph." Peter said encouragingly. "We just need to give her time and be available to her."  
  
Daisy walked into the girl's dorm and sat down on her bed wondering what to do. What had happened the night before had made Daisy wonder if Shelby was having hallucinations, but now that Juliette had told her about what she had noticed Daisy was certain.   
I just have to find out why, Daisy thought. She knew that with the way Shelby was acting it wouldn't be long before everyone else began to realize what was happening and once they did, Shelby would be forced out of Horizon. If I can find out why, Daisy thought to herself, I could help her. But Daisy wasn't sure how she was going to do that, after all Shelby wouldn't speak to her or anyone else.   
"Daisy?" Daisy turned when she heard her name.  
"Hey Ezra.' She said turning to face him.   
"I came to see how you were. You left lunch suddenly and then Juliette came back and said you didn't feel well, so I thought I'd stop by." he said.  
'Oh." Daisy said. "I'm really feeling fine, I just have a lot on my mind between Shelby and my dad." She said knowing that that wasn't really a lie.  
Ezra walked into the room. "So have you decided if you're going home for Thanksgiving?" He asked.  
"Not yet." Daisy said sitting up so he could sit on the end of her bed. "I kind of don't want to leave until Shelby starts getting better. I hate that she doesn't trust me, but I hate seeing her like this even more."  
"Yea." Ezra said from where he now sat on the edge of her bed. "Scott's really torn up by all of this. He hates not being able to get through to her."  
"Me too." Daisy said her voice a little emotional. She glanced over at her clock. "We should be getting to class."  
"Yea." Ezra said and then they stood up and left for class.  
  
Daisy sat in class trying to listen to what Jeff had to say, but her thoughts we're on Shelby and what she should do. Suddenly a piece of paper landed on her table. Daisy looked down at it and saw her name. She glanced up and when Jeff wasn't paying attention she unfolded it and began to read it.   
Daisy -  
Do you know something about Shelby? Is that why you left lunch?  
- Scott  
Daisy folded it back up taking a deep breath. She took a sheet of paper and wrote on it.  
Scott -   
Meet me after class at the docks, we'll talk then.  
Daisy  
  
Daisy then passed the letter to Scott quickly so she would be unnoticed. Scott read it and caught her eye and nodded.   
When class ended, Daisy hurried across the room and taking Juliette by the arm, quickly dragged her from the room. 'Daisy!" Juliette cried as Daisy dragged her outside of the building and out of earshot and sight of anyone else.   
"What did you say when you went back to lunch?' Daisy asked. "You promised you wouldn't say anything and now I have Scott wanting to know if I know something."  
"I told them you didn't feel well. I swear that's all I said." Juliette argued defensively.  
"I want to know what you said to them exactly." Daisy demanded.  
Juliette took a deep breath. "I said, 'Daisy doesn't feel well." And David asked "what's wrong with her?" And I said I don't know, maybe it was because we we're discussing Shelby." Juliette suddenly gasped and covered her mouth with one hand. "I'm so sorry, Daisy. I didn't even realize that that's what I said. I'm really sorry."  
Daisy groaned. "No wonder Scott asked. What am I going to tell him?"  
"How about the truth?" Scott said walking up beside them.   
  
Imagine part 3  
Daisy and Juliette both turned with horrified looks and faced Scott.   
"If you two know something about Shelby, I want to know and I want to know now!" Scott demanded.  
"Maybe I should go." Juliette said meekly taking a step back, but Daisy grabbed her arm.  
"You're not going anywhere." Daisy said. 'If you hadn't said anything this would be fine."  
'I said I was sorry." Juliette said.  
"Will you two just tell me what's up with Shelby?" Scott asked angrily.  
Daisy took a deep breath. "We think," She said looking at Juliette and then looking back at him, "That Shelby is having hallucinations."  
"What?' Scott asked.   
"Hallucinations - Visions. You know some people hear voices, other people see things." Daisy said sarcastically. "We think Shelby's seeing things. Like things from her past."  
Scott shook his head. "Shelby isn't some basket case. She just got attacked on the street.' Scott shouted.   
"Scott," Daisy said gently, "Juliette and I have both seen her."  
"Well you saw it wrong!" Scott shouted turning to walk away.  
"Scott!" Daisy called grabbing his arm. Scott turned and looked at her. "We're not wrong."  
Scott shook his arm free and then turned and walked away.  
  
Imagine Part 4  
Shelby walked across campus, just like she used to walk down the street. Her eyes forward, head up, long strides. Never really looking at anyone, trapped in her own misery, and trying to push the thoughts away. She suddenly felt a hand on her arm and she immediately pulled away from it.   
"What do you want?" She asked angrily.  
"I just wanted to see how you were." Scott said, happily surprised that she was actually speaking to him.  
"Yea, well you see me, I'm fine. Now leave me alone." She says and turns and starts to walk away.  
"Shelby." Scott calls. "Wait." He says grabbing her arm.  
'Let go of me." She says looking at him, her eyes steely.  
'No." Scott says boldly. "Look, we need to talk." Scott says, he has to know if what Daisy told him was true.   
Shelby shakes her head and says, 'whatever."  
"Not whatever." Scott says angry, not wanting to be shut out. 'Deal with whatever is bothering you. Talk to me, talk to Daisy, do something other then walk around here looking like your a ghost and acting like nothing is wrong when everyone knows that you have a problem."  
"Look, don't tell me how to live my life!" She snaps as she tries to pull her arm away.  
"You're not living your life, you're pushing all of us aside. We want to help. Let us."  
"I don't need your help.' She says. "So just let go of my arm." She says glaring at him.  
'Shelby..." He says his voice breaking on the word as he stares into her eyes. All he wants to do is help her and she can't seem to let him do that.  
"Just leave me alone." She says still trying to free herself of his grasp.  
Scott looks at her and not knowing what else to do, just puts his arms around her and hugs her. For a moment Shelby stays in his arms, feels his warmth, wanting to feel his love once more and then she remembers...  
'Get off me." Shelby says suddenly, her voice low and angry.  
"What?" Scott asks looking down at her astonished.  
"Get off of me Walt." She shouts and pushes him hard.   
Scott stumbles backward partially from shock and partially from force. Losing his balance he stumbles to the ground and stares at Shelby realizing that Daisy was right. Shelby looks at him for a moment, her face changes and then she turns and begins to run towards the woods hard and fast.   
  
Memories are just where you laid them - Shelby stumbles over a branch and falls.  
Dragging waters till the depths give up their dead - She gets back up quickly though and continues running.  
What did you expect to find? - She stops, doubled over and breathing head.   
Was it something you left behind? She looks back towards horizon wondering if someone is following her.  
Don't you remember anything I said when I said, - Daisy and Scott walk into Peter's office and sit down across from Peter and Sophie.  
Don't fall away, - They both look anxious.  
And leave me to myself - Shelby still breathing hard collapses to her knees as she begins to cry.  
Don't fall away, - Daisy and Scott tell Peter and Sophie about Shelby.  
And leave love bleeding in my hands, - Peter and Sophie's faces change as they listen to what the two say.  
In my hands again, - Peter and Sophie dismiss Scott and Daisy.  
Leave love bleeding in my hands, - They exchange a few words and then head out of the office.  
In my hands, - Peter and Sophie head hurriedly into the woods to find Shelby,  
Love lies bleeding... They find her crying on the ground after a few minutes.  
Oh hold me now, - Sophie kneels besides Shelby and puts her arm around her.  
I feel contagious.. - But Shelby pushes her away.  
Am I the only place that you've left to go? Shelby covers her face crying harder.  
She cries that life is like some movie black and white. - Peter kneels near Shelby also. He touches her shoulder in a comforting gesture  
Dead actors, vacant lies, Over, and over, and over again she cries.. - But once again Shelby pulls away. This time standing and taking several steps backward.  
  
"Shelby," Sophie says gently. "It's Sophie and Peter and we're just here to help."  
"I don't need help." She says anxiously her eyes shifting back and forth. "I don't need help." She repeats and then she pulls her arms around herself suddenly cold.  
Peter looks at Sophie for a moment wondering the right way to talk to Shelby. "Shelby," He says gently. "We know that your having flashbacks. That your seeing things." Shelby glances at him for a brief second. "The only way to get them to stop Shelby is if you talk about it. The only way to make them stop is by taking their power away and you do that by talking about it."  
"I don't want to talk about it." She stammers. "I don't want to..." Her voice trails off and she suddenly collapses to the ground.  
"Shelby!" Sophie gasps.  
  
Imagine next part 5  
  
"Do you think she'll be ok?" Sophie asked Peter as the two sat outside the door of the infirmary.   
"Physically she'll be fine, but emotionally, she's still very damaged." Peter said looking at Sophie. "She was given a sedative to help her get some sleep. That might help her be able to talk to us."  
"I just can't believe we didn't notice this sooner." Sophie said with a sigh.  
"Anyone could have over looked it Soph." He said. "Besides she was keeping to herself, so it wasn't easy to spot the visions that she was having."  
"So what do we do now?" Sophie asked. "Horizon isn't equipped to handle cases of this nature."  
Peter nodded. "For the moment she can stay here. I don't think she's psychotic Sophie. I think this has been triggered by something that's happened. It could have been her trip to the streets or it could have been her father visiting." He shook his head, for a moment feeling responsible. "It could have been a number of things. If we can get her to tell us, then we can help her."  
  
"We made the right choice Scott, didn't we?" Daisy asked. The two were sitting in the gazebo and had been since they saw Peter carry Shelby back onto campus and into the infirmary.  
"I don't know." Scott said shaking her head. "What if they can't help her? What if they have to send her away?"   
"Peter and Sophie will do all they can for her Scott. They will." She said trying to convince herself as well.  
"I just can't believe this is happening. This explains so much of her attitude lately."  
"But we still don't know why she's having them." Daisy said. "This could just be the beginning of a long process."   
Scott turned and looked at Daisy knowing she was right. He shook his head, wondering if things were ever going to get better.  
  
Imagine 6  
Peter leaned back and stretched. It was late in the evening and he had fallen asleep in the chair. Glancing over he noticed that Shelby was sitting up in bed.  
"Your awake." He said quietly, wondering how she was doing.  
"Yea." She said softly not bothering to look at him.  
Peter sat up and turned so that he was looking at Shelby. "You know that I'm Peter right?" He asked wanting to make sure she wasn't having a hallucination.   
"Yea." She said with a slight nod. She turned her head so she was looking at him and he noticed that there we're tears rolling down her face. "Peter, why is this happening?"  
He looked at her sadly. "I don't know Shel." He said sorry that he couldn't give her an answer. "Do you want to tell me how this all started?"  
"Not really." She said turning away from him.   
'Unless you confront it..." He started to say.  
Shelby cut him off, "I know it won't go away." She laid back down on the bed then and stared at the ceiling, which Peter took as a sign that she didn't want to discuss it. But after a few minutes Shelby spoke up. "I want to see my father."  
This surprised Peter. "Shelby, I'm not sure..."  
"I want to see my father." She said determinedly.  
Peter took a deep breath. "Shelby, if that's what you want I can call him." Shelby nodded still facing the wall. "Maybe we should talk about this?" He said.  
Shelby shook her head. "I speak to know one until I see my father."  
Peter thought for a moment and then gave a slight nod of agreement. "I'll call him as soon as I can, why don't you get some rest."  
Shelby nodded and rolled over facing away from him pulling the blanket tightly around herself.   
  
Imagine part 7  
"Mr. Merrick, Shelby has requested to see you." Peter said. "I've already explained to you what's been going on and Shelby refuses to talk to anyone, but you." Peter shook his head as he listened to the other man. 'No. She wants to see you in person. Mr. Merrick if money is a problem I can find a way to fund the ticket and to reimburse you for the missed work." He paused listening to the other man. "It is that important Mr. Merrick. If she doesn't get help soon, there's a chance the hallucinations might never stop." Peter waited for the man's reaction. "Thank you Mr. Merrick. I'll see you this afternoon then."   
Peter hung up the phone and hurried from the office, only to find Sophie waiting for him right outside the door. "I thought you we're with Shelby?" He said.  
"I let Roger stay with her." Sophie looked at the floor for a moment. "I can't stand seeing her like this. It's driving the cliffhangers crazy that they can't see her."  
"We'll she doesn't want to see them or talk to them until she sees her father. Luckily he'll be showing up this afternoon."  
"Do you think this will help?" Sophie asked concerned. "What if it makes things worse?"  
"Sophie, as you said earlier, Horizon doesn't normally deal with cases like this. Right now I'm going by instincts and hoping that we'll come out ahead and not end up harming Shelby more then we've helped."  
"So I guess that means we just have to wait and see." Sophie said.  
"Yea." Peter answered. "Let's round up the cliffhangers and talk to them about what's going on. Maybe they'll calm down if they hear the latest." Sophie nodded and the two headed off to find the cliffhangers.  
  
"You guys have all noticed a change in Shelby since she came back to Horizon." Peter said to the group of cliffhangers before him. "We'll we've discovered why." The cliffhangers all looked at each other. Except for Juliet, Scott and Daisy who already knew what was going on. "I am not at liberty to tell any of you the specifics of what is going on, but I can tell you that it's possible Shelby may have to leave Horizon to undergo a different level of therapy."  
"Leave Horizon?" Scott asked. He'd always known it was a possibility, but now hearing it from Peter it made it real.  
"Peter, she can't, she needs us." Daisy protested.  
"If her condition," Peter said, "Doesn't improve, Horizon is not equipped to deal with such cases."  
"What kind of cases?" David asked. "Has Shelby gone off the deep end, is she suicidal? I think we have a right to know what is going on with our friend."  
"I can't tell you." Peter said regrettably.  
"You can't, but I can." Daisy said determinedly. "She's seeing things. Things from her past. Like Walt."  
"What do you mean, seeing things?" Ezra asked.  
"You can say something to her and she'll think that your someone else, because she doesn't see you, she sees him." Daisy says. 'Or someone else."  
"I still don't think I get it." Ezra said.  
"Ezra, you've been high before." David said. "Didn't you ever think you we're talking to someone and then as the trip wears off you realize it's not there."  
"Well, yea." Ezra says.   
"Same thing, minus the pharmaceutical aid." David said.  
"Gotcha." Ezra said finally catching on.  
"How did she end up this way?" Auggie asked turning to Peter and Sophie.  
"We're not sure. She's refusing to see anyone or talk to anyone until she sees her dad. Unfortunately, we missed some of the signs so we're unable to pinpoint exactly when it all started." Sophie said.  
"What do we do to help her?" Scott asked.  
"Well," Peter said, "Shelby isn't like most people who just begin to see things out of the blue. This has been triggered by something. If we can get her to confront that and talk about it, then there is a good chance that she'll be able to get past it."  
"It's not that different from when I fell in the cave." Juliet said quietly. "When I thought the girl was real. Shelby just needs to find away to work everything that's going on in her head out."  
"It is very much like that Juliette." Peter said. "And just like that, we have to be careful to not push too much." A pause. "But her father is coming this afternoon to see her and hopefully it will do her some good. Until then," He said, "The rest of you should go to class and try to go on the best that you can. Sophie and I are still here for you to talk to, as well as the other counselors." The cliffhangers all stood doing as they we're told, still trying to comprehend the news.  
Sophie waited until the cliffhangers left before speaking. "So do you think they'll be ok if Shelby has to go?"  
"I don't know. We'll just have to wait and see."  
  
Imagine Part 8  
"Ok, I'll be right outside if you need me." Peter said. Shelby's father had shown up and Peter had allowed Shelby his office for the two of them to talk. He had tried to convince Shelby to let him stay but she'd insisted they speak alone. Peter was feeling a little better about the whole situation; some of Shelby's fight had come back when she was preparing herself to speak to her father. Peter took a deep breath, giving one last nod in Shelby's direction and then left closing the door behind him.  
Shelby looks at her father for several moments not saying a word. He is becoming uncomfortable under her gaze. "You want to tell me what this is all about?" He asks breaking the silence first.  
She looks at him for a long moment, considering for a moment about what she is going to do.   
"Shelby." Her father says, annoyed that she isn't telling him what is going on. "You know, I came here to see you and at first you were angry and then you were ok with it and then you were distant and wouldn't speak to me. I think I have a right to know what's going on. Especially since it was you who insisted on me coming here again. So speak to me." He said.  
"You wouldn't want me to, if you knew what I was about to say." She said looking him right in the eye.  
'What does that mean?" he asked.  
"It means your not going to like what I have to say." She said evenly.   
"Shelby, your mother said you were over dramatic, but come on." He said.  
"So now the truth comes out. I knew your caring sensitive routine wasn't for real."  
Her father shook his head in disgust. "Shelby I don't know what you're talking about."  
"Funny how all of you act the same when I confront you." She said.  
"I don't think this is funny at all. As a matter of fact, I think it's ridiculous." He said growing angry.  
"I would think that after all this time, you would at least be willing to take me seriously."   
"Take you seriously." he said in astonishment. "This coming from the girl who showed up on my porch steps a year and a half ago stoned and saying she'd been working as a prostitute."   
Shelby shook her head in anger. "I bet that was a relief to you." She said taking a step closer. "I bet you were relieved to know that's what I'd been up to. I bet you were glad when you found out that Walt had abused me. It probably made you feel like what you had done wasn't all that bad."  
"Shelby I don't know what you are talking about." He said turning away from her.  
"You do know what I'm talking about." She said getting in his face. "You thought I'd forget, but I remember. I remember." She said. He turned his head. "Look at me." She said. He looked up and there eyes met. "I remember." She said slower this time.   
"Shelby I never...." he said.  
"You did.' She said cutting him off. "Don't deny it.' She said, tears threatening to spill over, but she wouldn't let them. "You did it and I remember. I remember every time, every place, and every second. And you won't get away with it."  
He shook his head. "I don't know what..."  
"You would come into my room at night. The same way Walt did after you. The same way the men did after you. Doesn't it matter that you did that to me? I spent years doing drugs, selling my body, feeling ashamed, and feeling guilty. Feeling worthless." She took a step towards him. "And you, you knew everything that you'd done to me. You wanted to play it off like you weren't the first. Like you were the good guy. But your not. You're worse then Walt and the men on the street because you tried to stay in my life acting like you did nothing. But you can't deny this any more, because I remember now." She watched as his face changed. He seemed to grow about ten years older in just a few seconds. The light went out of his eyes and breath seemed to leave his body so that he was hunched over.   
"I always knew one day you would." He said sadly. "I know that I can't apologize or change what I did. Especially since I came up here hoping you had forgotten, hoping that you wouldn't remember." He looked at Shelby who stood there shocked and hurt and not knowing what to do. She hadn't thought he'd admit it. She knew he'd done it, but she hadn't thought he'd admit it. She hadn't thought that he'd say anything to that. He took a step towards her, putting his hand out, but she stepped back.  
"No." She said and stepped back a few more feet. She backed up into Peter's desk and was happy to be able to lean against it. "Stay where you are." She said, her voice cracking on the note.  
"Let me explain." He said trying to step towards her.  
"Explain?" She asked. "You can't explain this." She said looking up at him, her eyes filled with enormous hurt. "You molested me." She said. "You were the first to take everything away from me. And then you left, allowing Walt to pick up where you left off." She looks up at him. "Get out." She says her voice shaking.   
"Shelby, I was sick." He says.  
"Get out." She repeats a little louder this time.   
"I..."  
"Get out, get out, get out!" She screams at him. Peter hears and rushes into the room. Scott stands in the doorway.  
"Shelby are you ok?" Peter asks rushing to her side.  
"Make him leave." She says to Peter crying.  
"Mr. Merrick you need to go." Peter said evenly.  
"Shelby I'm sorry." He said, once again reaching out for her, but Shelby pulled away. He reached down and grabbed his jacket off the chair and then slowly took a few steps toward the door. Halfway there he turned around. He opened his mouth to say something, but nothing came out. What kind of man was he? How could he tell her anything? Even if he said he never touched her sister that would only cause more pain. She was his daughter.... how could he call himself a father to her. He looked at her as she cried in pain. And suddenly he didn't see her, but the little girl she'd been when he'd done this. A defenseless five year old who only wanted to make him happy and to be loved. How could he have done this to her? Guilt overwhelmed him. He could never pay for his crimes the way that she was paying for them now. "Goodbye." He says softly and then walks out the door.  
"Shelby are you ok?" Peter asked. "What happened?" He asked again trying to get Shelby to say something, but she said nothing.   
"I need to go." She said. "I have to be alone right now." She said pulling away from Peter.  
"Shelby I don't think that's a good idea." Peter said.   
"I ... I ... I don't know what to do." She said as emotion began to overwhelm her. She put her hand over her mouth as sobs began to rack through her body and she tried to catch herself as her knees buckled beneath her causing her to hit the floor.  
Peter quickly knelt and put his arms around her. "It's ok." He said. "Your safe."   
  
Scott watched as Shelby's father walked down the stairs of the Administration building. He hadn't expected him to be leaving so soon, had no idea why Shelby had wanted him here. He had at first thought it was a bad idea, but he know saw it as an opportunity. Scott had to know if the man had caused Shelby's down fall.   
"Mr. Merrick?" He called, jogging over to him.   
Mr. Merrick turned facing the blonde haired boy. He hadn't met him. "May I help you?" he asked, barely aware of what he was saying.  
"Mr. Merrick," Scott wasn't sure what to say so he finally said, "How is she?"  
"In a great deal of pain."   
Scott inhaled sharply, finding tears threatening to spill over. "Do you know why?"  
Mr. Merrick knowing his own guilt couldn't bear to tell the boy in front of him. Kids his age didn't need to know of such things. He looked into Scott's eyes. "Sometimes parents do horrible painful things to their children. Things that can't be made up for or forgiven." he said regrettably. "I made a mistake." He said barely above a whisper.  
Scott looking into the man's eyes, wondering what he meant. He could see a great deal of pain in the man that stood before him.   
"Tell her, I'm sorry. And that she doesn't have to forgive me." He said before turning and going to his car leaving Scott wondering what had just happened.  
  
Imagine Part 9  
Hours later, Peter and Sophie stand in the infirmary watching Shelby sleep. They'd had to give her a sedative to calm her down. Nobody knew what had happened.  
Roger walked into the infirmary. "Peter," He said.  
"Yea, Rog?" Peter asked.  
"Curtis is here, He needs to see you it's urgent." Roger said. Peter looked at Roger curiously.   
"Could this day get any worse?" Peter muttered.  
"Want me to come with you?" Sophie asked, taking Peter's hand.  
"Yea." He said giving her a thankful look. 'Roger can you keep an eye on Shelby?"  
'Yea." He said and took a seat next to her bed.  
Peter and Sophie walked out to the porch where Curtis stood. Peter immediately noticed the somber expression on his face.  
"Curtis what is it?" Peter asked.  
"Well," Curtis said. He didn't know how to say this, he never quite could get used to giving bad news. "We had a suicide in town."  
Peter groaned, feeling horrible that this had happened and wondering how the family would take it.   
"That's awful." Sophie said shocked as much as Peter was.  
"Yea, well, it gets worse." Curtis said.   
Peter looked at Curtis. "How much worse?" He asked somberly not really wanting to know the answer.  
"The suicide was a man. A man who had come to visit a student." Curtis said.  
"Shelby's dad." Peter said knowingly, closing his eyes and trying to digest all of this. His first thought was of Shelby. And how he would tell her and how this would effect her.  
"Oh my god." Sophie said. Her thoughts immediately went to Shelby as well. "This will crush her."  
"Peter," Curtis said reaching into his pocket and pulling out an envelope. "He left a note." He said reaching the envelope out so Peter could take it. Peter reached out and took it. He looked down and saw that it was addressed to Shelby. Again he groaned. What was he going to do? What was Shelby going to do?  
"Does the rest of her family know?" Peter asked.  
"I thought you might want to tell them." Curtis said, actually hoping that he wouldn't have to tell them, that Peter would.   
Peter nodded. "I'll take care of it." A pause. "But I can't do it tonight. Shelby's been through too much and she might want to tell her family, so if you could give me some time...." Peter's voice trailed off as Curtis nodded.  
"All the time you want. I'll make sure a name is not put with the case until the family is notified."  
"Thanks." Peter said and then watched as Curtis left. Peter slapped the envelope against his hand a few times. 'So now what do we do?" he asked.  
"Well, she can't handle hearing this tonight." Sophie said. "But she should hear it first thing in the morning. If we wait things will only be worse."  
"I know." Peter said. "But she has so much to deal with already. That trip back to the streets really took a toll on her and then her father shows up out of the blue. Then the visions, and whatever happened earlier. She told him to leave, she may end up feeling like it was her fault." Peter said looking at Sophie.   
"Well we'll just have to do all we can to help her, Peter. She's gotten through a lot so far, she can do it again." Sophie said putting her arm around him. "She will." Peter took a deep breath.   
"We should go back in." He said, Sophie nodded and the two headed for the door.  
  
Shelby woke the next morning, her head throbbing. She rolled over wondering where she was. She noticed Peter and Sophie standing right outside the open door and realized she was in the infirmary. She started to sit up, but her body wouldn't let her. She put her hand to her head, feeling like she had a headache from a hang over. And in a way she did. What had happened last night had left her with an emotional headache. Her body was numb though and so was her heart. Which Shelby was happy about because right now she couldn't deal with feeling anything towards what had happened the night before.   
"Morning." She called as she lay back down on the bed.  
Peter and Sophie walked back in.   
"Hey." Sophie said walking over and leaning over the bed. 'How you feeling?"  
"Like I have a hang over." She tried to sit up and managed to with Sophie help. She leaned against the headboard. "What was in that sedative?" She said making a joke.  
Peter and Sophie looked at each other, surprised she remembered and surprised she was making a joke.   
"Yea, I remember." She said catching the look between the two of them.   
"You want to talk." Sophie started to ask.  
"No, I don't." Shelby said. "Actually I would like to be run over by a freight train and put out of my misery." She said rubbing her hand over her face to wipe away some of the dried tears from the night before. "That was just a joke." She said looking at the two them. "Gees, you have to be sedated two nights in a row and everyone loses their sense of humor."   
"Shelby this is serious." Peter said.  
Shelby rolled her eyes, which hurt her head. 'Ow." She said putting her hand to her head. "I know, Peter." She said after a moment. "But... I don't know. I can't think straight right now."   
"It's ok." Peter said. "We'll give you some time." He said. "But we have to tell you something and you need to hear it soon."  
From the look on their faces Shelby knew what it was. She didn't know how, but she knew. "When?" She asked.  
"When what?" Peter asked thrown off guard.   
"When did my father die?" She asked.  
  
Imagine part 10  
Peter and Sophie starred at Shelby how had she known?   
"Uh..." Sophie said as she looked at Peter.  
"He uh, didn't die Shel." He said softly. "He killed himself." He looked at Shelby who was still emotionless. "I'm really sorry Shel." He said gently.  
'Why?" She asked looking Peter in the eye. "Did you know him?"  
"Well, no." Peter said flustered.  
"Then obviously you don't know what a service he did to the world last night." She said. And with that she rolled over onto her side looking away from Peter and Sophie.  
Peter looked at Sophie unable to comprehend what had just happened. He motioned for Sophie to step outside with him. Peter sent Roger back in to keep an eye on Shelby and he and Sophie headed outside to talk.  
"What in the world did her father do that was so horrible?" Sophie asked when they were out the door.   
"I don't know." Peter said. "She's putting up a front right now. Between last night and today her emotions have probably just shut down. We'll have to continue to keep a close eye on her. When everything begins to hit, it's going to be rough."  
  
"Shelby's father committed suicide." Scott said as he walked up to Daisy in the kitchen.  
"What?" She asked shocked.  
"Last night."  
"How's Shelby?" She asked immediately concerned about her friend.  
"I don't know." Scott said. "I overheard Peter and Sophie talking. Peter thinks she's in shock. Something happened last night between her and her dad and she's been through so much. I think they may think it's best to send her away."   
Daisy stood there for a moment not sure what to say or how to comprehend what Scott was saying to her. "I'm going to see her." She said and put down the dishes she was cleaning and took off her apron as she headed out the door at a run.  
  
"Daisy, I don't think you should see Shelby now. She's been through a lot." Peter said.  
"Yea, well I'm her best friend and I want to see her."  
"She's going to be ok. We just have to give her some time to sort things out." Sophie said.  
"I can help her." Daisy said. "Just please.... I can. You don't know how we are with each other."  
"We do." Sophie said looking at the young girl knowing she was hurting for her friend. "But this is the best thing."  
"The best thing is us being together. Her father just committed suicide, she's having hallucination, and she went back to the streets and was attacked. She's been through enough things on her own, do you really think it's a good idea to isolate her now?" Daisy challenged.  
Peter looked at Sophie. "Alright, but you can't be long." Sophie said.  
'Thank you." Daisy grunted pushing her way past them and into where Shelby was.   
  
"Hey." Daisy said walking into the infirmary and over to Shelby's bed.  
Shelby rolled over so she could see Daisy. "Hey." She said.  
"How are you doing?" Daisy asked.  
"Don't know." Shelby said sitting up. "I don't feel anything right now." She pulled her knees up to her chest. Daisy looked at Shelby for a long moment, wanting nothing more then to help her friend through this. "You told them?" Daisy looked up at Shelby, surprised by the question.   
Daisy took a deep breath. "Juliet and I figured it out and then when you freaked out on Scott, me and him went to Peter and Sophie." Daisy explained not looking at Shelby.  
Shelby gave a slight nod. "Are they going to send me away?" She asked staring at the wall directly across from her.  
"They've been talking about it. Horizon isn't equipped to handle the visions you've been having."  
"In other words I'm too screwed up even for Horizon."  
"Shelby." Daisy's voice pleaded. "I know you can get through this."  
"You don't know everything." Shelby said, causing a chill to go down Daisy's spine. "I need to rest."  
"Shelby, we're all still here for you." Daisy said knowing she hadn't gotten through to Shelby.  
"I need to rest." She said and lay down and turned away from Daisy.  
Daisy nodded to Shelby's back and then turned and walked out of the room.   
"Daisy?" Sophie asked, as the young girl walked out of the room.  
Daisy said nothing, but instead pushed past the two adults and out of the infirmary running across campus until she couldn't run any more. Then she stopped and cried.  
  
Imagine Part 10  
That night Shelby rolled over in bed. In a few weeks everything had changed. Horizon had been her sanctuary and now it was as bad as any other place she had ever been. Scott had been her boyfriend and she'd given that up, but that had been her own choice. She just knew it would end eventually.   
Shelby looked over at someone who was sleeping in the chair. They all thought Shelby had taken a sedative and was asleep, but she'd not actually taken it. She didn't want to sleep. She wanted to leave. To leave all the horrible memories that now seemed to plague Horizon. Just like they had plagued her home and her room and the streets and her mind.   
She would miss Daisy. But then Daisy had let her down like everyone else. She'd gone to Peter and Sophie. Told them what was going on. Shelby left the infirmary wearing the cloths she'd changed into: jeans and a sweatshirt, and carrying a jacket. She would normally take more with her, but she wanted nothing to remind her of the place. Nothing to remind her of anything.   
She walked across campus and into the woods. She walked through the woods for a while, until she was far enough away to walk out to the main road. 


	32. Life Goes On

Life goes on   
"To go forward in the face of overwhelming odds is to risk failure. But the person who risks nothing cannot learn, feel, change, grow or love. Only a person who risks is free." --The Dilemma   
  
Life Goes On Teaser (Morning)   
  
"I just don't think is the best time for me to go, Peter." Daisy said. She was sitting across from him in his office.   
Peter stood up walking around and sitting on the edge of his desk. "I know that you don't want to go home with Shelby still missing," He said, "But Daisy, it's been weeks.' He said looking down. "We have no leads as to her whereabouts. And as of right now, even though we haven't given up, I think that unless Shelby wants to be found, she won't be."   
"So in other words you don't think you'll find her." Daisy said her voice conveying how she felt.   
"Daisy, I know this has been hard on you. It's been hard on everyone." Peter said thinking of the other cliffhangers. "But… maybe going home for a few days would be a good idea. I know you and your dad are trying to work things out and with everything that's been going on around here with Shelby it might be good to get away for a few days."   
Daisy looked up at Peter surprised. "Are you encouraging me to run from my problems?" She asked with a slight smirk on her face.   
Peter looked down at her. He never wanted to encourage any of his students to back away from their problem, but sometimes they did need a break. "No I'm suggesting a break. Besides it's not running," He said walking back around his desk. "You'll be working on building your relationship with your dad. It's more of a shift in problems."   
Daisy rolled her eyes. "Well since you put it that way." She said.   
"You'll go?"   
"Yes." Daisy said with a sigh as she stood. "I haven't seen him since he visited. Maybe something has changed."   
Peter nodded. "I think the two of you have a shot at working this out as long as you're both willing to try."   
Daisy nodded and turned to head out the door. She stopped, her hand on the doorknob. "Peter," She asked softly, "What if she comes back and I'm not here?"   
"You didn't make her run Dais."   
"I didn't stop her." Daisy said turning around.   
"Does that make me guilty too?" Peter asked. "I didn't stop her either."   
Daisy looked at him. "You didn't break her confidence. Scott and I betrayed her. We told you what was going on."   
"Daisy if you hadn't there's a good chance that Shelby would have been much worse off."   
"Worse off? She ran, she's not even here to get help." Daisy said angrily. "What if she's still having flashbacks, what if she hurts herself? Her father killed himself and she ran. She's freaking out and no one is there to help her."   
"I know this is hard Daisy." Peter said. "Trust me, I feel the same way, but… the only thing we can do now is hope that she'll come back. Or that she'll try to find the help that she needs."   
'But what if she doesn't Peter? What if she's out there selling herself again? If she comes back... when she comes back, she might not be Shelby any more." Daisy said.   
"Daisy," Peter said, wondering what he could say to calm her about this situation. "Daisy, right now we're doing everything we can. And when Shelby comes back we'll do everything we can then."   
Daisy gave a slight nod. She knew Peter was trying to be honest while still offering hope, but Daisy wasn't sure this situation had any hope left to it. "I guess I'll go and begin preparing to go home."   
Peter nodded. "Your father will be here in the morning, just like he said."   
Daisy again nodded and then turned and left. Peter flopped back into his chair and sighed. What was he supposed to do?   
  
"Hey sweet thing, you want to give me what I paid for or what?"   
Shelby turned at the sound of the man's voice. "Give me a second Jake." She said aggravated. "I have other customers you know."   
The man frowned at her and then a lopsided grin appeared on his face. "But of course I'm your favorite, right?"   
Shelby reached out and patted Jake on the hand. "In your dreams." She said coyly before pushing herself away from the bar counter and heading into the kitchen. The other men sitting behind the bar all gave catcalls. Ever since the new girl had come to the bar, things had livened up.   
"You shouldn't be giving my girl a hard time." Bobby, a tall brown haired twenty two year old said, as he sat down on a bench next to the thirty-year-old Jake.   
"You and Patty dating?" Jake asked.   
Bobby looked at Jake for a moment. "We're staying together." He said pointedly.   
"She any good?" Jake asked, eyeing the young man.   
"Jake, your crude." Bobby said, causing the man to grin, almost as though he were proud of his crudeness. "One day, someone is going to come in here and take that grin off your face." He said standing up as Patty walked back into the room.   
Shelby leaned over and handed Jake his drink and food. "Here's what you ordered." She said, and then she turned to Bobby. "Hey honey." She said and gave him a quick kiss on the cheek.   
"Patty, are you coming home anytime soon. You've been here for almost twelve hours."   
Shelby smiled at Bobby. It had taken her awhile to get used to the name Patty, but she knew better then to use her own name and Patty wouldn't be using it anytime soon. "I'm unfortunately working a double. But I'll be home in about three hours when it ends."   
Just then an older, bigger man walked in from the kitchen. "Hey Bobby." The man said.   
"Mr. Granger." Bobby said in greeting. "You mind given my girl a few minutes for a break? She's been here for hours."   
Mr. Granger looked at Bobby and then Patty. "You can have a break, Sandy will be here in a few minutes, so go ahead."   
Shelby smiled at Mr. Granger, "Thanks." She said and Bobby grabbed her hand walking her around the bar and then the two headed outside to get some fresh air.   
Once outside, Shelby immediately lit up a cigarette. "You should quit smoking those, there bad for you." Bobby said, stepping behind her and starting to give her a back massage.   
"Oh, that feels good." She says as he rubbed her shoulders. She closed her eyes and inhaled from her cigarette. "And I'll quite smoking as soon as you do."   
Bobby laughed. "Should have known you'd point out my hypocrisy."   
"Someone has to keep you in line."   
"I'm just glad it's you." He said leaning over and kissing her shoulder slightly.   
Shelby tried hard not to stiffen, but she still hated having people touch her. "Sorry." Bobby said, realizing what he was doing. "I didn't mean to make you uncomfortable."   
"No." Shelby said turning around to face him. "It's not you. I'm fine. I'm just not ready yet." She said.   
Bobby nodded and then gave her a slight smile. "Patty, I might have only known you for a few weeks, but… I think I love you."   
  
Act One (Morning still, but slightly later)   
Daisy walked towards her father's car carrying two large duffel bags. Ezra followed her carrying a smaller bag.   
"You know Daisy, I don't really think you need all this stuff for four days." Ezra said.   
"Your right." Daisy said looking at Ezra. "But some of the stuff I don't need anymore so I am taking it home."   
Ezra nodded. "Makes sense."   
"Here let me help you with that." Mr. Liponowsky said as Daisy tried to lift one of the bags into the trunk. Daisy and Ezra gladly let him finish putting the luggage into the trunk.   
"Well, guess that's everything." Daisy said looking at Ezra.   
"You ready for this?" Ezra asked Daisy. She hadn't been home since she had come to Horizon. At least not to stay, she'd gone home for the funeral though.   
"I hope so." Daisy answers. "I wish that Shelby was here. It would make this easier. What am I going to do if she comes back and I'm not here?" She asked.   
"Daisy if Shelby shows up, I will personally call you." Ezra answered. "Don't worry about it."   
"I can't help but worry about it." Daisy answered just as the other cliffhangers walked up, followed by Peter and Sophie.   
"Have fun on your weekend, have a nice thanksgiving and know if you need anything to call." Sophie instructed as she hugged Daisy.   
Daisy smiled in spite of herself. "Will do." Daisy said.   
Peter stepped up and hugged her as well. "If we hear anything, you'll be one of the first to know."   
"Thanks." She said and then watched as the two adults stepped away to talk to her father and allow her and the other cliffhangers to say goodbye for the weekend. She looked down the line of them who all looked relatively unhappy. "It's only a weekend guys." She said trying to make a joke.   
"Yea." Auggie said. "But first time home can be… rough."   
Daisy nodded. "I used to live with the man, I think I can handle a weekend, especially if he isn't drinking."   
Ezra noticed her mention of the word if. "Well," He said interrupting, "I'll see you on Monday. Good luck." He said and gave her a quick hug.   
"You better be back on Monday Daisy, I don't want to be left as the only girl." Juliette said giving Daisy a hug as well.   
"See ya on Monday." David said giving her a quick hand squeeze before stepping back with the others.   
"Don't do anything to get yourself in trouble." Auggie said stepping up in front of her. "No offense or anything Dais, but it's really easy to get a hold of stuff on the outside and after everything that has happened lately… I wouldn't blame you, but just think about stuff before you do it."   
Daisy nodded. "Thanks Aug." She said and gave him a hug. "I'll see you Monday." Auggie nodded and stepped over with the others.   
Scott walked up to her then. "So you're really leaving?" He asked.   
"Yea, but just for the weekend." She said quickly.   
"What if Shelby comes back?"   
"They'll call me."   
"But she might need you here."   
"And you're the one to give advice on being here for her, I'm sure." She said sarcastically.   
"Hey you're the one leaving this time not me." Scott argued back.   
"I don't want to leave, but… life goes on Scott. Face it, it's been almost a month, Shelby may not come back."   
"She'll come back." Scott said determinedly. "She will."   
'Fine Scott, but I still have to go, I'll see you on Monday." She said tiredly and started to turn to head to the car.   
"I still can't believe your actually going." Scott said to her retreating form.   
"Like I said Scott," She said turning around to face him, "I don't really want to go with her gone."   
"But your still going." He said and then turned and walked past the others.   
"He didn't mean it Daisy." Ezra said stepping up next to her. "He doesn't blame you, he's just worried about Shelby."   
"He doesn't have to blame me, I blame myself."   
  
Shelby rolled over in bed her arm sliding across the man lying next to her. Shelby opened her eyes and waited as they adjusted to what she was seeing. "Bobby?" She asked.   
"Hey." He said sleepily opening his eyes and looking at her.   
"Why are you in my bed?" She asked.   
Bobby smiled amused. "We didn't do anything." He said. "You had a bad dream and insisted that I stay."   
"Oh." She said looking down at the ground. "I didn't realize."   
"Don't worry about it." He looked at her for a moment and then said, "It's not the first one you've had."   
Shelby looked at him. "Why didn't you say anything?"   
"Figured if you wanted me to know you would have told me." He said, as he sat up in the bed. "I should probably get ready for work. I'll stop by the bar on my way home."   
"Bobby?" Shelby asked watching the good - looking young man pull off his dirty t - shirt as he headed for the shower.   
"Yea." He asked turning around.   
"Did you really mean what you said yesterday?" She asked. The two hadn't talked about it since the day before. She had immediately told him she had to get back to work and then had insisted that she was too tired to talk about it afterwards and had went to bed. "Do you really think you love me?"   
Bobby lips suddenly formed a soft smile and he walked over and sat down on the edge of the bed. "Patty, you are a beautiful women. I have never stayed with a woman for more then a week, if I wasn't already sleeping with her. You, though, are different. You seem to deserve more then that. And you make me feel like I deserve better then what I've had before." He looked deep into her eyes. "I know that we don't tell each other everything," Shelby looked down knowing he was talking about the nightmare, "But I have never felt as close to anyone as I feel to you."   
Shelby nodded on the verge of tears. She leaned over and gave him a soft kiss on the lips. "Bobby, always remember that you do deserve more. Everyone deserves to have someone that loves them and that makes them happy, even if the only person that does that is themselves."   
Bobby looked at her and smiled. "I will always remember." He said and kissed her back. "I need to go take a shower now." He said and stood and headed away.   
Shelby took a deep calming breath, if he only knew who she really was, he wouldn't think that. Shelby suddenly realized that she needed to get out and to get out fast.   
  
"So most of the students are still here for thanksgiving, are we doing anything special?" Peter and Sophie turned from where they had been hunched over some paper work to see Kat and Hank standing in the doorway of the lodge.   
"Hey Kat." Peter said standing and walking over to give her a hug. She hadn't been back since the beginning of the year. "You look great, how have you been?"   
"Good." She said hugging him back and then hugging Sophie. "Especially now that the quarter is over."   
"You still going to help out here during break?" Peter asked.   
"That's what I came to talk about," Kat said looking at Peter, "That and to find out how Shelby is doing."   
Peter looked at Sophie for a long moment. "She's still missing Kat." Sophie said softly laying a hand on Kats arm.   
"Oh." Kat said a little surprised. "Any word on where she might be?"   
Peter shook his head. "We keep trying, but so far no leads. She just doesn't want to be found."   
"Well, if anyone can find her, Roger can." Kat said hoping she expressed more confidence then she felt. She couldn't help but remember what had happened with Jack, when she'd been his counselor. If Shelby was still exhibiting the kind of behavior she had been when she was here, then anything was possible.   
"You ok?" Peter asked, seeing the distant look on Kats face.   
"Just a bit of Déjà vu. After everything with Jack, I can't help but really worry about Shelby." She answered.   
"Shelby's different Kat. Her hallucinations were caused by traumatic events not by a mental problem like with Jack. Shelby has a good chance of getting past hers and being able to have a normal life." Sophie said.   
Kat nodded still worried. "So the usual plans for thanksgiving weekend are still on right?" She asked changing the topic.   
"Yep. And this year we have you on our side, that is if you want to play." Peter said with a small grin.   
"Oh, I want to play." Kat said a smile spreading across her face.   
"Play what?" Hank asked.   
Kat looked at Hank a wide smile on her face. "You'll just have to wait and see, but let's just say Horizon has a thanksgiving tradition that is a little bit different then most places."   
Peter and Sophie laughed at her description. "Are you going to go see the other cliffhangers?" Sophie asked.   
"Yea." Kat said. "It must be so hard on them now that Shelby is gone."   
"Daisy is gone for the weekend as well." Peter said.   
"How's Jules handling it? She's the only girl running around in that group right now." Kat asked.   
"She seems ok, but she's probably a bit depressed, which was why I thought if you were going to visit, you could try to cheer her up a bit." Sophie said.   
"Sure thing Sophie." Kat said. "Oh, well, I'll see you guys later." She and Hank then turned and headed for the door. "The festivities start Sunday morning right?" Kat asked.   
"Ten o'clock sharp." Peter said.   
"See you then." Kat said and Hank said goodbye as well as the two headed out.   
  
"Hey Juliette." Kat says walking into the girl's dorm and finding Juliette lying on her bed reading a magazine.   
"Kat!" Juliette squealed jumping up and going over and hugging the girl. "It's good to see you. How is college going?"   
"It's going great." Kat said. "I did really well my first quarter, but it is certainly different then being here." She said a bit wistfully. "You know maybe later in the year you could come visit me. Peter and Sophie have said your doing well and that you've been off campus a few times so maybe they'd let you."   
"Really?" Juliette squealed. "That would be great."   
Kat smiled. "It would be great." She said glad that Juliette might now have something to look forward to. "So how are things with you and Auggie?" Kat asked sitting down on one of the beds. Juliette sat down as well.   
"Great. He's so sweet to me. I can't imagine finding a better guy." She said.   
Kat smiled. "That's great. You two help each other so much."   
"Yea." Juliette said and smiled. "He's been good for me."   
"So how are Auggie and everyone else doing?" Kat asked.   
"Scott's moody because Shelby is gone." Juliette said once again sad. "And Daisy is upset as well. David and Ezra are still fighting over Daisy so anything that effects her, effects them and Auggie and I are doing well together, but things with Shelby have brought the whole group down."   
Kat nodded. "That happens sometimes Jules. That's part of why Horizon puts you in groups so that you realize that everyone can be effected by one person's decision."   
Juliette nodded. "I'm really beginning to see that."   
  
Act two (afternoon)   
The taxi pulled up in front of the fancy mansion and Daisy and her father climbed out of the car. They had taken a plane from Horizon so it hadn't taken long to get to their home. The trip had been relatively pleasant with little conversation because neither was really sure what to say to the other.   
"I made reservations for dinner at the Dante." Mr. Liponowsky said as he helped Daisy unload her luggage from the cab. Daisy just nodded. It felt weird to be home again. It was her first trip that her mom wasn't going to be here. Daisy wasn't sure it had ever really hit her that her mom was gone. It was easy to be at Horizon and still think of her mom at home, but now she was home and her mom wouldn't be here…ever.   
Daisy quickly headed for the house, afraid that if she didn't she wasn't going to go inside at all. Her father followed and unlocked the door allowing her to enter. Daisy looked around, everything seemed to be the same as it used to be. The white carpet of the living room still looked new and the baby grand piano that sat in the room was clean and dusted, but Daisy knew that the last person to use it had been her mother. Daisy tore her eyes away from the piano. "I should take my things upstairs." She said.   
"Yea. You can get settled before dinner." He said and again Daisy just nodded. She carried her bags upstairs and pushed open her door looking around her huge bedroom. Her queen size bed had black bedding and her windows were covered with blankets to block out the light making the room dark. Her floor was spotless and a quick glance around told her things hadn't been moved around. It seemed to be exactly the way she had left it. Daisy set her bags down on the floor and walked over pulling the blankets from all the windows in the room. Light flooded in. Something she used to hate, but having lived at Horizon in the mountains for a year had made her appreciate the light. She tossed the blankets into a pile in the corner of her room and headed into the hall to the linen closet to find some other color bedding to put on her bed. But walking down the hall she noticed something that made her stop. The hallway walls had pictures. They hadn't always had pictures, Daisy was sure she would have remembered them. But here they were, pictures of her and the family, especially pictures of her mom and dad were up on the walls. Daisy's breath suddenly caught in her throat and tears pooled in her eyes.   
"Daisy!" Her father calls up the stairs. "We need to head to dinner if we're going to make the reservation."   
"Be right there." Daisy said after swallowing hard a few times. She headed quickly down the stairs, hoping dinner would go ok and being grateful that she didn't have to spend more time in the house.   
  
Scott and Auggie stood by the wood shed. They had been chopping wood for an hour.   
"I can't beleive she just left." Scott said and then brought the ax down splitting a piece of wood. "Shelby's supposed to be her best friend and she just up and leaves."   
Auggie gathered the wood. "Yo meat she was just doing what she had to do. We all are man."   
"None of us want Shelby to be gone." Ezra said as he and David walked up and joined the group. "But she is and even when she's not here, well life goes on Scott." Ezra said.   
Scott turned to face them. "That's all I seem to be hearing from anybody. 'Shelby's gone Scott.' 'Life goes on Scott.' Everyone keeps acting like I should forget about her. Shelby's out there somewhere probably having a nervous breakdown and no one cares. What are you guys going to tell her when she comes back? It won't be that you didn't give up on her." With that Scott turned and began to walk away.   
"What if she doesn't come back Scott?"   
Scott turned and glared menacingly at David. "She'll come back." He said his voice a low hiss.   
"What if she doesn't?" David said stepping up to Scott. "It's been a month Scott. She's been gone a month. You said so yourself that she was freaking out before she left. What makes you think she's still alive? Why do you think they quit searching for her night and day Scott? They have no new leads. She's gone Scott, face it."   
Scott grabbed David by his shirt and the two were thrown to the ground. "You don't know what the hell your talking about. You don't know Shelby. She'll come back."   
"For you?" David asked.   
"Yea." Scott said pushing David away and sitting up on him so that David was still trapped below him. "She did before."   
David took a deep breath knowing his next line would cost him. "How do you know she's not going back to one of her 'other' guys?"   
Scott swung and it would have connected with David had Roger not grabbed the boys arm.   
"You take that back." Scott screamed at David lunging for him. "She's not like that. She wouldn't do that." But even as the words escaped his mouth, his brain whirled with what ifs. His new thoughts causing the intended violence to be forgotten for the moment.   
Roger realizing Scott had calmed down, released his grip. " All right you two, you need to talk this out." He said even though he was certain he knew exactly what was causing Scott's violent behavior. The same thing that always caused his violent behavior as of late: Shelby. Or really her dissappearance. "David, you ok?" Roger asked as Auggie helped him to his feet.   
"Yea." David answered. "Guess this means Scott and I get to visit Peter again?"   
"Yea." Roger said as the three headed off across campus. "I would think the two of you would get sick of visiting him so often."   
"What can I say?" David asked. "We like the guy."   
  
Act three (Early evening think 5 p.m.)   
Bobby walked around the bar scanning the room looking for Patty. "Hey Stan." He said to one of the men sitting at the counter. "You seen Patty, she was supposed to be working till five, but I can't seem to find her anywhere."   
"Couldn't tell ya Bob." Stan answered. "I was too busy trying to be old Chuck here at pool."   
Bobby nodded and started to head to the back of the bar to look for her again when he saw Mr. Granger. "Hey, Mr. Granger, have you seen Patty, I was supposed to pick her up, but I don't see her."   
Mr. Granger walked over and pulled an envelope from behind the counter. "Patty was in earlier, said she wasn't feeling well and since we had two other people here she left early, but she asked me to give you this when you came by." He said and handed him an envelope.   
'Thanks." Bobby said and took the envelope, wondering why Patty wouldn't have just told him whatever was in this letter when he got home. He opened it and took out the note, when he did a key fell out as well. Bobby immediately recognized it as his apartment key and his stomach turned as he realized what the letter must say. He closed his eyes and took a deep breath forcing himself to read the letter anyhow.   
Dear Bobby,   
I wish I could tell you this in person, but I know you wouldn't let me go if I did. I can't tell you where I'm going or why, but know that what happens will be ok. Remember what I said, you deserve more. I realized in telling you that, that I needed to take my own advice. I know that you thought you loved me, but you didn't and one day you'll realize it. Bobby, I am not who you thought I was. My name isn't even Patty, but what I told you about you deserving more was true. I hope you have a good life you deserve one.   
Shelby   
Bobby looked at the signature. Shelby. All of this time he had thought she was somebody else. She had lied to him. I can't believe I thought I loved her. "Mr. Granger, give me a scotch on the rocks." He said. He didn't want to think about this now.   
  
"So Scott and David are on kitchens?" Ezra asked Juliette and Auggie as the three ate dinner.   
"Yea." Juliette said. "Those two have been at it ever since Shelby left."   
"That's because David keeps pushing him."   
"If Meat would learn to control his temper this wouldn't be a problem."   
"If Shelby would come back, it wouldn't be a problem." Juliette said.   
Auggie turned to her. "You really think that?" Ezra asked before Auggie could.   
"Yea." Juliette said. "Scott loves her." She said emphasizing the 'L' word. "The two have been through so much together. Being apart from her is destroying him and the group."   
"So what happens when you go to college?" Kat asked walking into the convesation. She had decided to stop by for dinner to see how the other cliffhangers were fairing. The three looked up at her. "Horizon is a nice place, but you can't stay here forever. There's a real world out there Jules and you won't always be able to depend on everyone."   
Juliette looked down at her plate. It was true that they would one day leave this place. Some sooner then others. What was she going to do without them?   
"You have to learn to rely on yourself." Kat said almost as though she read Juliette's mind. "Scott and Shelby are in love." She said emphasizing the 'are'. "But they both need to change some before they leave here or else it won't last."   
"We all need to change some before we leave." Auggie said. "We're not ready for the real world yet."   
"We've been in the harsh world though." Ezra said. 'I guess it's just getting used to the adult world that we need to do and the world away from Horizon."   
"It's not as hard as you would think." Kat said. "While you can't stay here forever, you can always visit." She said with a smile. "And call and write. And if there love is as strong as it seems to be, they'll make it. They have a lot to work through once Shelby comes back, but if they are both willing to try they'll be able to." The others nodded. They didn't want to see Scott and Shelby break up, the two were unbearable when they were apart.   
  
Scott washed a dish and handed it to David. "I didn't really mean what I said earlier." David said quietly.   
Scott looks over to him wondering why the usually annoying and brash David was all of a sudden seemingly apologizing.   
"Look, I know I come off as a jerk."   
"Your right you do. But you don't just come off as one, you are one." Scott said to him. "You've been here for almost nine months and you still act the same."   
"Didn't we get along when we were on that buddy back thing?" David asked.   
Scott glares at him, but then smiles as he thinks about the fish incident. "Yea... Your not a complete jerk."   
"Thanks." David said sarcastically as he dries a dish and then puts it away. "Scott, I am sorry about Shelby and what I said earlier." A pause. "But the others are right... Life goes on Scott. You've been in this funk ever since she left. Shelby wouldn't want you to be like this." He pauses again. "There is such a thing as caring too much."   
Scott leans over the sink propping up on his elbows and rubbing his hands over his face. "I know."   
"I do." He stands back up suddenly. "I don't know what I'll do if she's gone." David suddenly realized that Scott's biggest fear wasn't Shelby's not returning, but her reason for not returning. "I should have noticed sooner. I'm supposed to be in love with her and Juliette and Daisy noticed something was wrong with her before I did."   
"Don't kick yourself about this man. It's just that you have so much to deal with. Add Shelby into the mix and it gets hectic, because she's dealing with her stuff too."   
"So I should deal with my stuff and just forget about Shelby?" He snapped.   
"No." David answered. "I think you should take time to deal with yourself, so that when Shelby and you get together, it will be better then ever."   
Scott gave a slight nod and then smiled. "When did you become such a caring person David?"   
"Oh I don't know." David said jumping back into his usual self. "I guess I just channelled Sophie or something."   
Scott laughed and went back to washing dishes. He paused after cleaning a couple dishes and then turned to David. "Other then the stuff with your dad, I don't know why your here, but if you ever want to talk... to someone other then Daisy... I'll listen."   
David dried the dish that he was holding. "You guys pretty much hear it all in group." He places the dish in the stack with the others. "But thanks for the offer. It's nice to know I could talk to someone other then a counselor."   
"Yea, well, your not so bad."   
"Now if you could only help me convince Daisy of that."   
"Sorry Davvvy, I have enough girl problems." Scott said with a laugh.   
  
  
  
"Daisy, I'm sorry to end our dinner early, I just have to go to the office real and take care of a problem." Mr. Liponowsky said.   
"It's not a problem." Daisy said as her father pulled up outside their house. "I'm sure I'll find something to keep myself occupied, besides I'm still tired from the trip." She said.   
He nodded, a look of guilt passing across his features. "I'm sorry about this Daisy. I'll be back as soon as I can."   
Daisy climbed out of the car. "It's fine dad." She said, but her tone showed that it wasn't. "I'll see you when you get home." She said and quickly closed the door and hurried into the house before he could say anything else.   
Upon entering Daisy went to the couch and sat down considering if she wanted to watch TV or do something else. After sitting on the couch for several minutes, she decided she needed to do something, anything, but just sit. What had she used to do when she was here? She had spent most of her time with her friends or away from home… or, she thought as her eyes landed on the piano, singing and playing. Stood and headed over to the piano sitting down and looking at the piano. Her mom had taught her how to play; probably part of the reason she never admitted she could. She had heard Scott play and was impressed with his ability. He played with a different style, but he was still very good. Daisy stretched her arms and cracked her knuckles. After a moment she placed her hands on the keys and slowly played a scale. It had been a long time since she had played.   
After playing for some time she remembered something that her mother used to play, Daisy stood, lifting the bench top to look for some sheet music, upon opening it though, she discovered something else. Daisy's draw dropped, and then her mouth formed a tight thin line as she shook her head knowing she should have known better. She picked the bottle up holding it in her hand and inspecting it closely. She shouldn't have believed him.   
It was at that moment the front door opened and her father stepped in.   
"You're drinking again?" Daisy shouted at him, more of an accusation then a question.   
" Daisy you don't understand…" Her father started to say.   
"Don't understand what? Don't understand that you can't get through a day without a drink? Don't understand that everything you keep saying is true, is lies? You promised me. You told me you had changed and that you did love me and you don't." She shouted at him, her voice breaking with emotion.   
"I have." He said trying to explain himself as he stepped into the room. "I do. I… I don't drink… I haven't had a drink in a long time. I'm telling the truth."   
"I don't believe you!" Daisy shouted at him. "You can't keep a promise and you can't not drink. Everything you said was a lie." Daisy said and with that she threw the bottle that was in her hand across the room towards her father.   
Mr. Liponowsky hit the floor very reflexively and glass shattered above and over him. "Daisy!" He shouted.   
"You are a liar!" She shouted at him.   
He picked himself up off the floor groaning at the abuse he'd just bestowed upon his body. "Look, you're too upset to talk about this rationally." He said to her. "I'll give you some time to calm down." He said.   
"Calm down! Calm down?" She shouted. "You're a liar. An alcoholic liar. And I never… never want to see you again."   
Mr. Liponowsky looked down at his daughter knowing any bridge of a relationship that they had had was for now gone. "Fine." He said his voice crisp. He then turned and headed out the door.   
  
Shelby walked down the aisle of the bus finding a window seat near the back. She was once again running away from everything. Bobby hadn't really been much to her, but she'd apparently meant something to him. She knew her leaving hurt him. Didn't doubt for a moment that he was sitting in the bar drinking.   
She sat down in the seat, pulling her bag onto her lap and staring out the window. Things had certainly changed. A few months back there had been the morp and Scott telling her he loved her. Then there had been the summer, which had been good for the entire cliffhanger group. Well everyone, but Kat who had had the psychopath in her group. Now it seemed that Shelby was the resident psycho of Horizon. She shook her head at the thought. No one could have known any of this was going to happen. Who would have thought that on her eighteenth birthday she'd tell her mom everything about her life on the streets before Horizon? Who would have thought that her mom would accept it and then her sister would reveal that her mom had considered letting Walt come home?   
Tears formed in Shelby's eyes as she thought of Jess. She wondered if Jess was worried about her. Shelby had run so many times. Had disappeared for months without contact, Jess was probably used to it by now. Her mom on the other hand probably didn't care that Shelby was gone, she was probably glad. She never really believed anything Shelby had said; it had taken Jess to make her mom realize her mistake.   
A tear spilled over Shelby's cheek. Did her mom even realize the mistakes she had made? Did her mom know about her father? That he like Walt had abused her and that he was now gone, ripping himself from the world by causing his own death because he was too weak to deal with the guilt and the repercussions of it all.   
More tears fell as Shelby thought of the man and of the last few weeks. Why was her life so hard? Why had one person managed to take so much from her? How had she let it happen? It wasn't fair and it hurt so much.   
Shelby stood and hurried towards the door of the bus that had yet to begin traveling. How was she supposed to leave when she had no place to go, no one to go to? She stopped before getting to the front. How could she stay, when she had nothing to stay for? Shelby stopped and sat down in the first available seat. She had nothing…no one.   
  
Daisy stared at the door, tears still falling down her face. He had left… he had actually left. Why could he just not drink? Why did he have to lie and be an alcoholic? Daisy looked at the glass from the bottle that was spread across the floor. Why did she have to get so mad? Why was she so afraid that she was going to become him?   
"Maybe because I already am like him." She said to herself. Looking around, Daisy moved quickly through the house tearing it apart looking for any more alcohol that may still be hidden. After several minutes of searching she came upon a bottle of scotch. "If I'm going to be like him, why delay the inevitable." She said to herself and with that she opened the bottle and took a long sip.   
  
Mr. Liponowsky drives down the road a bottle lying unopened in the seat next to him. His hands shook, he was so angry. He hit the gas speeding up a little wanting to get away from his problems and his enraged daughter for just a little while.   
  
Shelby sat on the bus silently. She had managed to move to a window seat, where few people could see her. She couldn't ever remember feeling as lonely as she did now. At least not in a long time. Tears slid down her face as she thought of everything she'd been through in the last few months and of everything she had lost.   
  
Daisy stumbled through the living room, the open bottle in her hand. She took a long drink making a face as the liquid burned on the way down. She couldn't imagine how her father drank this stuff, but then again considering the oblivion from her problems that she was experiencing right now, it didn't really matter to her why her father drank it.   
  
The black car belonging to Daisy's dad speeds down the road. The driver, Mr. Liponowsky makes a sidelong glance to the bottle in the seat next to him. Is it worth it? A flash of his daughter and the pain and anger he had seen on her face when he'd arrived home went through his mind… was it worth it?   
  
Shelby continues to cry as the bus passes a sign saying, "Thanks for visiting Colorado."   
  
Thoughts of his daughter once again flash through Mr. Liponowsky's brain as he contemplates getting the bottle from the seat that his eyes are gazing at. Is it worth it? The answer to the contemplated question never is answered. A horn blowing and metal scraping against metal is heard. Then glass shatters and Mr. Liponowsky, having been thrown from his car, lands in the middle of the darkened highway. 


	33. Going Home

"Bottom line is, even if you see 'em coming, you're not ready for the big moments. No one asks for their life to change, not really. But it does. So what are we, helpless? Puppets? No. The big moments are gonna come. You can't help that. It's what you do afterwards that counts. That's when you find out who you are. You'll see what I mean."   
Buffy the Vampire Slayer   
  
Going Home teaser   
(Day after the last fic ended: Saturday. Sophie walks through two double doors into the waiting room, spotting Daisy who is sitting in a chair dressed in black jeans and a dark colored shirt.)   
"Daisy." Sophie says hurrying over to the young girl. Daisy looks up at Sophie. It's obvious Daisy's been crying. "Are you ok? How is he?"   
Daisy doesn't move from where she sits, but says tonelessly. "He's been in surgery. He should be out any time now."   
Sophie sits down next to her. "So how are you?" She asks genuinely concerned.   
"Right now I'm sort of still drunk." Daisy says still tonelessly.   
Sophie's face changes to a dissapointed almost hurt look and Daisy turns away from her.   
  
(Back at Horizon Peter is in his office he grabs his jacket and keys and heads out of the office. He arrives at the parking lot and gets on his motorcycle. He starts the engine and takes off for home. It shows him riding the bike to his house and pulling into his driveway. He parks the bike and pulls his helmet off. Looking to the steps for the first time, his jaw goes slack in suprise.)   
"Shelby?"   
(Roll credits)   
  
Going Home part 1   
(Peter's House)   
Shelby looks up seeing Peter, suddenly thinking she's doing the wrong thing, she looks away. Peter walks over noticing that she has lost weight and that she smells of cigerette smoke, but that she looks ok. Unsure of what to say to his wayward student, he sits down on the steps next to her, waiting on her to say something.   
"Can I stay?" She asks quietly not looking at him.   
Peter knows what she wants to hear, but also knows that when she left she had a lot of problems and her actions had caused a lot more problems.   
Shelby finally looks him in the eye. "I have no where else to go." She said her voice breaking ever so slightly. She looks away refusing to cry.   
Peter's heart broke. "We'll work something out." he says getting a little choked up himself.   
  
(Hospital, Sophie and Daisy are still waiting on word from the doctor. Since Daisys admission of drinking, they haven't said anything to each other.)   
Sophie finally breaks the silence. "Daisy I know this is hard."   
"No you don't." Daisy says, she doesn't want to talk about it and she turns away from Sophie again.   
Sophie sighs not sure what to do. After several moments of silence, Daisy speaks again.   
"He wasn't drunk." She says quietly.   
Sophie looks at Daisy. "What?" She asks not sure she heard her right.   
"He wasn't drunk." She says with more emphasis. "I found a bottle of Scotch in the living room and accused him of lying and drinking again, but he hadn't been drinking... he wasn't drunk when he wrecked. It's rather ironic actually. The cops came and told me what happened and it turns out he was hit by a drunk driver."   
"Daisy I'm so sorry."   
"Don't be...it's not your fault."   
"Daisy this isn't your fault either." Sophie puts a hand on her knee. "You know that right? I don't know exactly what happened last night, but I know it wasn't your fault."   
"I accused him of drinking." Daisy said turning to Sophie. "I just assumed that he was drinking again, because of one bottle. He wasn't lying this time Sophie, he wasn't. And the worst part is... is the meeting that he claimed he had to go to was an AA meeting. He didn't want me to know for some reason, he thought I'd be upset that he still needed to go on a daily basis."   
Sophie looks at Daisy not sure what to say. It's obvious that Daisy is hurting, but Sophie has never seen her this distraught. It was very unDaisy like.   
"Daisy why don't you tell me exactly what happened last night?" Sophie said, hoping that if Daisy spoke about it, it would help and wanting to know why Daisy had been drinking.   
"I really don't want to talk about it Sophie." Daisy said in an almost child like way.   
"Daisy I..."   
"I don't want to talk about it." Daisy said cutting Sophie off.   
They both suddenly look up as a doctor enters the room. "He's out of recovery and we've moved him to ICU." the doctor paused for a moment and then continues. "He's still unconscious."   
"What exactly happened doctor?" Sophie asks at the same time that Daisy asks,"Can I see him?"   
"He can have visitors." The doctor said. "But," He said and turned to Sophie to answer her question, "He is pretty bruised up. He broke his ribs and he has a concussion. He probably did that hitting the steering wheel or the road. Since he hasn't come around since the accident were keeping in monitored, but there is no sign of brain damage." The Doctor reassured. "He also has multiple cuts, but considering from what I heard from the EMT's on the scene, the man is lucky to be alive and even luckier that that's the extent of his injuries." Just as the doctor finished a nurse called to him and the doctor excuses himself and leaves.   
"I want to see him." Daisy says turning to Sophie.   
"Do you want me to go with you?"   
"No." Daisy said quickly. "I think I'll be better off going on my own."   
Sophie nodded. "I'm here if you need me." She says giving Daisy's arm a sqeeze and Daisy nods before heading down the hall to her father's room.   
  
  
(Peter's house. Peter and Shelby are still sitting on the front steps.)   
"So, I get to stay, but I know it can't be that simple." Shelby says, after she and Peter have both managed to reign in their emotions. Ever since Shelby had left Bobby, her thoughts had been on how she had no where to go... no where to go but here. But she knew that after everything that was not exactly going to be a welcome home party. Things had been bad when she left; Shelby just hoped they could somehow work past it.   
"No, it's not." Peter said, "But it's good that you realize that. When you left, a lot had happened."   
Shelby nodded. "You mean with my father committing suicide and the hallucinations and everything."   
"Yea." Peter said, glad that she seemed able to talk about it.   
"Well, the hallucinations have pretty much gone away. It helped to be off campus..." Her voice trailed off as she realized that he didn't really know the reason she had been having the flashbacks. Shelby took a deep breath, "Peter, I know we talked about my father being abusive. About how he was the first to really hurt me because he left and because he didn't help me when I went to him for help, but..." Shelby wasn't sure she could say it. "Walt picked up where he left off." She said hoping he'd take the hint.   
Peter looked at her suprised and then felt guilty for having told her father he could come to campus. "I'm sorry Shel." He said.   
"No." Shelby said shaking her head. "It's ok." Peter gave her a look. "It's not ok what he did, but it's ok that you let him come to campus." She said knowing what he had been thinking. "You didn't know...I didn't know either." A pause. "When I ran away after my mom visited that attack really threw me off. I didn't even realize it had, until weeks afterwards. But the nightmares started and then when he showed up that's when I started thinking I saw them everywhere. I saw Walt and people from the streets and then there was always this person I couldn't identify...a shadowman. And then one day I had a nightmare and I remembered. It just came back to me. And that's when I decided to confront him. You said confronting it would make it go away... so I did. And he admitted it."   
"That's when you made him leave. That was that day in the office." Peter said in realization.   
"Yea." Shelby said. "And that's why he killed himself. He couldn't face what he did. He knew he was a horrible man and so he killed himself." Shelby paused for a long moment as both pondered this. "Peter, I want to come back to Horizon. I don't have anything out there in the world. I ran and I found a real job waitressing and I found a place to live, but the world, the real world, is a hard place. I'm not ready to deal with it yet. I have to figure out who I am and how to get over what's happened to me first. And Horizon is no longer a safe place to me. When I left I was running from Horizon because those flashbacks and my father being there made me feel as though it was all happening again and this time it was in the one place I had always felt safe." Shelby looked Peter in the eyes. "I have spent the last month thinking about my life and trying to go on like I'm fine, but I can't do it. This stuff has happened to me. And I have done things that I think make me a not so good person and I'm screwed up. And I don't want to be. I want to be happy. I want to be able to be with Scott and not worry about my past. And I don't want to run any more. I want to deal with this stuff. I'm ready to deal with this stuff. And the only way to do that is by staying at Horizon and getting help."   
Peter nodded taking in all that she has said. "Shelby, I'm willing to let you come back to Horizon, especially if you're ready to get help, but things are going to have to be different. You're going to have to have more extensive therapy and counseling. And the cliffhangers aren't going to just welcome you back with open arms. They're upset and they're scared. They've been worried sick about you. And they are mad because you pushed them away and your going to need to make amends with them."   
"I know." Shelby said meeting his gaze. "And I'm ready to do that."   
  
Going Home Part 2   
  
(Daisy is sitting beside her father's bedside, he is hooked to several different machines, including a heart monitor.)   
Daisy takes a deep breath and lets it out shakily, she smiles even though tears are falling down her face. "This is probably the only time I'll ever be able to talk to you and actually have you listen." She shakes her head. "I hate this." She says sqeezing his hand, more tears coming. She looks at the ceiling, "I hate this." She says again.   
"It wasn't supposed to be like this." She said accusingly to her father. "I'm supposed to be allowed to hate you for what you did. For all the times you let me down and the fact that because of your and mom's drinking she's no longer here." She pauses. "But I don't hate you daddy. I hate that you drink. And I hate the things you do when you drink, but I don't hate you. I wish I did it would be so much easier."   
She takes another deep shaky breath. "It took mom dying before I was able to realize that. Once she was gone I realized that while she was a bad mother, and I hated all the things she did that I didn't hate her... I still haven't really forgiven her... I accepted what she did, because I couldn't forgive her and I didn't hate her anymore, she wasn't here to hate any more."   
"But your here...and I hate the things you do when you drink daddy. I hate it more then anything... And you know what I hate most... is that I wasn't a good enough reason for you to be sober. Why wasn't I a good enough reason to get you to stop? Why did mom have to die before you decided you should get help? Why did so much have to go wrong?" She says once again looking above for an answer.   
She took a deep breath. "You took off last night and I did something I vowed I would never do... I drank." She looks down at her hands. "Life father, like daughter...I guess I wanted to know what was so appealing that you found it better then your own daughter." Her voice broke over her own bitterness. "Daddy I know I keep rambling over the same questions, but can't I just know why? Why I'm not good enough? Why you don't love me?" Her emotions broke completely as the question broke off in a sob.   
  
(Shelby and Peter are now inside his house. She is sitting at the kitchen table and Peter is making her a hot cup of decaffinated hot tea.)   
"So where do we go from here?" Shelby asked Peter.   
Peter glanced at her as he set the mug in front of her and then sat down across from her before answering. "Well," He said, "Your going to have to go through a physical and a physchological exam. I have to be sure the visions have stopped before you return to Horizon." He said gently not sure how she'd react to the news.   
"What will I have to do?" Shelby asked, realizing that it was probably nothing compared to some of the things she'd done. She shuddered at the thought.   
"Are you cold?" Peter asked concerned.   
"No." Shelby answered quickly. "Not really." She said looking at him. "I was just thinking it couldn't be worse then some of the stuff I've done."   
Peter gave a slight nod, not sure what to say or how to respond, but acknowledging that he heard her.   
"Peter..." Her voice trailed off. The man sitting before her knew more then any other man in her life ever had. She had spoken to him about things that she had never thought she would speak to anyone about. "This is awkward." She said.   
"How so?" Peter asked, wondering what she was thinking.   
She sighed and sat back in the chair, suddenly wishing for a cigerette. "Because I don't feel like the other students at Horizon. I don't feel like I'm the same girl that left Horizon." She smiled ironically. "I never felt that I got to be a kid, but all of a sudden I feel that I'm not one anymore. When I was younger and ran away all I did was sell myself on the street and that's not a job. It's no way to make a living. This time... this time was different. I was making it Peter." She said sitting forward. "I was living in an apartment and working a job that wasn't great, but I've had worse. And I was making my own way and I didn't feel that my job was... I don't know, but I was making it.. without selling myself. But it was also scary and not scary in the I'm on the streets again, but because I'm going to have to go back out there in a few months and I don't know if I can handle it. I do the best I can, but I know what lengths I'll go to." She looked up at Peter. "I don't know how to explain it. I've grown up some, I've tasted the real working world and it's scary, because I have all this stuff... all this stuff from before that keeps coming back and until I get past it I can't do anything."   
"What do you mean?" Peter asked, pretty sure he knew what she meant, but fishing for information.   
Shelby took a deep breath, not sure she should tell him. "I have the perfect example, but I don't want to tell you." She said. She played with the tea bag in the cup. "Let's just say I realize why you ban relationships at Horizon, it can be a lot to deal with."   
Peter suddenly wondered if Shelby was going to break it off with Scott. Scott was torn up enough about Shelby's leaving, he would have even more problems if they broke up. Not that they were exactly together at the moment. Things hadn't been good between the two when Shelby left, but only because she had been going through so much. Peter shook his head... since when had his students love lives made a difference to him? Since you realized how good they could be for them, he said to himself. And it was true. While Peter still felt that one needed to work on their own self worth; Shelby and Scott being together, and Auggie and Juliette, both couples had been able to help the others out in ways the counselors couldn't. But they also relied on each other to a point that could sometimes be bad, because they were volnerable to each other.   
"Not all relationships are bad." Peter found himself saying, but wishing he himself would shut up. It was not like him to interfere or give dating advice.   
Shelby looked at Peter oddly for a moment. "I know." She said with a small sigh. "But I have a lot to work out on my own right now." She paused not sure she should say it to him, but decided to take her chances, "I think Scott and I have somethings to work out seperatly that we can help each other with. I honestly think we're better together then apart. But I can't keep pushing him away and he can't keep trying to interfere when he doesn't really want to know."   
"Talk to him about it then." Peter said. "Even if the two of you are only friends," Peter said stressing the word trying to make it clear that he wished thats all they were. "And not a couple, you still need to communicate and you need to trust each other. That can't be easy for either of you to do. And if you want to make amends with the other cliffhangers as well your going to have to communicate with them, which involves listening as well as speaking. People are going to have to know what happened Shelby."   
"I know." She said with a sigh. She realized that in particular the one person that needed to know was Peter himself. She looked up at him. "I don't want to tell you yet." She looked back at the table. "I know coming back here will help me and I know that getting help is going involve telling about what happened, but... I'm just not ready right now to go into it. I don't know if I'll ever be ready." She stared at the table thoughts of everything going through her head. "I'm just not ready right now." She reiterated.   
Peter watched her for a moment and realized just how tired and worn she looked. He also realized that this was really only the beginning of Shelby's long battle. "Well, we are always here if you need us Shelby, and I mean that. You don't have to leave, we can help you, but you have to let us." Shelby gave a slight nod, not looking at Peter. "Well, let's go see Dr. Burke for your physical."   
  
Daisy didn't know how long she had sat next to her father crying, but it felt like too long. She wasn't one to cry or get emotional and here she was sobbing like a child next to her father. She sniffled and ran her arm across her face trying to erase the tears. "Never thought we'd be here like this." She said. "Must be the alcohol that makes me emotional." She said with a small laugh. She shook her head. He wasn't going to wake up. He hadn't heard anything she said. She was never really going to have a father, because he would never realize what his drinking and abuse did to her and she would never tell him not to his face.   
"Guess I should go tell Sophie that your ok." She said starting to stand. She was almost completely upright when she felt the tug at her hand.   
She turned sharply in suprise and looked down into the eyes of her father.   
"I do love you Daisy." Came the scratchy response.   
Daisy stared at her father in shock, not at all sure what to say or do.   
"I do." He said a little more urgently. "I know you don't beleive it." He coughed roughly. "But I do."   
Daisy leaned over and gave her father a drink from the glass next to the bed. After he had had a drink he continued.   
"I mean it." He continued. "You didn't do this." He said his eyes filled with anguish and guilt. "My drinking... your mothers drinking... you didn't drive us to it." He looked up at the ceiling. "Hell, we we're drinking long before you came along." His voice was full of pain. "When your grandfather...your mom's dad passed... well, your mother and he had been close... really close and it hurt her so much when he left. She just drank and drank... 'drowning her sorrows' as they say. When she found out she was pregnant... your mother was happy... thrilled." He smiled in memory. "Those months... those were some of the best of my life. She didn't drink, not once. She didn't want to harm the baby... she loved it so much.... I loved it so much."   
He shook his head. "But it wasn't meant to be..." He looked at Daisy wondering if she understood. Wondering if she'd be mad. "You had a brother Daisy. He was about five years older then you. He only lived to be a few months old." Daisy sat down more shocked then she had been and completely speechless. "SIDS. Sudden Infancy Death Syndrome. There was no reason for it... just one night we went to check on Alan... Alan Nathaniel Liponowski. He was beautiful... and one night... well one night I found him... he wasn't breathing. We rushed him to the hospital, but there was nothing that could be done. Your mother went back to drinking. I tries to not drink... to be strong for her... but it was hard... she was angry... depressed... she would cry all the time. I don't know how... but she ended up pregnant again. And she quick drinking... she didn't want to take any chances... she didn't want to harm you... she loved you so much... I loved you so much." His eyes turned to the still shocked Daisy. "After you were born she spent every night in your room. She was so afraid that... she was terrified. We both were. So we started having a drink... 'just to calm the nerves'. But after awhile one wasn't enough to be calming. We began to drink more. And her frazzled nerves... well she refused to leave you. She wanted you to be fine and so she wouldn't go to work or anywhere. She would just stay in the room and watch you... Check your breathing. We were arguing all the time. I wanted her to get over it. But she wanted to say. I don't remember when, but one time... well... as you got older... as she drank more... I began to drink too. It was something we could share. Something I could do with her. All she did was drink and watch you and after a while she... well she decided it was too painful to be around you... and so all she did was drink. All I did was drink."   
Daisy looked at her father, not sure what to say. "Your saying I had a brother?"   
Her father nodded. "Yea."   
  
"You mean she's back?" Sophie asked in shock.   
"Showed up at our door step this morning." Peter said. He was sitting in his office at his desk, still a little in shock from the latest turn of events. "She past the physical, but she is a bit underweight. And now she's at the hospital undergoing an evaluation. She's going to be there for a few days until they make sure the hallucinations are gone."   
"So she still may not be able to come back to Horizon?" Sophie asked as she sat down in one of the waiting room chairs.   
"I'm pretty confident she'll be able to." Peter said. "She seems to be past the worst of what's happened, but I'm not sure she's dealt with all of it. She seems to be afraid to come back to campus. Feels like it's not as safe as it used to be."   
Sophie sighed sadly. "Going to be hard to help her then."   
"I would think so too." Peter said. "If she hadn't come back on her own and said that she was ready to make a real effort to change her life."   
"She said that?"   
"Not in so many words. But she's ready to pull out the stops and try to put her life back together. I think she might feel like she hit rock bottom and in a way I guess she has."   
"Guess there is more to this story then your telling me."   
Peter said nothing for a moment and then answered. "Shelby says she's not ready to talk about it yet, but I think once the holiday is over and she gets some rest things will be better."   
"Better for her now that's she's back maybe, but the other students are going to be thrown in to the mix and that's going to be hard on Shelby. I don't think they are all going to have a nice reaction to her return."   
"They'll be glad that's she's back." Peter said. "But once they get over the pleasantries they are going to want to know what happened and why she didn't trust them enough to stay around."   
"Right." Sophie replied a little distractedly as she watched through the door's window the scene that was playing out before her eyes in the room across the hall. Daisy was sitting next to the bed holding her father's hand. She hadn't left his side since she entered the room and Sophie was certain that the conversations that were taking place were relationship changing for Daisy and her father.   
"Sophie?" Peter asked, sensing her distraction.   
Sophie shook her head and focused on Peter. "Things have changed Peter. It might have only been a month, but Daisy isn't going to be returning to Horizon the same. Shelby missed a lot. Scott has changed too. In his own way. He's been trying to deal with Shelby being gone and this isn't the first time that this has happened. It's not the first time she's left. He's not going to react well to that."   
Peter sat back in his chair with a sigh. "I know." He took a deep breath. "It's going to take some time for the cliffhangers to work all of this out. We're really going to have to be there for them."   
"Part of the job though." Sophie said, realizing more time with the cliffhangers meant less time alone with each other. She sighed, "Peter, do you ever wish you didn't do this?"   
Peter sat up in his chair. "The job getting to you Soph?" He asked concerned.   
"No." She said with a slight shake of her head. "Not really. Just... they've become my kids. But they have parents and families.... even if they aren't great. And we pick up the pieces."   
Peter rocked his chair in a twisting motion with his feet. "We help them Sophie. There is a lot to be said about that."   
"Yea... but we'll never have our own." She said sadly.   
Peter took a moment to think. He knew Sophie was distraught over the fact that she couldn't have children. She had almost refused his engagement because of that fact. "Sophie we do have our own." He said after a moment. "All the kids at Horizon, all the kids we help, they are ours Soph." He paused for a moment wondering if he was cheering her up. "It doesn't matter that you can't have kids Soph." He said quietly. "I told you that last year and I meant it. We get to help kids all the time and in the future... if you wanted... we could always adopt."   
"I know." Sophie said. "But it's not the same."   
"I know." Peter said sadly.   
The conversation paused for a moment as both thought about the fact that they would never have children of their own.   
"Well," Peter said after a moment, "I know you said Daisy has been in with her dad for a while and the doctors say he's out of the woods, so when are you coming home?"   
Sophie glanced through the door window again. "I guess it depends on Daisy. Her and her father are working some things out. I don't want to interrupt and cause things to fall apart. They have a good thing going."   
"Maybe you should let her know about Shelby." Peter suggested. "I'm not trying to force her away from her father, but if she's behaving the way your saying then she probably needs a break. And then she can think about what she's going to do now."   
"All right." Sophie said. She took a deep breath. "I guess I should let you go."   
"Yea." Peter said, even though he didn't want to hang up. Over the last few months they had really learned to lean on one another, after having moved in together over the summer, they had just gotten closer. "I have some paper work to do."   
Sophie nodded even though he couldn't see her. "I love you."   
"I love you too."   
"Bye."   
"Bye."   
  
"Peter?"   
"Yea Soph?"   
"I'm glad your there when I come home."   
Peter smiled warmly. "I'm glad your there too."   
"See you when I get home."   
"See ya." Peter said before hanging up the phone. He smiled widely. It had been some time since he had heard Sophie reffer to any place as home and now she was referring to Horizon as home. To him as home. He took a deep breath revelling in the fact that she was going to be his wife.   
  
Sophie sat back in the chair trying to collect her thoughts. Her conversation with Peter had seemed unexpected. The two had been talking more and more lately, but they seemed to be discussing the students more and more. After all the things that had happened so far though, it wasn't suprising that their conversations were wrapped up in the students.   
Sophie smiled slightly, even though the two had been caught up in the students lives more lately, she was still really beginning to feel like this was home to her. That Peter was her home. He had always been her rock, but now she felt that wherever he was could be home. Sophie smiled wider being grateful to the one thing that had always been stable in her life: Peter. What had she ever done without him?   
She took a deep breath and stared across the room towards Daisy and her father. Things were definetly changing, but her and Peter wouldn't. She took a deep breath standing up. She needed to talk to Daisy.   
  
Going Home Part 3   
"I wish Shelby were here." Juliette said as she and the other cliffhangers worked on cleaning up the kitchen.   
"Why? So you wouldn't have to wash as many dishes?" David asked giving her a look as he walked up and set more dishes down next to her.   
"No." Juliette said at him making a face. "But it would be nice if the group was back together. It's thanksgiving after all. It would be nice to have a good one for a change."   
"Yea." Ezra said as he came up behind them. He quit sweeping the floor and leaned against the broom. "I finally thought I'd be able to have a thanksgiving where people weren't yelling."   
"I just want a real thanksgiving dinner." Juliette said. "We never celebrated at home. We were always at some resturant." She paused looking up at the others. "Except for one year. It was when I was twelve. My mom was on vaca with husband number two and I was staying with my dad. Dinner was perfectly set up, we sat down to eat and everything." Her face fell a little then. "But mother called to make sure I was having a good time and she asked if I was watching my weight. I threw everything up a few minutes later." She reached down and pointed to a spot on her leg. "I have a scar too."   
The others just looked at her for a moment. Juliette was normally not that open about her cutting.   
"I remember this one time." David said taking the attention away from Juliette. "It was before my parents divorced." He stoped carrying dishes and leaned against the counter draping his arm over the pot. "My dad was away for the weekend for training and mom and I sat down and had a homecooked traditional thanksgiving. It was one of the best we had."   
"Little odd that your best thanksgiving was without your dad don't ya think?" Ezra asked.   
David looked up at Ezra. "Well then Ez - raa." He said in that annoying way he always does. "Why don't you tell us about your thanksgivings?"   
"I told you, all the ones I remember they were yelling." Ezra scoffed. "Probably the ones I don't remember they were yelling." He then turned and moved on to what he was doing.   
"So about you Meat." Auggie asked walking across the kitchen.   
Scott turned around and looked at Auggie. "Best thanksgiving I ever had was before my parents divorced. I was ten. We all sat down to dinner, my grandparents on both sides, all my relatives were there and after we had dinner, we went outside and played a game of football before the big game on tv. It was good." He paused. "How bout you?"   
"We always sit down for dinner. I'd say best times were before my brother was arrested."   
Scott nodded and then turned to Auggie. "Do you think Shelby had good times?"   
Auggie looked at Scott. "Maybe."   
"When they find her, you can ask her." Juliette said from where she stood at the sink washing a pan.   
"Juliette, always the optimist." Ezra said.   
"They still may not find her." Auggie said gently to Juliette.   
"I know." Juliette said stopping what she was doing but not looking at the others. "But were here at Horizon to hope for better things. Maybe since it's thanksgiving we can hope that she'll be back."   
The others all gave a slight nod to what Juliette said and went back to work in silent contemplation.   
  
"What was that about?" Mr. Liponowsky asked as Daisy entered the room.   
"Nothing you need to worry about." Daisy said as she took a seat next to him.   
He looked at her for a long moment. "Daisy if you need to go back to Horizon..." His voice trailed off as she looked at him. "I want you here, I do. But there isn't much you can do."   
"The doctor said you'd need some time... that you would need help." She said quietly.   
"I can get help." He said. "You shouldn't worry about me. You should be enjoying your thanksgiving, instead of sitting in the hospital with me."   
"Your my father." Daisy said.   
"Since when as that ever meant anything between us?" He asked seriously.   
Daisy looked down at her hands. It was true. It had never mattered before. "It matters since now. You might not be a great father. You might not even be a good father, but you are one. And your trying. That didn't mean much to me before now, but it does." She pauses and swallows hard. "Your all I have left daddy. If I lose you, I have no blood family. So we need to work this out. It needs to matter now." She pauses and says with a sad tearful smile, "You're sort of my last hope."   
Her father swallows hard. "Guess that means I need to do better."   
"Yea." Daisy says. "I guess it means we both do."   
He squeezes her hand and then says. "Go back to Horizon. We still have time, I'm not leaving this world anytime soon."   
"I want to stay."   
He shook his head. "You're better off there right now. I need to get better and I'm not just talking about from this accident. I need to do better about the drinking. But I promise we'll see each other more often."   
"Like Christmas?"   
"Yea. That can be arranged."   
Daisy smiled. Taking a deep breath she said something she never thought she'd say. "I love you dad."   
"I love you too." He said back.   
Daisy squeezed his hand and stood. "I'll see you at Christmas."   
"At christmas." He repeated and watched as she left.   
  
"You doing ok?" Sophie asked as Daisy walked out of her father's room.   
"I guess." Daisy said. She stopped walking and turned to face Sophie. "I'm sorry for drinking. I'm not sure exactly why I did it and I can't guarentee that I will never do it again, but I know first hand exactly what life is like when someone drinks." She paused for a moment. "I know I'm going to have to deal with this sometime, but can we wait until after the holiday. Right now I want to go pick up my things and go back to Horizon."   
Sophie looked down at Daisy. The girl had been through so much in the last few weeks. Sophie gave a slight nod. "I'll call Peter and let him know we'll be heading back tonight."   
"Do you need to say goodbye to your dad?" Sophie asked.   
"We already said goodbye." Daisy turned and began to walk towards the exit and Sophie fell into step next to her. "We also talked about another visit around Christmas time."   
"That might be nice." Sophie said.   
"That's what we thought. We're both ready to make an effort now."   
Sophie smiled at Daisy and put her arm around the girls shoulder. "You've made a lot of progress Dais. I'm proud of you."   
"Thanks." Daisy said smiling back up at Sophie.   
  
"Shelby you just need to relax." Dr. Thomas said to Shelby who was sitting on a couch in his office.   
"I'm just not good with new people." She said anxiously.   
"I know, you've said that many times in the last few hours."   
"I'm just tired."   
"You've had a rough time lately." Dr. Thomas said chewing on the end of his glasses.   
"You've said that many times in the last few hours as well." Shelby said mockingly. She paused for a moment. "I just want to know if I get to go back to Horizon. It's thanksgiving weekend. I haven't had any flashbacks in the last few weeks, not since the first week I left Horizon." She groaned and leaned back in her chair. "I just want to go back and move on."   
"Shelby," The doctor said leaning forward and resting his elbows on his knees. "The only way to move on now, is to go back." He paused for a moment. "Peter, and I have worked together for years. And we've talked. He says that you realize you are going to have to work on getting better and that you think the best place to do that is at Horizon."   
Shelby sat up and looked at the doctor. "If this is your way of gently trying to talk me into not going back, it won't work."   
"I have no intention of that." He said levely. "I do; however, feel that you will require more then just the assistance of Horizon to get past what has happened."   
"You want me to take meds?" She asked angrily. "I am not crazy. The flashbacks and all of that stopped weeks ago. I haven't had one since I left Horizon. I am not crazy!" She snapped at him now on her feet and pacing.   
Dr. Thomas sat back in his chair nonchalantly. "Do you think your crazy?"   
"No!" She snapped again. She looked at him for a moment and then sat down heavily. "Maybe." She said softly. "It's not normal to freak out on your friends. It's not normal to see things that aren't there." She shook her head slightly. ''I really felt like they were there."   
"I know you did Shelby." He said gently. He sat forward and looked at Shelby levelly. "You are not crazy." He said firmly. "What happened to you was something that was triggered by a recent event. It could have been the attack on the street, your father's visit or something else that we are unaware of. But their is a name for what is wrong with you and it's not crazy. It's Critical Incident Stress. It's when something happens that could jeopardize your safety and you react to it. When this happens someone has very strong emotional reactions to it. It can cause your moods to change, it causes social withdrawal and it can disrupt you physically as well. It can make you tired or cause you to lose your appetite. It basically just wrecks havok with your life."   
Shelby looked at him for a moment. "So then what do I do now?"   
"That's what we get to figure out. In most cases this type of thing happens to counselors, medical workers, police men. Mostly people that are in stressful situations everyday, but it does happen when someones life is in jeopardy as well. Such as the attack."   
Shelby nodded, glad to know she wasn't crazy. "That doesn't tell me what I do now."   
"Well, usually this sort of thing is dealt with right away. In your case it's been a month, so your treatments will have to be a bit different."   
"I won't take medication."   
"Shelby, if I felt that was best for you, you would not have a choice in the matter." He said seriously, "But I do not feel that is the best solution. I like my patients to feel that they have some control in what happens in their treatments. And that is why I will not put you on the meds, as long as you agree to the rest of my treatment plan."   
"What do I have to do?"   
"From what you've said and from what I have seen the hallucinations have gone away, but I want to be completely sure of that. I want you to stay here for evaluation for the next week. During the week you will participate in private therapy with me and will attend a group therapy session that I hold for people that have been through this. Then once you have received a clean bill of health, you can go back to Horizon, but once a week you will continue therapy with me and you participate in the group session that I have for people that have been through this. If after a month you have had no signs of the hallucinations then the treatment with me will cease and you will continue at Horizon."   
"I guess I don't really have a choice but to agree with you. If I want to go back to Horizon, I either do this or go on meds and I won't do that."   
"Well then I will call Peter and let him know what I have decided."   
"Can I call him?" Shelby asked. Dr. Thomas looked at her curiously. "I had a lot of time to think while I was gone this last month and one thing I decided was that I am taking an active part in the healing process. I would like to call him and tell him what we've agreed too."   
Dr. Thomas looked at her for a moment and then agreed.   
  
"Guess this means we're off to the airport?" Sophie said after Daisy had thrown the last of her luggage to go back to Horizon in the trunk.   
"I want to make a stop first if that's ok." Daisy said.   
"Where?" Sophie asked.   
"The graveyard." Daisy said. "I'd like to visit mother since I'm here."   
Sophie nodded in understanding. "Sure."   
  
Sophie waited in the cab while Daisy walked across the graveyard. She didn't stop at her mother's but instead walked around some of the headstones nearby. After a few moments she finally stopped in front of one. She looked down and read the name: Alan Nathaniel Liponowski.   
Daisy knelt to the ground by the grave suddenly overcome by emotion. "I never knew you." She said quietly. "But you we're my brother."   
"From what dad says you were really something special. Something that they really wanted."   
"I always wondered what would happen if I had had a sibling. Guess it's kind of like wondering what it would be like to really have a mother and father." She paused. "But I get that now. I never got to know our mother. She was just to out of reach for me. I have a chance now to know dad. It might be late, but it's better then never."   
"I hope mom's better to you up there then she was to me here. I hope that the two of you finding each other again makes her happy." Daisy leaned over and brushed her hand across the gravestone. "Take care of her Alan Nathaniel. I'm counting on you to help her out until I can get their and have a chance to get to know her."   
She stood up then from the grave and walked across to her mothers grave site. "I know you saw everything that happened while I was with dad. I know you know we made up. It feels good to have forgiven him. And so I'm forgiving you. I guess it doesn't count much that your gone and daddy was always so much easier to hate, but I forgive you both. Honestly. Because I can't hate you two anymore. Not for not telling me about my brother, not for not showing me your pain, not for not caring, or for caring too much. It takes to much out of me. It hurts too much to hate you guys and so I'm done."   
"I hope your happy with Alan. I hope he was worth everything that you gave up for him. Because whether or not you and daddy knew it, you had a daughter as well, not just a son. But I forgive you. Of everything."   
"Have a nice thanksgiving mom." She said and then turned and headed back to the cab.   
"You ok?" Sophie asked.   
"Deja Vu." Daisy said with a shiver.   
"What?"   
"You said that to me last time we we're here right before dad showed up."   
"Oh." Sophie said with a smile. "So are you ok?" She asked after a moment.   
"I don't know." She said with a shrug. "This day has just been so long. First the accident and you showing up and then talking with my dad and then coming here, and now going back to Horizon where Shelby is at least in the vicinity of it."   
"Long day." Sophie agreed nodding and then the two of them climbed into the cab and headed back to Horizon.   
  
  
Going Home part four (Thanksgiving day)   
  
Daisy rolled over in bed and stared at the cieling for a moment, wondering if the last day had been a dream.   
Just then Juliette walked by her bed.   
"Did I actually leave Horizon?"   
Juliette looked down at Daisy oddly. "You went to visit your dad."   
Daisy drew the pillow up, covered her face and groaned.   
"It's good to see you too Dais."   
Daisy moved the pillow and turned to where Kat was standing in the doorway.   
"Ok, now I'm confused." Daisy said.   
"It's thanksgiving Daisy. I'm here to visit... and participate." She said with a slight gleam in her eye.   
"Oh yes." Daisy said. "What fun fanfare we have today."   
"Seems not much has changed." Kat said walking into the room and sitting down on one of the beds.   
"More then you realize." Daisy said sitting up in bed. Kat looked at her with a nod of understanding, but said nothing. "Everythings different now."   
Juliette nodded. "Yea. And things with Shelby are confusing too." She said joining them on the bed.   
"Yea." Daisy said in agreement.   
"You guys have been through so much this year." Kat said. "We all have. And I know you guys are worried about Shelby, but I'm sure things will be fine. So why don't we forget about everything for one day and just enjoy thanksgiving."   
Daisy looked at the ceiling for a moment. "I can certainly try. It would probably do me some good."   
Juliette nodded. "I'm in." She said and then stood. "It's good to have you back Daisy, it was lonely here until Kat showed up."   
"Well, I'm back now and soon Shelby will be too."   
"I hope so." Juliette said. "I'm going to head to breakfast, do you want us to wait on you?"   
"No. I'm going to take a shower and then I'll be there."   
Kat and Juliette nodded and then turned and headed out of the dorm.   
Daisy grabbed her stuff and headed in to take a hot shower. After the last two days she needed to unwind. "I guess I'll just take Kat's advice and forget about it for today."   
She stepped into the shower feeling glad that she could actually do that. With the weekend being a holiday, Peter and Sophie had pretty much decided to not talk to her about what had happened at her fathers yet. They had said if she wanted to talk to them they would listen, but if not, it could wait until Monday and they could all enjoy the holiday. Daisy was happy about that. The day before seemed like a dream and when she and Sophie had arrived late the night before all she had wanted to do was sleep. And now she could take the whole day and spend it relaxing. Shelby was back in Agnes even though not at Horizon and from what Daisy knew she was doing well, and while she hadn't yet talked to the other cliffhangers she hoped they were doing better then she was and that if they weren't that they were taking the holiday off as well. She stepped out of the shower, dried off and dressed quickly. She then headed towards the lodge, glad to be back at Horizon.   
  
"Hey Daisy. How are you?" Ezra asked the moment he saw her.   
"Ok." Daisy said, hiding her face slightly behind her hanging hair. "It was a tough visit home."   
"How's your dad?" Auggie asked.   
"Better." Daisy said. "It will be some time before he's back on his feet, but he'll get there."   
"Are you happy with that?" David asked.   
"Of course she is." Juliette said to David as though he were stupid.   
"Hey not everyone's happy about everything." He said defensively.   
"If you two are done now," Daisy said to the two of them as though they were children, "Yes," She said looking at David, "I am happy about it... now."   
David gave a slight nod of understanding that only Daisy seemed to catch.   
"Hey guys, you better be eating soon, because the day is about to start and Peter has a suprise for you guys." Kat said.   
"A suprise?" Scott asked from where he sat draped across his chair. "What are we third graders?"   
"No. But I think it's something you guys will enjoy." Peter said walking up behind them. "Remember you guys are to meet in the lodge at ten."   
They all nodded and then broke off to get breakfast and discuss what Peter's suprise was.   
  
At ten oclock all the cliffhangers sat in the lodge with Sophie standing before them.   
"So where's the suprise?" David asked.   
"We're going to get to that, but the suprise comes with a few stipulations." Sophie said.   
"There's always a catch." Daisy said.   
Sophie threw a look to Daisy who shrugged in response. "Anyway, this has a few stipulations. Peter and I feel that after everything you guys have been going through lately that it might be nice if you had a day off."   
"Like a day out of Horizon?" Ezra asked hopefully.   
"Not quite. More like spending today doing no counseling or therapy or discussion unless one of you feels compelled to do so."   
"So we get to decide if we have group?" Auggie asked.   
"Right." Sophie said with a nod.   
"But it's a holiday I thought we didn't have group today?" Juliette asked.   
"Well, " Sophie said bowing her head slightly, "It's possible that after you guys get your suprise that you might want to."   
"What kind of suprise would make us want to have group?" David asked.   
"How about me?"   
The entire group turned as one staring at a somewhat thinner, but still alive, Shelby. Peter stood slightly behind her.   
Nobody said anything for a few moments. "Isn't anybody going to say anything?" She asked wondering once again if she had made the wrong choice to come back.   
"You're back?" Scott choked out.   
"She's back for the holiday and then she'll be back in a week or two after the hospital has ok'd her." Peter explained.   
"Yea, they want to make sure that whole hallucinating thing has gone away." Shelby joked.   
"How can you make a joke about that?" Scott suddenly snapped standing to his feet. 'You've been gone a month. We didn't know if you we're alive or dead, especially after the way you left. And now your making jokes about it."   
Sophie started to say something, but Peter gave a slight shake of his head. Shelby needed to do this; she needed to hear it.   
"What am I supposed to do Scott?" Shelby snapped back, thinking of how good it felt to say his name. "Am I just supposed to curl up somewhere and be all woe is me, sorry but that's Juliette's department."   
"You don't need to be dragging her into this. It was you that left." Auggie said standing up.   
"Don't you think I know that I left?" Shelby asked. "I wasn't exactly in my right mind when I did it, but I did it. And I came back."   
"For how long?"   
"What?" Shelby asked looking down at the person who had said.   
"I asked for how long?" Daisy said looking up at Shelby from underneath her long bangs. "You ran away a few months ago Shelby, you come back and then you ran away again. How long are you back for?"   
Shelby was momentarily taken aback by the question. She then looked at her hands. "It's not easy out there you guys." She said softly.   
"Why do you think we're here?" Juliette asked.   
"I can't explain it." Shelby said. "When I was out there...what happened, what I did was different."   
"So what did you do out there this time Shelby? Did you sleep around for free instead of for money? Perform a few extra favors?"   
"You better be taking that back David!" Scott snapped and Peter started to interfer this time, but Sophie stopped him. She had been watching David over the last few weeks and it seemed to her that he had been sacrificing himself for the greater good of the group. Every now and then he only said such things to be a jerk, but other times he did it to help. He was a lot like Shelby, knowing just the right buttons to push.   
"You have no right to say that." Shelby said throwing a glare at David.   
"Why because you would never do anything like that?" David asked standing up. "Oh, I'm sorry, that used to be your job."   
"You jerk." Shelby said and jumped on him before anyone could stop her. She pushed him to the floor which he hit hard. She pinned him and leaned over until she was only an inch or so away from him and said, "There are a lot of things that I have done in my life that I am not proud of, a lot of things that you will never know of or understand, but I will never, ever, allow you or anyone else make me feel that what I have done is beneath you. You don't know the lengths someone will go for food, or water... or safety." She said and then pressed down harder on his chest with her knee which she had placed there to pin him. "When I ran this time, I spent some time thinking. Spent a lot of time figuring out where I went wrong in my life and trying to get rid of the depression and hurt that I feel. And I'm not going to take it anymore." She nudged her knee into him again and he held his breath trying to block the pain. "This is a move I learned from a friend of mine while I was away. I may have had nowhere to go before and no one but myself to depend on, but I want that to change. I need to deal with what's happened in my life. I need you guys." She said to all of them even though she was glaring directly at David. "And I'm sorry for leaving and I'm sorry that you guys can't trust me. But there is a lot that you don't know. It's not an excuse and it's not volunteering me to tell all. I accept what I did though. I came back to work all of this out, because I'm not ready to be out their on my own again, even if I can do it without sleeping around, which is exactly how I made it this time, David." She spat grinding her knee into his stomach and watching him squirm. "I'm here to stay." She said sitting up as she shoved David back to the floor, before dropping back on her knees beside him. "As long as you guys want me."   
No one said anything, a bit shocked by the new and somewhat frightening Shelby.   
"No offense, Shel, but I ain't about to argue with a girl that can put me flat on my back in a matter of seconds." Ezra said holding his hands up in surrender.   
"You had your reasons." Auggie said with a shrug. "I can forgive as long as your ok now."   
"I'm going to be." Shelby said with a small smile to Auggie.   
"That's good enough for me." Juliette said. "But I don't do that woe is me thing."   
"Yes you do." Shelby said throwing Jules a look.   
"No I don't." Juliette said pouting and then she smiled. "It's good to have you back."   
Shelby nodded and smiled. "It's good to be back. It's hard out there." She paused. "But I'd prefer to talk about it on a different day. I'm doing better and it's thanksgiving. I think we should celebrate."   
"We still have a lot to work out." Scott said suddenly looking right at Shelby.   
Shelby nodded bowing her head slightly. "Yea, we do." She said softly.   
"You left."   
"Yea, I did."   
"We'll talk about it later?" Scott asked.   
"Yea, we will." Shelby said with a nod.   
"So how about you Dais?" Shelby asked not looking at her best friend or at who used to be her best friend. Out of everyone, Shelby had hurt Daisy and Scott the most by her leaving.   
"I've been in a forgiving mood lately." Daisy said with a slight smile, but then her smile turned serious. "We really need to talk though."   
"I have all the time you need once I'm officially back here." She said.   
Daisy nodded.   
After a moment, Peter cleared his throat breaking the moment. "We have a game to play, if this can wait until after the holidays."   
"After... the... holidays." David groaned his opinion from his place on the floor.   
"I agree with floor boy." Ezra said with a smile.   
"Shut up." David said reaching out, grabbing Ezra's ankle and pulling him to the floor next to him.   
Ezra cried out as he started for the floor and grasped for anything, his hands landing on Daisy, who grabbed Scott to stay steady, who knocked into Auggie, who fell into Juliette, who caught ahold of Shelby and all seven ended up on the floor.   
"David."   
"Yea?"   
"You have five seconds to get a head start and then were sending Shelby after you." Scott said.   
"You can't be serious?" David said sitting up.   
"One." Scott said.   
David got to his feet and looked at Peter and Sophie. "You're not going to let them do this are you?"   
Peter and Sophie smiled at each other and then David before turning to walk away.   
"Two." Daisy said.   
David looked at them. "I'm sorry." He said.   
"Three." Auggie said shaking his head as he made it to his feet and began to help the others up.   
"Four." Juliette said standing with Auggie's help. "I would run if I were you."   
Shelby took a step forward and David turned and took off running out of the room.   
"Five." She said and then turned back to the others. "So are we going to go compete with the counselors or what?"   
"Let's go get em." Auggie said taking Juliette's hand as they started to walk out. The others made similar announcements of agreement following the two out of the room, leaving Shelby standing in the doorway and Scott standing a few feet away.   
Scott walked over to the doorway and turned and looked at her. "After the Holiday." He said and Shelby gave a slight nod as he walked out of the room. 


	34. People Change

PEOPLE CHANGE  
  
Chapter 1: Shelby  
Shelby sat in the quiet office, in the overstuffed dark marroon leather couch. She had gotten used to the silence. The long talks and working things out for herself. It was something that had been happening ever since she had started the therapy sessions with Dr. Thomas three weeks before.   
"It's not like I didn't expect it." She said softly. "I did. I guess it's just that once it happened I didn't expect it to go as well as it did. I didn't expect him to want the same thing."  
FLASHBACK  
Shelby sat on the dock across from Scott. She had promised she would meet him once she returned to compus and now that she'd been back for over twenty four hours, she had decided it was time.   
She had thought long and hard about what she would say. About how hard it would be to say it, but this was the only way. They both needed time - to heal and to grow. It was important. If they didn't have it, they would never be good for each other. Would never make it together.  
"Scott," She said softly looking over into his eyes, "I know I have hurt you. We've both hurt each other - more then once. Maybe it's because of our past, maybe it's the way we were raised, but right now, that doesn't matter."  
She paused watching for his reaction. "I love you, but right now that's not enough. I need to learn to deal with the things that have happened in my life, with the support of my friends and even my family. But I can't do that with a boyfriend, not right now."   
By the end of her statement she was no longer looking at him and while she had practiced many times what she was going to say, it still hurt more then she thought it would.  
"I know."  
Shelby looked up suprised by the words that he spoke. "I know." Scott repeated regretfully. "You were the first person I ever told." He said. "And the first person I ever loved, but it's not enough. For either of us." He smiled sadly. "We both carry to much baggage. And the same baggage."  
Shelby wasn't sure what to say. She took a deep breath trying to find lost words. "I didn't want it to be like this." She said softly.   
"Me neither." Scott said softly. "But I think if we both take some time. Heal from what's happened in our lives that we'll be better off."  
"How long have you been thinking about this?"   
Scott almost laughed. "It took me awhile to see it. I mean, when you left I didn't give up. I thought you'd come back for me."   
"I did." She protested, knowing it was a lie.  
"No." Scott said sadly. "You came back because Horizon is where you need to be. Because you need to heal and your ready to do it. I see that. And I'm ready to heal now too." His voice was full of emotion as he said, "We just can't do it together."  
Shelby didn't bother to brush the tears from her cheeks. "I'm sorry."  
"Me too."   
They were both silent listening to the night. "Do you think we can still be friends?"  
"I never thought we wouldn't be."  
"We haven't really talked about what happened." Shelby said.  
"Your not ready to. When your ready I'm here."  
Shelby leaned forward and hugged him, holding onto him hoping this wouldn't be the last time, but knowing that for awhile it would be.  
"How did we get to this?" She asked softly through her tears.  
"I'm not sure." Scott said gruffly. "But if we would have tried to work this out, I'm not sure we'd ever be able to be friends."  
"Yea." Shelby said reluctantly pulling back from him. "It's the ones that wait too long that end up hating each other."  
Scott nodded. He wiped the tears from his own eyes and took a deep breath, "Friends?"  
"Yea." Shelby said as she wiped her own face free of tears.   
"I guess we should head back before Peter catches us." Scott said.  
"Yea." Shelby said reluctant. She stood and as Scott turned she caught his arm, "I'm sorry for everything that I've done to you. I know that I hurt you by leaving and pushing you away, but I'm not going to do that now."  
Scott nodded. "I'm sorry too - for everything that I did. For pushing, for not understanding."  
The two turned and headed back for campus together. They had been walking for a few minutes when Scott said, "I think we both learned something from all of this."  
"What's that?" Shelby asked.  
"That we both have a lot of healing to do."  
END OF FLASHBACK  
  
"Scott was right. We both do have a lot of healing to do before we can be together again." She paused. "But I learned something else, and that's that sometimes love isn't enough. We both love each other, but we hurt each other to much because of our own problems that we can't be together. At least not now."  
"So you think the two of you will end up back together?" Dr. Thomas asked.  
Shelby shrugged. "I don't know. I can't think about that right now. I need to concentrate on me. And getting better. After that - who knows. Maybe we will end up together again, maybe not."  
"So you worked things out with Scott and he seems to understand, what about the other cliffhangers?"  
Shelby sighed. "Things with Daisy and I aren't the same. We were close friends, best friends. She was the first to know about my life on the street. I went with her to her mom's funeral and we just were there so much for each other, and then this happened. While I was away a lot happened with her dad."  
"He was in the accident right?"  
"Yea." Shelby said. "The two made up." A pause. "Things aren't the same between us. I didn't let her be there for me and I wasn't there for her. I'm not sure things will be the same again. We made up, but things are different."  
  
FLASHBACK  
Shelby stood in the girls dorm unpacking. She had just gotten the ok to return to campus a few hours ago and now after an unnecessary search of her belongings she was back on campus. She looked up as she heard someone come into the dorm. "Hey." Shelby says softly.  
"Hey." Daisy said as she walked into the room and placed her books on her desk. "Looks like your back." She said as she sat down on the bed.  
"Yea." Shelby said.  
"For good?" Daisy asked.  
Shelby looked at her for a moment and then said, "I have to go back for counseling sessions and a few group session things, but I'm back on campus - for good."  
"Good." Daisy said. It was silent for a moment and Daisy said, "I should probably head to lunch."  
Shelby watched as Daisy turned and headed out of the room. "Daisy wait." She called. Daisy stopped and turned around looking at Shelby. "I'm sorry I left." A pause. "And I'm sorry about what happened with your dad."  
"How do you know about that?"  
"Peter told me he wreked his car and was in the hospital. How is he?"  
"He's good." Daisy said with a slight nod. She walked into the room and sat down on the edge of her bed again. "Did you hear about anything else that happened?"  
Shelby shook her head and sat down on her own bed facing Daisy. "No. Just that."  
"We talked for a long time - my dad and I." Daisy said looking down at her hands. "I forgave him. I'm supposed to see him at Christmas."  
"Wow." Shelby breathed.  
"Yea." Daisy said. "Found out why my parents drink. That I had an older brother that died of Sudden Infant death syndrome. And visited my mothers and his grave." Shelby looked at her slightly shocked. "Looks like I still got shock value."  
Shelby nodded. "Seems like I missed a lot."  
"You did." Daisy said seriously. "I went through a lot when you left. Especially with my dad. Scott did too. You might say were not the same people we were when you left."  
"I'm not the same either." Shelby said quietly.  
"I know." Daisy said with a nod.   
It was quiet again until Shelby said, "I really am sorry that I hurt you by leaving. I know you thought it was your fault, but it wasn't. I wasn't right. You and Scott did what you thought was best for me, few people ever do that."  
"If that's your way of saying thanks, your welcome." Daisy joked.  
"No," Shelby said, "It's my way of saying I'm sorry."  
Daisy looked at Shelby for a moment. "I forgive you Shelby. You don't have to keep apologizing. It's going to take time for me to adjust to what's happened with my dad. And to get passed what happened when you left, but I forgive you."  
"You don't have to." Shelby said quietly. "I wasn't, I haven't been a very good friend to you. You have always been there for me, always listened and cared in spite of everything and I still pushed you away and blamed you and I shouldn't have."  
"I'm not going to say that I disagree with you about what you just said, but I didn't forgive you because I had to Shelby. I did it because I wanted to." She smiled slightly. "Besides I've been in a forgiving mood lately. After all I forgave my dad and he's done far more to hurt me then you have."  
Shelby smiled. "I don't know if that should make me feel better or not."  
Daisy nodded. "It's the truth though. I forgave my dad so I didn't have to hate him any longer, and I forgave you, because it's to hard to hurt from everything that's happened. Forgiving you helps me feel better."  
"So things still aren't right between us?"  
"Honestly, Shel, I don't know if they ever will be." Daisy said looking her in the eye.  
Shelby nodded, dropping her gaze. She watched Daisy's shoes on the floor as Daisy walked past her.   
END OF FLASHBACK  
  
"So we forgave each other, same as with me and Scott, but things aren't the same. The cliffhangers aren't the same. And I'm not sure if were ever going to be. Not after everything that's happened."  
"People change Shelby. It happens. And it sounds like the cliffhangers have forgiven you, now all you have to do is start again."  
"Starting over is hard."  
"Yes, it is. But sometimes it's all we can do."  
  
Dr. Thomas didn't say anything for a few moments letting the words sink in. "So that's how things are with Scott and Daisy what about the others, your family, your sister. How are they handling the death of your father?"  
Shelby takes a deep breath, "The other cliffhangers are glad I'm ok. A little concerned, but not as hurt as Scott and Daisy are. I was closest to those two."  
"What about your family? You haven't said much about them."  
"The cliffhangers are my family." Shelby said plainly. "Jess hasn't forgiven me yet for leaving. Not for running away before and not for running away this last time. I think that it's all just starting to be too much for her. With the suicide and all, things have gotten worse for her. She won't talk to me about it, so I can't explain what happened. Not even sure I want to."  
"Did the suicide upset you?"  
"I'm sad about it, in a way. When Walt had a heart attack I had wanted him dead and when he didn't die, I was dissappointed. And scared and angry. I wanted him out of my life. But the man that was my biological father, with him it was different. He admitted it. To my face. He never gave me a reason. Other then he was not right back then. But he admitted it." She paused for a moment. "And he paid for it. He took the cowards way out, but he paid for it."  
"Why do you think he took the cowards way out?"  
"I have to live with it. He doesn't."  
  
Chapter Two: Peter and Sophie  
"Well look at you mountain man, all busy at work." Sophie said walking into Peter's office.  
Peter groaned.   
"What's wrong?" Sophie asked stopping in front of his desk.  
"There are not enough hours in the day to finish all this stuff. I've got so much catching up to do from the time spent looking for Shelby and dealing with Daisy and her dad. The scholarship honoring my father isn't working to well, I have a new admit coming in and with the lack of couselors that we have sense Brad left and Megan's given her notice, that unless we find some counselors soon, we're going to have to double up."  
"Calm down." Sophie said. "Kat is here until after Christmas, and that gives you almost a month to try and find someone new. The scholarship program your trying for will be great because your doing it for your father and if you want I will take the new admit."  
"Kat has to head back to campus early, so I only have three weeks, I can't find money for the scholarship program and you can't take the new admit, you have group."  
"Well, I'm sure you can find someone in three weeks. You've already had several people apply. And why not ask Mark for the money. That's how you got the money before."  
"Soph." Peter said looking up at her, "That was a business transaction, this is donated money."  
"Well, all businesses need to have charity's to donate to, it's goodwill. Just convince him that it would be in his best interest."  
"I don't like the idea of being a charity."  
"You don't like the idea of asking your brother for help. But ever since your dad died, the two of you are getting along better."  
"We talk once a month." Peter said pointedly.  
"That's more then before." Sophie refuted. "I think you should ask, where is the harm in that."  
"The harm in it, is that he's my brother and I already know what he'll say."  
"So now your psychic?"  
"No." Peter said.  
"Well, then ask."  
"Will it get you off my case?"  
"I'm not on your case - and yes." She said smirking at him.  
"Then fine I will call and ask Mark, even though I know what he will say."  
"See problem solved, now do you want me to see if I can't get someone else besides you to take the new admit."  
"I could probably let Roger do the admit. I think he's ready. And I've been thinking about letting him do one for a while. But I still need to meet the parents. Especially with this student."  
"What's so unique about this student?"Sophie asked.  
Peter said nothing, instead he handed her the folder silently.   
Sophie opened it and read a few lines. "Oh."   
  
Chapter 3: David/Daisy/Ezra  
Daisy and David sat by the docks. It was mid morning.   
"I'm really glad that we can meet like this." Daisy said looking over at David. "With Shelby not being here I didn't have her to talk to, and Ezra just doesn't seem to understand how I feel about my dad. He gets some things, because of his parents divorce, but it's just not the same. His father isn't as agressive as ours are."  
"Guess were part of the same club." David said. "Our fathers our jerks."  
"Well, mine doesn't seem so bad right now. Not since I forgave him."  
"That must have been hard."  
"It was. Took me a long time to do it, but I feel so much better now. I can't explain it."  
"I think I know. When I visited Horizon that first time, my dad and I actually talked and I couldn't explain it, but I felt better."  
"So what happened?"   
David shrugged.   
"I won't tell anyone."  
"I know you wouldn't." David said looking Daisy in the eyes, "But, I don't know." He looked out at the water. "Things just got bad again. It was ok for a while, but things got bad between us."  
"I thought you were living with your mom when you came back?"  
"I had been, but dad started making appearances. And they weren't the good visits either. He was all over me about everything. 'Your mother says you need to try harder. Your mother thinks your not eating right. If you want to be a soldier your going to have to learn discipline.'" David mocked. "He just gets on my nerves."  
"Yea." Daisy said with a nod. "My dad said to me one time that "I was his little girl - once.' Didn't exactly go over well with me."  
"That's what you guys fought about when he came to group."  
"Yep." Daisy said with a nod. "That's when he almost hit me. Wasn't anything new though, he'd almost hit me several times before. That's why I had taken a seven iron to him. Got sent here for that. Best thing that ever could have happened."  
David was quiet for a moment and then asked seriously, "Did your dad ever hit you?"  
Daisy looked at David for a moment. "No." She said. "Came close, but no." Going on a gut instinct she asked, "Did your dad hit you?"  
David rolled his eyes and quickly turned away. "No, never. My dad hit me? I would have hit him back." Feeling the need to change the subject David then said, "So what's the worst thing your dad's ever done to you?"  
Daisy almost laughed. "There's so many things to choose from." She said sarcastically, but then she grew serious, "Actually I would say the fact that he lied. Wasn't up front with me. Because had he told me why he drank, or just told me about what had happened, I don't think I would have had as big a problem. I mean, I would have, but had I known I might have been able to do something to try and help him. Maybe could have helped my mom too." She said sadly.  
"Yea." David said. "But I wouldn't think about that too much. There's nothing you can do to change the past."  
"I know." Daisy said. "If I could everything would be different. None of us would have gone through anything bad. We all would have grown up happy kids."  
"Daisy an optimist." David joked and Daisy lightly punched him on the arm. "Hey," he said, "It was just a joke." A pause. "But you know, had we all led perfect lives none of us would have met."  
"I don't know. We might have. Fate does have her ways."  
"Well, we would have met under different circumstances. Maybe we all would have been different. Maybe you would have been the Princess and Juliette would have been the goth."  
"Now there is something I would like to see. Little miss perky dressed in goth attire."  
"I agree she's perky, but she's not all bad." David said.   
Daisy looked at him sideways. "And now who is being an optimist." She joked. "Juliette isn't bad." She said after a moment. "None of the others are. I think we all pick on each other, but I don't think any of us really find fault with each other."  
"I don't know." David said. "I think the others find fault with me."  
"Only because your an antagonsit. If you were like this all the time, I don't think people would mind." Daisy smiled suddenly. "Heck, they might even like you."  
"Oh, thanks." David said, throwing her a look.  
"You know I don't mean it, at least not exactly." She smiled at him. "Lately you have been showing the real you a little more. You talked to Scott and what you did with Shelby, why the wrong way to go about it, was still sweet."  
"You think I'm sweet?"  
"Don't get your hope up Romeo." Daisy said quickly, but then said, "But yea, I think your beginning to feel safe here and at home, and the more that happens the more I see of the real you." She looked up at him softly, "I like that side of you."  
"Well, when you got it, you got it." David flaunted puffing out his chest.  
Daisy roles her eyes, "Maybe I'm wrong."   
It was quiet for a moment and then David said, "You know how you said you liked meeting like this?" Daisy nodded. "I do too. There aren't many people that I get to talk about my dad with, who actually understand."  
Daisy nodded and looked into his eyes. "David any time you want to talk about your dad or anything else. I'm here." David nodded and looked away.  
Again it was quiet for a few moments and then David asked, "Did you really mean what you said? That I'm not as bad as everyone beleives I am."  
"Yea." Daisy said. "I meant that - your not the ass everyone thinks you are."  
"Well thanks." David says again with a laugh. "Two compliments in one day." He jokes.  
"No really." Daisy says trying to get him to be serious. "Your not."  
David just shakes it off. "Guess Horizon does that to a person."  
"Yea." Daisy says sombering up. "This year has been so difficult. But things seem better now. After seeing my dad and talking to him, things have changed."  
"Yea." David scoffs slightly, thinkng about his own father.  
Daisy catches the scoff and realizes he's thinking of his own father. She looks up at him. "Things could change for you too."  
David just shakes his head. "Yea, when pigs fly."  
Daisy shakes her head. "I used to think that." A pause. "You know David, what you told me about your father - how things just got bad. Well maybe if you talk to him, things might get better."  
"They might get worse also."  
"I won't lie, that could happen. But you'll feel better for trying."  
"Not if he does what he always does. He doesn't listen. He doesn't try. He doesn't care."  
"He does."  
"How do you know?" David shot back at her.  
"David if my father loves me, after everything he put me through, your father still loves you. He's just too afraid to admit it."  
"My dad is not afraid of anything."  
"Yea he is. He's afraid of loving you."  
David just shakes his head and looks into the water.  
  
"Hey guys." Ezra says walking up. He had been watching the two for a few minutes. Why he couldn't hear them, he could tell there coversation was private and he hadn't wanted to intrude.   
"Oh, hey Ez." Daisy says smiling up at him.   
"Hi Ezra." David says looking at him as well.  
"Uh, Peter wants us to meet in the lodge in about ten minutes."  
Daisy nods and turns back to David. After a moment she realizes Ezra is still there.  
"Anything else Ez?" She askd.  
"No," Ezra said quickly. "I just thought we could walk together."  
"Well, I'm kind of talking to David." She said apologetically. "We'll be there soon."  
Ezra nods feeling hurt. He hadn't hardly seen Daisy all week. Most of her time had been spent with David. They hadn't even sat together at breakfast that morning. Turning around he heads back down the path with his head down.  
  
Daisy watches as Ezra walks down the path. "He seems a little down." She murmers to herself.  
"What?" David asked.  
"Oh, I was just thinking that Ez seems a little down."  
Suddenly David laughs and then after getting a glare from Daisy he sobers up. "Sorry I thought you were joking."  
"About Ez being down? Why would you think that?'  
"You haven't figured it out?" David asks increduosly.  
"Figured what out?"   
"He's upset cause we're together."  
"Ezra knows there is nothing between us."  
"Between you and him or me and you?"  
Daisy looks at him taken aback. "Between me and him." She stammers.  
David says nothing for a moment and then asks, "So there's something between us?"  
Daisy regains her composure. "Yea, air." She says standing up and starting to leave. He grabs her arm before she can make her get away and she looks down at him.  
"Daisy," David pauses, "I really like you."  
Daisy looks at him for a moment. "I really like you too." She says gently. "But," She takes a deep breath. "Everything has been so up in the air lately, I don't think I'm ready to commit to anything yet."  
David nods. "That's cool." He says going back to his usual self. "But just remember I can't wait forever." He then stands and the two begin to walk back towards campus.  
Daisy rolls her eyes. "And people wonder why you don't have a girlfriend."  
"It's just cause I have my eyes on the best." Daisy starts to roll her eys again, but there eyes catch and he smiles at her. She smiles back and then naturally slips her arm into his and the two head back towards campus.  
  
Chapter 4: Auggie/Juliette/ Scott  
"I wonder what Peter wants to talk to us about." Juliette said. She was sitting next to Auggie on the couch in the lodge.  
"Probably has something to do with Shelby having come back. She's been back on campus for a week now. Things seem to be going back to normal." Auggie said.  
Juliette shrugged. "I don't know, Aug, it doesn't seem normal." She said slightly sad. "Things have changed. Daisy and Shelby don't seem as close as they were and Scott and Shelby have broken up. And all the time that Daisy and David spend together. Nothings like it used to be."  
"Things change Jules." Auggie said reassuringly. "But at least Shelby's back and she's safe."  
"Yea. And Daisy's back to, so at least I'm no longer alone in the girls dorm."  
"You always had me." Auggie said.  
Juliette smiled. "Yes I did."  
Auggie sighed suddenly. "There's something I got to tell ya Jules."  
"What is it?" Juliette asked curiously.  
Auggie dropped his head. "I'm..." He couldn't find the words to tell her. "I'm going to be going home for Christmas." He said instead.  
"That's great Auggie." Juliette said with a smile, but then her smile faded. "But we won't be able to celebrate together."  
"We'll celebrate when I get back."  
"But were having a party and everything." Juliette slightly whined.  
"I know. I'm sorry." Auggie said and he was, just not over what Juliette thought he was sorry over. "But I promise we'll celebrate when I get back, ok?" A pause. "And I'll be back in time for New Years eve, so we'll have then to celebrate."  
"I guess that will do." Juliette said thinking of the kiss they would share at midnight.   
  
"Hey, where's Peter?" Scott asked walking in.  
"Not here yet." Auggie answered. "Shelby back yet?"  
"No." Scott said his face clouding over slightly as he took a seat on one of the chairs. "She should be getting back anytime now. Roger left a little while ago to get her."  
"How she doing anyway?" Auggie asked.  
"Good." Scott said. "The therapist says as soon as she completes the required month of additional sessions, she'll be given a clean bill."  
"That's good news." Auggie said.  
"Yea." Scott said slightly sad. "I"m really happy for her."  
They all looked up as they hear Ezra come in. "Hey Ez, you find Daisy?" Juliette asked.  
"Yea." Ezra said a little darkly.  
"She with David?" Juliette asked gently. She had a feeling David and Daisy were going to hook up soon and as taken by Daisy as Ezra was, he was going to be hurt by it.  
"Yep." Ezra said as he sank down onto the couch.  
"I know how you feel Ez." Scott said with a sigh.  
"Yea." Ezra said giving Scott a look. "But at least you got the girl for a while and at least she's not with someone else right now."  
"Ok," Scott said. "Maybe I don't know how you feel."  
"I do." Juliette said reaching out and patting Ezra on the shoulder. "I remember when Scott and Shelby hooked up."  
"David and Daisy haven't hooked up." Ezra denied.  
The other three looked at each other, knowing that while technically true it was only a matter of time.  
"Your right Ez." Scott reassured.  
"Yea," Juliette said. "They haven't hooked up. They're just getting to know each other better as friends. With Shelby and Daisy not being very talkative, she needs someone."  
Ezra was about to say something, when he heard laughter.The four turned to see David and Daisy coming in the door of the lodge laughing, and Ezra would have fallen had he not been sitting down, when he noticed that they were arm in arm.  
  
  
Chapter 5: Roger  
Roger walked into the Hospitals outpatient psychiatric area. "I'm here to pick up Shelby Merrick." He said to the lady at the front desk.  
"She's still in session. It will be just a few moments. You can take a seat if you want."  
Roger nodded and walked to one of the chairs in the waiting area. This was the first time that he'd been to pick Shelby up. Normally Sophie or Peter took the duty. He sat down and picked up a magazine.  
He was flipping through the pages trying to find an interesting article when a voice caught his attention.  
Looking up he noticed a medium height young woman. Her skin was the color of cocoa and her hair was jet black.   
"I'll be back in just a moment, Dr. Sorenson." The woman said. She closed the door and stepped out of the office. Turning around she spotted Roger who was only a few feet from her.  
"Sometimes, it's the doctors who are worse then the patients." She said with a bright smile towards him.  
"Uh, yea." Roger said finding it hard to think.   
"Your not going to be a difficult patient are you?" She asked.  
"Actually, I'm not a patient at all." Roger said, glad that he was finally able to think cleary.  
"Oh?" The young woman asked. "Then why are you here?"  
"I'm picking up a student of mine. I work over at Mt. Horizon."  
"That's the high school for students that have emotional problems, right?" She asked as she placed her hands in the pocket of her white lab coat.  
"Yea, but we deal with kids with learning dissabilities and such as well."  
"Really?" She said with a smile. "I think that that school is great. What you guys do for those kids is incredibly."  
"Well," Roger said turning his head at a slight angle, "All of us ended up with second chances, some even a third and a forth. We just feel it's our way to give something back."  
"A third and a fourth try huh?" She asked a half smile curving her lips.  
"Some just take longer then others. Just means they need a little extra help."  
Suddenly a beeping sound cut into their conversation. The woman checked the pager and then said. "It was nice meeting you, but I have to go. Someone needs me upstairs." With that she turned and headed off.  
"You might want to wipe the drool from your chin."  
Roger turned to see Shelby watching him. "You done?"  
"Yea, I finished just in time to see you falling all over yourself."  
Roger shook his head and then said, "Well, let's get going, cause Peter is having a meeting with the cliffhangers in a few minutes."  
"Changing the subject won't change what I saw."  
"I wasn't falling all over myself." Roger said as they two headed out. "I was talking to a nice young woman."  
"And practically drooling." As they climbed into the truck, Shelby said, "Your setting a bad example you know. Horizon teaches us to face things head on, not avoid them."  
Roger threw her a look. "I told you Shelby." He said as he pulled out into the street and began driving back to Horizon, "We were just talking."  
"Oh, so you wouldn't be interested in knowing that her name is Alex?"  
"Alex?" Roger asked before he could catch himself.  
Shelby threw Roger a look that seemed to say I knew you were interested. "Yea, Alex." She repeated. "And she sometimes helps with the group that I come to on Wensdays."  
"Is that so?" Roger asked.  
"Yes." Shelby said. "Too bad it's Peter that normally comes to get me."  
Roger shook his head. "Any chance that this won't be around the school by tomorrow?"  
"If you admit that you like her." Shelby said.  
"I just met her." Roger said.  
"So admit your attracted." Shelby countered.  
"Fine." Roger conceded. "I find her attractive."  
"Ok, then I'll keep it to myself."  
"You know blackmailing is against the rules at Horizon." Roger joked.  
"You answered the question first though. Besides you said that I would tell in the first place."Roger sighed, knowing he'd been had. "So what's this meeting with Peter and the cliffhangers about?"  
"You're getting a new cliffhanger."  
Shelby sighs. "Great, just what we need, another change. Haven't the cliffhangers been through enough without dealing with a new member?"  
Roger looked over at her. "You'll always have to deal with new people Shelby. Whether or not you've been through a lot."  
"I know that, I do talk to Peter." She paused. "It's just that the cliffhangers are finally getting back to something relatively normal. We might not all have the same relationships we had before, but we're still a close group and a new member will only cause another change."  
"Change always happens, Shelby. It's what makes the world go. You need to learn to adjust"  
"That's all I do."  
"Well then you should be used to it." Roger glanced over at her. "Things will change and new people will come in and out of your life, you need to learn to deal with that. Life isn't easy."  
"I know that, but just once I wish it were." 


	35. A Fallen Star

***Quick Author's Note*** Please be aware that it takes me so long to post because I am posting an entire story at a time, not just chapters. I plan on starting to post more frequently though, so please continue to read and review...Please. I am also almost done with the website that I am working on for this series and should be posting the web address with the next story.  
A FALLEN STAR   
  
"Forgiveness is the answer to the child's dream of a miracle by which what is broken is made whole again, what is soiled is made clean again."   
-Dag Hammarskjöld   
  
A little while later Shelby entered the lodge. "Hey guys. Peter tell you guys the good news?" She asked sarcastically.  
"What good news?" Juliette asked.   
"We're getting a new member." Shelby said as she slid into a chair near the others.  
"A new cliffhanger? Haven't we had enough changes lately?" David asked.  
"That's what I said." Shelby admonished.  
"So we're getting a new cliffhanger." Daisy said. "That should be fun."  
"I think we should stay the way we are." Juliette slightly whined. "We have a good group going here."  
"Yea, a new member will only throw off our dynamics." Ezra said.  
"You guys can't be serious?" Shelby asked.  
"Well, a new member will throw off our dynamics but it doesn't have to be a bad thing." Scott said.  
"Yea, new blood." Daisy said raising her eyebrows with incinuation.   
"Someone else to pick on." David said. "Other then Ezzrrrraaaa."  
"Shut up, Davey." Ezra said. "Maybe a new member will kick your butt." Suddenly he perked up a little. "Hey, maybe it's not such a bad idea."  
"Ha Ha." David said throwing Ezra a look.  
"I hope it's a girl." Juliette practically squealed.  
"No one's having a baby, Princess. It's just a new member." Shelby said and everyone laughed.  
"I just meant a girl would even things out." Juliette defended herself.  
Shelby was about to respond, when Sophie walked in.  
"Hey, guys." Sophie said walkingover. "You guys will be getting a new member today so I thought we'd have group before he shows up."  
"So much for a girl." David said setting people off with laughter again.  
Sophie looked around. "What's the joke?"  
"Juliette said, she hoped it was a girl, kind of like it was a new born baby not a new member." Scott explained, but when Sophie didn't laugh or even smile, he said, "I guess it was a geographical joke - had to be there to hear it."  
"Yea." Sophie said quietly. She took a deep breath and then smiled brightly. "I guess we should start group."   
The cliffhangers noticed the change in mood in Sophie, but no one said anything as they quieted down and began group.  
  
"This is for the best Eric." Mrs. Jackson said from the front seat of the car.  
He rolled his eyes. "Whatever mom. This school is for a bunch of rejects."  
"I guess that makes you a reject then son, because you're going there." Mr. Jackson said giving his son a look. Eric rolled his eyes. "Don't roll your eyes at me." He said turning and giving Eric a stern look. "Maybe they can teach you some respect at this school."  
"Respect?" Eric asked. "It's not military school."  
"Well had they had an opening for you, that's where you'd be." His father said pointedly.   
"Mom never would have let you send me there, isn't that right mom?" Eric said flashing his sweetest smile at his mother.  
"I don't know why your always trying to pit us against each other Eric." His mother said. "Your father and I make these decisions together."  
"Yea, you two make all your decisions together." Eric muttered under his breath.  
"What did you say Eric?" His mother asked sweetly.  
"Nothing." Eric said giving her a look and then reaching over and sliding his sunglasses on. "Nothin at all."  
  
Peter and Roger stood in front of the admit building.   
"You sure I'm ready to do Admits on my own?" Roger asked. "I'm more used to bringing them in."  
"Rog, you've been here for years." Peter said.  
"But I'm not even a counselor. I substitute as one, but for all technical purposes I'm not."  
Peter paused for a moment giving Roger a sidelong glance and then said, "Would you want to be one?"   
Roger turned sharply. "Would I want to be a counselor?"   
"Yea." Peter asked. "We're looking for counselors, you've been filling in sense the beginning of summer and you know these kids almost better then their counselors do."  
"I don't know. What about someone to bring the kids in and such? I couldn't keep doing that if I'm expected to be here for the students. It's fine to do both jobs when they have a permanent counselor other then myself, but it couldn't be done all the time."  
"We could hire someone that's qualified to do that." Peter said. "And we could also hire other counselors if you don't want to move up. No one's forcing you too, but you do a great job with these kids Roger. And if you want to counsel, the job is yours."  
Roger nodded not sure what to say. "I'll have to think about it. I don't know if I want to make that kind of a change right now."  
"Well think about it and let me know."  
Roger nodded and then asked. "Are you sure I can do this admit though?"  
"You'll do fine Roger." Peter assured.   
"Thanks." Roger said with a nod. After a moment more he turned to Peter. "Any useful information on this kid?"   
Peter took a deep breath. "His parents say he got mixed up in the wrong crowd. Their not exactly sure why, but they think it might be because his acting career ended."  
Just then a car pulled into the drive way. "Guess we'll find out." Roger said to Peter, whom nodded before walking over to the car so he could greet them.  
  
Mr. and Mrs. Jackson stepped out of the car and over to where Peter was and they introduced themselves. Eric made sure to climb out on the opposite side. He turned around mostly hidden by the car. "Guess this is home sweet home." He said sarcastically to his parents.  
"Eric!" His father said sharply. "There is no need to be rude."  
"I'm not being rude." Eric said walking around the car, carrying his bag. "I was simply making a statement." He said looking his father in his eyes. "After all this is going to be my new home for awhile, since you and mom want to get rid of me."  
"Honey," His mother said reaching out and touching his arm. "We're not trying to get rid of you we're trying to help you."   
"Whatever." He said, pulling his arm away from his mother's touch. He then turned to Peter, "Well Pete," He said raising his eyebrows arrogantly. "Shall we get started?"   
Peter, somewhat suprised by the boys behavior, nodded. "Roger will take you and get you started."   
"Great." Eric said sarcastically. He then turned to his parents. "Well, it was real fun being home for the few months that I was actually in the house, it was nice to see the old neighborhood again."  
"Eric," His mother said pleadingly, "Don't do this."  
"Do what, mom?" he asked. "Tell it like it is?"  
"She means acting like a jerk." His father said glaring at him.  
"Well, like father like son I guess." Eric said. Suddenly the older man reached out to grab Eric, but Peter stepped in between the two.   
"You need to cool down Mr. Jackson." Peter said calmly, suprised by the older man's reaction.  
"See what I have to put up with Pete." Eric said straightening his shirt. He reached down and grabbed his bag. "Have fun putting up with him mom. Now that I'm gone, he only has you left to kick around." With that he turned and walked past Peter.  
  
"So I take it that you and your parents don't get along?" Roger asked as he sorted through Eric's stuff.  
"You take it right." Eric said his arms folded in front of his chest. "But I'm sure they are gone now, so it doesn't matter."  
"Out of sight out of mind." Roger said with a slight smile.  
"Right." Eric said with a nod.   
Roger took a deep breath. Eric seemed to be talking pretty easily. Not like most new admits. "Do you know why your at Horizon, Eric?"  
Eric looked up at Roger. "I'm here because my parents decided they don't want to put up with me anymore."  
Roger nodded. "Any other reason you can think of that they might have sent you here?"   
Eric looked at Roger for a moment and then caught on. "Oh." He said. "You mean the drugs. I'm clean. Besides, I don't know why they would send me here for that. They would be happier if I had overdosed."  
"That's not true Eric. If it were, they wouldn't have sent you here." Roger said looking the boy right in the eyes.  
"Yea, whatever." Eric said turning his head and staring at the wall.   
Roger picked the bag up off the floor. He'd already told Eric about the rules of Horizon. He then laid the bag on the table. "The search is over. I'm going to leave now and you can get undressed and a doctor will be in to give you a physical and to also make sure you have nothing on your body."  
Eric rolled his eyes. "I'm clean." He said again.   
"That's good." Roger said, before heading out the door leaving Eric by himself.  
  
"So how are things going in here?" Peter asked Sophie. He had been standing off to the side watching the end of their group session. It seemed that they were getting along better, but he could tell Shelby and Scott were both a little sad about not being together and that Ezra wasn't happy that David and Daisy were getting so close. But overall it seemed as if the group was healing well and setting aside their differences. For a moment he wondered if he should be putting a new member in their group at all. Especially Eric Jackson. After his shoot at Horizon the year before, he wasn't a favorite of the cliffhangers. He watched as the group ended and the cliffhangers spread out a little to hangout with one another. "Did you tell them yet?" Peter asked walking over to Sophie.   
"Did Sophie tell us what?" Juliette asked catching a snippit of the coversation.  
Suddenly all eyes were focused on Peter. "No." Sophie said quickly. "I didn't tell them."   
"Well, the member you guys are getting," Peter took a deep breath before going on, "Is someone you guys have met before."  
"Someone we've met before?" Scott asked. "Like with David. Was he a student here before?"  
"Well, not exactly." Peter said. "He's been on campus, but not as a student."  
"I can't think of anyone." Shelby said with a shake of her.  
"How long ago?" Ezra asked.  
"Last year." Peter answered.  
"The only guy we met last year that was on campus was David. And Isaac, but he's dead." Daisy said.  
"There was someone else." Peter said rocking back and forth on his heels. "He was here with a group of visitors."  
"The only visitors we had last year that I can think of were those...." Shelby's mouth dropped open and she turned in accusation to Peter. "You can't be serious?" He gave a nod and she groaned.   
Everyone else looked at her questioning. "Can someone fill the rest of us in?" Ezra asked.  
"You guys remember those acting jerks that did that promotional shoot last year. It's one of them. It has to be. They are the only other kids we met. Unless there from that prep school. Both are bad choices." Shelby said.  
"You were right the first time Shelby. It was one of those acting je.. people." Peter caught himself, shocked that he'd almost carelessly used the phrase Shelby had. "His names Eric Jackson."  
The rest of the group groaned, now understanding Shelby's distress. "Those guys were jerks Peter. How could you put him in our group?" Auggie asked.  
"People can change a lot in a year." Sophie said. "Just remember he's here because he has problems just like the rest of you."  
"I'm sure it's a big distress for him trying to figure out which hair gel to use." Juliette said causing the others looked at her.  
"What?" She asked.   
"Never heard you say anything like that before."Shelby said. "You insulted someone."  
"Well, you guys might want to remember that Horizon does have rules and I hope that you treat the new admit with the respect he deserves." Sophie said.  
"Of course we'll give him what he deserves." Scott said gruffly. Catching the look that Peter threw at him, he said, "I mean the respect he deserves."  
"Just give him a chance." Peter said.   
The discussion ended there because it was at that moment that Eric Jackson entered the lodge.  
  
There was a long uncomfortable moment of silence in the room, when they all realized exactly who each other were. Shelby in particular was not happy. When Eric had been there the year before the two had exchanged words more than once.  
Sophie could tell things were tense. "Um, why don't you guys introduce yourselves?" She asked. "Why don't you start?" She said pointing at Ezra.   
"I'm Ezra." He said dully.  
"Daisy."  
"David."  
"Auggie."  
"Juliette."  
"Scott."  
" I'm Shelby." She said giving him a hard look.  
Eric could tell they weren't happy to meet him and why he had been a bit put off at first when he realized who they were, he had hoped bygones could by bygones. Apparantly that's not the case, Eric thought. So instead of introducing himself he smiled a cocky smile, looked Shelby up and down and said,"You certainly are."   
Scott threw him a dirty look. "Keep your eyes to yourself."   
"They're my eyes - I can do with them what I please." He said glancing at Shelby and then glancing at Juliette and then glancing at Daisy. All three girls gave him a dirty look.  
"Not if I blacken them." Auggie said just loudly enough for him to here.  
"You want to try and take me." Eric asked stepping forward.  
"Hey!" Peter said. "That's not appropriate behavior here Eric." He threw a glance at the cliffhangers to give them a warning.  
"Whatever." Eric scoffed rolling his eyes.  
"Well." Sophie interrupted realizing things were going from bad to worse, "Eric needs a buddy to show him around campus." She knew she was stating the obvious, but maybe things would lighten up with a little bit of time.  
"David, why don't you show Eric around campus?" Peter said. He knew that David had never met Eric and hoped that that would be helpful in Eric getting accepted into the group.  
David mumbled something, but when he caught Peter's look he said, "I'd be happy too." With a forced smile. "Let's go." David said pushing past Eric. Eric scoffed, but then turned and followed David.  
Peter watched as the other cliffhangers dismissed themselves and headed off in various directions. He then turned to Sophie, "Well I think that went well, how about you?"  
Sophie gave Peter a look and then turned and headed out of the lodge.  
  
The second David was out the door he stopped and turned to Eric. "Over there are the girls cabins, and next to it is the guys cabin. We were just in the lodge, that way are the playing fields and you saw the main building when you came to campus. Tour done." David said as he finished pointing out the highlights of campus.   
Eric glared at David. "You're supposed to be giving me a tour, not barely pointing things out to me."  
"Well you've been on campus before." David said annoyed.  
"It was almost a year ago."  
"I just figured you had a good memory. After all you do spend a lot of time memorizing lines." David paused then and then shook his head, "Oh wait I'm sorry, I forgot that you were a hollywood flunky."  
Eric pierced his lips together. "And I forgot that you were a societal reject. At least I made it to hollywood. You probably barely made it out of middle school."  
"What's going on here?" Both boys turned at the sound of a male voice to see Peter and Sophie standing by and watching them.   
"I was just about to start the grand tour." David said with a fake smile.  
"Yea, right after he gave me the highlighted details from here." Eric mumbled.   
Peter could sense the tension between the two and wondered how much of a problem Eric joining the group was going to be. He looked to David and said, "Make sure you show him where everything is, remember that he is going to have to be able to find his way around." Peter then faced Eric, "Just like you'll be expected to find the places so pay attention as he gives you the tour." Both boys nodded and then turned and headed off.  
"Well, the next few days ought to be interesting." Sophie said.  
Peter nodded. "They most certainly will be."  
  
David walked quickly through the main part of campus, barely letting Eric keep up with him as he walked.   
"And this is the woodshed." David said as he hurried past the wood shed, barely pointing to it.  
"Some tour guide you are." Eric said as he tried to keep up with David.  
"You have a problem with me?" David asked turning to face Eric.  
"No, I just wish you'd actually show me where things are. You know that's usually what someone who's showing you around is supposed to do. Or are you too dumb to know that?"  
David clenched his teeth, "You know what? Maybe you wouldn't need a tour guide if you were smart enough to figure out where everything was. I guess your just too used to the star's life and being catered to."  
Eric glared at David, "You don't know a thing about my..." Eric stopped himself. "Nevermind. I don't need this." With that, Eric turned and headed away.  
  
"So how did the admit go?" Peter asked as Roger walked into Peter's office and joined him and Sophie. The two of them had headed back here after the group session to talk about ways to try to bring the new cliffhanger into the rest of the group.  
"That kid has a lot of anger." He said. "You've got your work cut out for you Sophie."  
Sophie nodded. "I always do."   
"So he did say something?" Peter asked still wanting to know how the boy had acted once away from his parents.  
"He is really mad at his parents. Most new admits are though, but from what we witnessed outside I think it's obvious that him and his father have some things to deal with. He talks pretty easily about some things, but there is still a lot that he doesn't speak of. And his bag search was clean." Roger said. "What did his parents say?"   
Peter took a deep breath. "His father apologized for his display of anger and said that that's the first time it's happened. He says Eric intentionally tries to provoke him. His wife stood by his side and agreed with everything he said."  
"That didn't look like the first time to me." Roger said looking at Peter.  
"It didn't sound like the first time either. Before Eric walked away he said some thing to his mom about watching out, because now that he's gone, she's the only one he has to kick around."  
"Wow." Sophie said. "Do you think abuse is involved?"   
"I think it's highly likely considering the boys behavior towards his parents and the way his parents acted." Peter said. "But it's too early to tell."  
Sophie nodded. "Well at least I have an idea of what I'm working with. Normally I go in knowing nothing."  
"Remember to not assume, Sophie. We won't know anything for sure unless he tells us." Peter said. "So be careful about what you say."  
  
"How did the tour go?" Daisy asked as David walked over to where she was sitting in the lodge.  
"That guy is such a jerk." David muttered angrily.   
"Well I could have told you that." Daisy said as she looked up from the homework that she was working on. It was then that she noticed how angry David was. Her eyes narrowed. "You ok?"  
"Yea." David said with a short nod. "It's just that that guy really gets on my nerves."  
Daisy watched him for a moment. She noticed that he was anxious. Clenching and unclenching his fists. His body almost shaking. "David, are you ok?" She asked concerned. She had never seen him like this before.  
"Yea, yea." He muttered looking at her. "I'm just going to get out of here now. Take a walk or something."  
He turned to go and Daisy called his name. "Do you want me to go with you?" She asked. David shook his head and quickly headed off.  
  
A while later Scott walked over to where Daisy, who had been joined by Shelby a few moments earlier, was sitting at the table in the middle of campus. "What's up with David? He's going psycho on that punching bag in the shed."  
"Eric." Daisy and Shelby both said together.  
"What a jerk." Scott said. "Doesn't that kid know how to get along with anybody?"  
"What kid?" Peter asked walking up behind them.  
"Eric." Scott said with disgust.  
"He causing problems?"  
"He pissed David off." Scott said. "He's in there beating the crap out of your punching bag, so that he doesn't kill him."  
"That so?" Peter asked, glad that David was finally showing some control, but not happy that it was because of Eric.  
"So where is Eric?"  
"Don't know." Scott said. "David gave him the tour. Haven't seen him sense."  
  
Peter walked into the shed to find David throwing hard punches. He was covered in sweat and he was breathing hard as he repeatedly punched the bag fast and furiously.  
"You seen Eric?" Peter asked. when he didn't recieve an answer he walked over closer to where David was. Speaking a slight bit louder, he asked again, "David, have you seen Eric?"  
David still didn't seem to hear Peter. His anger not subsiding as he furiously beat his fists hard against the punching bag, muttering soft curses as he did so.  
Peter realized that David was clearly upset about something. Something that was far more than Eric.  
"David!" Peter snapped, but the teens attention was still on pulverizing the bag.  
Taking a dangerous chance, Peter stepped forward and quickly grabbed David's swinging arms. When the boy began to shove him away. Peter tightened his group and said, "It's ok David, it's just me, Peter. It's ok, your safe here."  
Just as suddenly as the rage had kicked in, it left. David stopped moving, freezing in Peter's arms when he realized where he was.   
"You ok David?" Peter asked relaxing his grip only slightly.  
"Yea. I'm fine." David murmered breathing hard. "You want to let go of me?"  
Peter paused for a moment trying to think of the best course of action. "Yea." He said releasing his grip on David, but keeping himself between the only exit and David.   
David took several steps forward finally free of the restraining grip. Not knowing what else to do, he walked to the table against the wall and began to take the boxing gloves that he was wearing off.   
"You want to talk about it?" Peter asked gently.  
David took a deep breath trying to slow his breathing. "The new guy gets on my nerves. There's not much more to tell."  
Peter took a step forward walking around the edge of the punching bag. "I've had people get on my nerves before, but I've never reacted like that."  
"Maybe that's because your not me!" David snapped, turning to Peter. Immediatly after saying it he dropped his head. "Sorry." He apologized.  
Peter nodded, keeping his body language calm and his voice gentle. "I wasn't assuming, David, I was just trying to figure out what made you so upset."  
David turned away from Peter for a moment. "The kid called me dumb."   
Peter was glad David wasn't looking at him or else he would have seen the suprise on his face. Peter quickly masked it and then said, "I thought you didn't care what others thought about you?"   
David had made the comment before in a private session between the two. Peter had always figured that David wasn't one to give much thought to other people, but lately Peter had been seeing a whole new side of the teen. Including the fact that he actually did care about others and what they thought.  
"Well I lied, alright?" David snapped. "He called me dumb." The teen's voice then grew quiet. So much so that Peter almost didn't here him as he said, "He's probably right, so it's no big deal. You should just go find him and finish the tour yourself."  
"You are not stupid David." Peter said firmly.  
David looked up suprised that Peter had heard the coment, but immediatly the suprise was gone and replaced by a protest, "Yea, not stupid at all, that's why my...." David stopped just as quickly as he had started. He shook his head. He wasn't going to say that, not here - not now.  
"That's why your what... David?" Peter pushed gently.  
"Nothing." David said turning away.  
"You said 'that's why my...' Finish the statement David." Peter pushed again.  
"No!" David snapped. "It's nothing alright, just let it go." David started to make his way past Peter, but Peter grabbed the boy's arm and going on a gut feeling pulled the boy close to him in a tight hug.  
David started to fight him, but realizing he wasn't going to get away gave up the fight and welcomed the embrace.   
"You are not stupid David." Peter said again.  
"Then why doesn't anybody want me?" The question was out before David realized what he was saying.   
Peter gripped the boy tighter. "You are wanted, David. Somebody will always want you."  
David nodded skeptically and Peter relinquished some of his hold. "Why don't you tell me why you're feeling this way and maybe the two of us can work some of this out?"  
David nodded, but didn't look at Peter.   
Peter reached out and forced David to turn to look him in the eye. "It's ok to feel something when somebody else calls you a bad name. Your a good kid David and you are not stupid." Peter emphasized.   
David gave another nod; this time with a bit more believability to it.   
  
A short while later Peter walked slowly down the path towards the docks. For some reason he had a feeling that that was where Eric was. As he neared the docks he could see a lone figure sitting with their feet dangling off the edge. Peter didn't say anything, he just walked over and sat down next to the teen.  
"You been talking to David?" The question came after a moment of silence.   
"Yes." Peter said calmly. "You upset him with what you said."  
"What about what he said to me?" Eric asked. Peter looked at Eric suprised for a moment. Eric shook his head. "Should have known he wouldn't mention that. You know, he blasts me for having the so called perfect life and freaks out because I call him stupid, what about the fact that he called me stuck up?"  
"Neither of you should have called the other anything." Peter said neutrally. "Horizon has rules."  
Eric shook his head. "'Horizon has rules, Horizons a safe place, blah, blah, blah," Eric mocked him. "I keep hearing that, but I have yet to see it."  
"You've been here less then two hours Eric, give it a shot."  
"Kind of like they gave me a shot?"   
"Eric, they were suprised to see you. Things didn't go well when you were here last time, but trust me, things will get easier, they just have to get to know you better."   
The young man didn't say anything for a moment. "I just thought this place was going to be different." He muttered.  
"What was that?" Peter asked having not heard what the boy said.  
Eric started to repeat what he said, but then thought twice. He had come here to start over. To get away from his parents and family and his old life. Maybe he could still make this work. "I said, I'll give it another try."  
"Good." Peter said, then he added, "And you need to apologize to David."  
"Only if he apologizes to me." Eric said quickly.  
"That seems fair." Peter said. After a moment he asked, "Were you able to finish the tour?"  
"I was barely able to start the tour." Eric said with a slight smile.  
Peter smiled too. "Well, after you and David work things out, I'll have him finish showing you around, it will be a good way for the two of you to get to know each other."  
Eric looked at Peter skeptically for a moment. He had a feeling he and David were not going to get along any time soon, but maybe the man before him was right. Maybe they all had just gotten off on the wrong foot. Besides he hadn't exactly been friendly to them when he showed up. "Ok." Eric said with a nod and a smile and he and Peter stood up and headed off to start his tour.  
  
Peter and Eric were headed to find David when he spotted Sophie heading towards the football field. "Hey Sophie!" Peter called, causing his fiance to turn and walk over to him.  
"Hey Peter," She said with a smile. "Hey Eric. How are you guys doing?" Peter had told Sophie about what had happened with David before he'd gone in search of Eric.  
"We're good." Peter said.   
"Good." Sophie said. She glanced over her shoulder to where Roger and the Ridge Runners were heading towards the football field. "I should probably go, the Ridge Runners have challenged the Cliffhangers to a football game. I've already told Roger we can do it."  
"Football?" Eric asked suddenly.  
"Yea, Eric." Sophie said, "Why do you play?"  
"A little. We played last year when I was here."  
"That's right." Peter said knowingly. "The underground game between the actors and the students."  
"Yea, sorry about that." Eric said with an embarressed smile, knowing that the students hadn't been supposed to play that game.  
"Well this game is allowed, but it isn't tackle." Sophie said with a friendly smile.   
"Can I play?" Eric asked.  
Peter looked at Sophie, suprised that the boy actually wanted to participate, but hadn't he just told the boy he needed to give the Cliffhangers a second try. "The tour can wait till after the game, besides it might assist with some team work."  
  
Peter, Sophie and Eric walked to the field where the cliffhangers and ridge runners were waiting.  
"Well look what we have here?" Ezra said nodding his head in the direction of where the two adults and Eric was. The cliffhangers stopped tossing the football around and turned to look in the direction indicated.   
"The star lives." David said with sarcasm and slight anger.   
"Don't let him get to ya, David." Auggie said as he and the others all walked over forming a group. "Hollywoods not worth it."  
"Hey guys." Peter said as he, Sophie and Eric joined the group. He could feel the tension as the old Cliffhangers stood across from there new member. "Well, it's a bit unusual for the first day, but Eric asked if he could join the football game and I agreed. I thought it might give you all a chance to get to know each other a little better. Might also help with your teamwork skills."   
"The last time someone wanted to participate on their first day they turned out to be an undercover reporter." Shelby said looking at Peter.  
"You guys have met Eric before, he's not an undercover reporter."  
"No, he's just a bad actor." Scott said under his breath, causing the other Cliffhangers to laugh.  
"What was that Scott?" Peter asked, he had heard the comment and from the look on Eric's face knew he had too.   
"Just commenting on Eric's acting skills." Scott said with a not so innocent smile.  
"Or lack thereof." Daisy added.  
"That's enough you guys." Sophie reprimanded. "Now I think you owe Eric an apology."  
When no one said anything, Peter jumped in, "You guys can apologize or you can spend the rest of the day working on some odd jobs that I need done."  
The Cliffhangers looked at each other. They wanted to play, they just didn't want to play with someone who thought he was better then everyone. "Come on you guys," Sophie said, "Don't you want to play?"  
The Cliffhangers looked to their feet and before anyone could say anthing else, Roger came jogging over. "You guys ready to play?" He asked.  
"Actually I'm not sure the cliffhangers are up to it." Peter said, looking to Sophie. "I think they may have some work to do."  
"What?" Juliette asked. "I didn't say anything."  
"One down all down remember?" Auggie said looking to Juliette.   
"That's unfair. I wanted to play some football." She whined.  
"Jules wants to play football?" Shelby asked with a smile. "Wow, things have changed."  
Everyone but Eric smiled at the comment and then things grew quiet.   
"So are the Ciffhangers playing?" Roger asked after a moment.   
Peter looked to Scott raising his eyebrows. Scott had always been the undesignated leader of the group and if they were going to apologize it would be led by him.   
"Fine." Scott growled shaking his head. "I'm sorry."  
"Yea, sorry." The other Cliffhangers broke in with their apologies.  
"Looks like they will be playing." Peter said turning to Scott. "And Eric will be joining them."  
Roger nodded smiling at Eric. "You play football?"   
"A little." Eric said with a slight attitude. He was still upset about the Cliffhangers lack of acceptance.   
"Well then," Roger said ignoring the attitude and tossed the ball to Eric, who caught it easily. "Go play." With that Roger jogged over to where the Ridge Runners were.   
"David, Eric." Peter called as the Cliffhangers started to take the field. They both turned and Peter motioned for them to join him.   
"Yea Peter?" David asked once the two had joined him.   
"I think that you and Eric both owe each other an apology for what was siad earlier on the tour."  
"I really can't think of anything I need to apologize for." David said. "He called me dumb."  
"You called me stuck up."  
"Doesn't matter." Peter said. "I want you both to apologize."  
They both glared at one another for a moment. "Fine," David said. "I'm sorry your stuck up."  
"And I'm sorry that your dumb." Eric said.   
Peter started to say something to the sarcastic apologies, but both boys turned and headed for the football field.   
"So much for the idea of teamwork." Sophie said.   
  
The lack of teamwork continued for the Cliffhangers. For one, if they could keep the ball away from Eric, they did, mostly leaving him standing off to the side on his own, unless they were "accidentally" tagging him to hard. Eric had just taking his fifth "tag" of the game, when he finally said something.  
  
"What is up with you?" Eric shouted as he pushed himself up from the ground.  
"Sorry Hollywood, lost my footing." David said with a smirk.  
"Yea right." Eric spat.   
"Do we have a problem here?" Roger, who was reffing the game asked, coming over.  
"No problem." David said quickly.  
Eric shook his head. "No problem at all."   
  
Heading back to the line, Eric decided he'd had enough. So when Scott threw the ball, Eric ran across the field shoving the others out of the way and jumping and catching the ball.  
"What was that about?" Scott asked harshly walking over to Eric. "That ball was meant for David."  
"Yea, well the ball was never going to be meant for me."  
"What's that supposed to mean?" Daisy asked.  
"If you didn't want me playing you should have told me."   
"We did." David said stepping over.  
Eric shook his head. He didn't belong here.   
"What's going on?" Roger asked coming over to the group; Peter not far behind him.   
"Hollywood here, doesn't know how to play as a team." Auggie said.  
"I don't know how to play as a team?" Eric asked shocked.  
"That's what he said." Jules answered in Auggie's defense.  
"What's the problem?" Peter asked as he and Sophie joined the others.  
"Eric doesn't know how to let anyone else play the game." Shelby said.  
"Yea," Daisy added. "Apparently he always has to be a star."   
"I don't need this." Eric snapped as he threw the ball angrily. He then turned to walk away, but was stopped when he heard a startled cry. Turning back around he saw the others moving quickly towards Daisy who was doubled over.  
"You ok Daisy?" Sophie asked concerned from where she stood with one hand on Daisy's shoulder, the other on her arm.   
"Fine." Daisy gasped out. "It was - - - un - - -expected."  
Eric realized then that Daisy had been hit with the football he had thrown.   
"You did that on purpose!" Ezra snapped walking purposefully over to Eric. The others turned never having seen Ezra angry like this.   
"I..I...I...I'm sorry." Eric stammered. "I didn't see her... I swear."  
"Yea, right." Ezra snapped. "Maybe if you had been paying attention to the rest of your team it wouldn't have been a problem."   
"Look, I didn't mean...." Eric's voice trailed off as he saw the others looking at him, nothing that he said would matter - just like at home.  
Peter seeing that trouble was coming turned to David, "Take Eric and finish the tour." It was said in a tone that could not be denied.  
David stood, walked over and taking Eric's arm pulled him into a direction away from the group. "Come on Star, let's make this fast so that I can help Daisy."  
"Let go of me." Eric said jerking his arm back.  
David turned. "You should be glad I'm not pounding your face into the ground right now after what you did."  
"Well what's stopping you?" Eric asked pushing his sleeves up and preparing to take David on.   
"I can't afford to get into anymore fights." David said.  
"Oh, well you poor thing." Eric said as he headed forward ahead of David.   
"But I can still get back at you." David said softly as an evil smile graced his lips. "Hey, Eric, lets head out to the ropes course."  
  
"The rope course is this way." David said leading Eric through the woods.  
"Don't you think we should be on the path?" Eric asked.  
"Who's been going here longer?" David asked.  
"You know, if I we're you, I wouldn't brag about that sort of thing." Eric said.  
David just shrugged, the wicked smile still on his lips. He suddenly stopped. "The ropes course is just through those trees there." He said. 'Why don't you go ahead and I'll meet up with you?"  
"What are you going to do?" Eric asked.  
"Go to the bathroom." David said. "Sometimes you just gotta go."  
Eric shrugged. "Whatever man. I'll just keep walking."  
David nodded and watched as Eric walked several feet past him. David then began to take slow quiet steps backward. When David felt he was far enough away, he turned and began to run back towards campus.  
"Hey, Dave." Eric called turning to look over his shoulder, "I think your a little lost because there is no ropes..." Eric stopped talking and nodded slightly as he realized what had just happened. "We'll this is great." He says to himself as he stands with his hands on his hips looking around the woods.  
  
David emerged onto campus about an hour later, looking around to make sure no one had seen him come out of the woods alone. He headed across campus and stopped at the steps leading to the girls dorm. Scott, Shelby, Ezra, Auggie and Juliette all sat waiting on Daisy.  
"How's Daisy?" David asked as he approached.  
Shelby looked up from where she sat on the steps. "The nurse is in with her now. She had some swelling and bruising on her stomach. Sophie doesn't think it was anything serious, but they thought it should be checked just in case."   
David nodded. "I guess that's good." He said taking a seat on the steps.   
They all sat in silence for a few moments waiting until Shelby finally broke the silence by asking, "So where's your 'buddy'?" Shelby asked as David walked up to the girls dorm.  
David couldn't help the smile that tugged at the corner of his lips. "Lets just say he decided to... take a walk."   
"What did you do to him?" Juliette asked with slight astonishment.  
David looked around, trying to maintain a level of innocence. "Nothing."  
"Come on David." Auggie said. "That look doesn't sat nothing."  
"I'm not saying anything, but" David said with a smile, "I'm sure he'll be back, by say dinner."  
"David, I don't know what you did, but I wish I had thought of it first." Scott said with a smile.  
  
Eric stood in the woods for several minutes trying to get his bearings. "Well, if I wanted out, this would be the perfect way." He said to himself. "But I don't want out. My only other option is home and I'm not going back there." He looked over and thought he recognized a fallen tree. "Guess I'll go this way." He said and then began to walk down the path.  
  
Peter walked up to Scott and Shelby who were studying in the lodge. It had been hours sense the incident on the football field and Peter hadn't seen Eric or David since. "Have either of you guys seen David or Eric?" Peter asked.  
Scott and Shelby looked at each other for a moment. "David's in his dorm, but I don't know where Eric is." Scott said honestly.   
Peter nodded and turned to head to the boy's dorm. That's odd, he thought, I wonder where Eric is.   
Peter entered the boys dorm and found David sitting on his bed reading a book.  
"David, do you know where Eric is?"  
"I haven't seen him since I finished the tour of campus." David said. "Not that I'm complaining about that."  
"David." Peter said with warning.   
"What I said I wasn't complaining."   
"It's the way you said it David." Peter walked over and sat on the bed across from David's. "You guys have problems during the tour?"   
David sat up. "He still think's he's better then us Peter." David says. "The Cliffhangers don't need someone like that around."  
"We'll he's staying in your group, so you guys are going to have to learn to live with him. Which means the two of you will have to settle your differences." Peter paused. "He didn't hit Daisy with the football because the two of you don't get along. You know that right?"  
"If your asking if I think that Daisy being hurt was my fault, then I would tell you that the thought had crossed my mind, but I know it's not."   
"Good." Peter said with a smile. "Now if the two of you can get to know each other, maybe you'll find that you have something in common."  
David nodded uncommittedly and stood heading for the bathroom. "First you have to find him." He muttered under his breath, low enough so that Peter didn't hear him.   
"David." Peter said, before David walked completely away.  
"Yea?" David asked.  
"Where and when was the last time you saw Eric?"  
"Oh, we we're going to the ropes course and I had to go to the bathroom, but Eric wanted to see it, so he kept going. And that was around three o'clock this afternoon." David said.  
"Thanks." Peter said and headed out of the dorm. He headed to the lodge and found Sophie and Roger. "I think Eric might have ran."  
"Really?" Roger asked suprised. "He didn't seem like the type."  
"I thought the same thing, but no one has seen him for several hours and David said the last time he saw him was near the ropes course." Peter said.  
"So what do you want us to do?" Sophie asked concerned.  
"Well, he has three, maybe four, hours on us, so I doubt he's in town, but I'll call Curtis and have him keep an eye out. Right now I think we should search the campus and if we don't find him, then we'll gather the groups and go out looking for him." Peter said. "We need to hurry though, we'll lose the light in about two hours."  
Roger and Sophie nodded and then the three left each other to go searching.  
  
Eric stopped walking. He had been walking for hours and was now more lost then when he started. "I think I'd rather be with my dad then be here." He mumbled to himself. "When I get back, I'm going to get that kid." He said. "If I get back." Eric looked up at the sun and tried to navigate where he was. "Well that won't work, I never learned how to read the sun. After all," He ranted to himself, "I'm just an actor, what the hell would I know? It's not like I've ever been in the woods before!" He said his voice getting louder and louder until finally he was screaming. "It's not like I am dressed for this!" He looks at his cloths. "It's not like I woke up this morning thinking I'm going to get lost in the woods for hours on end because some dumb jerk decided to screw me over!' He screamed. "THIS PLACE SUCKS!"  
  
Peter, Roger and Sophie met back up in the middle of campus. "There's no sign of him." Sophie said. "He's been here for less then a day and he's already managed to vanish."  
"Looks like we're going to have to send out search parties." Peter said. "We'll take the Cliffhangers, Ridge Runners and the Wind Dancers. We meet back here in ten minutes and I'll give directions then."   
  
Eric walked through the woods. "I was a fool to think that coming here would be better then military school. At least there I would be part of something." He said to himself. He shook his head. "I'm going to so get that punk when I get back." He muttered to himself as he walked. "I wish I had water." Even though it was the beginning of December and cool out, he was warm. The temperature was higher then usual and there was no snow, and he was sweating from the walking. He wasn't used to hiking through the forest.  
Suddenly Eric spotted a building. "I made it." He said. A smile spread across his lips. "I'm going to get that kid."   
  
Peter, Sophie, Roger and the three groups stood in the center of campus preparing to start searching.The Cliffhangers, minus Daisy, who was in her dorm resting, stood off to one side talking.   
"David, maybe you should tell Peter about what you did." Juliette said nervously.  
David shook his head. "I'm sure he's fine." He said, but David didn't look at all convinced about it.  
"All right guys we'll be breaking up into groups of two or three. Stay within shouting distance of the groups around you." Peter said. "And if you see anything let us know."  
"I see something." Someone from inside the mass of people called out.  
Peter was about to tell them all that this was a serious matter, when someone else called out. Peter turned to see what they we're talking about and saw Eric wondering out of the woods and onto campus, looking tired and sweaty. "You guys are dismissed." Peter said and he and Sophie handed Roger their packs and headed over to talk to Eric.  
"We were just getting ready to send out a search party." Peter said evenly walking up to him.  
"Yea, well, it's not necessary, I'm here now." Eric said angrily as he wiped sweat off of his face.  
"Eric, wondering off into the woods on your own is not a good idea." Sophie said. "A million things could happen: you could get hurt or lost."  
"Yea, tell me about it." Eric said sarcastically, half listening to what Sophie was saying, but his eyes were on the group of Cliffhangers who we're standing in the middle of campus watching him and the two adults.  
"Eric." Sophie said. "Are you listening?"  
"I have something I need to take care of." Eric said trying to walk past them.  
"But not before we take care of this." Peter said taking the boy by the arm.   
"Let go of me." Eric said throwing Peter a look.  
Peter loosened his grip, but didn't let go. "Horizon has rules, Eric. They exist to protect you and the other's around you. You can't just go wandering off."  
"I didn't." Eric said gruffly glaring at Peter.  
"Eric, you've been missing for hours and..." Sophie said.  
"No, I've been lost for hours." Eric said pointedly. "And maybe had you asked where I had been when I came back onto campus you would have known that."  
Peter was surprised by the boys attitude, but more surprised by the fact that Eric seemed to be telling him the truth that he had been lost. Which meant Peter had just blown his first trial of trust with this kid. "Eric, I'm sorry." Peter apologized.  
"Apology not accepted." Eric said, pulling his arm from Peter's grip and walking away. He then walked across campus towards the other Cliffhangers, who watched him coming, wondering what he was going to do.   
Eric walked right up to David. Without a word, he threw a right cross, hitting David squarely in the jaw and also knocking him straight to the ground. Auggie and Scott normally would have jumped in as defense, but they we're both shocked by Eric's actions. Eric then turned and began to walk away, but David got up and ran after him. He was about to jump on him, when Peter grabbed David, and Roger grabbed Eric.  
"You guys want to tell me what's going on here?" Peter asked angrily looking between the two boys.  
"I'm sorry." Eric said breathing hard. "No wait, I'm not sorry I hit him, he deserved it."  
"No one deserves to be hit." Roger said seriously still holding onto Eric.  
"Let go of me." Eric said pulling at Roger's hold.  
"Not until we know what's going on." Peter said.  
"Well then why don't you ask Dave." Eric spat.  
"The names David." He said trying to get into his face, but Peter held him back.  
"David do you know what he's talking about?" Peter asked.  
"Why would I know? It's not like I'm the Star's keeper."  
"You jerk!" Eric shouted lunging forward.  
"Eric why don't you tell us what happened." Roger said.  
"Nothing." Eric said disgusted. "Nothing happened." With that Eric was half released from Roger's grip, half pulled himself from the grip, and walked away.  
"David?" Peter questioned turning to face him.  
"Don't ask me." David said. "The Star's just mad because he's fallen from Hollywood's grace." With that David turned and headed back to the other Cliffhangers.   
  
Peter walked around campus and found Eric sitting on the docks by himself. It had been several hours since he's come back onto campus, but Peter had wanted to give him time to calm down before trying to talk to him.  
"Hey." Peter said gently.  
"Hey." Eric replied, not taking his eyes off of the stars.  
"You missed dinner."  
"Are you on my back for a reason?" Eric snapped.  
"I'm here to help you." Peter said. "Sometimes that means getting on your back." He said honestly.  
"Well I don't want your help."   
"Eric, I don't know what happened today, but Sophie and I and all of the other counselors are always here to listen."  
"Like you listened so well this afternoon?" Eric asked his voice crisp.  
"Ok." Peter said sitting down next to him. "I deserved that, but I did apologize."  
"And I said it wasn't good enough."  
"Eric you might realize this isn't such a bad place to be if you give it a chance."  
"Give it a chance? Give it a chance?" He asked incredoulsy jumping to his feet. "All I wanted was to give this place a chance."  
"Sophie and I have seen you and the Cliffhangers arguing all day."   
"Oh, and automatically you think it's the fault of the new guy. Did you ever think maybe it was your precious students? Why don't you try going to them and asking them to tell you honestly about this afternoon and then maybe you'll realize that this isn't my fault." With that Eric walked away, leaving Peter with a sinking feeling that he had just failed a student.  
  
The Cliffhangers, minus Eric, sat in the lodge shortly after Peter's conversation with Eric. Peter and Sophie stood before them.   
"All right cliffhangers." Sophie said. "Peter and I want to talk to you about your group."  
"You mean lack of group." Daisy said sarcastically.   
"Yea," Shelby said. "It would have been nice if Eric would have shown up."  
"Eric didn't know about this meeting." Peter said.  
"Why not?" Scott asked. "Isn't he a Cliffhanger?"  
Peter nodded. "He's supposed to be. But he's not being treated like one."  
"Maybe because he doesn't act like one." David said.  
"Or maybe because you guys don't treat him like one?" Peter said.  
The Cliffhangers looked at each other. "He thinks he's better then us." Juliette said.  
"But he's not." Peter said. "Eric is here because he has problems, just like all of you do."  
"He doesn't act like he does." Shelby said. "He acts like an arrogant jerk."  
"Shelby, there are a lot of people here who act like they don't have problems." Peter said pointedly. "Look, Eric seems to think that you guys aren't giving him a fair chance and he seems to think it has something to do with his disapperance this afternoon."  
The Cliffhangers all occupied themselves looking at other things.  
Sophie looked at them. "We just want to know what happened this afternoon. Honestly." She said looking at all of them.   
"You guys either tell us or else you guys will be receiving extra work until we do find out what really happened." Peter said when no one responded after several moments.  
The Cliffhangers all turned and looked at David. "Why are you all looking at me?"   
"David, your name seems to be being brought up an awful lot. Why don't you tell us what happened?" Peter said.  
"I told you I don't know anything."  
"I know you did." Peter said. "But I think you do."  
David looked at the floor. "Fine." He said begrudgingly. "Eric was acting like a jerk and he hurt Daisy." He said in his defense. "So I thought it would be funny to play a joke on him, so I took him to the ropes course, only I didn't really take him there, I took him into the woods and then I left him there."   
"You did what?" Peter asked shocked.  
"I thought he would find his way back and he did. It just took longer then I expected. It was really just to teach him that he shouldn't mess with us." David said defensively.  
"Do you guys not remember what it's like when you first get here?" Sophie said. "It can be scary. You're in a new place, you're dealing with new things and you're life is already off track. And you guys decided to take him into the woods and leave him."  
"We didn't do it." Shelby said, "David went off on his own on this one."   
"But you guys knew about it?" Peter said, from the Cliffhangers looking away Peter could tell they had. "You guys I'm really dissapointed in you. You are above this." He shook his head. "You never gave Eric a chance and because of that it's going to be harder for him to open up to anyone at this school." The Cliffhangers hung there heads. "You guys are going to keep getting new members, you are not going to be the same seven people always. I know your a tight knit group, but you can't exclude people. That's not what your taught to do here." The cliffhangers nodded. "You guys are going to get one chance to redeem yourselfs and if you don't you'll all be on shuns."  
"What do we have to do?" Scott asked.  
"You have to apologize to Eric and convince him that you want him to be part of the group." Sophie said.  
"But that'll be impossible." Juliette whined.  
"It's shuns or apologize." Peter said. "You guys know what the right thing to do is." With that Peter and Sophie turned and headed out of the lodge. "Oh, and you guys have until breakfast to fix this." With that they left.  
"How are we going to convince him by tomorrow morning?" Juliette asked with a sigh.  
"Maybe it's an impossible task." Daisy said.  
"It's not impossible guys." Auggie said. "But I think we're going to have to start by apologizing. And then possible begging."  
"I don't beg." Shelby says she looks around the group. "I don't beg - anymore."  
"So we apologize," Ezra said, "But I don't think that will be enough. He barely knows us and we screwed him over, he's not going to want to listen to us."  
"Well, first we'll apologize," Auggie said, "And if that doesn't work, we'll show him."  
  
"Hey Eric." Auggie called walking into the boys dorm. "Eric?" He called again.   
"What?" Eric asked walking out of the bathroom in sweats and a t shirt, his hair wet. He had just finished his shower a few minutes before.   
"Why isn't your stuff unpacked?" Auggie asked watching Eric stack his packed bags in his closet.   
"Because I don't plan on staying long. You guys have made it clear that I'm not wanted."  
"Yea, about that," Auggie said rubbing his neck, "David can be a real jerk sometimes, but I can promise you that we didn't know he was going to do it until it was done."  
"Yet," He said turning around and looking at Auggie, "When you heard about it, you did not think to tell Peter or anyone so that I could be found."  
Auggie shook his head. "We made some mistakes. But we are sorry. We we're just playing our own deck. We didn't think about you."  
"We'll that was obvious."  
"I'm trying to apologize."  
"And I'm trying to not accept." Eric said.   
Auggie looked at the floor and then back at Eric. "What can we do to make this up to you?"   
"What?" Eric asked suprised.  
"You tell us what to do and we'll do it. We are really sorry this happened and now we want to make it up to you."  
Eric smiled at the thought of getting them to do all sorts of stupid things, but then he shook his head. "There's nothing you can do."  
Auggie nodded and then walked out of the dorm.   
"Well?" The Cliffhangers who had been waiting outside asked.   
"He says he doesn't accept the apology and we can' t do anything to make it up to him."  
Shelby groaned. "Goodbye life, hello shuns."  
"So what do we do now?" David asked.  
"You're the one who got us into this mess David, you should figure out how to get us out." Juliette said.  
"Let's just go back to our dorms, it's almost lights out anyway." Scott said. "We can talk to him again in the morning before breakfast."  
They all nodded and went there seperate ways.   
  
"You sure that this will work?" Sophie asked as they walked into Peter's office.  
"No." Peter said frustrated as he sat down in the chair behind his desk. "Because they made it quite clear they don't want him here." He sighed. "I'm not sure I want him here."  
"What?" Sophie asked shocked.  
Peter rubbed the bridge of his nose with his finger and thumb. "Sophie, the kid is an actor. He makes a living making things up and pretending to be someone else."  
"So you don't beleive that he's here sincerly. Now you sound like the cliffhangers." She said taking a seat across from him.   
Peter sighed and placed his elbows on the edge of his desk. "I beleive that what happened with his parents earlier was sincere and I beleive he needs help. I'm just not sure I can help him." He said quietly.  
"Why not?" Sophie asked with concern.  
"I'm not sure Sophie." He said quietly. "I never used to let anything about a kid effect the way I helped them, but the fact that he was here before as an actor..." Peter shook his head letting his voice trail off.  
Sophie looked at Peter for a long moment. "I don't think this has to do with Eric."   
Peter looked up from his desk shocked. "Of course it has to do with Eric."   
"No it doesn't." Sophie said walking around the desk and sitting on the edge nearer to him. "We teach the students every day to take off their masks and trust us. Now I'm asking you to do the same thing."  
"I do trust you Sophie." Peter said, but he was still confused. "Where is this coming from?"  
"You don't trust me Peter. Not when it comes to these kids. You think that I'm still learning. Don't get me wrong I still am, but I can help them too."   
"I know that, I never would have asked you..."  
"Then why during the last year or so that I've been here do you point out all the things I do wrong? With Scott it was being alone with him, with Juliette it was assuming things, with Daisy and Shelby it was allowing them to push me." She looked at him. "I understand that they were mistakes - human mistakes, but why can't you trust me enough to admit your own faults, to tell me when your wrong." She takes his arm causing him to look at her. "Let me in."  
Peter drops his head into his right hand and rubs his forehead wearily. He sits quietly for several moments breathing deeply, before saying, "I have this gut feeling that I'm going to keep letting Eric down." He said softly. "I already did once. I don't know how long it will take for me to gain his trust back." He paused for a moment, dropping his head in his hands. "I don't know what I'm doing here Soph. I didn't know what happened between Shelby and her father, I didn't know that Daisy would drink. I didn't think the Cliffhangers would treat someone like that." He looks up at her "I'm slipping Sophie. I'm losing my touch and I'm afraid I'm going to end up losing any chance to help Eric because of it." Sophie didn't say a word she just wrapped her arms around him. "Am I even helping them?" She heard the soft words whispered.  
"Yea." She answered back gently.  
Peter shook his head no and broke the hold. Reaching out and picking up the folder with the scholarship information named after his father, he says with a slight edge, "Is a scholarship enough? What is it that I'm doing with this school, Soph? I try to help the kids, but if I can't reach them, if they don't trust me, if I can't tell what's wrong -then what am I doing this for?"  
She reached out and put her hand on his arm. "It's because you do help the kids. There will never be a day in your life when you see a kid that needs help, that you won't try to help." She lifts her hands indicating to the campus and the students through the window. "This is what you do Peter. This is a big part of who you are. You help kids, and they and their families are greatful for it." Peter looked at her unconvinced. "So maybe you didn't know that Shelby's dad's visit would do more harm then good, but your here for her now. Same with Daisy. Peter you don't just try to make their lives better. You do make their lives better, by being here for them all the time - not just when they are hurting, but when they are happy as well."   
It's quiet for a moment as she let's her point sink in. She then leans over a little closer to him and states quietly, "I will never have kids Peter." Her eyes are moist as she says it, "And that makes me realize how precious each and every student that comes here is. Whether they are here for an hour or four years, they will mean something to me. And even if we can't help them, well - " Her voice changes to a wistful tone, "They still had a small amount of time here, in a place where they were safe and that they felt hope." She looks down and smiles at Peter. "To me that's worth it. That's why we do this."   
Peter stands and wraps his arms around Sophie. "Thank you." He whispers in her ear. "And I love you."   
"I love you too." Sophie says as she pulls Peter tighter to her.   
  
After several moments in the tight emotional hug, Sophie released Peter and wiped the tears from her eyes. Peter smiled at her. "Why don't you and I head home and we'll pick up some dinner on the way there from Rusty's?"  
"I'd like that." Sophie said with a slight nod. The two stood and left the office hand in hand.  
  
As they headed to Peter's car, Peter turned to Sophie and asked, "Do you think the Cliffhangers will make it?"  
"Make it how?" Sophie questioned glancing over at him.  
"I mean, do you think Auggie and Juliette will leave here together or that Scott and Shelby will find their way back to each other? If Ezra will go back to drugs when he leaves here." He pauses. "I wonder if I've taught them well enough. Most of them graduate in a few months, I'm just not sure they can make it."  
"You're saying the same thing that you said in your office a few minutes ago." Sophie said as they settled into his car and headed for town. She turned to face him, "Quit doubting yourself Peter. You do a damn fine job with these kids, don't let anyone - including yourself - convince you otherwise."  
Peter smiled with a small shake of his head. "What did I do when you weren't around?"  
"You were lost without me." Sophie joked with a slight smile, but she was suprised by the sincerity in Peter's eyes when he nodded to the comment.  
"I was Soph. I'm glad that your here now and that your staying. I'm glad that were marrying and spending the rest of our lives together." Thinking back to their earlier conversation he added, "And it doesn't matter to me that you can't have kids, because I love you."  
Sophie smiled awkwardly. No matter how many times Peter said he was ok with her not being able to have kids, she just wasn't sure that was true. The conversation lulled after that until they arrived at the resturant.  
"We both going in?" Peter asked as he started to climb from the car.  
"Yea." Sophie said, "But lets get it to go."   
Peter nodded and the two headed inside. "Hey Annie." He said as they approached the counter.  
"You guys getting food?" Annie asked.  
"Yea, to go." Peter said.  
"Hey Sophie. Peter." Curtis said as he walked back up to the counter. "Did everything work out with that boy that was missing?" He asked Sophie as Peter ordered.  
Sophie sighed. "Things are complicated, but since when aren't they at Horizon?"  
"You guys have had quite the year so far." Curtis commented. "With the suicide of that girl's father..."  
"Shelby." Sophie interrupted.  
"Shelby?" He asked.  
"Yea, that's the girl."  
"Isn't she the one that ran away after that?"  
"Yea." Sophie said. "That's Shelby for you. But she's doing much better now."  
"Good to hear." Curtis said with a smile.  
"What's good to hear?" Peter asked joining the conversation.  
"That Shelby is doing better." Curtis said. "After her father's suicide I figured she'd have a hard time."   
"She did." Peter said. "But she's doing better now."  
"That's what Sophie was telling me." Curtis said.  
"Who's that with Roger?" Curtis and Peter both turned to look in the direction that Sophie was looking when she asked the question. "Isn't that one of the doctor's that works over where Shelby has treatment?"  
"Yea." Peter said with a slight smile. Then he turned serious. "I wonder if that's why he doesn't want to be a counselor - because he's seeing someone."  
"They didn't come together." Annie said walking over with the order.  
"They didn't?" Peter asked.  
"No. Apparently they met this morning, she came in to get take out and so did he. They ran across each other and decided to have dinner."  
"Way to go Roger." Peter said looking at the two conversing across the room "What?" He asked when he turned back around and was recieving dirty looks from both woman.  
Neither said anything. "We should probably be going Peter." Sophie said.   
"Yea." Peter said picking up the food. "Bye Curtis. Thanks Annie."   
"No problem Peter." Annie said. "Bye."  
"Bye." Curtis called after them.  
"When did you offer Roger a position?" Sophie asked, suddenly feeling a little out of the loop.  
"Just this afternoon when Eric showed up. I was thinking that it might be easier to hirer on someone to do his job then to find a counselor with all the qualifications and skills that he has."  
Sophie nodded. "He does do a good job." She said as they climbed into the car. "I think he could be a real benefit to the students."   
"Only problem is," Peter said climbing in and handing the order across the seat to Sophie, "He's not sure he can do it."  
"Roger? He could do it. If that's what he wants."  
"I'm not sure it is Soph. But I only asked him today, so he has time to think about it."  
Sophie nodded as Peter started the car and they headed home.  
  
Early the next morning, Eric awoke to find the other guys gone. "Second day here and it's going to be about as great as the first." He mumbled, climbing out of bed.   
"What did you say?" David asked walking into the room from the bathroom.  
Eric threw David a dirty look and turned away. David walked over to his bed and began to go through some school papers. He then stopped and turned back to Eric. "You know what Star," David said his voice steady. "The other cliffhangers and I are going to get into a lot of trouble because of you."  
Eric turned and glared at David. For an hour after lights out the night before he had listened to David practically grovel, which Eric had enjoyed, about how sorry he was and why Eric should give them one more chance and how they would all be in a lot of trouble if Eric didn't forgive them. "You left me in the woods, remember?"   
"You hit me." David said pointing out the purplish black bruise that covered the right side of his face almost entirely.   
Eric shrugged. "I was mad."  
"And you had every right to be." David said. He knew now how wrong he had been the day before. So did the other cliffhangers. They really hadn't given Eric a chance. "But you got me back, you hit me. The other cliffhangers didn't know that I was going to do it. And no they didn't turn me in, but we all make mistakes. We are sorry that it happened." David paused and slung his back pack over his shoulders. "I guess I'm trying to say that we'd like another chance. I know we don't deserve one, but we'd like one." When Eric didn't respond, David turned and headed out. "See ya."   
Eric watched as David went thinking about everything that had happened. He then grabbed his cloths and headed to the bathroom.  
  
The Cliffhangers minus Eric sat at a table in the cafeteria eating breakfast. "Guess this is our last meal together." Juliette said looking at Auggie. "I wish we could get him to accept our apology."  
"Why because we were caught, or because we were wrong?" Daisy asked.  
"Because we screwed up." Juliette said sincerly. "We shouldn't have done that. Peter was right we didn't give him a chance."  
The others nodded.  
"You're right, you didn't." Sophie said as she and Peter walked up.  
"I see Eric isn't here." Peter asked looking around the table. "Did he not accept your apology?"  
The cliffhangers all looked at each other and David spoke up, "We went to him and apologized, but he said..."  
"That I would be running late." Eric said walking up to their table as though nothing was wrong. "Thanks for remembering David." The Cliffhangers stared at Eric in astonishment.   
"So they apologized and you guys worked things out?" Sophie asked, also surprised.  
"Yea." Eric said smiling up at Sophie. "We made an agreement - they would get me a map and I would consider myself only slightly above them." He said, but then he smiled.  
"That's really not all that funny." David said giving a mock angry face.  
"Well neither or you." Eric said with a laugh. The other Cliffhangers laughed too, although they weren't sure exactly how this had happened.  
"Looks, like David has met his match." Ezra said.  
  
Peter and Sophie walked to the other side of the cafeteria and watched the newest Cliffhanger being part of the group.   
"Why do I think that wasn't quite what the old Cliffhangers were expecting?" Sophie asked.  
"Because I think Eric decided at the last minute to give them another chance." He took a deep breath. "Maybe he'll do the same for me."  
"I'm sure he will." Sophie said with confidence.  
"There are still a lot of things we have to figure out about him." Peter said after a moment.  
"I know." Sophie said. "But they are past the hard part now. He's one of them." 


	36. Phone Calls and Conversations

Author's note: First of all I wanted to say that I'm sorry I haven't updated in so long, but you know how life can be. Anyway, I'm still working on the website and hope to have it up soon, if anyone is interested. Also, this story is one that helps to move the plot along so a lot of things begin to happen, but won't be resolved in this story. The next story is already in the works and should be out soon. Please review and let me know what you think about what's happening.   
  
(This story takes place one week before Christmas.)   
  
Phone Calls and Conversations   
  
Ring...ring.   
Megan reached over and picked up the phone. "Mount Horizon, Can I help you?"   
She waited as the other person responded. "Yes, he can take a call. The students are normally in class, but we had a heating problem this morning." A pause. "Let me find where he is and I will tell him he has a call." Megan pushed the button putting the call on hold, as she did she noticed Peter coming from his office folder in hand. "Peter." She said. "Do you know where Auggie Cicero's is? He has a call."   
"He's probably in the lodge with the other Cliffhangers. I can let him know sense I'm headed over there. Do you know who the call is from?"   
"It's a Mr. Hamilton." Megan said.  
"Oh." Peter said. He knew what this call was about. "I'll make sure to tell him." And with that Peter turned and headed for the lodge.   
  
"It's not fair." Juliette pouted as she walked over and flopped down onto the couch next to Auggie. "I finally think of a way to get through to her sense she wouldn't answer my calls and she writes me back and says I can't have the number."   
Auggie glanced over at her. "I'm really sorry Jules. I know that has to suck."  
Juliette sighed. "I just wanted to talk to my dad." She turned and looked at Auggie. "Is that so much to ask?"  
"No." Auggie said firmly. "No one should be kept from their family." He paused. "Why won't she tell you?"  
"Same old reason. She thinks I should concentrate on getting better and not worry about anything else right now."   
"I don't want to be mean here, Jules, but maybe she's right."  
"What?" Juliette cried.  
"Maybe she's right." Auggie said calmly. "Maybe she is trying to take care of you and do the right thing. Maybe she realizes that contacting your dad right now isn't what's best for you."  
"But it's what I want." Juliette said. "She never lets me have anything that I want."  
"Because you don't stand up for yourself Jules. If you did, she wouldn't be able to walk on you like she does. Stop letting her control you Jules."  
Juliette was about to reply to that, when Peter walked up. "Not to interrupt you two, but Auggie you have a phone call."  
"My parents?" Auggie asked and Peter shook his head no. "All right I'll take it upstairs. I'll be back Jules." He said as he stood and headed up to take the call. Peter watched him go and then turns to Juliette.  
"So," He asks, "How are you doing?"  
Juliette looks at him for a moment and then says, "I want to talk to my father. But mother thinks it's best if I concentrate more on trying to get better then talk to him."  
Peter nods and sits down next to her. "Maybe she's trying to look out for you."  
"That's what Auggie said." Juliette shakes her head suddenly getting angry. "But she doesn't want to look out for me. She doesn't want to protect me. She just wants to control me that's all she's ever wanted."  
Peter takes a deep breath. He knew that to be true to an extent, but he also knew that Juliette allowed some of it to happen too. "You don't have to let her. You could tell her how you feel."  
"I don't know how." Juliette said frustrated. "Every time I try I either chicken out or... I just chicken out."  
Peter thinks for a moment and then says, "I'm not sure what to tell you Juliette. But I have an assignment for you that might help."  
Juliette almost groaned aloud. "Everything leads to an assignment."   
"I think you'll like this one though and it's specifically for you and you alone. No one is allowed to know that you're doing it." Juliette looked at him curiously. "This assignment will last until I decide it needs to end." He paused for a moment making sure she was following what he said, "And what I want you to do is make your own choices. You decide when you get up; go to sleep, when and if you go to class, if you participate in group. You are allowed to do anything you want... with in reason, as long as it's your own choice."   
"But if I don't go to class I'll get in trouble."  
"Juliette I own this school and I'm telling you to do this. I'll let the other counselors know so you don't get in trouble. But you can't tell the other students."  
"But won't they want to know why if I don't go to class or if I don't participate in group? Won't they wonder why I'm not getting in trouble?"  
"Most likely, but you'll just have to tell them something. And once the assignment is over you can tell them about it - after you right a three page paper about how it made you feel to spend your time like this." With that said Peter stood. "Remember this assignment is for you alone and it starts now." He turned to walk away, but then called over his shoulder, "Remember, if anyone finds out the assignment is automatically over."   
  
"What was the call about?" Juliette asked Auggie from where she sat on the couch thinking about her assignment.   
"Oh, it was just an old friend." Auggie said as he sat down on the couch. "Wanted to know when I was coming home. I told him I'd be home in a few days."  
Juliette leaned over resting her head on Auggie's shoulder. "I'm going to miss you. It was going to be our first Christmas together."  
"I'll be back by New Year's Eve I promise."  
"I guess that will have to do." She jokes and then she becomes mores serious. She glances up at Auggie. "There's only six or seven months until you graduate Auggie and I already miss you." Auggie doesn't reply, but a sinking feeling begins to settle into his stomach. "I guess we'll just have to make the next six months as special as possible."  
"Yea." Auggie says as he puts his arm around. "The rest of our time together will be as special as possible."  
  
Peter walked over to Sophie and slipped his arms around her waist. "How about you and I go away for the weekend?"  
Sophie smiles brightly leaning into him, but then suddenly realizes where she is. She turns breaking his hold on her. "As great as that sounds, haven't you been saying that we don't have enough staff as it is?"  
"Well, I think I solved that problem."  
Sophie looks at him surprised. "You found a counselor to work?"  
"Yes. Well, as long as everything works out. But he should be able to start right after the first of the year, so we should be able to escape for a weekend."  
"What about Roger?" Sophie asks as she begins to walk around and straighten up the lodge.   
"There is still a position open for him. But this way we are better off then we were before. The guys credentials look good and I'll be able to meet him after Christmas break. Plus Kat has agreed to stay for a few extra days to so we'll have help there."  
"I thought Kat wanted to go be with her family."   
Peter shook his head slightly. "I think Christmas is always hard on her family, with Shannon's death and all. After everything over the summer and all I'm just not sure Kat wants to spend too much time dwelling on such bad times. I think she's ready to have good times. I just think that she thinks her parents aren't ready to yet."  
"Doesn't that mean she's avoiding the problem?"  
"Yes and no." Peter said. "I think she has a lot of other reasons why she's staying too."  
"Hank being number one?"   
"Yep." Peter said. "I plan on talking to her and make sure she definitely wants to stay, but if she doesn't I still think we'll be able to cover everything well enough." He paused for a moment before saying, "So will you come out of town with me?"  
Sophie took a deep breath. "I'm just not sure Peter. I mean with everything going on here - it's Christmas after all - and all the changes that the cliffhangers have faced. I think it would be a good idea for us to stay in town."  
Peter sighed and then guiltily said, "Well, I kind of have to go out of town."  
Sophie stopped what she was doing and looked at him. "Let me get this straight, you come over trying to woo me away for a weekend, and it's all about business?"   
Peter looked contritely at her. "I called Mark. He invited us for the holidays - partially so that we can discuss his funding the scholarship."  
Sophie grunted in discussed. "I don't believe you. Here I am thinking you want to spend time with me and it's really because you don't want to face your brother by yourself."  
"It's not that I don't want to spend time with you. I always want to spend time with you." He smiled at her sweetly. "And I do want you to go away for the weekend with me. And I think it's important with us being engaged that you and my brother get to know each other."  
"You barely spend time with your brother."  
"I'm trying to change that." Sophie gave him a look. "Ok, Ok. I'll admit defeat. My brother and I are still working things out and I don't want to go there and argue with him about this. I thought that if you came it would be easier. But I also thought that time away for the two of us would be a good thing too." He stepped towards her. "We're engaged Sophie." He reached out and took her hands into his. "I would like to see you with out all of this."  
Sophie smiled at him, but still gave him a hard time. "Well, after such a nice and genuine invitation, how can I say no?"  
"So you'll go?"  
"As long as everything is taken care of before we leave. I'll go."  
"Great." Peter said and he leaned over and kissed her. "I know this is the circumstances that you or I wanted, but I do want you with me." With that he turned and headed away giving her a wave.  
  
Act two:  
Inside of the girl's dorm, Shelby laid across her bunk working on homework. She looks up when she hears someone entering the room.   
"Do you have any idea what he's done now?" Daisy rambled as she walked right into the room and began to pace in front of Shelby's bed. "I was there for Thanksgiving, I forgave him, and what does he say, that he'll see me at Christmas. Well, it's Christmas and where is he? Sitting at home, telling me that I can't come home because I drank when I was there before. He just doesn't think that it's a good idea. He thinks I should wait." She looks at Shelby for a moment and takes a breath. Shelby starts to say something, but before she can, Daisy starts again. "What gives him the right to just go all parental on me. He hasn't been here for the last seventeen years why should he all of a sudden be able to make any type of parental decision. What even makes him think that he's capable? I just can't believe he's doing this." Daisy says and drops back onto her bed finally out of steam.   
Shelby tries to keep the smile from her face as she watches her friend. After a moment Daisy sits up and catches Shelby watching her amused. "What's so amusing?"  
"You are." Shelby said. "You know that you enjoy every moment of this."  
Daisy glared at Shelby for a moment, but then she suddenly smiles a small smile. "Yea, I think I do." She pauses for a moment. "But, I mean, I do wonder… well, every now and then, I get mad that he tries to take care of me. Don't get me wrong, I love the fact that we have a relationship and that he's trying. I've learned more about my dad and my life in the last month then I have in seventeen years, but every now and then, I sit back and I resent the fact that he's trying to do it."  
Shelby sat up on her bed. "I think it's natural to feel like that. I think anyone would feel the way that you do now."  
Daisy nods, and says, "But I wish I didn't. I wanted this. This is always what I wanted."   
Shelby looks down at her bunk for a moment, takes a deep breath and then says softly, "Sometimes getting what you want, isn't want you always wanted."  
Daisy looks at Shelby for a moment and then asks, "It's Scott again isn't it?"  
Shelby looks up at Daisy kind of shocked and then looks back at her hands, "Yea." She says softly. "We broke up so we could both figure out how to cope on our own. I know it's what we both needed. It's what we both still need." She takes a deep breath, her eyes showing sadness as she says, "But I miss him." A pause. "I miss you. I miss everything about how things were before. I know it wasn't simple then, but I feel like it was. I feel like I've lost so much... and I want it back."  
Daisy looks at her for a long moment and then stands and goes over and sits down next to her. "Things can't be the same forever Shelby. If things didn't change, you never would have been with Scott, you and I wouldn't be friends, I wouldn't have my father back."  
"Everything that has happened though… it wouldn't of if things hadn't changed. Like with my father, and I use that term loosely, he wouldn't be dead right now. He wouldn't have killed himself if things wouldn't have changed."   
Daisy looks at Shelby confused for a moment. "What does your father have to do with this? The fact that he committed suicide has nothing to do with you." Daisy watched as Shelby's face went pale. "You didn't kill him Shelby, you didn't. It wasn't your fault." She says firmly.  
Shelby shakes her head. "I don't think it's my fault. But if…"  
"No buts, Shelby. Nothing you could have done made this happen. If he wanted to end his life, it was his decision. Not the right one, but it was his." Daisy could tell she hadn't convinced Shelby. "Shelby he probably had been thinking about killing himself long before he showed up." She said softly.   
Shelby turned sharply to Daisy, with tears in her eyes and shook her head. "He didn't want to until he got here."  
Daisy looked at Shelby. "You mean he didn't want to kill himself when he got here?" The words were out of Daisy's mouth before she realized how bad the question sounded.  
Shelby nodded swallowing the lump in her throat.   
"I just..." Daisy paused for a moment not sure what to say to this new information. "After you left... No one really knew what happened to you. We knew your dad had committed suicide and that you had already been freaking out. Scott told me about that day in the office - when you broke down and said you didn't know what to do. He also told me that your father told him something about," She thinks for a moment, "That your dad said, "Sometimes parents do things that hurt their kids, that they didn't mean to do." We thought that that day in the office that your father told you that he had come to tell you goodbye. And that he was going to kill himself. We thought it pushed you over the edge."  
Shelby stared at Daisy. So many questions in her head and even more answers that she wasn't willing to give. She hadn't told the full story to Peter yet and she hadn't said much of anything to any of the other cliffhangers. So she hadn't realized that the others might know stuff about that day that she didn't. "My dad said something to Scott?" Shelby asked beginning to become upset. "After he left the office that day?" She asked standing up.   
Daisy could tell Shelby was really upset. "Yea... I thought you knew." She explained. "I don't know why sense you left, but I thought Scott would tell you."   
"Well he didn't." Shelby snapped angrily. "He didn't tell me anything." Shelby stands there for a moment and then turned and stormed from the dorm.   
  
Scott sits in the lodge. He sits for a moment and then he stands. Through all this he watches the phone. He tries to mentally pep talk himself into making the call but he can't work up the nerve. Next thing he knows Shelby storms up to him.   
"Why didn't you tell me that my dad talked to you?"  
"What?" Scott asks thoroughly confused.   
"That day, when I freaked out in the office - the day he killed himself - why didn't you tell me that he said something to you?"  
"I didn't think about it." Scott says frustrated, more by his current phone situation then with Shelby. "Besides you were gone for a while and the only time we've really talked sense you came back was to break up."  
Shelby started to say - to scream at him that he should have told her, but she was too hurt by his last remark to respond so instead she turned to go.   
"Wait." Scott said reaching out and touching her arm. Shelby turned but shrugged his hand off.   
Scott took a deep breath. "I'm sorry." He said. "I should have told you that your dad talked to me and I would have if I had thought about it. I was so worried about you while you were gone, that I didn't think much about what your dad said to me or why he said it. Other then in trying to figure out what happened in the office that day."   
Shelby looked at him for a moment. "I'm sorry too. I shouldn't have left like I did."  
"We've already talked about that."  
"I know." Shelby said with a heavy sigh as she sank down into a nearby chair. "I feel like I'll be apologizing for it for the rest of my life though."  
"You don't have to. You did what you thought you had to do." He paused. "You remember what you said to me in the kitchen the week after I found out about what you used to do?"  
"You mean prostitution?" She still found it odd that Scott tried never to say the word.  
"Yea." Scott said. "Do you remember?"  
Shelby shrugged and then with a half smile said. "I said a lot of things to you that week."  
Scott smiled slightly to and then looked at her. "You said, 'I did what I had to do, I'm not proud of it, but I'm not going to apologize for it either.' As long as you feel ok with the decision you made, then you don't have to apologize for it Shelby."  
Shelby looked at the wall across from her. "I'm not ok with the decision I made. Not the one to leave. But I know that I wasn't right then. Not emotionally. I'm ok with the fact that I decided to come back and I'm ok with the decisions that I've made sense then." She bit her lip as she suddenly realized that she had off handedly just said she was ok with the fact that they had broken up. And hadn't she just told Daisy that she wasn't ok with it.  
"It's ok." Scott said softly. "I'm ok with the fact that we broke up too."   
Shelby didn't say anything for a moment. The statement had hurt. Taking a deep breath she decided to take a chance. "I miss being around you... I miss the way we were before."  
Scott smiled sadly. "I do too." He reached back and began to massage the back of his neck with his hand. "But I realize that I need to not be with you right now. Just like I think you realize that you need to not be with me right now." A pause. "It doesn't mean that we don't love each other. It just means that we have other stuff to do right now."  
Shelby nodded. "I know... it still sucks though."  
"Yea," Scott said taking a deep breath, "It does."  
Shelby shifted until she was seated more towards Scott. "Maybe if we talk more with each other, instead of walking around on eggshells because we've broken up, actually try to be friends for awhile."   
Scott turned and looked at her. "You want that?"  
"Yea." Shelby said surprised. "When we broke up that's what I wanted. Why do you not want that."  
"No - I mean - yes, I do want that." He shrugged. "I just thought that when we broke up… I thought you didn't want me as a friend. Because you weren't willing to tell me anything and wanted to go off and try to figure things out on your own, I thought you didn't want me around. But, I want you as a friend."  
"And I want you around... I don't want you as a boyfriend right now... no I can't handle you as a boyfriend right now. But I want you as a friend."   
Scott smiled. "We're actually going to be friends then?"   
"Yes." Shelby said. "So - friend - what's going on in your life?"   
Scott sighed and then glanced at the phone. "I don't think I can call him."   
Shelby didn't have to ask, she knew who 'him' was. "Why do you want too?"  
"Because he's my dad... because it's been months sense we talked... because we broke up so that we could deal with things in our lives and this is one of those things."  
"What's the worst that can happen?"  
"He can say he still doesn't believe me and he can tell me I'm not his son."   
"But what if you call and he says he realized he was wrong. What if he's there right now, trying to work up the nerve to call you, but is afraid you won't forgive him?"  
Scott looked at her. "I never thought of that. I assumed he'd just give up."  
"People will surprise you - not always in good ways." Shelby said.   
Scott nodded. "I still don't think I can make the call."  
"Well then don't call." Shelby thought for a moment and then said, "Take your own advice Scott. You said that if I was ok with the decisions that I made that I didn't need to apologize for it. If you think you'll be ok with not calling your dad - then don't, but if you'll be ok if you call him, do that."  
Scott sighed. "You're beginning to sound like Sophie."  
Shelby gave Scott a look. "If you ever tell anyone that, you will suffer greatly."   
Scott smiled. "Ok... Sophie."  
"Scott Barringer." She said with warning.   
"I think I have a phone call to make." Scott said with a laugh and stood and headed away.  
Shelby shook her head and then smiled. She felt like her and Scott were finally ok with each other, not where they were when she left, but closer then they had been before this conversation and it felt good.   
  
  
Act 3:  
  
Inside the cafeteria, the cliffhangers minus Eric are sitting together eating lunch.   
"I think they should cancel the rest of our classes." David said. "It's unfair to get our hopes up by canceling morning classes and then force us to go to afternoon classes."  
"There was a heating problem." Kat said.   
"Well, it's still unfair." David said.  
"Yea." Ezra said. "We had all morning to do what we wanted and we didn't even burn the place down. Why not let us have the rest of the day off?"  
"I agree." Daisy said. "After all it is the week before Christmas."  
"True." Shelby said. " Be in the Christmas spirit and let us have the rest of the day off."  
"Why are you guys telling me this?" Kat asked. "I can't do anything for you."  
"You are part of the staff." Scott said.  
"No. I'm a college student on home for break and I volunteer to help out here."   
"Close enough." David said.   
Kat shook her head and the others went back to eating their lunch instead of talking about missing class. "I guess that's the best thing about college. They don't care if you miss class."  
"You don't have to rub it in." Auggie said and the others agreed.   
"I can't imagine you not going to class." Shelby said after a moment with a doubtful look in her eyes.  
"Yea." Scott said. "You just don't seem like the type. It would be like Juliet eating a four course meal and wanting dessert."  
Juliette threw Scott a look, but then said, "They have you on that one. It's just not you."  
"Ok. Ok." Kat says after a moment with a laugh. "I've only ever skipped one class, all I did was sleep and I apologized to the professor."  
The cliffhangers all laughed. "Knew you couldn't actually skip a class." Scott said.   
"Who's talking about skipping class?" Peter asked walking up and stopping the conversation.  
"Kat." Shelby said.   
Kat looked at Peter. "It's not even what your thinking Peter. I was talking about college." She said with a smile.   
Peter shrugged. "Your out of Horizon now. You don't need to explain it to me." He paused for a moment looking at the others, making it clear that they still needed to explain it to him. "But I do need to talk to you for a moment, if that's ok."  
"Yes." Kat said "But let me finish eating.   
"All right." Peter said. "I'll wait for you." With that he turned and headed off.  
"That's some accomplishment." David said. "Not even I'm that good."  
"What is?" Kat asked turning to David.   
"You're not even a student and you're in trouble." He finished.   
"I'm not in trouble. I no longer go to this school. He probably just wants to talk to me about my staying on for a few extra days."  
"You're staying?" Juliette asked. "I thought you were going home for the holidays."  
"I changed my mind." Kat said with a shrug. Then she stood and picked up her tray. "I should probably go talk to Peter."   
  
She walked over to the kitchen and placed her tray at the dish counter. Even though she knew she had done nothing wrong she still felt slightly anxious about speaking to Peter.   
"You wanted to talk to me?" Kat asked.  
"Yea." Peter said. "Let's take a walk."   
Kat nodded and the two of them head out of the cafeteria and begin to walk through campus.   
They had been walking for a few minutes when Peter said, "I was just wondering if the reason your staying is because you don't want to deal with your parents."  
Kat sighed. She had known he would ask. "I'd be lying if I said that that wasn't part of the reason."  
Peter stops walking and looks at her. "You can't hide forever."  
"I know." She looks at him. "But if I could just hide for this year, I'd be ok with that."  
"That's not how it works Kat and you know it." He said gently. Kat nods in agreement. "Look, I'm not your counselor, I can't tell you what to do, but I am your friend and as your friend, I'm telling you that you might want to think again about going home."  
Kat nods. "I'll think about it."   
Peter smiles. "Good. Then we're done here?" Kat nods. "I may not be your counselor Kat, but Sophie and I are still here if you want to talk. So are the others."  
"Thanks, Peter." She looks up at him. "I know your all here and I appreciate that. You've been so helpful this year with letting me help counsel. You haven't gotten on my case, but you've helped guide me and I appreciate that. So thanks."   
"Well, you're welcome." Peter said with a smile and the two turned and headed back to the cafeteria.   
  
Peter and Kat walk into the cafeteria. Seeing Roger and Sophie over in the corner talking to each other, Peter says goodbye to Kat and heads over to where Roger and Sophie are.  
"I don't know." Roger was saying. "I just can't figure him out."  
"Can't figure whom out." Peter asked walking into the conversation.  
"Eric." Sophie says.  
Peter sighs. He still feels like he screwed things up with him.  
"He showed up that day and kept the cliffhangers from getting in trouble, but he still doesn't seem to want to hang out with him." Roger said.  
"I don't think he does." Peter said with another sigh. "I also don't think he wants to talk to me. Not after I thought he ran."  
"It was easy to assume." Roger said.   
"Never assume Roger. You know that."  
"Yea." Roger said. "I do. But everyone makes mistakes."  
"I know. I'm just not sure how to fix this one."  
"You want me to talk to him for you?"  
Peter looked at Roger. "You have a soft spot for that kid?"  
Roger shrugged. "Maybe." He paused. "He seems different then the rest. Like he actually wants to be here, but he still seems like he doesn't want to deal with his problems."   
"None of them do." Sophie said. "It they did, we'd be out of a job."   
Peter and Roger both laughed.   
  
Act 4:  
  
Juliette and Auggie were walking hand and hand through the campus.   
"We should probably head back." Auggie said glancing at his watch. "Class is going to start soon."  
Juliette took a deep breath. "I don't think I'm going to go."  
"Why are you sick?"  
"No." Juliette said.  
"Then what?" He asked.  
"I just… I don't feel like going today." She said keeping her eyes down.   
"Is this about your mom's letter?"  
"No." Juliette said defiantly. "Not everything is about my mother. Sometimes I do things just for me." But even as she said it, Juliette knew it wasn't really true.   
"You're only going to get yourself in trouble Jules. She's not worth it." He squeezed her hand. "Come on lets go to class."  
"I said I wasn't going." She said pulling her hand away.  
Auggie looks at her. "Fine. Play your own deck then. But I won't lie for you and I don't want to hear about it when you end up on shuns." With that he turned and headed to class.   
Juliette sighs as she watches him go. This was harder then she thought. Now Auggie was mad at her. But hadn't Peter told her to do what she wanted to do. And it did feel good to tell Auggie that she was doing it for herself. Even though she wasn't sure that that was why she was doing it. Deciding to think on it for awhile, she turns and walks down to the docks.   
As she gets close she sees Eric sitting on the docks with his legs hanging off the edge.   
"Shouldn't you be in class?" She asks.  
"I could ask you the same thing." He says never looking back at her.   
"I have a reason."  
"So do I."   
Juliet walked over and sat down next to him.   
"I didn't say I wanted company." Juliette looked slightly hurt by this, so Eric said, "But I didn't say I didn't either."  
Juliette smiled then. "So why are you out here?" She asked after a moment.  
"Just cause." Eric said. "Wanted some time to think." A pause. "How bout you?"   
"Wanted to do what I wanted for a change."  
"A rebel." Eric said knowingly. "But you don't seem like the type."  
"I'm not." Juliette said. "Far from it. I'm the cheerleader - homecoming girl."  
"Ahh, so you always try to be everything to everyone. Especially your parents."   
Juliette looked at him surprised. "How did you know?"  
"Been there - done that - writing the screen play."   
"Is that why you ended up here?"  
"No." A pause. "Not really." It was quiet for a moment. "So," Eric asked, "Why are you here, other then the whole cracking under the pressure to be something your not?"  
"Bulimia and cutting."  
"You say that so candidly."   
"We're not exactly shy here."  
"Not exactly welcoming either." Eric said with a slight edge to his voice.   
Juliette almost flinched from the statement. She sat for several moments trying to think of what to say and then finally said, "I'm really sorry about what we did to you when you first got here."  
Eric shrugged. "It happens."  
"It shouldn't have though." Juliette said. "All of us have just been through so much, particularly in the last few months, we were just afraid of what would happen if someone new came in. And then when it was you... well it scared us even more."  
"I scare you?" He asked turning to her.   
"No, the idea of change scares us. Doesn't it you?"  
Eric shook his head. "Depends on if I think the change if for the better or the worse."   
Suddenly both Eric and Juliette turned as they heard a branch snap. "Shouldn't you guys be in class?" Eric turned from Roger and muttered something inaudible. "I'll take that as a yes." Roger said as he walked closer to where they were. Seeing that it was Juliette, he remembered Peter telling him that she was excused from classes. "Juliette why don't you head back to campus, I want to talk to Eric for a moment."  
Juliette nodded and then headed back to campus. She might be able to make her own decisions, but she still wasn't willing to tell Roger no.  
Roger stood for a moment and then sat down next to Eric taking Juliette's previous spot. "So you want to tell me why you're not in class?"  
"Finally someone who asks me instead of jumping to conclusions." Eric said with sarcasm.  
"We all make mistakes."   
"Some more then others." Eric muttered.  
Roger gave a slight nod. "I can understand why you would be mad about what happened with Peter. He judged you - unintentionally, but he did it."   
Eric sighed. He could tell that Roger was an ok guy. So far the man had done nothing to push him or make him think that he was judging him as Peter had. "That's not even what I'm mad about." Eric said after a moment. He knew that he had just made the decision to trust Roger, but it felt right.  
"What are you mad about then?" Roger asked gently.  
Eric looked at Roger. "You promise you won't say anything?"  
Roger looked at Eric, "Everything you tell me is confidential, except in the case that we find that there is harm to you then we are obligated to report it."  
Eric gave a slight nod and then looked away. "I thought this place would be different - that's what I'm mad about."  
"Different from what?" Roger asked.  
"I don't know." Eric said with frustration, "Just different. I mean home wasn't any fun and I don't have a job anymore. I thought that coming here would be different - that I could get out." He looked at Roger. "I came here last year and I know it seemed like this was the last place I wanted to be, but I took information with me. I made sure to get it to my parents. I wanted to be here."  
"Why?" Roger asked out of pure curiosity. "No kid wants to come here."  
"I did." Eric said looking at Roger. "I wanted out. I wanted to be someplace where I could relax and not have to worry about...." He stopped suddenly realizing what he was saying.  
"Not have to worry about what?" Roger asked. He knew that he probably shouldn't push. Not when he was getting so much volunteered information from the boy, but he felt he should.   
"Just.... stuff." Eric said. "Just not have to worry about stuff." After a moment, Eric stood feeling that he had said way too much. "I should probably get to class now."   
"Eric," Roger said, causing the boy to stop, "You're on kitchens for all meals tomorrow for skipping class."  
Eric sighed. "Figures." He turned to head away again, glad that Roger was allowing him to go without any more conversation.  
"Oh, and Eric," Eric once again stopped and turned. "If you want to talk, I'm always here."   
Eric nodded and then turned and headed back to campus.   
  
  
Act 5:  
"You should have seen it." Roger said as he stood talking on his cell phone to Alex, the girl he had been dating for only a short time. The two had had an instance connection starting when they had ran into each other when Roger had picked Shelby up from one of her psychiatry sessions. And even though he trusted Alex, he was careful about not telling her too much. He had to keep the confidentiality of his students, if he didn't they wouldn't trust him. "I've never had a student open up like that, not so quickly."  
"You sure it wasn't fake? He is an actor." Alex asked.  
"Alex, it feels like he's telling me the truth. He seems genuine."  
"Well, I'm proud of you." Alex said and he could hear the smile in her voice. "Does this mean your going to take the job that Peter offered you?"  
Roger had known that question was coming. He licked his lips with anticipation. "I'm thinking about it. I do well with these kids. And I think that Eric may be the one that I can help."  
Alex smiled, knowing he couldn't see her. "I think we all have one, Rog."   
  
Daisy walked over and joined Ezra on the couch. Classes had ended an hour before. "I feel like I haven't seen you all day."   
"You haven't." He answered not looking up from his homework.  
"I saw you at lunch." Daisy said wondering what was up with his mood.  
"But it wasn't just me and you time." Ezra said finally looking up at her.  
For a moment Daisy panicked. She thought that Ezra had finally understood that she didn't think of him like that.   
"Didn't mean to freak you out." Ezra said catching the look on her face. "I wanted to talk to you and you weren't around."   
"Something happen?" Daisy asked shifting so she could look at Ezra better.  
Ezra sighed. "My parents called - they want to visit."  
"Oh." Daisy said. "What are you going to do?"  
"I don't know." He said. He sighed. "Last time they were here they lied to me and then I OD because I couldn't handle it."  
"You mean because you wanted to get back at them."  
Ezra threw Daisy a look and she gave him one right back. "Fine! Because I wanted to get back at them." Daisy gave a slight nod. "But if I'm still willing to do that to try to get back at them I'm not sure they should visit."  
"Have you talked to Peter or Sophie about this?"   
Ezra threw her a look. "This is the advice that I'm getting?"  
"Would you rather me tell you that you should tell them how they make you feel, that you should stand up for yourself and that you need to forgive them?"  
"I think I would be better off talking to Peter or Sophie."   
"Just remember you asked."  
Ezra shook his head. "I think I liked you better before you and your dad worked things out."  
Daisy looked at Ezra for a moment. "What does that mean?"  
Ezra shook his head. "Nothing."   
"Come on Ezra. It's not nothing."   
Ezra shook his head again. "It's just that ever sense you came back you and I rarely talk. You're always with David or Shelby or Scott or on the phone with your dad."  
"So your mad because I forgave my father?" Daisy asked in disbelief. "I wouldn't have thought you to be like that Ezra. For once I'm finally happy and you can't stand it. I guess the old adage is true. Misery loves company." With that she stood and started to walk away.  
"Daisy I'm sorry I didn't mean that." Ezra apologized quickly. Daisy stopped and faced him. "I just miss you. I miss us being friends."  
"We're still friends." Daisy said going back over and sitting down. "I don't know why you can' t see that." A pause. "Things are changing Ez, no one can stop that. And it may take time to adjust, but we are still friends... no matter what."  
"You mean that?" Ezra asked.  
"I do." Daisy said.  
Ezra smiled and then his face turned serious. "I am sorry about what I said."   
"You're forgiven." Daisy said. "But don't let it happen again." She said with a smile. Turning she caught David coming into the room out of the corner of her eye. "I'm supposed to meet David. I'll talk to you later."  
"Yea." Ezra said, suddenly wondering if Daisy had meant a word about them remaining friends. She still ran off to be with David at the first chance she got.  
  
"Hey." Daisy said walking over to David.   
"Hey." David said, as he rocked back and forth with his hands in his pockets. "You wanted to talk before dinner."  
"Yea." Daisy said. She turned and indicated towards an area off to the corner of the lodge that was somewhat secluded. "We can go over there."   
David nodded and the two walked over and sat down. "So?" David asked. he had no idea what this was about. Maybe Daisy decided she didn't like him anymore. Wasn't she talking to Ezra when he walked in?   
"I was just wondering when the last time you talked to your dad was."  
David huffed and shook his head. "What brought this up?"  
"It's almost Christmas David. You haven't talked to him in a while and I just thought after all that we'd been talking about lately with our fathers that maybe, you might want to call him."  
"What if I don't?"  
"I'm not going to push you into it David." Daisy said. "I only thought I would ask."  
"Well you asked."  
Daisy sighed. After a moment she said, "I know I said that I would only ask, but David I think that if you call your dad things could get better. I do."   
"It's not like you to give advice." David said.  
"Well, it's not like me to forgive people either and I have been doing a lot of that."   
David sighed. "Will it get you off my back if I call?"  
"I'm not on your back. I'm just trying to help."  
"Fine. If I call, will you promise not to help anymore?"  
Daisy looked at him. She hadn't meant to offend him. She just had thought that after all their conversations lately that he might be ready to talk to his dad. "Deal." She said dully.   
David smiled and walked to a nearby phone. Daisy sat watching him as he talked for several moments. When David walked back she looked at him hopefully. "Better then I thought." He said.  
"See my giving advice isn't all that bad."   
"Just don't do it all the time." He said with a smile.   
"I'm going to head back to the dorm. I left my notes there and Eric wanted to borrow them."  
"All right." David said. "See you at dinner." He watched as she headed off, relieved that she hadn't seen him holding down the button that kept the call from ever going through. 


	37. Brothers and Sisters

Author's note: Ok people, here's the deal. I wanted to go ahead and get part of the story posted so here is the first two chapters. I also wanted to let you know that my website is up and running, it's devoted to my Higher Ground fanfic, especially this series. There are some pictures and such over there, but like this story it's still a work in progress, but please check it out and let me know what you think. Also a few reviews might inspire me to get this story up faster.   
  
http://www.angelfire.com/tv2/notanoriginal/Main.html  
  
  
Brothers and Sisters  
  
Part 1: Goodbyes  
  
Sophie sat on the couch watching Peter as he walked around packing his bags. He stopped suddenly and turned to face her, his bag in hand. "Do I have everything?"  
"You have your papers?"  
Peter nodded as he glanced at the table to make sure he had grabbed them. "Yep." He sighed. "I wish you were coming with me. It would have been a great weekend."  
Sophie stood walking over close to him. "You mean I could have helped you hide from Mark."   
"Well that too." Peter said with a smile. He looked at her for a moment. "Are you sure that you and Roger can handle everything?"  
Sophie threw him a look. "You were going to leave Roger in charge, but if I stay with him you don't think we can handle it."  
"It's one of those polite type of questions." Peter said trying to talk his way out of this. "It's like asking how people's days are even though you don't want to hear about it."  
"Oh." Sophie said with a sly smile. "So not only do you think I'm incapable of handling Horizon, but you don't listen to how my day has been. You're not making me miss you."  
Peter leaned over and kissed her and then pulled the slightest away from her. "What if I said that I love you." He kissed her again. "That I will miss you terribly this weekend." He kissed her again. "And that if everything goes right, I hope to be back early so that you and I can celebrate Christmas, belatedly, but together."  
Sophie kissed him back. "I'd say that would be the perfect end to a weekend away from you."   
Peter smiled. "Well, then I should be going so that I'll see you Sunday." Sophie nodded and the two of them walked together to the door.   
"Roger and I will take care of everything." Sophie said. "I'll see you on Sunday." She wrapped her arms around him and gave him one last long goodbye kiss.   
"Keep that up and I may never leave." Peter said as she broke the kiss.   
Sophie smiled. "Your taxi's here. Have a good weekend. And if you need me call."   
Peter nodded and headed to the taxi waving goodbye. Before he closed the door, he called out, "Love you see you on Sunday." Sophie waved then stood on the porch and watched until the car was out of sight.   
Walking back into the house she couldn't help but feel dissappointed. Kat had been supposed to stay at Horizon to counsel over Christmas, but last minute changes in her plans had meant Sophie had to stay and her weekend away with Peter had prematurely ended. "Well, those are the breaks Sophie." She said to herself. Guess I should head to Horizon, she thought to herself. Looking around one last time she made sure she hadn't forgotten anything, grabbed her keys and headed out the front door.   
  
"It's not fair." Juliette said from where she laid on her bed in the dorm room.   
"He's been gone for less then twenty four hours Jules and he'll be back in three days." Daisy said as she walked across the room carrying a hairbrush.   
"She's right." Shelby said as her and Daisy crossed paths in front of Juliette's bed. Daisy kept walking, but Shelby stopped and turned ot Juliette. "Auggie hasn't been gone that wrong. At some point in time your going to have to learn to spend time away from him."   
Juliette sat up. "If it were you and Scott - you would be laying her all depressed and upset too."   
Shelby made a face. "Princess, Scott and I haven't been together for a while now. And we have had to spend time apart before."  
"And you were both miserable." Juliette said. "I was here - I remember."  
Shelby shook her head. "If that was a crack about my running away, you better watch your back."  
"No." Juliette said quickly. "I just meant that I remember what it was like. Every time you and Scott had to be apart you were miserably. Your both still miserable sense you broke up."   
"This is none of your business Juliette. Scott and I are doing what we have to do - which is not being together right now. At lease were both mature enough to not go whining about it to everyone that we see." Shelby sighed. "Sooner or later Jules - you'll realize that what you want and what you have are two different things entirely and when you learn to live with that you'll find that you don't whine nearly as ofter." With that Shelby turned and walked away.   
Juliette sighed as she watched Shelby leave the dorm. "It's not even nine o'clock and you and Shelby are already arguing, that must be a record." Daisy said walking over.  
"I don't know what her problem is." Juliette said. "We've actually been getting along these last few months."  
Daisy sat down on the bed next to Jules. "You're a year younger then Shelby. You haven't been through nearly the same things as she has and you haven't even begun to fathom the kind of decisions that she has had to choose between in the last few months." She paused for a moment and looked Juliette right in the eyes. "She knows what she's talking about Juliette because she's been there. You need to know that you can be happy even when Auggie isn't here." With that Daisy stood, grabbed her jacket and left the dorm, leaving a confused Juliette sitting on the bed.   
  
"You sure you'll be ok going on your own?"   
Kat turned and smiled at Hank. "Yea, I think I will be." She looked at the ground for a moment and then said, "I have to go back sometime. Holidays have never been a good time, but Shannon would want us to celebrate and be happy and she'd want us to do it together." She paused. "I'm almost nineteen and in my first year of college, there will not be that many more times that I can go home and celebrate with my parents."  
Hank nodded, he remembered that feeling. "Well," he stepped closer to her. "I guess I'll see you during your next break."   
"Yea." Kat said as she stepped into the embrace that he offered. His arms wrapped around her and she felt warm, safe and loved. "I miss you so much." She said softly. "It gets harder and harder to be away from you."  
Hank nodded. "Long distance relationships are hard Kat. "But I love you and we've made it work so far."  
"I know." Kat said as she snuggled closer ot him. "I wish you were coming with me."  
"I have a job."   
"I know."   
Hank loosened his embrace and Kat stepped back so that the two could face each other. "You call me when you get there."   
"I will." She promised. She hated this part of their trip. Now she was cutting thier time even shorted because she was going home for the rest of her break. "I love you and I'll see you as soon as I can."  
Hank nodded and the two embraced one last time and exchanged a kiss.   
Kat then pulled her keys from her pocket. "I'll see you next year." She joked and Hank nodded.   
He walked her to the car and she climbed in and started the car, then closed the door. She watched him for a moment. "I love you." She mouthed one last time.  
"I love you too." He said softly and then waved as she headed away.   
  
  
Part II: Admissions and Guilt  
Shelby walked into the Administrations building. "Hey Roger." She said as she walked up to the counter. "I was wondering if I've received any phone calls."  
Roger looked up at her. "We'd notify you if you did."  
Shelby sighed. "All right." She said and then turned to leave.  
"Shelby." He waited until she turned around. "Is there anything you want to talk about?" Shelby thought for a moment and then said, "If you have a moment, I would take you up on that offer."  
"I always have a moment." Roger said as he stood and began to walk with her out of the building. "So what's on your mind?" He asked as they walked towards the main part of campus.  
Shelby took a deep breath. "You know about my little sister Jess, right?"  
"Yea." Roger said with a nod.  
"Well, I'm worried about her." Shelby said as she stopped walking and turned to him. "She's always managed to stay in school and do well, none of what happened seemed to bother her." She paused. "But that was before I ran away and before our father committed suicide."   
Roger ran his hand through his hair. "I think that would throw anybody for loop. It can't be easy for her to deal with."  
"I know." Shelby said. "But that's not the problem." She turned and they began to walk again. "She's been seeing a counselor to help her through all of this and it seems to be working for her, but she encourages her to talk to me about it."  
"And you're not ready to do that."   
Shelby shook her head. "It's not that - exactly." She stuffed her hands into her coat pockets as she walked. "I'm beginning to feel comfortable here again. And the safer I feel the more likely I am to talk about it."  
"It's good that you realize that."   
Shelby nodded. "But here, I have all these support systems and professionals. She has a counselor and my mom and only God knows what she's telling Jess."  
"So you don't think she can handle what you have to say about it?'  
"No I don't." Shelby said seriously turning to look him in the eye. Their eyes locked for a moment and Roger broke the hold first.   
'Shelby, it can take months, even years, for someone to come to grips with the terms of loss. Some people don't ever fully recover and that's just when the death is natural. Talking about it would probably help both of you." He paused. "And I realize that she will probably ask you questions that you don't know the answers to, like why did he do it, and you'll just have to tell her that we'll never know what his reasons were." Shelby threw him a look. "You know why your father committed suicide." He said slowly as realization hit him. "So your not asking how to explain the reasons, your wanting to know if telling her why will make things worse."  
Shelby nodded. "Bingo." She said. "I want to help Jess not hurt her. She's been through far too much in the last few months to have to deal with this too."  
"She's not the only one who's been through a lot."  
Shelby nodded. "I know. All of us have. Most of it's because of me though. Because I ran."  
"Consequences Shelby."  
"That's all I hear about. It was a stupid thing to do, but I did it."  
"It wasn't stupid." Roger said. "It wasn't smart either, but what was smart is that you came back and when you did you came wanting help. Having been at Horizon almost sense the start, I can tell you that you were one of the lucky ones."  
Shelby smiled slightly. "Good to know." She sighed and began to walk again. "So what do I do about Jess? Her counselor says talking about it will help her, but if she knew what I knew, who knows what would happen."  
"Shelby I don't want to pry..."  
"You're a Horizon counselor of course you want to pry." Shelby said sarcastically.  
"No." Roger said. "I want to help you." He gave her a look. "And just remember who came to me."  
"You offered."  
"Ok, you have me on that one. And I don't want to pry, but without knowing what the reason was, it's hard to give you advice."  
Shelby sighed. She had mentioned to Peter about what her father did to her. And it's not like he could do it anymore considering he was dead. She bit her lip as tears started to come to her eyes, and she swallowed hard.   
Seeing that she was getting upset, Roger decided to give her an out. "If your not comfortable talking about it with me or if your not ready, all you have to do is say so."   
Shelby shook her head. "I just... it's hard."  
"I can understand that."   
The two stood their for a few minutes in the quiet. And Shelby tried to think of a way to say it, but she couldn't get the words to come out of her mouth. It shouldn't be this hard, she thought to herself. After all she knew Roger and Peter already knew. But Roger didn't really know why she was here to begin with, or at least she didn't think he did.  
"Do you know why I'm here?"  
Roger looked at Shelby for a moment. "I know you used to run away a lot. That much is in your file."  
Shelby gave a nod. "Well, I ran away because my step father was molesting me."   
Roger looked at her for a moment, his face impassive and waited for her to continue.  
Shelby waited a moment to make sure he wasn't going to say anything and that he beleived her before she continued, "Apparently my real father did the same thing."  
Roger let out a low whistle. "Woah."   
"Yea." Shelby said.  
"Did you know that when he came or after he got here?" Roger asked. "I mean, he didn't hurt you here did he, that's not why you ran is it?"   
"No, nothing like that." Shelby said, she walked over, climbed up onto a picnic table and sat down. Roger joined her. "After my trip to the streets, I began freaking out. I was having nightmares and when he showed up on campus they intensified, until finally I thought he was every where. I saw him in everyone, in everything. And I was sitting by myself one night and I remembered what he did."  
Roger started to say something, but Shelby cut him off. "I remembered correctly. I know this because I confronted him in Peter's office that day." Shelby shuddered at the memory. "He didn't deny it. I think he even tried to apologize, but I refused to accept it." By now tears were running down her face. "I couldn't beleive it. No wonder he didn't want to help me when I went to him when I left Walt. He was afraid that I would remember. Afraid that I would accuse him and be right." She wiped her eyes. "I can't tell Jess that he did that. If he never touched her, I don't want to shatter the memory of him that she has."  
Roger smiled sympathetically. "Don't you think that she would want to know what happened though. The truth. From what I've heard and seen in the last few months, she seems like a really devoted sister and she has always stuck by you, even when your mother hasn't. If you tell her the truth, she won't be mad at you. She might be mad at him, but not you."  
Shelby looked at Roger. "I'm glad you started dating Alex. She seems to have improved your advice."  
"Yea, well, she's a good person." Roger suddenly looked at Shelby, realizing that he hadn't told anyone they were dating.   
"Sorry." Shelby said with a half smile. "But I just knew the two of you would end up together."  
"Tell me we didn't go through all of that just so you could learn that I was with Alex." Roger joked.  
"Come on Roger. I might be good, but Eric and Juliette are the two biggest actors here."  
Roger smiled. "So are you feeling better or did my advice not help?"  
"I do feel better, but I still don't know if I can tell her."  
"Well, I'd say think about it for a few days. Maybe write in a journal about the different ways you think she might react and the reasons why you do and don't want to tell her and go from there."  
Shelby sighed. "Everything leads to an assignment."  
"At Horizon, it does." Roger said with a smile. He then stood. "If you need to talk anymore, you come find me, my door is always open."  
"Thanks Roger." Shelby said as she watched him walk away.   
  
Daisy headed into the cafeteria and immediatly spotted David. "Hey Daisy." He said as she walked up to the table he was sitting at. "I saved you a seat."  
Daisy nodded her appreciation and said, "Thanks. Let me get my tray."  
"I got one for you." David said indicating the tray across form his.  
"Thanks." Daisy said with a strange look on her face. David never gets her food for her. She sat down. She was about to begin eating when she noticed that he was staring at her. "Do you have a problem?"  
"No." David said quickly. "I just... well, look at what I did with the syrup to your pancakes."  
Daisy looked down at her food and on the pancakes were the happy tragic faces. She smiled. "Ezra did that for me once, onyl he used bacon."  
"I can get bacon and change it for you if you like." David said.  
She looked at him and shook her head. "No, but what I would like is for you to explain why your acting this way. Does this have to do with that phone call to your dad?' David flinched at the mention of it. "Ever sense then you have been doing all this stuff for me, it's really beginning to creep me out."  
David scoffed. "So my doing nice things for the girl that I'm... well whatever you are to me... creeps her out. That's nice." He said and with that he stood to leave.   
"Wait." Daisy said and grabbed his arm before he could leave.  
"Let go of me." He said and pulled away from her.  
"Sorry." Daisy said removing her hand. "But I didn't mean that the way it sounded. It's just not you. You're normally so... I don't know - just not the way you have been this last week."   
David shook his head. "No I'm sorry." He put one hand on his neck and began to massage it. "It's just between the Holidays and the phone call to my dad; I'm just kind of on edge."   
"I can tell." Daisy said softly and then asked, "But I thought the phone call went well."  
David nodded, not knowing what else to do. He really liked Daisy, had sense the first day, but if he told her now that he had lied to her, she'd never give him another chance.   
"It did." David lied. "But I don't know, it's still a little odd."  
Daisy nodded. "I know what you mean. Things with me and my dad aren't great at the moment either."  
"Anything you want to talk about?" David asked suddenly concerned.  
"No, not really." She said. "I talked to Shelby about it earlier this week and I feel better about not going home for Christmas, but I still wish I could be there."   
David nodded, but he was glad that he wasn't going to be at home for the Holidays, this year his dad would have to find someone else. 


	38. Brothers and Sisters Chapter 3: Pre Grou...

Brothers and Sisters   
Chapter 3 - Pre Group  
  
Sophie walked down the hall of the admissions building heading towards Peter's office. She had just arrived at Horizon a short time ago and had been told that Roger was there.   
"I take it that this won't happen again?" Sophie overheard Roger as she approached the office.  
There was a silent moment and then a sullen answer of "No sir."   
"All right." Roger sighed. "Then your free to go."   
"Whatever."   
Sophie stopped outside the door waiting for the current occupant to leave. She was somewhat surprised to see Max, one of the Ridge Runners walking out. The boy had come a long way sense his arrival. Max didn't look at Sophie as he left. She watched him go and then walked into the office.   
"What was that about?" She asked.  
"He picked a fight."   
"Oh"  
"Yea. It's his second fight this week too, but he swears nothing is wrong."  
"Don't they all." Sophie says and she falls into the chair sideways with her legs hanging over the edge.  
Roger rolls his eyes and then looks at the laxed position that she has taken. "So now that your the boss' fiance you think you can just act any ole way you want to?"  
Sophie rolled her eyes back. It was a running joke between them that she got special privileges because her and Peter were engaged.  
"No." She said. "I get special privileges because" She looks over her shoulder to make sure no one is coming down the hallway or within hearing distance, "I live with him." She practically stage whispers.  
"Why are we whispering?" Roger whispers back. "They all know anyhow. Same way they know about me and Alex."  
Sophie grinned and then returning to her normal voice said, "Shelby figured it out did she?"  
"Yea," He groaned. "We were talking this morning and I let it slip... really she set me up."  
Sophie nodded. "You should know better then to try to keep something from her, she will always find out."  
"One day I will find a way." He said with absolute determination and then he and Sophie both laughed.   
They sobered up when there was a knock at the door.   
"Hi Lindsay, you need something?" He asked gently looking up at the young girl.  
"I was just wondering if you had a moment. I can come back later. It's no bid deal." She said in a rush and then turned to leave.  
"Whoa, wait up Lindsay." Roger called causing the girl to turn around. He could see her face was flushed. The girl was almost painfully shy, not to mention extremely insecure. Her coming to talk was a good thing.   
"I have group in a few minutes I have to be going." Sophie said standing up. Turning to Lindsay she said,. "So your not interrupting at all." She knew that Roger worked quite a bit with the Ridge Runners and was possibly going to be one of their new counselors. She walked out of the room, giving the girl an encouraging smile as she went. Lindsay smiled shyly back and entered the office cautiously.  
  
Peter for the billionth time I do not know why you have given me this assignment.  
Juliette looked up from where she sat on her bed writing in her journal. So far she could not figure out what the point of her current assignment was.   
It's great not having to go to things though.   
Juliette looked up as she heard the door to the cabin. Shelby came in followed by Daisy.   
"Did you miss breakfast Juliette?" Daisy asked stopping in front of Juliette's bed. Shelby walked on to her own bed and was gathering her stuff for group.  
"I ate earlier." Juliette said covering her journal so no one could read it.   
Shelby turned and caught Daisy's eyes. "You weren't in the cafeteria." Shelby said.  
"I went before you two woke up." Juliette answered not looking up. She hated people questioning her eating habits.  
"They don't serve breakfast that early Jules." Daisy said softly.  
"I had special permission." The two looked at her skeptically, so she added, "I was hungry."   
"Whatever." Shelby said and her and Daisy went about gathering their things.   
  
Turning back to her journal, Juliette continued on.  
I don't know why people always question me about something. Everyone always wants to know what I ate. If I didn't eat, How much I ate. When I ate. If I did this, if I did that. Why can't they mind their own business? Even you Peter. Your reading this. Why do you care? What does it matter what I do?   
Never mind, I already know the answer to that. But I wish that people didn't try so hard. I wish I didn't try so hard to please people. Maybe that's what bothers me. That they ask me. Because I feel like I'm not living up to them.   
  
"You want to walk with us to group?" Daisy asked as she and Shelby headed towards the door.  
"I'm not going." Juliette said not looking up.  
Shelby looked to Daisy, but Daisy's eyes seemed to say, Hey I've already tried once today.  
Shelby gave a slight nod and stepped towards Juliette's bed. "Jules, no one is mad at you or anything. So maybe you missed a meal, it's no big deal. Just make it up at lunch." Juliette didn't respond. " Or you could sit here and sulk." She said with sarcasm.  
"I am not sulking." Juliette snapped.  
"Your not eating either." Daisy chimed in.  
"I told you, I ate earlier."  
"Yea, yea. You had special permission." Shelby said. "You also have permission to miss group and class and anything else you want." She walked over and knelt beside Juliette's bed until the two were eye level. "Tell me Princess, what exactly do you have on the counselors that your managing to get all this slack from them lately. Not even Kat could get away with what you have."   
"I've been making progress." Juliette said, but even to herself it sounded false.   
"Right." Shelby said in disbelief as she stood up. "Because in the last few months, you've been through so many life changing events that you've discovered who you are and now you can go home with a seal that says your well right?"  
"I didn't say that." Juliette protested.  
"You didn't do that either." Shelby snapped and turned and walked out the door. "You've got a long way to go Princess."   
Juliette watched as they disappeared around the corner.   
  
David grabbed his notebook and put it in his book bag before zipping it up. He then threw it over his shoulders and headed for the door. As a last thought, he turned around and walked over to the huddled mass in the bed.   
"Eric." He said. "ERIC." HE said louder. "HEY ERIC!" He shouted finally waking the actor.   
"MMhh." Came the response.  
"Eric, we have group. You've already missed breakfast so you might want to get up."  
"Tell Sophie I'm sick." Came a mumbled reply followed by a sharp cough.  
"Is he still in bed?" Ezra asked coming into the room.  
"He says he's sick."  
"I am sick." Came a defiant protest, that would have been more effective if it hadn't been followed by another sharp cough and some sneezing.  
"That sounds bad." Ezra said.   
"It feels bad too." Eric mumbled and again sneezed.  
"But you are an actor, you could be faking." Ezra thought allowed.  
"He's not that good." David said with a small smile.   
Eric through a look at David. "I'm actually sick." He couched again, his entire chest burning with pain. "Never mind, what's the use. Send Sophie or someone to check on me if you don't believe me." He rolled away from them and went into another coughing fit.   
"We'll tell Sophie." Ezra said feeling slightly bad for doubting Eric. The kid had gotten a bad break sense he had gotten there.   
"Yea, and if your lying, it's your funeral." David said. With that Ezra and David headed for group, the sound of coughing following them. 


	39. Brothers and Sisters Chapter 4

Chapter 4: How does that make you feel? Sophie walked into the lobby by the cafeteria. Looking around she spotted what she was looking for. Walking across the room, she picked up the small wooden podium and carried it over to in front of the fire place. She then began moving chairs over to give the Cliffhangers enough room to sit down. "Hey Sophie." Sophie turned from where she was fixing pillows on the couch and saw Roger walking over. "Hey Roger." She waited until he stopped next to her and then said, "How is Lindsay?" Roger sighed. "Well, she seems ok, but she gave me a whole new perspective on the issue with Max." "Oh really?" Sophie asked curious. "Yea. He apparently got a letter from his mother recently. Seems his dad will be getting out soon." Sophie winced. "No wonder he's upset. He knows he can't get sent back though right?" "I don't know." He said shaking his head. "Kid's been through so much. I'm going to try to talk to him later. I figured after the lecture this morning for the fight, he might not be to fond of speaking with me." "I can understand that." "Sophie, Eric won't be coming today." Sophie and Roger turned to see Ezra standing next to them and the other Cliffhangers already sitting down. Minus Eric. "Why isn't Eric coming, Ezra?" "He says he's sick." "Yea," David said from where he sat, "But we warned Star that if he was faking he'd be in big trouble. He didn't seem phased." Sophie turned and looked at Roger, "I hate to postpone group, do you think you can go check on him?" "Sure." Roger said quickly. It was well known among the counselors and staff that Roger had a soft spot for the kid. It was actually part of the reason that Sophie was thinking Roger would propably accept the offer of becoming a counselor from Peter. "I can take care of that." And then he turned and began to leave. "Hey Roger let me know how things turn out with the Ridge Runners later ok?" "Sure thing." Roger said and then continued on. "OK guys let's get started." Sophie said turning back to the group.  
  
Roger walked into the boys dorm and knocked slightly on the wall. "Eric? Eric you in here." Hearing loud couching that sounded painful, he took it as a yes and walked on into the dorm. "You don't sound well." He said walking over closer to the boys bed. As Eric finished coughing he looked up with glazed eyes, "Yes well, if you could feel it you would realize that is the least of my problems." "Ooh." Roger said wincing. He could tell the boy was sick. No actor, no matter how good, could pull off the fever induced look that was on Eric's face. "So why are you here?" Eric asked couching again. "Come to catch up on me." "Well yes." Roger said honestly. "Besides sense your sick, we can't leave you in the normal dorms, so I'm going to escort you over to the infirmary." "Great." Eric said rolling his eyes. He pushed back the covers revealing the sweat pants and t shirt that he was wearing and then started to stand up. Before he could make it all the way to his feet, he began to cough harshly. Roger reached out and clasp the boys arm firmly to keep him from falling. Eric's head turned sharply and the panicked look in his eyes, caused Roger to let go of him. Eric stumbled back onto the bed and Roger knelt down in front of him, placing a hand on his back, he began to make a circling motion to calm the boy down. After the coughing stopped, Roger moved his hand from the boy's back to rest on the boys shoulder. "You ok?" "Yea." Eric said awkwardly. He wasn't used to someone bestowing caring gestures towards him. "We should head to the infirmary." Roger nodded, helped the boy to his feet. On their way out, Roger grabbed a coat and draped it around the boys back and then the two headed to the infirmary.  
  
"OK you guys. Now that we are done with that, we are going to end group with an oldie, but a goodie." Sophie said as she paced in front of the group. "The one word game - and to continue with our theme," She said turning to face them, "You are to say how you feel. OK?" There was various responses of eye's rolling and groans, but the group stood up to take part in the game. Sophie picked up the staff from next to the fire place and tossed it to Scott. "Undecided." He said and passed the staff to Ezra. Ezra looks at Daisy and then his eyes go to David. "Dejected." He then tosses the rod to David. "Guilty." He then tosses the staff to Daisy. Daisy looks at Ezra. She caught his glance between her and David and then she looks at David who has been acting weird for a few days and was now feeling guilty. "Confused." She said with a twisted look on her face. She then tossed the staff to the only person left. "Torn." Shelby answered and then handed the staff back to Sophie. Sophie nodded and then placed the staff back next to the fireplace. Reaching down into a cardboard box that was always there, she pulled out several notebooks. She heard groaning behind her and had to hide her smile before turning back around. "I know this isn't one of your favorite assignment you guys,, but this is one of the most effective methods we have here." She said as she handed out a journal to each of them. "The assignment is to write as much as you can on the one word that you've just spoken. "I don't beleive I said a word just now, I think it's considered an utterance or a groan." Daisy quipped. Sophie gave her a look and Daisy looked away. "As I was saying, you write on what you've just spoken. On that one word only, as much as you can and as honestly as you can. Write freely and openly. You are not to talk to anyone else about what you are writing and you have until tomorrow's group to finish the assignment. You are officially dismissed." With that Sophie headed over to the doorway where one of the other staff had beckoned her a few moments earlier. "Well, this should be a fun assignment." David said sarcastically. "It could be worse." Ezra stated. "At least we don't have to talk to anyone else about it."  
  
"Not true Ez." Daisy said. "She said we shouldn't talk about it with each other, not that we wouldn't have to talk about it at sometime. Like tomorrow." "Well I'm going to head to class." Scott said picking up his books. "Can I walk with you?" Shelby asked. Scott nodded and the two headed off together. "Are they back to being friends?" Ezra asked. "Seems that way." David answered. "Things are definetly better between them." Daisy observed and the three began to head to class together. "How about between you two?" Ezra asked. "Better." Daisy answered and then changed the subject to history. 


	40. Brothers and Sisters Chapter 5: Awkwardn...

Chapter 5: Akwardness  
  
"Well, I guess I should show you around the place." Mark said from where he sat at the other side of the kitchen table. Peter and his brother had sat down to have some coffee and catch up, once Peter had arrived, but so far their conversations hadn't clicked. "Um, yea." Peter said standing up. "It would be good to know where I'll be staying while I'm here." "Good idea." Mark said and joined his brother. Walking from the kitchen they headed down the hallway with Mark pointing out various points of reference to his brother. "My home office is in this room and down that way is the second bathroom." "Kind of big for one person don't you think?" Peter asked as the two walked around. "What can I say - I like space." Mark said and the two continued on. "Well it is a nice place Mark." Peter said seriously. Mark turned his head towards Peter. "You think it's too big don't you?" "I didn't say that." Peter said quickly. "But you are only one person." "I have business associates that come into town. It's better for them to stay with someone in the company then to stay in a hotel. Dad always did it this way." Both stopped moving momentarily thinking of their father. "I didn't mean that..." "It's ok." Peter said trailing off. He cleared his throat. "Dad did want it this way." Pausing for a moment as they continued on, Peter decided to take the opportunity to bring up part of why he was here. "Mark, I want you to know that I didn't just come to visit to see you." "Oh, really? Why else did you come? Are you and Sophie having problems? She's not pregnant is she." Peter felt like he'd ben punched in the stomach. "No no, nothing like that." He said quickly. Sophie had told him last year that she wouldn't be able to have kids and while Peter still loved her, he couldn't help but be a bit dissappointed that no little Peter and Sophie's would be running around. "Actually it's Horizon." Mark turned as if interested in what Peter was about to say, but suddenly his phone rang. "I have to get that." Peter said quickly. "Your room is down the hall on the right. Just make yourself at home." He said hurrying off. "We'll talk later." "Yea." Peter said dissappointed as he watched Mark go. "Later."  
  
Kat rang the doorbell, her luggage in hand. A wreath was on the front door and lights were in the bushes and surrounding the house making her feel better about this trip. If Christmas decorations were already up some, then her parents wouldn't spend the whole time being depressed about Shannon. "Katie!" Her mom squealed opening the door and immediatly pulling the college student into a hug. "Oh honey it's so good to see you. I'm so glad you came home for Christmas." "Me too kid." Her dad said from where he stood behind the two hugging women. "Why don't I take your bags?" Kat all too happily handed them over and then followed her parents into the house. Glancing around the Christmas tree she noticed that on the inside their was no sign of Christmas and a small frown crossed her face. "Don't worry honey, were going to have Christmas. We just thought you'd want to be here to help us decorate so we could do it as a family, like we used to." "Oh, well," Kat wasn't sure what to say. Like they used to? When Shannon was around. "Well that's great." She said deciding not to jump the guns before she was barely even in the door. "Maybe after dinner then?" Her parents exchanged a look and then her mother gave a slight nod. "If you'd like sweetheart." "I think I'll go get a drink." Kat said starting to head towards the kitchen. "I'll get it Kat." Her dad said and stood heading towards the kitchen. "What would you like?" "Soda." Kat answered. "Here let me take your coat." Her mother said after her father left the room. Kat nodded feeling strangely out of place, but gave her mother the coat anyway. It was awkward for everyone this year. They were doing Christmas without Shannon and she wasn't living at home and she was finally out of Horizon so things were different now. Her father came back with a drink for her and the three sat and talked about college and jobs for awhile. Two hours later, dinner completed, the three found themselves knee deep in Christmas ornaments. "I don't think these lights work." Her mother said from where she sat in the corner on the floor. "That's ok." Her dad said. "If we don't find any that work, we'll just go buy more." "How long has it been sense you've been in this stuff?" Kat asked as she wiped dust off of a box and started to open it. "It was before... " A sad look crossed the older woman's face. "It was before you went to Horizon." "Oh." Kat said softly. "So you haven't put up anything for Christmas sense...?" "We didn't see a reason to." Her dad cut in. Seeing the hurt look on Kat's face he cut in, "It's just that you were away." Kat started to speak, but her mother suddenly stood, "You know I'm feeling a bit tired. I think we'll just finish up in the morning." With that she hurried out of the room. "I should go check on her." Her father said and followed her mom out of the room. Kat looked around at the scattered ornaments and boxes that sorrounded her. "Well, this is going to be a nice Christmas." 


	41. Brothers and Sisters Chapter 6 8: Group...

Chapter 6  
  
Juliette woke to the sound of the others getting dressed and ready for breakfast the next morning. She felt good. She wasn't sure why, but the sunlight was streaming in the window and she was actually hungry. Hungry - a feeling that only within the last few months was she beginning to identify. Deciding to go to breakfast she stood and headed towards the bathroom passing Daisy on the way there.  
"Actually headed to breakfast this morning?" she asked.  
"Yea," Juliette said with a sincere smile. "I'm hungry."  
Daisy looked taken aback for a moment. "Good for you Jules." She said and then went on. "You want Shelby and I to wait on you?"  
"No," Juliette said stopping and taking some cloths and things from her cubby, "I'm going to take a nice long shower."  
"Alright. We'll see you at breakfast."  
  
Juliette picked up her tray and headed over to join the cliffhangers at their usual table.  
"So did you guys finish your assignment?" Scott asked.  
"What's the assignment?" Juliette asked wanting to be on what was going on.  
"It's this journaling thing." Ezra said. "It was assigned yesterday in group, when you weren't there."  
"Why weren't you there?" David asked raising his eyebrows. "Auggie's not around... maybe it's when the cat's away the mouse will play?"  
Shelby through David a dirty look as did everyone else at the table, but she spoke up, "David, Juliette isn't stupid enough to cheat on Auggie, not to mention that Princess doesn't have it in her."  
"So why weren't you at group?" Scott asked, wanting to know. Even with everything else goin on around him, he had noticed Juliette absence lately.  
"Well, um..." Juliette wasn't sure what to say, finally deciding on a semblance of truth she answered, "I didn't feel like going."  
"How did that go over with Roger and Sophie?" Scott asked knowing that not wanting to go wasn't a good enough reason.  
"Don't you know Scott?" Shelby asked, "Juliette's blackmailing them." Scott looked at Shelby in disbelief. "There is no other way that she could get away with all she's missed lately, yet she keeps doing it."  
"I just...." Juliette didn't know what to say. "I'm not blackmailing them." She defended. "I just didn't want to go." Seeing that they are about to ask her more questiongs she stands, "I should really get back to the dorms, i have something to be working on." With that she made a quick exit.  
  
"Maybe it's because Auggie's not in town?" Ezra suggested as they watched her go.  
"Doubt that Ez," Daisy said, "Peter has never really approved of dating here, let alone love sick isolation. "  
  
Juliette was headed back to the dorm when she realized that she didn't want to go there and be alone. She wanted to hang out with the others, but the more she tried the more they wanted to know why she wasn't around during everything. Sighing she stops and sits down on a bench by the gazebo.  
"Feeling ok Juliette?"  
She looked up and saw Roger standing above her. "Hey Roger."  
"You feeling ok?" He asked again taking a seat next to her.  
"Yes. I'm fine." She said not looking at him. Then deciding that she didn't want to keep how she felt to herself she turned to Roger, "No, I'm not fine, it's this stupid assignment that Peter gave me. Every time I try to hang out with the other cliffhangers after doing what I want, they try to force me to tell them why I'm not there. I've been evasive and all, but I don't like lying to them and Peter said I wasn't allowed to tell them about the assignment or it would end and I don't want that." She finished and then took a breath.  
Roger took thought for amoment before speaking, "Why is it so important to you that this assignment not end? Maybe you should just tell them and go back to doing things by the rules."  
"I'm not breaking any rules." Juliette said exasperated. "I'm just doing what I want... and I don't get to do what I want, not ever." For once she wasn't whining. "Everyone always expects me to do something, Juliette you need to lose weight, Juliette you need to be prettier, Juliette you need to attend class, Juliette quit acting like a princess, Juliette don't call your father." she swallowed hard, "For once, I just enjoy doing what I want to for a change. Even if the choice is only as much as going to group or not going to group. I get so sick of doing things for other people."  
"Then why do you do it?" Roger asked. He could tell this was a new thing for Juliette. Declaring that she did what others wanted and not what she wanted. Maybe Peter's assignment would work out even better then they had all thought.  
"Because if I didn't others would be mad at me." She looked down at her hands in her lap. "My mother would yell at me for not being who she wanted me to be. She'd force me to my room and not let me stay at the parties and events unless I did what she wanted. Even now, she's holding my father over my head, by not letting me contact him. I just want to make her happy, but nothing I do does that." She looked over at Roger, tears in her eyes, "Why am I not good enough for her?"  
It was a long moment, before Roger responded, "Juliette, you are good enough for her. Your mother's expectations are far to high, no one could live up to them. It's not fair of her... it's abusive to you, for her to expect those things of you and to demand that you do something you are not physically capable of. Juliette you were never meant to be under a hundred pounds, not at your height. You were never meant to be perfect or to have the best grades. Normal, reasonable expectations are that you do the best that you can and you work hard, and that's it. Anything above that, is far to great of a demand."  
Juliette huffed in disbelief. "So I'm good enough and she's just demanding?"  
"Yea." Roger answered so simply that she was taken aback and was almost convinced. Roger seeing the connection about to be made said, "She is the one wrong here Juliette. Not you. She's too demanding."  
Juliette shook her head slightly. No, it was easier to beleive that she wasn't good enough. Because if not, then her mother just couldn't love her the way she was. It had to be her fault.  
"Why don't you journal on it?" Roger said. "And I'll check back on you later today?"  
"Everyone tells me to do that." She said with a slight smile.  
"Well don't do it because I tell you to, do it because you want to." Roger said standing up. "I'll see you later. If you need me don't hesitate to ask, alright?" Juliette nodded and watched him walk away.  
Do it because she wanted to? That's what he had said. Like she was going to journal just because she wanted to. Not that it had been such a bad thing. She'd really enjoyed it the last few days, especially sense the others weren't really around because she didn't have to go to class. So what was the point of this assignment, Peter, she asked herself. Standing up, she wasn't at all sure.  
  
"Ok guys," Sophie said standing in front of the group. It was shortly after breakfast and they were having group. "Juliette isn't coming today and Eric's still sick, so why don't we get started. Yesterday I had you all say how you felt and journal on it, not I want to tell me how you feel after journaling and if it made any difference in how you felt. We'll start with Scott."  
"Well, um," Scott couldn't believe she'd picked him to go first he hated doing this, not that it was so bad, it was just hard. "Well, um, I yesterday felt Undecided, cause I can't decide if I want to give my dad another chance or not. I journaled on it, but I still don't know. He was such a jerk about the whole thing and I called him and it went ok, but it doesn't necessarily change anything."  
Sophie nodded, "Shelby?"  
"Torn." She said glancing sideways at Scott, they were both experience sort of the same thing. "I'm trying to decide if I should tell my sister more about what happened with our dad. She's in counseling and the counselor thinks it's good for her to talk to me about the suicide, but I just... I don't know. There are things she doesn't know and they could hurt her. She's my younger sister I want to protect her."  
Sophie looked to David who turned away. "David." She said with slight warning in her voice.  
David groaned inwardly, he knew he would get in trouble if he was smart about it, sense when had that mattered though, maybe sense he hooked up with Daisy. When had they hooked up though? He couldn't go back to being such a jerk though, if he did, he's really hate him, not that she wasn't going to hate him anyway, after finding out he lied to her. He looked at Daisy, who looked at him confused. "I felt guilty. And journaling didn't help. I still feel guilty." He said dropping his head to look at his feet.  
"Dejected." Ezra said volunteering, before Sophie got to him. "And it didn't help me either. "  
"Daisy?" Sophie asked letting the two boys slide on their responses.  
"I was confused and I'm still confused, but journaling did help me to sort out my thoughts."  
Sophie nodded. "Ok. Do you guys want to talk about these things? I know some of you want to deal with them one on one with Peter or I and that's ok, but you guys are a group and some of you may be able to offer advice to each other."  
"Well," Daisy said after a moment, feeling kind of bad for Sophie with the guys short responses, "I think sometimes it can be good to give people a second chance. Yes people screw up and do horrible things, but that doesn't mean forgiveness can't be given."  
"Even if the person hurts you really badly?" Scott asked.  
"Well, my dad hurt me really badly and I forgave him." Daisy said. "But he didn't do some of the things that happened to you... it would be different for me, to try to forgive him... if he had done something sexual."  
"My dad didn't do anything sexual... I mean in a way he did... he overlooked it going on... that's pretty bad, but he wasn't there for me.... I think that hurts more. He overlooked what happened, it's like he didn't care. I'm his only son, I thought I meant more to him then that."  
"My mom did the same thing Scott." Shelby said. "When I went home last year, she said it didn't happen, I walked into her room one night after finding out that he'd been raping Jess too and I spoke to her."  
Memories assaulted Shelby's mind. 'He left this bed, every night, every night. he came to my room, to Jess' room. You knew... you had to know'.  
"And so I told her, about how she'd have had to know that he was leaving her bed every night and coming into our rooms and doing that to us. And she said I was a liar and that she told the social worker that I was a liar - she asked when i was going to quit hiding from my problems." She shook her head. "Later after the cops showed up when they threatened to take Jess and I out of the home, she admitted that she knew. I said, 'I thought you said you didn't know' her response was 'I didn't want to know'." Shleby looked at Scott. "They don't want to know. Your father doesn't want to know because it means he let you down, it means his wife betrayed him."  
"So it's ok for him to betray me?" Scott asked angrily.  
"No!" Shelby said. "But... he was hurt to. It doesn't make it right. It doesn't make it right what Walt did to me or what my father did to me, but.... things happen Scott and it's wrong, but when he is willing to admit this happened to him...." She stopped trying to think of another way to explain it. "Scott do you remember what it was like when nobody knew? Do you know how hard it was to carry that around? Do you remember the only thing worse then being found out was the feeling that if it was admitted then it meant it had actually happened and that someone had done this to you and then that people would say it was your fault?" Scott nodded. "Your dad feels that way right now... only in his case, he's partially responsible for it. No he didn't take part in the act, but he did let it happen and he can't live with that, so it's easier, though cowardly to make it more your fault then his."  
Scott shook his head slightly still not wanting to let his dad off the hook. "I guess."  
"He feels guilty Scott." Daisy said.  
"And he should." Scott shot back.  
"Yea," David said joining the conversation. "Cause he did something stupid."  
"You guys, guilt will make people do crazy things. No one wants to admit something that they are ashamed of. All of you, everyone, tries to avoid being seen as weak, insuffiecient, incompatant, dumb, imperfect. We all want to be seen as capable put together people and admitting the things in our lives, the things that make us seem less then perfect - even if they aren't are fault - it hurts us and scares us." Sophie paused for a moment. "But you guys don't have to worry. Because why sometimes we all do things we regret that hurt other people, forgiveness and second chances do exist."  
"Forgive others as you yourself have been forgiven." Daisy quoted.  
"Forgiving people won't take away what they did to you, but it does open you up to no longer hating them and to not feel guilty about the way that you treat them. How hard is it to be mad at someone? How hard is it to not know how to treat them? Forgive them and let yourself off the hook, it does make life easier."  
She paused letting her words sink into the group. Glancing at her watch she said, "We're going to end a few minutes early. If anyone needs to talk just come find me or one of the other counslors, we'll be around, ok?"  
  
The group nodded and Sophie dismissed them.  
  
Chapter 7: At Home  
  
Peter sat down across from his brother. The two had decided to have lunch together. They hadn't talked much the night before after Mark got off the phone, but Peter had managed to catch him at breakfast and told him they should have lunch together.  
"Ok, Peter," Mark said, "I can tell that there is more to this trip then what your telling me. I know you and I'm glad you came to visit, I know you wanted to, but there is an ulterior motive in there somewhere and I want to know what it is."  
Peter looked up suprised. "What are you talking about?"  
"I'm talking about the real reason that you came here Peter. I get paid to work with Peter that are wanting something from me and you do. I can tell. I'm gifted like that."  
"Ok fine," Peter said sitting back in his chair, "I do want something from you. I was hoping it wasn't so obvious. I also came to see you to Mark. I don't want you to think I only showed to ask you for something." "I know Peter." Mark said sincerly. "So what is it?" "Well, a few months ago before all the hecticness with my students started, I decided I wanted to do something to honor dad. The money from his death bought back the school and because of some investments you helped me with, we were able to put the left over money to good use and make a profit." Mark smiled. "Now what I would like, is if you would, as the owner of dad's company decide to donate to the school. I want to start a scholarship program in dad's name. I'll use some of the money that we made on investments and are still making on investments, but I was hoping the business would back us and that you would join me in doing this for our father." Peter looked at his brother intently not at all sure what the man's response was going to be. "I don't know Peter. I mean the company is in a decent place right now, but we've been taking some risky investments lately, I'm not sure I want to push more of our money into investments." Peter was slightly taken aback. "But you can right it off in taxes later. I'm sure that donating would look good to the community as well." "Look Peter, I don't want to donate to the school. I've told you that before." "You won't even take it to the board?" "No, Peter, I won't. Horizon is your school. I've helped you make investments and I'll continue to do so, but my company and I will not donate to your cause." Mark stood and started to walk away. Peter stood up and went after him. "Why do I think this has more to do with the cause then the donation?" "I don't know what your talking about." Mark said coldly. Peter shook his head in disbelief. "You don't want to do this because it's for dad. Why don't you want to honor him? Don't you want to help create more of a legacy for him?" "I do that by running his business." Mark said. "No you don't." Peter responded. "Everyone at that company knows you pulled it back together not dad, so they consider it more your company. Sure most outsiders don't know but it's not the same. Come on Mark, this is a way to put dad's name on something good and profitable to the community. Share this with me." He pleaded. "No." Mark said and stepped past Peter. "Why not?" Mark turned on Peter. "Why not? Why not? Because Dad always loved you best, that's why. Do you really think that I want to do something to honor the man that always asked me to do more then he ever expected of you? He may have been our father Peter, but it doesn't mean I have to do something great to remember him." With that Mark walked away, leaving Peter wondering what to do.  
  
Kat walked into the kitchen carrying her lunch dishes. Her parents were out and about somewhere and she had been hungry so she'd made herself lunch, watched some tv and now was going to clean up a bit. "You don't have to do that Kat." Her mother said walking in through the back door. She hurried over to her daughter and took the dishes from her and took them to the sink. Kat stared at her mother. "Mom, I can wash a few dishes, especially sense I'm the one who ate." "But we don't want you working why your here Katie." Her dad said entering the kitchen and closing the door behind him. Kat nodded not sure what to say. Finally she settled on, "Great. So do you guys want to watch a movie or something? Maybe we could decorate the tree some more or make cookies." Her mother and father exchanged a look. "Kat we normally do christmas simple." "Simple is having a tree." Kat said firmly. "And baking a few cookies. That is simple." Her parents exhanged another look and then her mother sighed and put on a smile. "Ok then, lets bake some cookies."  
  
Kat nodded and went to the cubbard pulling out some aprons and handing one to her mom. "Dad, why don't you set up the base of the tree and we'll decorate it while the cookies are baking and then we can watch White Christmas like we always did." Her father nodded, swallowed hard and walked into the living room. Kat could tell she was making her parents sad by doing this Christmas stuff, but she wasn't going to let them ruin her Christmas with their grief. They needed to move on. They needed to have Christmas.  
  
Chapter 8: Conflict Heading for an End  
  
Spotting the somewhat tall brown haired boy, Daisy walked across the lounge and sat down across from David. "How are you doing?" David looked up suprised. "Hey Daisy." He said slightly nervously and gathering his bokos in his lap. "I was just headed to my dorm. I'm kind of tired. I wanted a nap." He started to stand, but Daisy blocked his path. "David is something wrong? You haven't been acting like yourself lately." "I'm fine." "You said during group you felt guilty, maybe that's why your acting like this." David laughed nervously. "Guilty me... what would I have to be guilty about... I mean I didn't do anything." "David, come on you can talk to me... is this about calling your dad... did he make you feel guilty about something?" David had had enough. "You know what Daisy, this isn's any of your business. It doesn't matter why I feel guilty or what my dad says to me... I don't need you getting into my business." With that he pushed past Daisy and left.  
  
"You ok?" Ezra asked. He'd seen David and her exchange words and though feeling dejected, he was still her friend and he did care about her. "I don't know. Something is wrong with David." "Oh." Ezra said feeling like he'd been punched everything was about David. An idea sparked in Ezra's mind then. If everything was about David, then maybe all he needed to do was get closer to David to get closer to Daisy. But that would mean getting closer to David. Looking at the girl in front of him, he decided it was worth it. "Hey, how about I ask him for you? I mean I'll talk to him and see if I can find out what's wrong. Sometimes it's easier for guys to talk with guys." "You'd do that?" "Yea." "Why? I thought you didn't like David?" "He's growing on me. Besides I decided to turn over a new leaf." "Thank you Ezra. I really appreciate this." With that she smiles at him and then turns and heads away. Ezra smiles and watches her go. Score one for Friedkin, he thought to himself. I better go find David.  
  
Kat stood across from her mom. The two were mixing up their third batch of cookies and her mom still hadn't loosened up. "So, is White Christmas still in with the other videos or did you guys pack it away?" Her mom looked up. "It should be with the others dear." Then went back to cooking. Taking a deep breath, Kat decided she had had enough. "Why are you being like this?" "Being like what?" "Like this." Kat said gesturing around. "You and Dad haven't done anything for Christmas at all sense I've been gone and every time I mention anything about Christmas you guys freak out on me. Can I remind you that you invited me home for Christmas. What did you expect me to do once I got here, sit around and be depressed for the holidays? Do you think that Shannon would have wanted that?" Her mom looked her right in the eyes. "No." "Then why are you being like this?" Her mom set her bowl down, wiped her hands on her apron and walked around to Kat. "Honey... the truth is... we celebrated Christmas all but that first year you were gone." "But you said... the boxes were covered with dust." "I know honey... it's just..." Her mom took a deep breath, "I know it might seem silly but, we didn't know how you would be. We didn't know if you would be sad on this holiday and miss her... you were depressed for a long time. Your father and I talked about it about how you might feel and then we wondered if you would be upset that we celebrated without you, so we pulled out some of the really old decorations today so the boxes would still have dust. We didn't want to lie to you, but we didn't want to hurt you either. We don't quite know how to act around you, it's different for us. Your in college now. Your growing up and we've missed being around you on a daily basis... just like we've missed having you here. We just weren't sure what to do." "Well," Kat said, "The one thing not to do, would be to lie. I want to have a good christmas with you guys it's why I came home and yes I'm sad that Shannon is no longer with us, but she shows up in our good times and in our memories. I want to remember her mom. I want to remember the family good times and yes it might be sad at times, but it's better then not remembering her at all, ok?" Her mom nodded and the two hugged. "Guess we should tell your father that you know." "I already heard." The two turned to see her father. "I'm sorry for lying Katie, it's just as your mom said, we didn't want to hurt you." "Well, thank you for trying, but I would rather you treat me the same as always then not, ok?" "Agreed." He said and her mother nodded. Then the three hugged.  
  
Peter watched out the window as the taxi drove down the street. "Make a left." He said. The driver did and as the cab pulled up, he indicated where to stop. Seeing a figure in the distance, he got out of the cab. "I don't need you to wait." He said and stood there for a few minutes on the snow covered ground of the cemetary. Breathing in the cool air for a moment, he slowly begins to descend to his fathers grave stone. "Hey Mark." He said softly stopping a few feet behind the huddled form of his brother who was kneeling at the sight. Mark wiped at his eyes. "What are you doing here?" "I came to see dad." Mark shook his head. "Figures." Stepping forward, Peter put a hand on Mark's shoulder. "Our father loved you... I've told you that before." Mark shook his head, not looking up or away from the grave stone. "He loved me out of duty... he loved you as a son." "You were his son too." "He didn't see that." Mark flashed in anger. "Yes he did." Peter said. "He loved you in his own way, same as he loved me in his own way." Mark shook his head. "I want to beleive that." "Then believe it." Peter said kneeling beside his brother. "Because whether or not you accept it, Dad loved you, he loved all of us and he would want you to know that. He allowed you to work with him. He wanted that for you. He would be so proud of what you've done with the company Mark.... he would." "He didn't want me to have it, he left it to you." Mark said looking at his brother. "He knew I wouldn't leave Horizon to run it. He knew it would be sold or go to you... I believe he wanted it to go to you." Mark nods slightly. "Maybe." He shakes his head. "Our father was a real peice of work wasn't he?" "Sure was." Peter said his voice thick. The two stood up and both looked down at the grave site together. "Peter I'm not going to hold how I feel about dad against you. Scarbro industries will donate to the scholarship." "You serious?" Peter asked delighted. "That's not why I sais those things, our father really did love you." "I know you beleive that Peter. " Peter could tell it would take time for Mark to beleive. "Besides it's a good tax right off." Mark smiled a lopsided grin at him and Peter smiled back. The two hugged and then began to walk back.  
  
Ezra walked across campus. He knew David had been using the punching bag lately when he was upset and decided to head to the shed to see what he could find out. Stopping outiside he took a deep breath preparing himself to enter, but before he could he heard David talking to himself. "Stupid David, Stupid Davey. Your father would get a real kick out of this wouldn't he." David punched the bag harder. "Damn old man. You think you can knock me around... think you can screw up my life, call me names and just keep me quiet." He hit the bag harder and harder as he continued. "Now you've gone and screwed up my relationship with the only person I ever actually considered a friend and was honest with. You ruined my chances with her. I'm sure your happy though. You never wanted me to have anything good ever. You just beat the hell out of me... your own son... you'd do that now because of the lying. I hate you dad. I hate you, I hate you, I hate you...." David continued to scream it out punching the bag the heardest ever and then collapsed against it and sobbed. Hitting him... beating him....Ezra stood their shocked as to what he'd overheard. David had been physically abused by the general. He couldn't tell Daisy this. He needed to tell someone though or David could end up being hurt more. Unsure of what to do, Ezra turned and quietly walked away. 


End file.
